Theodore. (thotts) wrote in vindicatus, @ 2019-07-11 14:43:00 |
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Entry tags: | daphne, daphne: complete, theodore, theodore: complete |
Who: Daphne Greengrass & Theodore Nott.
When: 1999.
Where: Daphne's apartment in the Muggle world.
What: Theodore finds Daphne and feels come out.
Rating/Warnings: SFW.
Status: Complete
He’d messed up. There was no other way to put it. It hadn’t taken all that much to find her. Not when you were Theodore and researching was something you did so regularly. The more important question, aside from where had she been all of this time, was what was he doing looking for her? Sure, they’d been friends in school and afterwards. There had even been moments where he thought there was something else there, just the spark of something, but nothing had ever come to pass from it. Now he was standing outside of her door. In the Muggle world. Fiddling with his wedding ring that he loathed so much with no idea what he was doing there. Well, he knew what he was doing there. That spark they’d had before had long been on his mind since he was put into an arranged marriage. Since he let himself be put into an arranged marriage, more like. Nothing at home was what it should be, but Theodore didn’t expect it to. Even still, emotional moves weren’t his thing, and as he raised his hand to knock on the door in front of him it seemed ever more pressing that what he was doing wasn’t logical. Daphne wasn’t expecting anyone, which made the knock on the door concerning. One of the things she liked about being in Muggle London was that she didn’t have people dropping by unannounced, that no one knew who she was. Then again, she was living in a building with other tenants and it wouldn’t be the first time one of them had disturbed her for a mundane and unnecessary reason. Moving across to her door, she pulled her silky robe around her and loosely tied the sash, pushing onto her toes to look through the peephole - and her breath caught. Theodore, who she hadn’t seen in… well, she hadn’t seen him a while, to say the least. A few murmured words to undo the protective wards, locks twisted free, and she opened the door to be face to face with someone she’d used to spend so much time with. But why was he there? What was wrong? What’d happened to bring him to her door? “Theo…” She lingered inside the doorway, hand resting on the frame as she studied his face. “I… what are you doing here?” “I’m not…” he began, his brow furrowing as he tried to come up with that reason for why he was there, but nothing came to him. Being this clueless wasn’t like him at all and it certainly didn’t suit him, nor did it make him feel at all comfortable. His dark blue eyes gave away how unsettled he was. “I’m not entirely sure.” He admitted, bringing a hand up to rub at his jaw. “Come in.” Daphne moved to the side to make room for him to get past, his being visibly unsettled doing nothing to tamp down the worry and unease she’d felt as soon as she saw him standing there. Not him specifically, but someone from the life she’d run away from, unannounced and unplanned. There weren’t that many who knew where she was to begin with, and he hadn’t been one of them. “Do you want a drink or something?” She locked the door behind them, grateful for that semblance of security, her arms folding across her stomach as she watched him there in her apartment. Theodore, in her apartment. It felt strange, was bizarre to see, and it made her anxious. Because there had to be a reason. “Did something happen?” He’d shaken his head at the offer for a drink, not vocalizing the ‘thank you’ that he would have normally given for the offer of hospitality. Theodore’s attention had been taken in by the flat around him, his gaze wandering away from Daphne just long enough for her to speak again. “What? No.” It was also unusual for his focus to move about so much. Typically he was so direct that even he realized he was acting oddly. Clearing his throat softly, Theodore met her gaze and tried to zone in on the current situation. He’d brought himself into her home after she’d so deliberately gone away from the world they’d once shared. And what did he want? He had no idea. He just knew that home wasn’t where he wanted to be and Daphne was. “Nothing has happened. I… I needed to see you.” “You miss me?” There wasn’t much teasing in her tone, just a little, because she could tell something was off. It was mostly there because she felt off-kilter, unsure of where to step or what to do. Seeing Theodore - he wasn’t someone she’d been trying to leave behind, more like he was a casualty of her leaving. Easier to have a clean break than struggle with the separation, or whatever she’d thought to rationalize and make sense in her head. “Is something wrong?” Daphne took a step in closer, studying his expression. He hadn’t said wanted, he’d said needed. Needed. Enough for him to search her out, show up on her doorstep. She reached out, her hand lightly resting on his arm, as if to prove that he was actually there. “Theo…” There wasn’t much chance to reply to her before she was moving in on him, her hand touching his arm in the most reassuring of ways that he couldn’t seem to handle at that moment. “I can’t be at home.” Home. What an odd concept. Home was once him alone, him without parents or stressors of any kind. Just him and his books and his research. Now there was a wife involved and it was the last place that he wanted to be. “I can’t look at her.” It was said with a hint of aggression, a side of him that came out only in front of his wife. Not being able to be home? That was something she understood. Her family’s home was a place she couldn’t even stand to think about, as sad as that made her for her mother, still living in the large manor full of ghosts and memories. One brother dead, another and their father locked away for life - she didn’t need to be back in the place where they’d once been together. That wasn’t the type of situation Theodore was talking about though, because he’d said her. “Your wife?” Daphne knew about the marriage, of course, though she hadn’t been there for the wedding and had no idea who the bride had been. Not that that was a surprise, not with how their families were, where marriage wasn’t based on attraction or feelings. It was a transaction, and one she refused to go through for the sake of the family. Her family didn’t deserve it, and neither did Theodore’s but he’d still gone through with it. Or so she’d heard. A multitude of quips died on her tongue before they slipped out, not wanting to make a flippant joke when Theodore’s tone had taken on an edge. “You can stay, if you want,” she offered before she knew what she was saying. “I know what it’s like, not being able to be home.” He’d nodded to her question, frustration for his home situation bubbling up in his chest. All of this had him so irritated. Theodore had never been like this in his life. Emotions weren’t something he dealt with, probably because they didn’t surface all too often and now that they were… well, it wasn’t pretty. Her offer had him looking up from how his gaze had been cast down momentarily, ashamed of how riled up his life made him. The surprise there wasn’t all too unexpected, not with how easily it had come out of her. As close as they had been before she’d left, Theodore never would have expected that sort of hospitality from her after he’d shown up out of nowhere. His brow still furrowed, Theodore watched her for a long moment in silence, searching her face. It came to him then, why he was really there. Why he’d gone to find Daphne instead of going to commiserate with Draco or even Blaise -- or someone that hadn’t moved out of the Wizarding world entirely. “It’s not just her -- or that -- it’s you.” Daphne hesitated, not wanting to read too much into it though it didn’t take much to read far with so few words. Theodore was... well, Theodore, and there was a reason she’d felt a jolt run through her at the sight of him through the peephole. They’d always been a maybe, on the edge of something but never toppling over, the world around them too chaotic and hellish to make sense of anything but surviving. She couldn’t stand there with the intensity of his gaze focused on her and not acknowledge that, at least internally. “What about me?” If he had just acknowledged this before rather than spent so much time in school focusing on academia, maybe they wouldn’t be standing here like this; both of them avoiding going home. There would have still been the issue of him being promised to the Selwyns as a husband for their daughter, but he would have fought it. “Everything,” he replied softly, his dark blue eyes locked on her hazel. Stoicism was his thing, so being here saying anything about what was going on at home wasn’t like him. That was enough to prove to himself that he was here for Daphne. “It’s always been you.” Lips remaining parted somewhat, Theodore’s expression gave away his regret. She took another step closer, hand moving off his arm to come to his chest, fingertips tracing along the opening of his jacket and coming to rest over his heart. Daphne could feel the rise and fall of his chest with his breath, the heat of his skin through his shirt, could almost feel his heartbeat if she focused hard enough. He couldn’t, and she wouldn’t, go home, but they both knew home wasn’t a building, some old house made of stone. Home was other people, and they could be each other’s home for a while. “I’ve missed you,” she said softly, gaze flickering down to where her hand was resting before moving up to meet his eyes again - pausing briefly on his lips on their way. “And your everything.” Confirmation that everything before hadn’t been one sided was given away by what she said. The way that her eyes paused on his mouth, causing his own to dart down to hers and back up. Theodore wasn’t all too familiar with intimacy, given his upbringing, but he did what he felt was right. Raising it, his own hand went to her hair, his fingers carefully playing with the ends before shifting up to gently trace the outside of her ear. “I’ve missed you, too.” A soft inhale was taken as he reminded himself to breathe. His soft was so tender, gentle, a far cry from what Daphne’d been seeking out in the Muggle world, full of late nights in clubs and bars. It was perfect, and her fingertips curled in slightly against where they were resting on his chest. It made her heart ache a bit, that it’d taken them so long to get to this point, but the important part was they were finally there, right? Her free hand came up to cradle his jaw, thumb brushing lightly over his cheek as she pushed up onto her toes. Being barefoot hardly did her any favors when he was already so much taller than her, but she could make it work. She pressed a soft kiss to his lips, exhaling shakily as she drew back. Lack of experience be damned, Theodore knew what he wanted to do -- and actually wanting to do it was especially important at this point in his life. There were no expectations -- just them -- and he watched with bated breath as she rose higher to press that kiss to his lips. It wasn’t his first kiss, not with what he dealt with at home, but it was his first meaningful kiss -- the first kiss he’d actually wanted. The tiniest curl came to the edge of his lips, his eyes focused so fiercely on hers, and before she could get very far from him Theodore leaned forward enough to catch her mouth with his. Her hand slid to the back of his neck, fingers lacing into his hair as she returned his kiss, fingers knotting into the front of his shirt as she kept him close. This was what she wanted, needed, more than any of the wasted nights out running from her world. Theodore was a part of that world, but not a dark spot that made her want to run. How could he possibly be, when even one kiss like that made her feel so alive? It felt almost desperate, that want to be as close to him as possible, not lose his touch, like if something stopped or there was too much space, the moment would be gone - or somehow in her imagination. Daphne broke the kiss to breathe, pressing up to rest her forehead against his, whispering into the space between them. “You can touch me, I won’t break.” Inhaling sharply, Theodore’s eyes fluttered open from how they’d closed once Daphne was returning the kiss. Her permission was exactly what he needed. Not that he was shy or afraid to touch her, but they were entering into unknown territory. Tilting his head, he shut his eyes and went in for another kiss, his hands moving this time to prove he’d listened. One slipping down from where it had hovered next to her ear and the other rising from his side, Theodore curled his fingers around her small waist and smoothly pulled her in closer against him. His right hand didn’t stay there for long, slipping to the small of her back and then up, his arm bent at the elbow and his fingers trailing up her spine before flattening between her shoulder blades. Daphne let her fingernails scritch bluntly against his scalp, lips parting easily as he kissed her again. It felt good to be held, not by some stranger but by Theodore, a man she’d known for as long as she could remember. His arms were strong, hands sure, and maybe she’d dreamed about a moment like this a time or two during their school years but her imagination never would have been able to do it justice. She could feel the press of his wedding band where his hand was on her waist, but she didn’t care. Catching his lower lip between hers, she nipped at it lightly with her teeth before letting it go, eyes fluttering open to look up at him. If he wanted, she would stay there on her tiptoes, kissing him as long as they could both stand it. Or. Sinking down to the flats of her feet, Daphne stayed close but took a step back, bringing him with her with the grip she still had on his shirt. One foot went forward as his hand moved down from the center of her back, back to her waist, and then the other foot followed. Pursuing her, Theodore moved as the grip on his shirt led him to -- and quite honestly he didn’t care where that was as long as she was there, too. They bypassed the couch, Daphne tugging him down to kiss again every few steps as they made their way through the apartment to her room. It was easiest to cut straight to the chase, not bother with wasting time when they’d done so much of that already. She nudged him down to sit on the edge of her bed, pausing to slide his jacket off before shifting to kneel with her knees on either side of his legs, sitting back onto his thighs. “There,” she murmured with a soft smirk, fingers tracing back through his hair and down the back of his neck to rest on his shirt collar. “Now I can reach you better.” “I suppose you can,” Theodore responded, a smirk of his own playing at his lips as he looked across at her. It was certainly more comfortable for both of them than standing there, but he imagined it made her world a whole lot easier. And he found he absolutely didn’t mind having her on his lap. His arms found their way around her waist, forgoing the hands this time. Lifting his chin Theo kept his eyes locked on hers until their lips met again, a slow kiss at first that quickly developed into something much faster and hungrier. Daphne let her arms rest easily around his shoulders, letting him set the tone and pace as she gladly returned his kiss. It felt like making up for lost time, shut away from the world and anyone that wanted something from them, just the two of them alone and happy. One of her hands slipped under the collar of his shirt, fingertips stretching down against bare skin and tracing her fingernails up his spine. Practically purring at the feel of her nails against his skin, Theodore’s back straightened more than it already was. Posture was inherent to him. Once he’d pulled her in tight against him, he let go of his hold on her with one arm and worked it back, careful not to elbow himself. When it was free, it slipped up so that he could cup the back of her head. Having her as close as possible seemed necessary. They’d gone too long without having acted on any feelings, and married or not he wasn’t going to stop. She let herself be pulled closer, pressing in against him and letting her hands run over his shoulders, down to his arms and giving his biceps a gentle squeeze. He was solid, real, and right there in her bed where it felt like he belonged. Where they belonged. As Daphne pressed him back, laying them down, she felt more right than any other time she could remember. Theodore may have been the one who’d come looking for her but they’d both found something that night, and she was going to live in that feeling as long as she could. |