InsaneJournal

Who? Loki and Needy
What? Watching the movie he's 'from'.
Where? One of the few theaters still playing it!
When? Earlier tonight.
Rating? Harmless, aside from spoilers and gratuitous angst?
Note: Will contain spoilers from the movie (Thor [2011]), so if you still haven't seen it yet, be cautioned... and then go watch it, seriously.



So far, Loki was not entirely sure what to make of this experience. The trip itself had been uneventful, and they had obtained a great deal from the concessions counter (popcorn, ‘Icees’ - his own was the ‘cola’ flavor, because there was something excessively ironic about blue ice at this point - nachos... none of it familiar, they didn’t have these sorts of things in Asgard). The theater was not very full, so they had ‘good seats’. Loki had been feeling an annoying thread of unease from the time the plans had been made, and sitting in the dark watching the screen flash with images leading up to this movie he was supposedly ‘from’ only intensified it.

He had contemplated inviting his brother along as well, but the idea had quickly been dismissed before it had ever reached action. Yes, his brother had already seen it, and while Thor claimed to have been okay with him, Loki didn’t entirely know how well that would stand up to seeing this unfold again - being reminded of exactly what his brother was capable of becoming.

If he was honest with himself, he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted anyone to be present, but he sincerely doubted he wanted to try to explain that to Needy. While Thor’s trust in him was confusing, it at least had some logic behind it - they were family, regardless of realities and bloodlines. They had known each other - versions of each other - their entire lives. There was a reason familial ties were often the hardest to sever. It made sense that his brother would wish to trust him, regardless of whether he should or not.

Needy, however, had literally no reason to trust him, and that made the whole thing harder to even consider explaining to her. Especially given that the explanation itself (words like I might be exactly the monster they make me out to be at the edge of everything, the impulse to push, to see if he was really as capable of ‘evil’ as everyone else thought, to see if he was truly everything he’d read about himself) would likely drive her away - and probably Thor, as well, and with the two people he had gone, what else would there be but becoming that monster?

So, no. He had decided not to attempt to convince her that seeing this alone would be better.

It didn’t take long for him to feel completely uncomfortable with the film, but it was tolerable up until the point he had ‘left’ from - Thor’s banishment to Earth, and the story detailing what happened from there for his brother was hardly the problem. Thor - the Thor in his world - survived the fall, befriended mortals, started to learn the lessons Odin wished to teach him. It was almost encouraging to see.

His own scenes, however, were like that proverbial saying about pulling out teeth. He did his best to maintain his composure - sitting stiffly in his seat, unmoving and unmovable, as though someone had replaced him with ice stone - expression blank, eyes fixed on the screen, all the distress inside sealed away behind a layer of ice.

At least, he was doing well until his on-screen counterpart sent the Destroyer after his brother, and the dull sound of the impact of metal against his brother’s skull (I did this. I will do this.) lost him the rest of his stillness, sending him to his feet and carrying him out of the theater, then left him standing in the hall attempting to collect himself enough to form the words of a spell to send him away from here.