Juliet O'Hara arrests Winchesters (saltypineapple) wrote in wariscoming, @ 2011-07-05 20:47:00 |
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Entry tags: | juliet o'hara |
Who: Juliet. Narrative or OPEN but it works either way!
What: Realizations and distance. Anyone who might show up to the police station will only be told Jules left around lunch time without saying anything, didn't clock out which is unlike her, and didn't take her squad car.
When: Evening, several hours after the conversation with Ruby.
Where:The city
Warnings: TBA
[OOC: NO LONGER A PLACEHOLDER!]
The conversation with Ruby had left Juliet shaken. She honestly didn't know how to react. For the longest time she simply stared at her computer screen, scrolling through it as if trying to process what had just happened. She thought they were okay after the last fight. They'd talked and apologized. Apparently they were false apologies. Ruby still thought she was a joke, even worse agreed with her that she was supposed to end up alone. Juliet wasn't sure which one was the worst. She was sure of one thing though, Ruby was right. What had she really done for Dean that was good? Sam said she made him happy but Juliet wasn't so sure. Dean still drank a lot. She'd told Dean what she loved about him, and made sure to continue telling him on a regular basis so he would never forget. But she rarely asked on her own behalf why he chose to stay with her. She wished she would have. Maybe it would have reminded her what her worth was as a girlfriend.
She was mentally questioning everything. Running through motives in her head. Trying to piece together the puzzle that was her and Dean and drawing blanks. The Police Station behind her was still moving along steadily. The familiar sounds blended to white noise as Juliet picked up a pencil and tapped it against her maple colored wooden desk. Her body felt sluggish and her heart felt heavy. She'd gone from being good for Dean to being baggage. Maybe that was why Shawn hadn't chosen her either. She was just destined to be alone. When Mr.Yin had kidnapped her and left her dangling to the clock tower, she held onto hope that Shawn was going to come to her rescue. She knew full and well that his high school sweet heart had also been hidden away, but she thought she meant something to Shawn and that was where she made all of her mistakes. She got too attached to people. She assumed things she never should. There was no real evidence that Shawn loved her. Liked her yes, had a childish crush on her, sure. But loved?
Love was different. Love was a roller coaster. Shawn's infatuation with her was puppy love at best, the clock tower had told her so. Mr. Yin had told her that it was up to Shawn whether or not she lived, she had remained positive. She kept thinking over and over that he would come. The hands of the clock weren't going to have a chance to strike midnight and cut the ropes binding her to them. In the end, it was Carlton who had saved her. Shawn who had broken her heart. That was how it always seemed to end. Every relationship she ever had ended in heart break. She remembered breaking down and a hospital. She remembered being alone, and being afraid. That was exactly how she felt in that moment now. Even when sitting at her desk in an office full of people.
Picking the wedding ring out of her pocket, she ran her fingers against it's smooth surface and frowned. She still loved Dean, it hadn't changed and never would. Dean would be the last. She was tired of trying to find Mr. Right and always being bad for them. Or not having the correct timing. Always missing out. She was done. She felt like crying, but she was still at work. She was still surrounded by other officers who already treated her differently for being a girl. A female cop was one of the toughest jobs. Still she felt moisture threaten her eyes. Slowly she placed it on her desk and stood up. Without so much as a word to any of her colleagues, she turned and left. Her coat still hanging on her chair. Her gun attached to it. She always carried two, but it didn't even occur to her to grab it. Nothing but leaving did. Nothing but getting out of the suffocating building crossed her mind. Her head throbbed with every step she took. Every movement felt like auto pilot and lacked control. She needed to leave. Ruby said so. She was only going to hurt Dean if she didn't. That was the last thing she wanted, she loved him. He would be better off without her, and could easily find a new girlfriend. He was adorable. Anyone could love him. It wasn't a hard thing to do, even with all his problems, Juliet truly loved everything about him.
Leaving was the hardest thing she'd ever had to do. She would have rather faced a thousand Mr.Yin's then to have left like she was, but sometimes when a person really cared for someone else they had to leave if it was what was best for them. She knew that she had to let go if he was ever going to stand a real chance at getting better.
Leaving the department behind her, she carefully walked the streets. Every so often her eyes filling with tears. Finally she stopped at a park. Sitting down heavily in a swing, she gripped at the chains and let her feet touch the sand beneath the set. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. This story was supposed to have a happy ending, not just an apocalypse and future hellfire.