He was good at inspirational speeches, very good in fact, she could deal with a whole lot more of those. And she suspected he’d be okay with giving them. And every squeeze at her shoulder, every movement. It just added to how very much she loved him. He gave her more chances than she ever could have imagined she’d get and he loved her. And maybe he was right and the guilt was something good. It stopped her becoming what she was and she needed to be something else, someone new. She had to be who he deserved to love, whatever that meant. And she still very desperately wanted to kiss him, because that would make the guilt and fear and worry seem less hurtful than they did now, just for a little while. Just long enough.
And she managed to laugh at the King and Queen of France bit. “Nah,” she said amused, “Lichtenstein or something, never go for the obvious. You should know better. We can put on cheesy accents and get free food” she joked, “And yes, I understand, I get it, no lies, no strings, just you and me and whatever we build between us from here on out, and then maybe you can look back on how we started without feeling like its tainted because of me. I get it”
She was about to take a step toward him when he grabbed her shoulders, all her progress hanging by a thread as she knew full well he wouldn’t appreciate her comparing herself to the ghost of Jessica Moore. “...I guess, I think you could do better. Than a demon. You had a whole life planned out Sam, a whole normal life that didn’t include Hunting and certainly didn’t include me. I know we’d never have met if not for everything he did to you. I know you’re different than you were then, I just wonder sometimes if you wouldn’t have been happier, or if without the complications...it would have been easier.” He was going to get annoyed, she knew he was, but she hadn’t and wouldn’t mention Jessica. What would be the point, the ever present spectre of the dead girlfriend wasn’t something she much wanted to bring up to him
“I love you, and that means I think you can do better than me. I mean I’m glad you don’t want to, you have no idea how glad, But its still true”, she stepped closer into his grasp, hands at her shoulders, she just desperately wanted contact