She closed her eyes and looked down at his question. She so desperately wanted to say that was right, she never shared a bed with Much as she did with Robin before this all happened. But she couldn't lie to him, not about this. Because she couldn't stop the feeling that she was to blame, she remembered every single thing she did and she deserved his anger and his hate.
"We were together," she said quietly, still not able to look at him. She could just stay there with her back to him and pretend it wasn't happening. Soon it would be all over and she wouldn't feel like she was dying. "But every moment I shared with you felt truer than whatever happened with him."
What if he thought she was capable of such things now? She was engaged to Much and yet she had shown a very keen interest in Robin. What if he now wondered if she was capable of being with another man when she was with him? She certainly wasn't, but she worried it would be in his head now.