My parents managed to give us a lovely blend of tradition and progressive ideals, I think. It is good to see the value in some traditions as long as it doesn't blind you to some of the downfalls as well.
As enviable as my schedule sounds, it can be downright grueling during filming, so there's definitely a trade off there. I honestly couldn't tell you how many times I've fallen asleep on set because I'm so exhausted from the schedule. But even so, I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I won't lie or feign ignorance. I know enough of what's public record of that time to know that the war was not kind to your family, but more specifically to you. My parents encouraged all of us to essentially disappear from the magical world during the war, though. My mum's a Muggleborn, you see, and she worked in the Muggle world after Hogwarts as an actress all throughout my childhood. We worried for her, of course. And my younger sister's last year at Hogwarts ended with Professor Dumbledore's death, so when things really came to a head, we were all out of school, and it was safest for us to disappear.
I realize, though, that talking about the war is probably difficult for you, so we can stop talking about it, if you'd rather.
For what it's worth, I do not think you should spend the energy to be generous with them or to be angry at them. They don't deserve to have that sort of hold over your emotions. And anyone who would hold your past against your children or treat them as anything other than the beautiful, innocent beings that they are deserve a long walk off a short cliff.