innerslytherin (innerslytherin) wrote in viciousmoon, @ 2007-03-20 23:31:00 |
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Current music: | Dave Matthews Band - Dancing Nancies |
Entry tags: | albus dumbledore, fenrir greyback, poppy pomfrey, remus lupin, severus snape, voldemort |
Remus runs afoul of a werewolf - Part 2
Continued from Part One
Remus settled against Severus contentedly, feeling as if he were drifting on a cloud of something. "Merlin, you touch me perfectly." He couldn't keep his eye open.
Severus debated a moment, pressing his free hand against his arousal to give some relief. "Don't fall asleep, Remus," he murmured.
"Mm'no'sleep," Remus mumbled, liking how relaxed his muscles were. He smiled, though he didn't open his eyes.
"Yeah, that's convincing. No sleep." Severus smirked and fumbled with his fly.
Remus sighed and peeled his eye open reluctantly. "Fine, m'awake." He kissed Severus.
"Ohh, good." Severus kissed Remus back hungrily.
"Mmm, love you," Remus murmured. He shifted. "Need to take care of that for you..." He fumbled a bandaged hand towards the front of Severus' trousers.
"Don't be silly, you're in no position," Severus insisted, eyeing Remus' bandages.
Remus fumbled another moment, then sighed. "Want to help. Want to touch you."
"You can when you're well again." Severus gave up on his fly, hoping if he ignored his arousal, Remus would still be woozy enough to forget about it.
Remus sighed. "Fine, wait'l I turn over--" he started to roll on his side with a grunt-- "and you can wank without me watching."
Severus stared at Remus' back, horrified at how embarrassed that made him feel. He narrowed his eyes and glared at Remus' bandages, holding back a cutting retort only because Remus had almost died. Well, that, and he was embarrassed enough to have been made gobsmacked. He had absolutely no idea what to say to that, and decided to just ignore it.
Remus didn't hear anything that sounded like Severus wanking. He snorted. "If you're not going to, you can have the courtesy to shift up and keep my back warm."
"What are you so pissed off about?" Severus demanded crankily in an attempt to hide embarrassment. "You just got your end away."
"And now you won't let me touch you. Pardon me if I'm annoyed." Remus yawned. Not so annoyed it would keep him awake, though. His eye was throbbing again.
"It isn't -- you're injured!" Severus wanted to bang his head into the wall, suddenly.
Remus sighed. "Yeah, well, I'm just as annoyed at myself as I am at you." Remus yawned again. "Come hold me, Severus. 'M so sleepy."
Severus sighed as well and shifted up to put his arms around Remus. He was hard, and nestling his cock against Remus' arse didn't really help things, but he was much too ashamed of the idea of wanking in bed with his injured lover to do anything about it. He'd just have to be discontent. "Poppy said I had to keep you awake for a while before I let you sleep."
"It's stupid. I'm fine." Severus' cock was pressed against his arse, and Remus realised suddenly that perhaps there was something he could do for Severus after all. He made an interested noise and wriggled his arse against Severus. "Ooh, do that," he murmured.
Severus gasped, surprised, shifting a hand to grip Remus' hip in an attempt to still his movements. "Don't do that! Just lie still!"
"What, my arse isn't broken." Remus smiled and wriggled again. "It feels good, doesn't it?"
Unable to completely stifle a groan, even though he clenched his teeth together, Severus shifted back from Remus quickly. "That is beside the point."
"Look, idiot, it doesn't hurt me, and it helps you. I like that." Remus turned his head slightly, peering at Severus with his good eye. "Come on, give in or you'll upset me. I'm sure Poppy doesn't want me upset."
"Oi." Severus glared, somehow not enjoying being called an idiot, even though he called Remus that -- even with affection -- often enough. "I don't care, it's... pervy, if I do that to you. You almost died, and you're meant to be resting, not having some weirdo getting off by rubbing against you."
"You're not some weirdo, you're my lover." Remus' voice softened slightly. "You're my mate. And anyway, I think it's bloody sexy." He wriggled backwards at Severus.
"Yeah, but, can you imagine what people would think if they knew? They'd want to lock me away." Severus waited until Remus stopped wriggling and shifted closer again because he suddenly needed to put his arms around him and bury his nose in Remus' hair.
"What, that you're my mate?" Remus sighed and relaxed, because he had a feeling he wasn't going to win this argument. "I wouldn't let anyone lock you away. Mmm, love you so much."
"No, that I was frotting against an invalid," Severus uttered bitterly. "Though I don't know how strictly Wizarding law is enforced when it comes to homosexuality."
"They'd have to get through me first," Remus said, ignoring the irony of a badly-injured man saying that. As if he could hold off anything nastier than a charging kitten just now.
"What are you going to do?" Severus asked, giving the back of Remus' head a dubious look. "Wriggle at them?"
"Shut it, you," Remus murmured, smiling. "God, I love you, you know?"
"Love you, too," Severus breathed, relaxing as best he could against Remus.
Remus hummed. "You need to talk to me, if you're going to keep me awake. Tell me a story or something."
Was he serious? "A story," Severus repeated dubiously. "Too bad I didn't bring Hairy Snout, Human Heart, I could have read to you about males mounting females. Then if you did fall asleep, you'd have nightmares to wake you back up."
"You're horrid," Remus muttered, chuckling. "Yeah, you know, like a bedtime story. Only one interesting enough to keep me awake."
"I don't know any bedtime stories," Severus muttered, frowning. The stories in Playwitch hardly counted.
Remus sighed. "Make one up, then. Or, I dunno, tell me something about when you were little, before you came to Hogwarts."
Severus' frown didn't disappear. "There's really nothing to tell."
"Well, you must've had friends you played with, didn't you? I mean, you said something about the blokes you ran around with...though come to think of it you were trying to convert me to a life of crime at the time..."
"Yeah, I had some friends in the neighborhood. Mostly we went around getting into trouble, being places we weren't meant to be, defacing property, stealing, just...juvenile stuff." Severus would have shrugged if Remus could have seen it. "Mum didn't like them, but I did still hang about with that lot when I was home from school on break."
Remus smiled faintly. "My boyfriend, the delinquent," he said teasingly.
Severus chuckled. "It was just so boring there. Nothing else to do."
"Hmm." Remus yawned again. "You make me feel better. Having your arms around me."
"Good. Makes me feel better, too," Severus murmured. It didn't completely distract from his erection, unfortunately. "I'm so glad you'll be all right."
"Yes," Remus sighed. "Mmm." He closed his eye, relaxing further.
"What would keep you awake?" Severus asked. "Something interesting... Should I recount tales of the people I've killed? That wouldn't be boring..."
Remus shivered lightly. "That would give me nightmares if I ever did fall asleep," he admitted.
"But you're feeling more awake now, aren't you?"
"Just unhappy," Remus admitted. "I wish you didn't have to do this. I wish I could put you somewhere safe and keep the Death Eaters away from you."
"There's irony for you," Severus muttered, snorting. He stroked Remus' shoulder. "Look, I won't always. Once the war's over, I won't ever have to do any of that again. I can be..." Well, normal wasn't the right word. "me. Without any Death Eaters or Dark Lords mucking about in there. Then things will be better for us."
Remus couldn't find any humour in it, though he could see the irony. "Things aren't bad now," he protested. "Not for us. Just that what you do is so dangerous."
"I've killed your friends and you almost died today. What would constitute bad?" Severus asked in disbelief.
Remus shifted slowly so he could face Severus. "Us not being together," he said seriously.
Severus stared at Remus a moment, then leaned in and kissed him. "Yes. When the war is over, we can...we can be a more proper couple. We can tell people and they can bugger off if they don't like it, and Lily can stop accusing you of being ashamed of me."
Remus' smile was slow and genuine. "Yeah, they can bugger off," he murmured, and kissed Severus.
"We won't have to hide so much and I won't have to disappear if you want to have company over. Though likely I will, considering who you're friends with." Severus smiled, then kissed Remus again.
"Only if you don't want to be around them, though," Remus said softly. "Because if they want to spend time with me, they'll know you're part of the deal, and they have to be nice to you."
"And we can go places together...I won't have to pretend to be your enemy..." Severus was liking this more and more. "Your friends can't get away with hexing me. It'll be so great."
Remus kissed Severus again. "And I'll be able to actually talk to other werewolves without worrying about Death Eaters, and I can find out more about us, like what happened when I bit you." He licked Severus' mouth swiftly.
"Yeah," Severus agreed, smiling again.
Remus smiled. "Maybe werewolves do really mate for life," he murmured. "You can find out." He kissed Severus again. He liked kissing an awful lot.
Severus returned the kiss happily.
"Mmm. Sometimes I can't believe you picked me," Remus said softly.
"I'm lucky," Severus said.
"You're lucky," Remus repeated, chuckling. "I'm lucky."
"Good thing we know it." Severus kissed him once again.
"Mmm, yes," Remus agreed. He sighed happily. "Feel like the luckiest man alive, just now."
Severus held him close. "How d'you think I feel, finding out you aren't really dead?"
Remus hummed faintly and closed his eye. "Like you won the Triwizard Tournament and invented a new potion all at once," he said, smiling. His words slurred a little towards the end; he was getting sleepy again.
Severus chuckled. "Better than that even," he murmured, watching Remus and deciding it would be all right to let him fall asleep for a while now.
Remus' response was to hum again, though he felt warmed by Severus' response. He took a long slow breath. "Love you," he sighed happily.
"Love you."
Remus slipped easily into sleep.
In about twenty minutes' time, Severus dutifully woke him back up. He kept Remus up as long as he could, and then waited another twenty minutes before waking him again. The pattern repeated throughout the night, until morning had finally come.
Severus was just dozing off himself, unable to stay conscious a second more, when he was awoken by a house-elf bearing a large tray of food. He stared blearily at the little thing, then shook Remus gently. "Breakfast is here."
Remus twitched, then groaned at the pain that sent shooting through him. "Huh?" he asked intelligently. Merlin, he was exhausted. Why wouldn't Severus just leave him alone to sleep?
Severus curled against Remus, not wanting to wake up enough to eat. He wasn't hungry, he was tired. Very tired. "Breakfast," he mumbled, eyes closing.
"Food?" Remus said, shifting and then smiling at Severus. "You're lovely to be with," he said, and then beamed at the house-elf, too. "You brought us food."
"Masters should be eating now," the house-elf informed them. "Madam Pomfrey will be wanting to see how young master is."
Remus nodded and nudged Severus. "Thank you," he told the elf, then murmured to Severus, "Take the tray, will you?"
"Shuddup Dobby," Severus mumbled quietly, pulling the blanket up over his face.
"Thanks so much," Remus said. "You're a worse bloody nursemaid than I was." He sat up creakily and leaned over Severus to take the tray from the house-elf. "Thanks," he told the elf again, and the elf vanished.
"Nuh uh," Severus countered intelligently, falling silent a moment. Then he remembered that he was supposed to be staying awake to guard Remus the way Remus had guarded him. He hadn't started to doze until now, at least, but the thought was enough to rouse him again. Severus sat up, yawning, his eyelids feeling as though they might weigh a stone each.
"Look, there's eggs and toast and beans and sausage," Remus said, feeling a little more cheerful at the prospect of such a hearty breakfast. "I wonder if we have any orange marmalade." He started spreading butter on his toast, though doing it with only one good eye made it a bit difficult.
It was good to hear Remus sounding so alert, Severus decided, and dished himself a plate, hoping the food would keep him awake. "Can't wait till you're better so I can shag you," he said.
Remus had a mouthful of toast, but he made an appreciative noise nonetheless. When he'd swallowed, he added, "You'll have to let me sleep for more than twenty minutes at a time for a while before I feel up to it, I think." He took a large drink of tea. Aside from the throbbing headache and the duller ache from his swollen eye, he was feeling much better than he had been.
"Yeah, sorry. Pomfrey's orders. How do you feel?" Severus asked, pausing for a bite of sausage.
"Not horrid," Remus replied. "I'd be better if it weren't for this eye. How bad does it look?"
Severus shrugged. "Can't see it for the bandage, but there's some bruising peeking out. Probably nasty."
Remus took another bite of his food and chewed thoughtfully. "Mostly I'm tired and hungry, and my head aches," he said. "I want to go home with you."
"Well, that's very good to hear." Poppy had approached while they were absorbed in their conversation, and she was smiling faintly at Remus. "I'm glad to see you sitting up. No nausea?"
"None," Remus said, smiling at her in return. "Mostly I'm just tired, and a bit cranky with poor Severus because he was following your instructions."
Severus snorted. "There's gratitude for you."
Remus brushed his knee against Severus' to show he was joking. Poppy nodded. "I'll have a look at that eye after you've finished eating," she said, "but after that I think you'll be fine to go home."
"Brilliant," Remus said happily.
Severus echoed that sentiment, glad Remus' hospital stay wasn't going to be as long as his had been.
Poppy lingered as Remus finished hastily, then she unwound the bandages and clucked over his eye. "Severus did a fair job taking care of this," she said, giving Severus a look of approval. "Still, the swelling likely won't go down until tomorrow. We'll bandage it up again, and you can take it off in the morning. You said you have a headache?"
"Yeah, it's throbbing," Remus said. "But I'm not confused the way I was last night."
She nodded. "All right, then, a pain potion for you to take when you're home and settled into bed, and another healing potion for the eye." She spread ointment over the eye as she spoke, and her fingers were followed by a blessed cool relief. Remus sighed and relaxed some.
Severus slid an arm around Remus, silently offering comfort and support. "I'll take care of him."
Poppy gave Severus an approving smile as Remus leaned into him. "I imagine you're rather tired yourself," she said. "You can both sleep when you get home." She patted Remus' shoulder. "Here you are, then. Drink these as soon as you're home, and Floo call me in the morning if you're not feeling any better." She stepped back.
"What, I can go?" Remus said, smiling.
"You can go," she agreed. "Do be more careful, Remus. I'm going to run out of Healing Potions at this rate."
He laughed ruefully and climbed slowly out of bed, looking around for his shoes and clothes.
Amused by Remus' apparent unconcern with his state of dress, Severus got up and helped him look, when it was obvious that was what he was doing. Though he supposed it was ironic that he was more conscious of such things, since both Pomfrey and Dumbledore had already seen all of him.
Poppy seemed to finally realise what Remus was looking for. She popped around behind the curtain, then came back with a large bag marked 'Gladrags'. "Dumbledore sent these," she said, smiling. "He said he owed you both a set of clothes, so he might as well." She held the bag out to Severus.
Severus hoped to Salazar he wasn't blushing as he took the bag from her and handed it to Remus.
Remus blinked at the odd expression on Severus' face. "What?" he murmured, then peered into the bags. "Oh, look, that's nice. Corduroy trousers and a jumper, those must be mine." He took them out and tugged the jumper over his head, trying not to bump his bandage.
Severus smirked, then avoided looking at Remus as he dressed because he felt weird doing so when Poppy was around. He took the bag back from Remus but didn't look inside, instead hunting around for Remus' shoes.
Remus was feeling better, but not perfect. He leaned on the bed and got his feet into the trousers, then stood and pulled them up over his shorts, pleased at the way they fit. "My shoes?"
"Over here," Severus replied, bringing them over to him. He dropped them at Remus' feet and put his own on.
"Thanks, but I'm not going to put them on just to go home and go to bed," Remus said. He smiled faintly, then bent and picked them up. "Seems a bit silly to have dressed at all, I suppose."
"Maybe to you," Severus said, doing up his laces with a spell. "Ready, then?"
Remus nodded. "Thank you, Poppy, so much," he said quietly. "I'll see you at the full."
She smiled and nodded, and he went to the fireplace, reaching for Floo powder. Announcing his destination, he threw down the powder and was whirling his way home. He stumbled as he stepped out of the fire, catching himself on the sofa.
Severus gave Poppy his thanks as well before Flooing back to Remus' flat, and moved forward quickly, putting a hand on Remus' shoulder, though he wasn't in time to stop him from stumbling. "All right?" he asked quietly.
"Just a little dizzy," Remus said, trying to laugh at himself. "I think it was the Floo that did it. I would have preferred to have you Apparate us." He leaned against Severus.
"Not surprising," Severus agreed, helping Remus to straighten again. "Here, let's go to bed. 'M so tired."
"Yes." Remus lifted his head to kiss Severus' cheek. "Thank you for helping me."
"Of course." Severus smiled and returned the kiss, walking Remus to the bedroom with his arms around him, mostly because he just didn't want to let go of his lover for an instant.
It was comforting to have Severus taking charge like that, Remus found. He started undressing again when they reached the bedroom. Merlin, his bed had never looked so inviting.
Severus Banished his own clothes, then helped Remus with his gently after dropping the Gladrags bag. He couldn't help letting his touches linger over Remus' body as he undressed his lover, still so very thankful that Remus hadn't died.
Remus smiled up at Severus. When he was naked, he stood and watched Severus for a moment, then wrapped his arms around him. "Take me to bed," he murmured. "So I can sleep with you holding me."
"Mmm, yes, c'mon," Severus murmured, leading the short distance to the bed with his arms around Remus. He gave him a kiss, keeping his embrace loose enough to maneuver as they laid down, and then Severus drew the covers up over the both of them. "Love you," he murmured as they settled into each others' arms.
Remus smiled and relaxed against Severus. "Love you too." He was so warm, so comfortable...within minutes he was asleep.
Severus watched Remus relax, stroking his hair, until he too fell asleep.
When Remus woke, the room was only dimly lit and he was snuggled close to Severus, with Severus' arms protectively around him. He smiled and relished how safe he felt.
Half-awake, Severus murmured something incomprehensible and nuzzled Remus sleepily.
Remus hummed contentedly and stroked Severus' hair. He felt good, comparatively speaking, and he wanted to be held more tightly, but he didn't really feel like saying so.
"Y'good?" Severus managed, after putting forth a bit more effort, though he could feel himself wanting to fall back to sleep.
He needed a piss, actually, but Severus sounded so tired that he just nodded and kissed him softly. He could wait a while yet.
Severus hummed happily and fell back to sleep.
Remus lay still until Severus seemed to be deeply asleep, then he gingerly climbed out from Severus' arms and off the bed and tottered off to the loo. A satisfyingly long piss later, he washed his hands and face and brushed his teeth, then went back to curl up in bed again.
Severus woke when Remus curled up against him again, then wrapped his arms around Remus snugly. "Mmph."
"Love you," Remus murmured, kissing him lightly.
"Love you," Severus uttered softly, smiling as he sleepily returned the kiss.
Remus smiled and nuzzled Severus. "Didn't mean to wake you."
"S'fine." Severus opened one eye, peering at him with an unfocused gaze. "How are you?"
"I feel good," Remus said, kissing the tip of Severus' nose. "Bit hungry, but I don't hurt, except my eye's a little sore."
"Want potion?" Severus mumbled, nuzzling Remus' jaw.
"Mm, not if it's going to make me all muzzy," Remus said. "It doesn't hurt that much." He shivered slightly and stretched his neck, giving Severus access. "Would like to get my hands unbandaged."
"Oh, yeah. Probably can now, hmm? Poppy didn't say, did she?" Severus asked, kissing Remus' neck softly.
Remus shivered again and growled softly. "Feels good," he murmured. "Want to be able to touch you."
"M'kay," Severus uttered between kisses, then laid back and opened his other eye.
"Love touching you," Remus said. "Get these bandages off me." He nibbled at Severus' ear.
"Mmm." Severus took a deep breath, smiling at Remus, and sat up slowly to look over Remus' bandages. "All right." He picked up his wand from the bedside stand and spelled off Remus' bandages.
Remus smiled and reached out to stroke Severus' face. His hands were almost entirely healed, and it made him happy to be able to touch Severus. "I'm so glad you sent Dumbledore after me," he murmured. "Thank you."
"I -- " Severus frowned, then lowered his wand to the little table again. "He -- I didn't, really. I just told him what happened and he went after you."
"He came after me because of you," Remus said softly. He kissed Severus, barely brushing his lips over Severus'. "So you saved me."
Severus stared at Remus. He was well aware (though he didn't want to be) that if Dumbledore hadn't thought quickly, Remus would have died, because Severus had already begun grieving before his lover's fate was discovered. "Yeah," he agreed, trying not to frown.
Remus wrapped his arms around Severus' neck, burying his face against him. "I can't imagine what I would've done," he whispered, "if it had been reversed. God, I think I would've panicked." He shivered.
Right. He would have panicked. Severus put his arms around Remus and closed his eyes. Merlin, he felt like a fool. He'd have cost Remus his life, if not for Dumbledore. He thought back to his emotional outburst in Dumbledore's office, no longer seen as excusable, considering everything.
"I'm so thankful I have you." Remus stroked his hand over Severus' hair, enjoying the way Severus' arms felt around him.
Bloody fuck. "Well. And Dumbledore."
"Yes, and Dumbledore," Remus said. "But if you weren't spying for us, he'd never have known, would he?" He kissed Severus just above the ear and nuzzled him again.
Severus sighed.
Remus nibbled lightly along the shell of the ear, running one hand along Severus' back. "So good to be with you," he murmured. "Thought I'd never see you again."
"Yeah," Severus uttered, swallowing thickly.
"So good to hold you," Remus said, feeling suddenly as if he'd been the werewolves' captive for longer than a single day. He kissed the skin behind Severus' ear.
"Yeah," Severus said again, though this time emotion bled into the word, and his arms tightened around Remus, his breath hitching. "Merlin. I didn't think I ever would again."
"I'm so sorry," Remus whispered. "I wouldn't have gone if I'd known the werewolves were watching her."
"I know that. You're not stupid. You've no reason to apologize." Severus rested his head on Remus' shoulder.
"I'm sorry you had to be worried because of me," Remus said. He kissed the side of Severus' head and stroked his hair. "I hate that I put you through that."
Worried. Severus didn't say anything, remembering how he'd fallen apart so completely. Remus obviously imagined the scenario to be much different than it had been.
Remus frowned at Severus' silence; Remus was obviously missing something here. He cast his mind back over the last twenty-four hours, trying to sort things through in his head. He'd gone to visit Holly and her parents, there had been werewolves waiting...they'd jumped him. He remembered people snarling and shouting in his face about overstepping his bounds, how Greyback needed to keep his wolves in line. They'd hit him again and again...finally he'd passed out. He tensed, remembering. Then the whimpering, Holly apologising, Greyback showing up and shouting Ulfric's name...he thought he remembered Dumbledore gathering him up... "I--I can't remember," he muttered. "Severus--Severus, you didn't really think I was dead." Did he? He'd sent Dumbledore after Remus, surely he couldn't believe it...
What? Had he forgotten? Severus felt confused, wondering why... Did Remus remember nothing from the night before? All the things Severus had uttered in the moment? Perhaps, then, this was a chance to change, to rearrange what had happened. He didn't have to be foolish and weak. "No," he murmured, stroking Remus' hair. "Don't worry."
Remus frowned. "I...I remember you said...you said..." But it was slipping from his grasp again. Shite, why couldn't he remember? "You said I can't die...we said we'd be horrible old men..." He felt absurdly proud for remembering that much.
"Yes," Severus agreed, thinking quickly. "Because I knew you couldn't be dead. But I was worried about you."
"I remember..." Remus sighed. "I remember Poppy yelled at Dumbledore. Dumbledore...Dumbledore..." He paused. "I told Dumbledore not to be stupid."
"He was angry with himself for sending you out into a trap," Severus supplied, lifting his head to kiss Remus' temple.
Remus tensed again. "Poppy said you'd come and told Dumbledore I'd been killed," he remembered.
"That was what Fenrir thought," Severus corrected.
"But you didn't believe it?" Remus repeated, snuggling against Severus. "God, I--I can't imagine how awful that would be."
"No, of course not," Severus said. "I wouldn't believe that unless I had absolute proof. That's why Dumbledore went to find you."
Remus tightened his arms around Severus. "I'm glad," he murmured. "I'd hate for you to have to go through that." There was a silence. "Kiss me," he requested.
Severus felt a tremor of remembered fear, but ignored it. Instead, he kissed Remus soundly.
Pleased, Remus hummed and ran his hands along Severus' back, holding him close, drawing the kiss out.
Oh Merlin, but Severus couldn't get it out of his head -- he'd come so close to -- he really thought that Remus had --
He kissed Remus harder, holding him close.
Remus finally broke the kiss, breathing hard. He pulled away just enough to breathe, though, and stroked Severus' hair back from his face, gazing at him warmly. "I'm feeling much better than I was last night," he murmured suggestively.
"Yeah, are you?" Severus asked, forcing a smirk, though the suggestive tone didn't have to be coaxed. He slid a hand down Remus' back to caress his hip.
"Yeah, I reckon the healing potions all did their job." He kissed Severus again.
"So, just to make this quite clear... you're definitely up for a shag, then." Severus nipped Remus' lower lip.
Remus wriggled his groin against Severus. "Feels like I'm up for a shag, doesn't it?" Remus said, grinning slightly. "Yeah, want you to take me."
Severus curled a hand around Remus' arousal, smirking wider. "That's a horrid pun," he informed Remus, then kissed him.
Remus gasped in pleasure. "Must be your influence on me," he said. "I'm sure I had a better sense of humour before you got to me." He kissed Severus in return and stroked a hand down to cup his arse.
"What?" Severus demanded, then gasped, but then went back to the insult against him. "I have a perfectly functional sense of humour!"
"You find misfortune amusing," Remus pointed out, massaging Severus' arse slowly. He kissed Severus' neck.
"It is," Severus insisted, stroking Remus' cock.
Remus groaned softly, arching against Severus. "Love your hands on me."
"Sexy," Severus breathed, kissing Remus as he wrapped his other hand around his cock to stroke him hand over hand.
"Oh, God, Severus," Remus gasped, squeezing Severus' arse and trying to pull him closer. "Don't--don't have that much willpower. Don't want to come too soon." He bit Severus' earlobe gently.
Severus groaned, moving one hand away to calm down his strokes. "Okay, okay. Need...need to get inside you."
"Yeah, yeah, now," Remus agreed, sucking at the earlobe he'd seized.
Severus pushed Remus onto his back, breath uneven. He grabbed his wand and cast the charms to prepare Remus, realizing that he wasn't exactly going slow and relishing the moment, but if Remus didn't care....
"Love you," Remus breathed, shifting to accommodate Severus, his hands wandering across pale skin and dark hair. "Severusss...you're so bloody sexy."
"I know," Severus uttered, smirking, and pushed up Remus' legs.
Remus made an eager noise and tangled his fingers in Severus' hair.
Shifting between his legs, Severus lined himself up and eased inside, groaning.
"Ahhh," Remus managed, gazing up at Severus with his good eye. It felt so good, so right. "Yes," he whispered.
"Fuck, wanted to do this," Severus muttered, aware that didn't really make sense but not caring. He kept his thrusts slow and careful, though he was also aware that this was probably the most hasty, uncoordinated sex (including lack of foreplay) that he'd had with Remus...perhaps ever.
Gasping, Remus moved with Severus, one arm wrapped around his thin shoulders, the other lifted so he could clutch at Severus' hair. "Need you," he breathed. "Need you."
"Love you," Severus gasped, kissing him passionately as he moved.
Remus moaned into Severus' mouth, arching and clenching around him. He barely noticed the twinges from various bruises.
Merlin, the way Remus felt around him, the way he was moving, was challenging Severus' control. He moved faster, breath speeding up.
"Severus!" Remus gasped, sliding his hands down to clutch at Severus' arse, pulling him deeper. He angled his hips up, clenching around him. Oh, Merlin that was good. His chest heaved with his breathing and the little cries that escaped him with each thrust.
"Oh, Remus," Severus groaned, unable to keep from pushing his thrusts harder.
"God, yes, Severus!" he managed, arching his head back. "Belong to you. Feels so good!" Pleasure was building rapidly in him, already strong from the way Severus had handled his cock. His toes curled, digging into the mattress.
"Yes," Severus gasped, nipping at Remus' throat when it was bared to him. He tensed and wrapped a hand around Remus' cock.
"Ahh!" Remus groaned, his legs shaking. God, he understood, now, why Severus had wanted this when he'd been injured. "Bite," he urged in a whisper. "Bite!"
Severus bit until he tasted blood, squeezing Remus' cock.
Remus let out a yell and clenched around Severus as he spurted, pleasure washing over him in waves. "Yes, yes," he murmured, "yes."
Severus loved that, the way Remus looked when he came, how much he seemed to enjoy it. "Love you, so sexy," he groaned, and just a few thrusts later, came too.
Breathless, Remus stroked Severus' cheek and held him close, smiling. "So good, you're so good." He kissed Severus fiercely. "Love you."
Either Remus was lying to make him feel better, or he had really low standards. Severus supposed that either way, he was lucky. "Love you too," he murmured happily.
Remus hummed and smoothed his hands over Severus' skin. His chest felt tight, though he couldn't understand why. He was better, they were together, so why should he feel so worked up? But he swallowed and pulled Severus closer to him. "Need you," he murmured.
"Need you," Severus echoed happily, relaxing against Remus.
Remus sighed a little, though it wasn't really an unhappy sound. He nuzzled Severus and enjoyed Severus' weight against him. "I like you like this."
"Like what?" Severus asked, throwing an arm around him.
"On me, taking. Needing me." Remus wasn't sure if that made anything clearer.
"I do need you," Severus murmured, feeling anxious suddenly.
Remus smiled. "I know. I like that." He kissed Severus. "Wish I could see you properly." He lifted a hand and pushed Severus' hair out of his face.
"Yeah," Severus murmured, gaze on Remus' eye. "It's really bruised."
"It'll be better soon," Remus said. "Werewolves heal fast." But he wished it wasn't swollen closed. He nuzzled Severus and pressed a line of tiny kisses along Severus' jaw.
At that moment something began tapping on the bedroom window. Remus ignored it, hoping it would go away. He didn't want to be interrupted. But the tapping continued.
"What's that?" Severus asked, then paused to yawn. He didn't want to move to find out, really, but the noise wasn't stopping.
"Bugger. I suppose it's an owl." Remus sighed. "Probably for you." He poked at Severus. "Anyway, you're on top of me, so I can't move. Why don't you get it."
Severus made an irritated noise, but got up and did a quick charm to clean himself. He moved the dingy curtain aside, then opened the window when it revealed that yes, there was an owl on the other side. A very large one he recognized from Hogwarts. "The fuck?"
He caught the letter it dropped, glancing at the front. "Oh, look here. It's for you. From Dumbledore? We just saw Dumbledore." Why would Dumbledore contact Remus? Like this? What in the world could he have written? Severus stared down at the envelope, wondering.
Remus sat up, noting a few new sore spots. He stretched and then sighed contentedly. "Who knows. Perhaps he was going to tell me what happened to Holly. I hope she's not too upset; it wasn't her fault, you know--Ulfric made her." He got up and padded over to Severus, nuzzling him again and kissing his throat before taking the letter out of his hands. He broke the seal and unfolded it.
As he read, he began blinking. A line formed between his brows, and he went to sit on the bed, frowning down at the letter.
Severus closed the window distractedly, having heard the owl flap off when Remus opened the letter. He frowned, wondering what Dumbledore could have written that would have Remus looking so grave. It couldn't be too serious -- wouldn't Dumbledore use Fawkes if it was serious? "What?" he asked, worried anyway.
Remus cleared his throat. "My dear Remus, Poppy informs me that you are feeling much better, and that Severus is quite capable of looking after you now. Nevertheless I feel responsible for your condition, as well as for Severus', and I cannot rest easy until I express to you, once again, my deep regret for what happened. I have never seen Severus in such agitation as when he came to me and swore at me for getting you killed. I feared he would do himself harm, and although it has come out well in the end, I cannot forget his pain." Remus stopped reading and looked up at Severus.
Severus stared at Remus, mouth open slightly. Inwardly, he was cursing the very day Albus Dumbledore had been born, but he couldn't think of a thing to say aloud that wasn't swearing. "Dumbledore exaggerates things," he finally said, forcing a shaky bark of laughter. He really wished he wasn't naked for this. He turned quickly and drew the curtain, having no idea what else to do.
"You lied to me," Remus said quietly. He couldn't keep the hurt from his voice.
"Piss off," Severus said sharply, unable to look at Remus as he crossed the room to the closet. It was definitely time to get dressed.
"What?" Remus asked, his voice cracking. He stared at Severus, his chest feeling tight again. When he didn't get an answer, he looked back down at the letter. "I do not know why Severus fixed on the fact that I saved you, rather than that I sent you into danger in the first place, but while it is gratifying to have such loyalty from him, I fear it only weights my guilt further. I failed you both, my boy, and I beg your forgiveness. Severus seemed not to want to hear this from me, while you were in hospital. I hope you will agree to see me later this week or perhaps next week, if nothing else to reassure an old man that you are, truly, well. I remain yours truly, Albus Dumbledore."
Albus Dumbledore was a complete and total tit. Severus had decided that. He pulled on a set of robes because it was the easiest thing to put on, but didn't leave the closet, a little afraid to face his lover. Damn Dumbledore for being... honest. He didn't know what Remus wanted him to say, but he had a feeling he wouldn't want to say it, so he said nothing.
Remus stared at where Severus seemed to be hiding. Finally he sighed and got up, wishing Severus would come back to bed, because Remus was tired, damn it. But after Severus had said Remus shouldn't have lied to him about his job, Remus wasn't willing to let Severus bloody lie to him. "Severus," he said, crossing to lean against the doorjamb of the closet.
"What?" Severus asked flatly, folding his arms and setting his jaw as he forced himself to look at Remus.
"You believed Fenrir," Remus said quietly. He tried to make his gaze warm and his expression understanding. "You...thought I was dead."
Severus dropped his gaze and scowled at the floor, shoulders hunching.
Remus lifted his hands to cradle Severus' face, ducking to look at him. "I'm so sorry," he whispered. "I'm so sorry."
"Don't." Severus pulled away from Remus, heading back to the bed.
"Don't what?" Remus demanded, staring after Severus. "My God, if I thought you were dead I'd--I'd go mad. I'd probably go insult Lucius fucking Malfoy and see if I couldn't get myself killed." He grabbed Severus' arm, hoping Severus would at least remember Remus was injured and not pull away too harshly.
Severus stopped and glanced back at Remus, still frowning. "Werewolves don't mate for life," he informed Remus frostily. "And anyway, the bond we made was more 'forever' in the confines of life, not death. You're not supposed to get yourself killed, you're supposed to get over it."
Remus stared at him. "I don't care!" he said, his voice going up a little in pitch. "I don't care about werewolves, I care about me. I'm not going to just bloody get over you, Severus Snape!"
"You said it," Severus insisted. "They're your rules, I don't know why you're getting angry over them."
Remus grabbed Severus' other arm, stepping closer. "I don't care! I don't want to get over you! I don't want my life without you in it!"
"Don't be stupid. Only idiots kill themselves because of losing a boyfriend." Severus didn't move, not rejecting Remus' hold but completely ignoring it.
"Oh fuck you!" Remus said, not letting go. "You're not just my bloody boyfriend, Severus, you--you're everything!"
"You're being melodramatic. If I died, life would still go on."
Remus wanted to hit him. "Why are you so fucking thick?" he demanded, his voice shaking. He shook Severus weakly and then went to curl up on the bed because he was tired and suddenly he was a little bit scared.
"I'm thick," Severus muttered, voice full of irony. He watched Remus go back to bed, and wondered what to do with himself. He went back to the closet.
Remus shivered and wished Severus hadn't walked away. He was cold and it was stupid to be scared, but he couldn't help trying to imagine his life without Severus, and he hated it, he wanted to fall apart just thinking about what would happen if he lost Severus. "Don't leave me!" he whispered, though Severus probably couldn't hear him, in the closet. He fumbled around, trying to find the blanket.
Severus leaned against the inside of the closet door and took a deep breath, letting his head fall against a shelf for support. He'd been much happier letting Remus think he hadn't had any emotional outbursts. Dumbledore just had to ruin that for him. He wanted to have been calm and level-headed, the one who'd had the presence of mind to demand Dumbledore go get Remus and bring him back, in any condition. The one who'd not fallen messily to pieces on Dumbledore's office floor.
Did Severus mean that it would be easy for him to get over Remus? That he would just keep going? Is that what he'd meant? Did he somehow doubt that Remus loved him? Was that what he meant? Remus dragged the blanket over him and huddled under it, squeezing his good eye shut and telling himself not to be stupid.
This was stupid. Regardless of what Severus had wanted, he'd lost control, and he'd thought Remus was dead, and he'd completely fallen apart. And now, instead of clinging to Remus and appreciating the fact that his lover wasn't dead, he was standing in a closet, hating how emotional he was.
"Severus loves me," Remus whispered. He knew that, he believed it. Of course Severus wouldn't get over him easily. He was saying it because he didn't want to admit he could be vulnerable. He didn't want to admit Remus was a weak spot for him. But look at everything he's already risked to keep you safe, Remus told himself. The burning tightness in his chest eased a little.
Eventually it was just too uncomfortable to stand around in the closet. Severus slid into bed slowly and kept to his own side, worrying that one of these days he'd finally drive Remus off.
Remus made a small noise and rolled over to wrap his arms around Severus. He opened his mouth but couldn't find any words, so he just breathed raggedly and clung to Severus.
Apparently today was not that day. Severus wrapped his arms around Remus but didn't say a word.
That helped. Remus managed to stop shivering and pressed as close to Severus as he could get.
Severus stroked Remus' hair, sensing he needed it. "Are you all right?"
"Don't you ever leave me," Remus whispered fiercely.
This was ironic. Dumbledore had just written Remus about how much pain Severus had been in, and now Remus wanted that promise. "I won't leave you."
Remus snuffled and buried his face in Severus' chest. "Love makes people miserable, doesn't it?" he whispered. "But I'd want to die without you, I don't care what you say about moving on."
"I just don't want to think of you dying, no matter what the circumstances," Severus said.
Remus shook his head and tightened his arms around Severus. "No dying allowed," he insisted.
"No," Severus sighed, "no dying allowed." He kissed Remus' forehead and curled his fingers into the hair at the base of Remus' neck.
Remus relaxed just a little, taking comfort from Severus' touch.
Severus tightened his arms around Remus, closed his eyes, and took deep breaths. It was so frightening, to think of losing Remus. He didn't even want to let Remus out of his sight.
Remus made a faint, contented noise and smiled.
"Don't know what I'd do if I lost you," Severus murmured under his breath.
That shouldn't, Remus thought, be comforting. But it was. He nuzzled Severus until he found bare skin, then kissed it. "You can't lose me."
"No," Severus agreed, voice turning anxious. "I can't."
Remus kissed him again. "You won't," he promised.
Hadn't Severus just been insisting the world would go on if something happened to one of them? He wasn't too good at hiding his emotions from Remus, which was ironic considering what he'd achieved around the Dark Lord.
Remus licked Severus' skin, hoping it would reassure him the way it did Remus.
It would be all right, Severus decided, as long as they were like this.
"We're forever," Remus whispered.
Severus knew that forever was bollocks and Remus' soppy nonsense was just that, but he didn't mind.
Remus thought he'd admitted enough vulnerability for one day, so he kept from saying again how frightened he'd been, but he couldn't stop himself from licking at Severus' throat again.
Finding himself strangely soothed, Severus let his eyes close.
Remus slept.
Severus listened to Remus' breathing even out. He laid awake, silent and still, mind going in circles as he thought of everything that had happened. "Remus?" he whispered, shifting, but got no response. After a while, he accepted the fact that he couldn't sleep, and, now restless, decided that maybe a drink would make him sleepy.
He spent several long minutes staring at the ceiling, irrationally not wanting to let Remus out of sight. It was mid-morning, possibly afternoon, and Remus was fast asleep. Severus supposed, considering the time of day, he didn't need to go to sleep as well.
So in the end, he grabbed his wand, spelled Remus to the bed with a sticking charm, and got up to make himself a glass of absinthe. Then he came back to the bed with the bottle and the sugar bowl as well as his glass, and sat in bed against the headboard, nudged up against Remus' side as he drank.
When Remus woke again, he was pressed against Severus, who seemed to be sitting up. Remus yawned and stretched.
Or tried to stretch.
"I can't move!" he exclaimed in alarm, his good eye widening.
"Yeah I know," Severus agreed, dropping a hand into Remus' hair. He stroked it with a distinct lack of co-ordination and sipped his drink.
"What--what's going on? What happened?" Remus' heart was suddenly thudding in his chest, and his breath was coming faster. "Severus?"
"Nothing, I've just stuck you to the bed," Severus said casually.
"Stuck--what?" Remus stared up at him, though he felt marginally calmer. It wasn't anything awful, just Severus--sticking him to the bed. Suddenly he realised, marginally, how Severus must have felt when Remus abused his trust.
"Yeah, I thought, well, you know, you did it to me and it made you feel better, so maybe I'd feel better," Severus said, then paused to take another swallow. "And I do," he added, and drank again.
"I--you--" Remus tried to tense his muscles and found that was all he could manage. "That's because you were going to leave me!" he protested. "I'm not going anywhere! I didn't plan to go anywhere!"
"So?" Severus asked, watching Remus. He arched an eyebrow and shrugged.
"So...so..." Remus paused. "So why did you feel like you needed to stick me to the bed?"
"Because I don't want to lose you," Severus explained.
Remus blinked his good eye at him several times. "Right, but what if I need a piss or food or something?"
"Dunno, haven't thought that far ahead," Severus admitted, smirking a little.
"Right." Remus blinked some more. "This is a bit boring, being stuck to the bed."
"Didn't ask you, did I?"
"You aren't being very pleasant," Remus observed.
"So? What you going to do?" Severus found that a bit funny, sniggering into his glass.
Remus sighed. "Lie here and suffer, I suppose." He closed his eye.
"Suffer." Severus snorted.
Remus valiantly refrained from saying anything, though he rather felt like swearing at Severus. He could smell the absinthe, now, so he didn't expect he'd get much sense out of his lover any time soon.
Severus watched Remus when he didn't respond, then after a minute or two, put his empty glass aside and shifted down the bed, putting his arms around Remus and snuggling against him. "I could make you feel good," he murmured.
Remus hummed when Severus snuggled against him, then opened his good eye again and peered down at him as best he could without being able to move his head. "Could you."
"Yeah, I like making you feel good," Severus murmured, groping Remus' arse.
Remus let out an involuntary noise of pleasure, but tried not to respond. This was embarrassing.
Severus kissed nearby skin, humming softly. "Mmm, Remus, love you," he uttered, stroking his hands over Remus' skin.
Remus sighed. "Love you too," he said.
"Kiss me," Severus murmured, still stroking skin.
"Can't, exactly, can I?" Remus said, voice flat.
"But I love you," Severus protested, as if that made some difference.
"Yes, well, that doesn't enable me to move," Remus said tartly.
"Oh, where's my wand?" Severus mumbled, fumbling back through air for it. When that didn't help, he shifted and draped himself over Remus. "All right, I'll just kiss you," he muttered, and kissed Remus' shoulder.
Remus sighed. "You're a prat," he murmured, but his tone was gentle.
"I could look for it," Severus offered. "Like kissing you." He smiled lazily.
"I like it better when I can move," Remus said.
"Yeah well, I like it better when you're safe," Severus countered.
"Nothing's going to happen to me while we're snogging," Remus promised.
Severus sighed and pushed himself into a sitting position, looking around. He grumbled to himself, then spied his wand on the bedside stand. Severus snatched it up and pointed it at Remus, gaze intent as he tried to focus. What was the release spell?
Remus watched him for a moment, and when no spell seemed forthcoming, he suggested, "Finite."
"Oh yeah!" Severus laughed a moment, then twirled his wand and pointed it back to Remus again. "Finite!"
"God, how much did you drink?" Remus grumbled as he moved and stretched. He sat up and wrapped his arms around Severus. "You're a berk," he said fondly.
"Mmm." Severus leaned into Remus' embrace, smiling stupidly. "Love you."
Remus chuckled. "I love you," he said, stroking Severus' hair. "Love you madly, obviously."
"Yeah. Love molesting you, too." Severus nuzzled Remus happily.
Remus' laughter was more genuine and easy this time. "Mmm, I love it when you molest me," he said, rolling Severus down onto the mattress.
Severus grinned up at Remus. "Right me too, yeah." He slid his hand up Remus' chest.
"You're sweet when you're drunk," Remus murmured, his lips tickling against Severus' throat.
"S'because I like you." Severus arched his throat out for Remus, pleased.
"Mmm, I like you, too," Remus said, nibbling very lightly against the skin. How could he hold anything against Severus when he was being so affectionate like this?
"Feels good." Severus ran his hands over Remus' chest, pleased.
Remus smiled and placed a line of kisses along Severus' throat.
"Oh, Remus," Severus sighed softly. "'M sorry I stuck you to the bed. Scared."
Remus swallowed against the emotion that welled up at that admission. He stroked Severus' hair back from his face and licked at Severus' skin. "It's all right," he murmured. "I understand." He lifted his head to kiss Severus slowly.
"Good, thanks," Severus murmured, sliding an arm around Remus' neck.
Smiling, Remus hummed and closed his eye.
Soft snores met Remus' ears only a moment later.
Remus shook his head and snickered. At least he wasn't still stuck to the bed. He got up and went to the kitchen, where he started a pot of tea. Once he had tea and a book, he went back to bed.
Severus shifted a little when Remus settled next to him again, but didn't wake.
After two cups of tea, Remus' eyelids were getting heavy again. He didn't usually have trouble staying awake while reading, but he decided that, considering he'd nearly been killed yesterday, it was understandable. He let the book fall closed and turned over to snuggle against Severus.
Severus slept on.
Remus fell asleep too.