He wanted her to take pills to help her sleep, to keep her moods in a good place. No. That wasn’t about to happen. No doctor could take those dreams away, she knew that. Not to mention she had no intention of being out of her mind around her daughter. “With my child around me. No. No pills. I’m not gonna start with pills.” Pills would have to stop if he was gonna be with her, pills, powder, whatever he decided he wanted. She wouldn’t have them around Lauren. She knew he didn’t want to do it. Knew it would be hard on him. But she’d help him through it. She’d be there if he tried, and she believed he’d try. He had to give her that. He was talking about paradise with her. Well paradise with her meant changing. It meant stepping up and getting away from the drugs. Away from being as down on himself as she was right now. In fact they’d help each other through. Her for Lauren, him for his children. That’s how it would be. And together they’d be stronger, inappropriate as it probably was taking him from the shattered remains of his marriage. But she hadn’t done it for badness, hadn’t planned it. All she’d wanted was someone to be there for her, and here he was.
And it seemed they’d agreed, he’d stop the drugs and she’d stop the negativity. He’d make her world a better place just by being in it and Lauren would be happy in the long run. And he’d be proven as her father, she knew that much. She just knew. Because now, nothing else was acceptable. Any of the others...It wouldn’t do at all. Thought flew from her mind though as his hand touched her leg, just resting there, and he actually asked her was it okay. He smiled, and she found she liked that smile. Definitely something she wanted to see more of. He needed to smile more, and she could get used to that politeness. Men never asked her anything like that, if she offered them a kiss, or more besides, they took it, hungrily and never questioned the offer, and here was Sam, asking her. Actually making sure. She managed a nod, still unsure as to the protocol now. When it was nice like this, gentle. She didn’t know how to act.
“I’m sure it’s okay. I said I wanted you to kiss me, and I don’t say anything at all unless I mean it. You’ll learn that pretty quickly if you’re gonna be with me.” And he was gonna be with her. Cause she needed him, needed the closeness and the comfort, especially now. “I want you to make me believe everything you’ve said. Everything you’ve promised. Make me believe it in one kiss.” It was a lot to ask of course but she knew he’d manage. She’d kissed him before, when Lauren was conceived, and in their heated elevator encounter, but never like she wanted to be kissed now. She knew he’d come up with something different, amazing.