InsaneJournal

Dean was a moron.

There was nothing else to be said for it. He was a self sacrificing moron. Of course she was marrying another self sacrificing moron so she couldn't feel too angry with Dean. He'd been trying to help in his own way she supposed. Of course help in Dean speak meant giving up everything he was so Sam and everyone else got to be safe from Lucifer. He'd give himself to Michael and it would all be okay. That was the logic as far as Ruby could work it out and she didn't get it. She knew she'd fight for Sam, for the people he loved and the people she was coming to love too. But she wouldn't fight stupid. She wouldn't throw herself blindly at the enemy the way these boys seemed to love doing. And there was no denying that Michael was the enemy. What else could he be. The Archangel. The most dangerous of them by all accounts. And Dean had expected things to work out. He'd expected that they'd all be fine with him having his chosen vessel. He was ridiculous.

And Sam, Sam was hurting and Ruby didn't know how to make it better. What could she say that would make him feel like this wasn't his fault. Because in typical Winchester fashion he had decided that of course it must be his fault. That he'd messed up. The family were crazy. There were no two ways about it. But she loved them all the same. And when she'd said she'd marry Sam she'd also taken on responsibility as part of them.  Also, if she was honest with herself she'd caused part of what had lead to moments like this. Working with Azazel and Lilith she'd done this to them. Brought this life to them when Mary had wanted nothing more than a normal life for her sons. But this wasn't her time to dwell on the past and feel bad for what she couldn't change. She'd just have to go ahead and make her amends now. By helping Dean, making him see what he'd done was the wrong way to go about this and by being there for Sam.

He was already at the door to the panic room when she came down the stairs, still getting a thrill at jumping over the salt lines like they were nothing. The wish was holding. And she could go into the room with no fear at all. But she paused at the door where Sam was holding a tray and rested a comforting hand to his arm, leaning her head against him just for a moment.

"This is going to be okay. You're going to be okay and so is Dean." she told him as softly as she could manage to speak with Dean the other side of the no longer intimidating iron door. "I love you and I trust you and we'll fix this." she added and looked over toward the tray. It didn't look too appitizing but then she hadn't been allowed to cook so it couldn't be too bad. She believed that was one of Dean's requests, not let her anywhere near things he'd be eating.

She'd have been insulted, but it was fair.