strchld_prncess (strchld_prncess) wrote in voicesinmyhead, @ 2008-02-18 19:38:00 |
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Current mood: | melancholy |
Entry tags: | manasa arasaratnam, prompt #07 |
Prompt #7-What was your greatest loss?
Everyone assumes my greatest loss was mother. As much as her death changed my life,it wasn't my greatest loss. You see,my greatest loss is also my biggest blessing. Had I not lost her,I wouldn't have been able to rest for so long.
When I was four years old,Luke and I became engaged. I was four and he was 8-It was the happiest day of our lives and even now,he remembers it with fondness. I was so happy and excited,but I couldn't find mother. I wanted to wear her crown so could be just like her,so I went looking for her. I went to her room and when I found her...he was there.
How could she do this to father? No one understood,you know-everyone thought they were perfect. Even Luke thought they were special. Why did she let him take her away? :(
I couldn't look,so I ran away-I wanted to be far away. It didn't matter where-Anywhere,as long as I wasn't there,watching him take her away. Once I was safe,I closed my eyes and everything was different. There wasn't war,hybrid filth weren't biting the hand that fed them,father was always home,Lilith wasn't crying and Luke could see him for what he was.
One of my cousins from Jaipur had come for the occasion. Her name was Ritika and even though we only spent time together when we visited,I always liked her. She was older and she always took care of me whenever I visited,so naturally she was concerned when she couldn't find me. She found me and made it better,the way she always did.
Once I stopped crying,she said she'd play with me. We were having so much fun,just me and Ritika-I wasn't even thinking about Gabriel after awhile. We could have played all day and all night,but then...something bad happened.
I tried to save her,you know. I grabbed her hand and told her if she held on,I'd pull her up,but she pulled us both down. I was so scared,but she didn't scream,she just held on to me as hard as she could until we hit the water.
I couldn't find her at first,no matter how hard I swam around- By the time I found her,she wasn't moving. I asked the animals to help me,but they couldn't do anything-I was so scared,but then I heard her. She promised she'd make it better,if only I slept,so I did.
I felt so alone when I came back. I wanted to disappear,but then she came and found me. She promised she'd never leave me,even if mother and father did. Ritika promised she'd fix it,if only I slept. Even if no one else knew,it didn't matter. She did and she'd never leave me,because she knew he was a BAD MAN. >:(
She always did so much for me and I never thanked her. Her death saved me and gave me life-I knew I'd always be safe,so long as I slept. Even if mother was gone and father wasn't the same,she was and she'll never leave.........
At my journal for roleplay or comments