It broke Sam's heart, knowing that Ruby was able to see all of this just as well as he had been able to himself. She knew that this future version of himself had betrayed her. Thought that maybe she wasn't even enough for him. But she was wrong. This...all of this was wrong. And Sam, screwed as he may well have been right now, was determined to find some way to make things right again. Ruby didn't deserve this. They didn't deserve this. They were gonna get married, they were gonna be happy together, and they were going to stay far, far away from Lucifer. He wouldn't screw this up for them. Sam wouldn't screw this up for them. Ruby had finally found something that she wanted for herself, not because some elitist demon with a plan had shoved it down her throat, and Sam...he was finally happy. For the first time in a long time, he was. Sure there were sticks in the road every now and again and they would always have some kind of issue to deal with, but he had her. At the end of the day, even if everything went to crap, Sam would always have her. Ruby always had him, too. And she needed to know that, especially now that she was trapped inside of her future, bitter, possibly even crazy self without any control whatsoever.
"Do you really think that your Sam is in any position to be protecting himself, let alone me?" Sam shot her a skeptical look, followed by a stern frown. "He's cracked. He can barely register half of what is going on right now and he's clinging to the little bits and pieces that he actually can get a hold on, making them out to be so much more than they should be. Like the blood. He thinks that the friggin' demon blood is gonna solve everything." Not smart. Not smart at all. "If he wasn't so unstable, I wouldn't have even been able to break through. So, just..."
Sam's face fell when Ruby pulled away, hand reluctantly dropping back down to his side. She didn't want him touching her. Since when had Ruby ever not wanted him to touch her? Not my Ruby, Sam reminded himself firmly. Biting down on his lip, Sam tried not to let the uncertainty that suddenly overtook him bleed through his features. He had to be strong. For Ruby. Sam had to deal with this. He had to get them back home. "I'm sorry," Sam said carefully, "I really am. How we got here, what happened to you..." Sam rubbed at his bare shoulder again, body tensing a little at the mention of how cold it was. Did he ever get warm? Was this body ever going to feel warmth again?
"You know that I will because I've seen this happen. I'm here now." Sam forced himself to look at Ruby in the eye. He had to. Sam had to make sure that Ruby, his Ruby, could see him. "It kills me, Ruby, knowing that this is where we're supposed to end up. That I made the wrong choices because I'm - I'm obviously...really stupid. But it's not gonna happen again. I won't let it. I know where we end up, I know how we got here, and I swear to you I will never say yes to that son of a bitch, no matter what is going on with me and Dean. Whatever I was thinking then, it doesn't matter. I promise you -" Sam stepped in closer. He didn't touch her out of concern that she might pull away again, but he made sure that he was close enough for her to understand that he was being honest with her. He wanted to change this. Sam wanted a better future, for both of them. "- and when I say you, I mean both of you - that I'm gonna fix this. I know where I screwed up. I know how I screwed up. So I'm gonna go back, I'm gonna steer clear of Lucifer, and I'm gonna be strong. I promise. So, please, you have to help me. You have to..."
Sam put a hand to his head, eyes screwing shut tightly. "No. I'm not done yet. Don't you..." He was losing control. The other Sam wanted back in. He wanted Ruby's blood. "Please, no."