Really, Isabela was no good at these kinds of talks. She just wanted to get out of this conversation. They made her feel uneasy because she couldn't hide her heart, especially now. She felt open and so very vulnerable, and she hated it. But what could she do? She couldn't just stop feeling the way she did. And she really wanted to come out of this talk for the better with Jaime and the only way for that to happen was to have this conversation. And of course she would never tell Cersei. Isabela didn't even want to attempt that. She was fairly certain Cersei might try to kill her if she knew, not that she was afraid the woman would succeed, but mostly because she didn't want to get caught up in things like that. And she was oh so aware that she was the other woman, the one who probably had no business being there, but she couldn't quite help it anymore. She was here, he was here, and they just needed to find a way to get through this.
Maker damn him, she hated the way he could make her heart both leap and break in the same breath. She really was starting to become that kind of woman, wasn't she? "I understand. You have known her your entire, so obviously you wouldn't know how to be without her. But you know you aren't alone. I'm really not the best at helping people, but I can do what I can to help you figure that out." Oh it was difficult to keep it together when he said he was here with her because he wanted to be. It was, however, far more difficult not to throw herself at him for that statement. "I am glad you're here, and I don't want to run. I'm so bloody tired of running." She'd spent the last fifteen years of her life running, more or less. And in this world, she only had a limited number of places that she could run to. At least in Thedas she could leave one land and run to the complete opposite side of the map and be able to know where she was and how to get around. Here? She didn't have that luxury.
Listening as he continued, it was only reinforced that Jaime was a man of duty, of honor. To the Void with those that thought otherwise. He had been justified in slaying that mad king, and she stood by that belief. He was more honor-bound than most people gave him credit for. Briefly, she wondered if Cersei even realized that, how much Jaime sacrificed for her. In her travels, Isabela had met many people who were honor-bound, but she'd never met one quite as bound as Jaime was. He was so very right, there were no other men like him, and that's one thing that attracted Isabela to him. "I am glad I did. But I think you gave me some sense of honor in return. Which is a monumental task, if I do say so myself."
When he took her hand in his, she bit the inside of her cheek. And he called her lady. Oh she was so far from a lady, though she couldn't help but like the sentiment. At least there was one person in this world and her own that thought that. "No, it won't be easy. But anything worthwhile is never easy, is it?" She looked him in the eye and fell silent for some moments. She had never met anyone she felt was worth the pain and fuss over, but Jaime was that man. "I'm not bloody good at these things, I've always avoided these situations or run away before they could happen. So I don't know where to go from here either. I just need you in my life, and I know that makes me sound like some needy flimsy woman, but it's true. I couldn't bear life without you. My heart has been broken too many times, and I fear it can't take another." She tightened her hand around his, truly needing him, and not just in the physical sense of it.