innerslytherin (innerslytherin) wrote in viciousmoon, @ 2007-01-23 16:37:00 |
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Current music: | Chester Travis - All That I Can Be |
Entry tags: | albus dumbledore, remus lupin, remus/severus, severus snape |
A meeting with Dumbledore (Angst warning)
Severus pulled on his trousers and flopped over onto the bed. His hair was damp against his cheek from the shower he'd just finished, and irritated, he did a drying charm on it. It looked mildly less-dirty in general if he didn't comb it, so he decided not to bother and pulled his feet up on the bed. Of course he shouldn't be lying down, he should be putting his shirt on, but he was procrastinating, and he didn't care. He was not looking forward to this meeting with Dumbledore.
Remus, barefoot and in jeans and a tatty jumper, wandered in from the front room, eating takeaway from the night before. "I thought you were meant to be seeing Dumbledore," he said, trapping some noodles in his chopsticks and dangling them over Severus' mouth.
Severus hooked two fingers into a hole in Remus' jumper hem and bit off some noodles. He chewed and swallowed before answering. "I am," he said, with all the enthusiasm of a man awaiting the Kiss.
"Don't sound so excited," Remus said, grinning crookedly at him. "He's not in the habit of torturing people or anything, you know." He lay down and propped his head on Severus' hipbone so he could keep eating.
"I know that," Severus said scornfully, as if the idea of being chastised wasn't even on his list of 'why I don't want to go see Dumbledore'. "I just don't want to go."
"Mmm, obviously I'd much rather you were here, but considering I'm probably going to pass out in another half hour anyway, I wouldn't be very good company." Remus slurped the last of the noodles and then rolled over on his side to blink lazily at Severus. "I love looking at you."
Severus frowned, but it was difficult when Remus was looking at him like that, so he gave it up fairly quickly. "You're odd."
"Didn't we establish that about six months ago?" Remus said, grinning. He turned his head and nuzzled Severus' navel.
"Nnn, yeah. Just keeping you updated." Severus let out a quiet gasp. "Don't distract me now, I'm supposed to be going to see Dumbledore."
Remus sighed. "But it's hard to resist when you display yourself for me like this." He kissed Severus' stomach and sat up. "Wretched man. Go before I'm forced to ravish you."
Displaying himself? Severus gave Remus a confused glance but decided he must be joking. "But that's so much better sounding than leaving," he said, lowering his eyelids and smirking. He told himself that he needed to get up and put on his shirt and robes and Floo to Dumbledore's office, and that this was not behavior conducive to accomplishing that, but... All right, so maybe he was a tease.
"Of course it is, but it would get me in trouble with Dumbledore." Remus trailed his fingers up the edge of Severus' ribcage and leaned down to kiss Severus slowly and thoroughly before he chucked him out to his meeting.
Bloody hell, that was nice. Severus slid a hand into Remus' hair, enjoying the long, drawn-out kiss.
Remus hummed with pleasure, wishing he really could keep Severus here. But finally he pulled away, his breathing uneven. "You should go, or I'm not going be able to behave myself," he said raggedly.
Severus let out a sigh. "How is that supposed to make me want to go?" he complained, but forced himself to slowly, reluctantly get up and grab a shirt.
"Just be very good so Dumbledore will send you home early," Remus said. "Then you can wake me up and tell me about it and I'll misbehave." He smiled and flopped over on the bed.
"Ooh, an incentive to be good," Severus said, smirking as he finished buttoning his shirt. "Perhaps I will be, for the first time ever." He grabbed his robes and just undid a few buttons at the collar so he could pull them on over his head, then shook his hair out of his face and buttoned them up again.
And found himself staring longingly at the very inviting bed with the very inviting Remus in it. "This had better be the shortest meeting ever."
Remus laughed. "I suspected you would only be good if given proper incentive," he teased. "Go on. I'll be here when you get home."
"All right," Severus sighed, glancing at Remus over his shoulder as he turned away, and then checked the clock quickly. "Ah, shite, I'd better go. Bye." He gave Remus one last look of longing, then forced himself to pay attention to where he was walking so he didn't miss the doorway.
He used some Floo powder to make the green fire roar up, then announced his destination and stepped into the flames, tucking his elbows in as the network sucked him out of Remus' grate and all the way to Hogwarts. He was a bit distracted, so he stumbled a bit more than usual when he was tossed out into Dumbledore's office. Then he spent more time than necessary dusting off his robes when he realised that he wasn't too keen at all to have to see Dumbledore so soon after shouting at the man to piss off.
Dumbledore set aside the papers he'd been studying and looked up from his desk. "Good evening, Mr Snape," he said quietly.
Oh bloody hell. This was the last place Severus wanted to be right now. He looked up at Dumbledore and immediately hid behind his Occlumency. It came faster now, he'd noticed; it was easier to clear his mind and find that welcome indifference--something he had Dumbledore to thank for. "Evening." He was still a little rigid as he moved to take a seat before the Headmaster's desk, though.
"How have you been?" Dumbledore asked politely.
"Fine," Severus said, before even thinking about the question. It wouldn't do to hesitate. He wondered if he should return the question. "You?" he asked, and fought the urge to look away easily.
Dumbledore smiled slightly and raised his eyebrows. "Fine," he replied, his voice reflecting some humour. "Though I have had a bit of trouble with the Slytherins this evening. Something about exploding cauldrons and a haunted bed, I think Professor Slughorn said."
Severus reminded himself sternly that Dumbledore did not give one damn about him, and very obviously hadn't been pleased about his and Remus' 'association'. "How trying," he said blandly.
"Hmm." Dumbledore sighed. "I suspect there are Gryffindors involved, though I haven't yet determined exactly how." He waved a hand at his teaset. "Would you like some tea?"
"Of course they are," Severus murmured, glancing at the tea set. He wavered uncertainly for a moment, then decided to just appease his paranoia. "No thank you."
Dumbledore chuckled. "Is there a type of tea that would suit you better than Earl Grey?" he asked. "I can't remember the last time you willingly consumed something in my presence, Mr Snape. I believe you are rivalled in your paranoia by only Alastor Moody."
Severus felt insulted for a moment, but let the emotion wash away quickly. "The day at the Hog's Head when your brother caught me outside the door," he said matter-of-factly instead, wondering how much of a gormless idiot that made him if he was getting compared to Moody.
"Ah, yes, of course," Dumbledore said. "And how is Remus? I understand he's been working in London?"
Severus was curious as to why Dumbledore was being so pleasant. He'd expected more anger, if anything, or at least some sort of chastisement. Perhaps after the small talk. "He's fine. He works down the docks."
Dumbledore nodded slowly. "A Muggle job?" he enquired.
"Yeah." Severus caught himself nodding slowly too and stopped quickly.
"That doesn't...bother you?" Dumbledore took a sip of his tea, watching Severus' face.
Severus' eyes had wandered to Dumbledore's desk; they froze at that question, though he'd seen it coming. He felt a flash of anger but let that, too, roll away. "No. Well. It does, actually, yeah."
Dumbledore simply sat and waited for Severus to elaborate, his blue eyes fixed on Severus'.
"I know it's not his first choice," Severus said mildly, struggling to phrase things without revealing too much about either of them. "I know what he'd like to be doing, and he can't, so it does bother me. But." He met Dumbledore's gaze. "I don't care that it's Muggle work."
Dumbledore nodded again. "And the situation with Remus' friends...how is that working out?"
"Fine." Severus kept his gaze steady. It wasn't as if he'd even seen them.
"I assume there has been no, ah, fallout from the incident in Diagon Alley?"
"Not thus far. Not from me, and if Remus has had any, he hasn't said."
Dumbledore's eyebrows went up slightly. "And it's caused no stress on your relationship with Remus?"
"Nope." Severus was pleased with how calm he was. He didn't like Dumbledore asking questions that went anywhere near his relationship, but he was confident that as long as he remained vague, he'd be fine.
Dumbledore nodded again and poured himself a second cup of tea. "Remus' friends were not so pleasant when I spoke with them earlier this week," he said after a short silence.
Severus tried to breathe in deeply through his nose without being obvious about it. "There's a surprise," he said dryly.
"They made allegations against you, of course," Dumbledore said. "That was expected." He steepled his fingers and watched Severus over them. "What I did not expect was that they would suggest perhaps Remus is not as dedicated to the Order as one might expect."
"What?" It was startled out of him; he'd been listening too closely. Fuck, so much for indifference.
Dumbledore's expression didn't change. "Oh, nothing was said specifically, but Sirius was quite adamant about the strange way Remus has been behaving lately. Spending more time away from his friends, turning down invitations to meals. He seems to be doing better financially, as well, which was apparently cause for concern in James' opinion."
Severus stared at Dumbledore in surprise with a sinking feeling in his stomach. "I told him not to stop seeing them," he protested. "And--but--if he's doing better, well, he's working a lot more! And labour pays better than a job in a stupid book shop! I haven't been giving him money!"
He realized abruptly that he was almost shouting. Shite.
Dumbledore was watching Severus with eyebrows raised and forehead wrinkled. "I told them they had no cause for concern, of course," he said. "Remus works long hours at a physically tasking job. I don't believe those facts had occurred to them." He folded his hands and settled back in his chair. "It...upsets you, how Remus' friends view him?"
Bad idea, giving Dumbledore ammunition. Severus scowled. "Well, why were they saying those things? I mean, what were they implying? Going behind his back to you and saying he's acting strange... He trusts them."
"Are there werewolves among the Death Eaters, Severus?"
Severus blinked, pausing a moment to figure out how those two topics were related. "One, so far as I know."
"And has Tom ever discussed the possibility of adding more werewolves to his service?"
"Not to me," Severus said quietly.
Dumbledore kept his gaze on Severus. "There has already been one attempt on Remus' life. Do you feel he is still a target?"
"No...I was trying to find out for a while...discreetly of course...but--the Dark Lord seemed to have focused on other things...other targets." Severus frowned as the pieces from Dumbledore's questions clicked together.
Dumbledore nodded slowly. "Could that be, perhaps, because his secret is no longer as safe as it once was?"
Then Severus remembered--one comment Remus had made offhandedly that Severus hadn't even thought about at the time because they'd been rowing about staying together. "Fenrir Greyback," he said, feeling stupid that he'd dismissed Remus' remark before.
"Fenrir Greyback?" Dumbledore repeated, tilting his head.
"That's the Death Eater werewolf," Severus said slowly, mentally swearing at himself. "That's the werewolf that bit Remus."
Dumbledore's chin lifted slightly and he sat back in his chair. "You haven't mentioned this before."
"Remus doesn't know that he's a Death Eater." Oh fuck. Severus hated feeling stupid, and he was definitely feeling that way now. "I forgot--Remus only mentioned it--we were arguing at the time, and I didn't remember--the Prewetts. It was the morning before I came to tell you what had happened." He met Dumbledore's gaze for a moment. "We--I was injured badly and we were arguing. I completely forgot about it."
Dumbledore sighed and then tilted his head again, as if his curiosity were piqued. "You and Remus argued about the Prewetts?"
"Partly that." Severus' eyes darted away. "And he mentioned that his father had done something to make Fenrir Greyback angry enough to bite him. It was very offhand."
"Partly about the Prewetts...and partly about...?"
Severus sighed, looking irritated. "Us."
Dumbledore took a sip of his tea. "I don't wish to argue with you, but I am very concerned about your choice to begin a relationship now. Not only is it inadvisable because of the war...but Severus, everyone believes that you and Remus are on opposite sides in this war. I can't imagine Tom would approve of your relationship with a werewolf, if it became public knowledge." He cleared his throat delicately. "Or of your relationship with another man." He paused. "It would certainly cast aspersions on Remus' character, were anyone to discover he was...romantically involved with a Death Eater."
Severus tightened his jaw, trying not to react to Dumbledore's words, but he found it incredibly difficult to not be angry when he wanted to be angry. "It's too late for that," he said sharply. "It isn't at the beginning. It's been going on for several months. I'm not going to leave him."
"Severus," Dumbledore said, and then paused. After a moment he sighed. "Severus, I am concerned for you, as well as for Remus. I do hope you realise that. Your safety and well-being are important to me. More than that, your happiness. My dear boy, it worries me that you are so...fierce about your relationship with Remus."
"What?" That was twice now Dumbledore had startled that out of him. Severus blinked rapidly, feeling stupid for saying it. But... "What do you mean?" he didn't understand.
Dumbledore sighed again. "You seem to place a great deal of faith in him, to, in some way, define yourself by him. I am concerned that without Remus, you would...lose yourself."
That was like a blow to the face. Severus recoiled as best he could into his chair, frowning. "I do not. What's wrong with having faith in someone? I'd think you'd approve of that. And anyway," he added, growing more adamant, "what's the point in telling me that we shouldn't be together if you think I'd be...damaged if we were apart?"
"I confess, I hadn't realised, until Remus' recent remarks, just how serious your relationship was," Dumbledore said. He looked troubled. "The depth of Remus' anger startled me. I am not entirely sure he knows himself, and if you define yourself by him, I worry for the outcome. Severus, you are your own man. I believe it is imperative that you know yourself aside from any relationship you might have."
This was all...so confusing. And it wasn't getting any clearer. "What are you talking about?" Severus burst out, exasperated. "I do not define myself by Remus."
"Who are you, Severus?"
Severus just stared at him. That wasn't a fair question! Who could ever answer that question satisfactorily? Severus was willing to bet a sack full of Galleons even Dumbledore didn't have a ready answer for that question! "I am me," he growled, irritated. "I am not a label or a title or some odd little thing Remus picked up on the side of the road."
Dumbledore tilted his head back, watching Severus. "Who is Remus?"
Severus hoped his glare was properly conveying the depth of his displeasure. He immediately thought of a dozen of adjectives that came to mind when he thought of Remus; all the things he loved about him and a few that really irritated him. But he wasn't about to tell Dumbledore all of that. "A boy," he said stiffly, folding his arms.
Dumbledore chuckled. "More specifically."
"I'm not telling you what I think of him." Severus scowled at the carpet.
"Why do you feel so defensive about your relationship with him? Your feelings for him?"
"Because you don't think I should be with him!"
Dumbledore frowned slightly. "Do you enjoy keeping it a secret?"
Severus expelled an angry breath of air. "No, but it has to be, doesn't it? It's not right that we're together," he answered bitterly.
There was a silence. Finally Dumbledore said, "Severus, I don't want you to think I am judging you for choosing to..." He paused. "For choosing another man as your romantic partner." There was another short silence. "The world is not necessarily friendly towards such relationships, our world, particularly so, compared to the Muggle one; but I believe firmly that love can never be a bad thing, whatever form it chooses." He sighed. "But your life is already a difficult one. I confess that I worry. You and Remus both have so much against you already. It seems to me you have chosen to make your life more difficult than it must be."
"I've already said I won't leave him," Severus said stonily, posture folded in on himself as much it could be.
Dumbledore sighed again. "Well. If nothing else, I find I must admire your loyalty to him." He poured himself another cup of tea. "Regulus spoke well of Remus, too. Remus has a talent for...attracting people." He sipped at his tea.
"Did he," Severus muttered, feeling resentful. If Dumbledore was trying to lure him into reacting jealously, Severus was determined not to.
"I don't believe Remus realises his own appeal," Dumbledore said. "He has certainly never realised his power."
"No, he's rather clueless about that." Severus slumped in his chair and stared at the carpet.
Dumbledore sat and watched Severus in silence.
"I didn't get to see Regulus again before he died," Severus said suddenly, not looking up. "After he defected." He still had guilt about it, but it wasn't a topic he'd normally bring up. He just wanted Dumbledore to stop talking about Remus before something bad happened.
"I have never learned why he left his safe house," Dumbledore admitted. "The boy left no notes, no clues, as to why he would do such a thing." He paused. "His death hurt you."
Severus hesitated, then nodded once, angling his head down so his hair fell around his face.
Dumbledore leaned forward and reached across his to touch Severus' shoulder lightly. "Think how much more devastating Remus' death might be."
"Shut. Up," Severus uttered, voice barely controlled. "He isn't going to die."
"It is possible," Dumbledore pointed out. "Tom has already made one attempt. If he tries to lure Remus to his side and Remus refuses..." He trailed off.
"No it isn't," Severus insisted adamantly, voice raising. He glared up at Dumbledore. "He promised! He isn't going to die! Shut up!" he yelled, and kicked the desk as hard as he could.
Dumbledore's eyebrows rose. "Promises mean very little when faced with the Killing Curse, Severus. Or worse. We still have no idea what happened to Benjy. Or have you forgotten?"
"Shut up," Severus shouted again, curling in on himself and kicking the desk sharply. "You don't know what will happen! You don't know anything! I won't let it happen!" He kicked the desk again and again, a familiar and utterly humiliating prickling heat starting behind his eyelids. He knew of course that Dumbledore was right, but he didn't want to hear it just then. And he also knew that he would do anything in his power to keep that from happening; he was determined that Remus wouldn't die because of something he had or hadn't done.
After a moment, Dumbledore stood and walked around the desk. He laid his hands on Severus' shoulders. "I know you will do everything in your power to protect him, Severus. As will I. But you must remember to protect him not only from the enemy, but from his friends." The headmaster sighed. "Be very careful, Severus. Be very careful."
"Fuck you, don't touch me," Severus hissed, rising to his feet quickly and stumbling as he pulled away. He turned to try and wipe his eyes as discreetly as possible on his sleeve. "He's the only good thing in my life; I won't give him up."
Dumbledore folded his hands and looked down, his expression sad. "I wasn't asking you to give him up, Severus," he said softly. "If you are determined to continue your relationship with him, I shan't speak of it again. But protect him."
"Bollocks you weren't!" Severus uttered, voice shaky. "Bollocks. Fuck this, I'm leaving." He stomped over to the fireplace and grabbed some Floo powder, refusing to look back at Dumbledore as he tossed it into the fire.
"Mr Snape," Dumbledore called, "five-thirty, Friday."
Severus made a half-strangled noise in acknowledgment of that, then announced his destination and plunged into the Floo.
He stumbled out the other side, struggled out of his robes before he remembered his wand, then Vanished his clothing and found his way through the dark to Remus' bed. He crawled under the covers and put his arms around Remus, breathing unevenly.
Remus hadn't been sleeping very deeply; he'd discovered in the past month that he didn't sleep well if Severus wasn't beside him. He made a noise of acknowledgment when Severus' arms went around him, then when he realised that something was wrong, he turned and wrapped his arms around Severus.
"What is it?" he murmured, his voice husky from sleep. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Severus uttered, even though he knew he was probably obviously upset, but was afraid to voice Dumbledore's doubts aloud to Remus. "I just--I just need you." He shifted closer until their bodies were pressed together in a line, stroking Remus' hip and then his arse, hoping to interest him. "Sorry I couldn't get back any sooner."
"Severus." Remus nuzzled his neck, breathing in his lover's scent. "I'm here." He didn't understand why Severus wouldn't admit something was wrong--because something obviously was--but he would do whatever he could to make Severus feel better. He feathered light kisses up Severus' neck and jaw.
"You--I don't--I'm not any different from when we first started out, am I?" Severus asked, hating himself for being unable to stop thinking of what Dumbledore said. He did not define himself by Remus, and their relationship wasn't unhealthy, and he wasn't bad for Remus. He wasn't going to ruin Remus' life. He wasn't.
"What? No," Remus said, confused. "You're--you're just you, you haven't changed." He kissed Severus briefly.
Oh Merlin, Dumbledore was right. Remus was too good for him. Remus deserved better. They didn't belong together at all, it just wasn't right. Severus put his arms around Remus tightly and held onto him, shivering. It was a fluke, something that had never been meant to happen, and somehow he'd got lucky. He felt as though he were walking on thin ice now; that the universe would seek to right such a mistake, and that Remus might disappear into smoke at any moment. "You can't leave me. Please."
Remus' eyes widened. "God, Severus, what did Dumbledore do to you?" he asked, tightening his arms around him. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm in love with you, remember? That's a condition that generally involves wanting to spend as much time as possible together, often kissing or shagging." He frowned and lowered his head to close his teeth firmly on the spot he'd first marked Severus as his.
Much of the tension drained out of Severus when he felt Remus' teeth, recognizing the claiming gesture on some level. He still felt nervous, but calmer. Remus did want him. He wouldn't have claimed him if he didn't.
"He says I'm no good for you. He says your friends are beginning to ask questions about your changed behavior. He says I'm endangering you by attaching myself to you and that I'm too defensive and fierce and obsessed with our relationship. He says it's unhealthy." Severus hadn't intended to tell Remus any of what Dumbledore had said, but feeling calmer had oddly made him unable to stop the tide of words.
"He what?" Remus growled. "He's got no right! How could he say things like that to you? I told him I couldn't care less what other people think of our relationship! You make me happy!" He pulled away and glared at Severus for a moment, then kissed him fiercely.
Severus let himself be swept up into that kiss, feeling warm and content and safe for Remus' fiercely protective words. He'd never felt so passive before, nor felt the urge to submit so strongly--or at least recognized the urge. It reminded him of that day they'd had the stupid row and Remus had bit him and suddenly he hadn't wanted to argue any longer. "I should have known he wouldn't want me with you. You were always one of his favourites," he murmured.
"Bollocks to that," Remus replied rudely. "As if I should've been. If he liked me, it was only because I was Sirius' paler shadow." His voice was tinged with a little bitterness; he'd not been able to forget Sirius' remarks when they attacked Severus. He nuzzled Severus' neck and licked the skin softly.
Severus' eyelids lowered as he continued to calm. "No, he does like you. He speaks really highly of you. I think he likes you more than them, actually. That's why he doesn't want us together, I think. I'm just this nasty piece of work who's going to drag you down to my level."
Remus snorted. "Right. You heard what he said to me the other day. You honestly think he likes me better?" He sighed, rubbing a hand along Severus' back. "And anyway, I don't care. He doesn't have a right to say those things about you. He's happy enough to have you working for him, isn't he? He can't be all hypocritical and say you're good enough to work for him but not good enough for me to love. That's utter crap."
Severus snorted. "I'm only good enough to work for him because I'm the only Death Eater who will, now Regulus is gone. He says you have a talent for attracting people. He says you don't realize your own appeal...or your power." Severus wasn't certain what Dumbledore had meant by power--if he meant his power of attraction, or strength, or something else, he didn't know.
"There, that just proves he's talking rubbish," Remus said. "I don't attract people; most people don't even notice me. That's part of what made you so interesting to me, when we were in school, you know. You noticed me. You followed me. Most people wouldn't have bothered. It made me curious about you." He licked at Severus' earlobe. "I'm glad you did," he added, his breath warm against Severus' ear.
Severus didn't want to argue the point if Remus thought it made him different that he had noticed him (even if he thought that many more people noticed Remus than Remus thought). "Mmm, me too," he murmured. "Love you."
"I love you, too, Severus," Remus whispered. "And I always will, no matter what Dumbledore says, or any of my friends, or anything. We belong together."
"Yes," Severus uttered, relieved. "Good. I'm so glad I'm yours."
"Me, too," Remus agreed, and kissed him. "D'you still want me to misbehave tonight?" he asked eventually, smiling a little slyly though Severus probably couldn't see it in the darkness.
"Mmm, if you're not too tired," Severus said, mood improving even more at the idea of Remus misbehaving. "I don't want to deprive you of sleep."
"I wouldn't choose sleep over misbehaving with you," Remus assured him. He nipped lightly at Severus' neck, one hand sliding down to the small of his back.
"Nnn, well, that's good for me, because I want you," Severus murmured, pleased, arching his head back and smoothing a hand over Remus' back.
"Yeah? How d'you want me?" Remus asked, nibbling his way down to Severus' collarbone. "Want me to claim you? Show you how much I love touching you? Want to fuck me?" He ran his hand down to stroke the soft skin where Severus' arse curved away from his back.
Severus shivered, reacting to Remus' words as much as his touches. "Claim me," he uttered softly.
Remus smiled hungrily. "All right. I love doing that." He nipped Severus' skin again, lightly, then lifted his head to smile down at Severus through the dim light. "I like showing you how much you are to me. You're my world." He slid his fingers down a little further, then stroked back up, running his fingers across all the skin he could reach.
Severus gasped softly, feeling so warm and content and aroused. He smiled faintly though he wasn't certain Remus saw it; he could only make out dim shapes himself.
"Love you," Remus whispered, leaning down to kiss Severus slowly and carefully. He pushed aside his anger at Dumbledore and concentrated on showing Severus how precious he was to Remus.
"Mmm, love you too." Merlin, Severus was so lucky, and he knew it. It was amazing to think that Remus wanted him, out of everyone in the world, everyone he could have. He brushed his fingers through Remus' hair, enjoying Remus' tenderness.
Remus ran his fingers down to brush Severus' erection, curling gently around him and stroking. "My Severus."
"Ohhh," Severus murmured, breath hitching. "God, Remus. Love you." He felt like he'd said that a dozen times tonight, and resolved not to say it again, because he'd already been much more needy and angsty than he'd have liked. But still, it was true, and Remus just made him happy.
Remus hummed, smiling, and leaned in to nip gently at Severus' mouth. "Those are my favourite words," he whispered. He rolled over on top of Severus, resting some of his weight on him. "You're mine."
Severus automatically slid his arms around Remus, enjoying that weight. "Oh yes."
Dipping his head to nibble at Severus' throat, Remus nestled his cock alongside Severus' and stroked them both lightly. "You make me so hard."
Groaning, Severus arched and shivered. "Yes, nnn, Remus. Love it when you say things like that."
"Yeah?" Remus licked his skin, delighted. "Had to wank after you left, thinking about you. I missed you so much. All I could think of was you coming home so I could fuck you." He stroked a little faster, still trying to use only light pressure.
"Ah! Oh my god, Remus!" That image was just brilliant. Severus was glad Remus was touching him so lightly; usually he hated being teased, but tonight he didn't want to come too soon. Especially when Remus was talking like this.
Remus growled, pleased that he was getting such a good reaction from Severus. "Want to lick you everywhere," he murmured, his breath hitching in his chest. "Want to make you mine all over again." He squeezed a little, then loosened his grip again. "Want to make you moan."
"Ohh, yes," Severus repeated, feeling a bit foolish for not managing anything better than that. He writhed happily. "You could make me do anything if you keep talking like that," he murmured.
Remus chuckled, warm and low. "That's such a tempting idea," he said, nibbling up Severus' neck again. "Just by telling you things like the fact I can never decide whether to push you against something and fuck you hard or stroke you and suck you until you're begging me for it?" He released their cocks and slid his hand down to curl under Severus' balls, rolling them gently.
"Ahh! Yes, like that!" Arching, Severus watched Remus through heavy-lidded eyes, breath coming faster and uneven.
"God, you're gorgeous like that," Remus said, staring at him with a smile on his face. "Watching me, wanting me. That look makes me so desperate for you, Severus." He bore down with his hips, rolling his erection against Severus'. "Need you."
Severus groaned at that contact. "I need you," he insisted, reaching out to brush his fingertips over one of Remus' nipples. "Need you to take me. Want to give you pleasure."
Gasping at the flash of pleasure that sent through him, Remus slid his fingers further down to circle Severus' opening. "You do," he groaned. "You give me so much pleasure. God, I desire you so much. You're so incredible." He needed his wand, but he'd have to stop touching Severus... "Where's your wand, Severus? Do the spells so I don't have to stop touching you. Want to touch you all over."
Severus moaned softly, shifting under Remus' touch. His wand was...somewhere...how was he always losing it? Some bloody wizard he was. He turned his head and remembered he'd set it on the bedside stand; he reached out and Summoned it nonverbally, then did the charm for Remus, groaning softly when it took.
"Yeah," Remus whispered, leaning up to pant in Severus' ear. "Feels good, doesn't it? You can't wait to have me inside, can you?" He licked the edge of Severus' ear and groaned. "Can't wait to be inside you." He shifted between Severus' legs as he slid one finger in.
That made Severus moan, arching as he felt a finger breach him. He shifted and spread his legs, bending his knees to change the angle of his hips. "Merlin, yes, want you," he gasped desperately.
"You're so fucking hot," Remus growled in his ear. He pressed his finger in further, wanting to have Severus gasping with pleasure. "Love you."
"Yes," Severus whimpered, trying to bear down on Remus' finger. He clenched his hand in Remus' hair, panting.
"Mmm, want more?" Remus asked, nipping Severus' skin. He could hardly stand to hold back; he wasn't going to last.
"God yes, Remus," Severus burst out, "more! Please, more!"
Growling in his own desperation, Remus slid his finger out and replaced it with his cock, pressing inside with one swift thrust. He groaned and tried to control himself, but he wanted Severus too badly now; he thrust again, snaking his arm under Severus' hips to pull them closer together.
Severus cried out for the unexpectedness that lent even more pleasure to that first thrust, as well as not being given time to adjust before Remus thrust again. Merlin, Remus was the sexiest thing in the entire world. His inner muscles clenched around Remus involuntarily and he clung on tightly to Remus as his hips were lifted, wrapping his legs around Remus' hips. "Oh fuck, good!"
"God, love you, need you!" Remus gasped, giving up the idea of control. "So good, Severus, destroy my control, need you so much!" His words and breathing were as ragged as his movements, but there was no denying the depth of feeling behind them.
Severus groaned, eyes closing as he felt Remus' thrusts shake his core, sending pleasure dancing through him.
Remus slid his hand down around Severus' cock, not stroking but letting their movement guide his hand along it. "You--you're mine--Severus--" he declared.
"Oh yes, Remus, yours," Severus hissed, arching though the pressure on his cock was very light. "Always yours!"
"Always mine!" Remus agreed, shifting the angles of his thrusts just a bit as he tightened his hand on Severus' cock. "Want to make you happy. Want to make you come."
"Yes, yes!" Severus opened his eyes wide and cried out as he felt a strong jolt of pleasure from Remus' thrusts, and then another and another. He felt himself suddenly thrust to the edge of his climax, breathing hard and ragged. "Fuck--keep--" A few more thrusts like that, and then he squeezed his cock, and he was coming hard, black spots dancing across his vision.
"God, yes," Remus gasped, trying to smile as he gasped and kept moving, gazing down at Severus hungrily. The open expression on his lover's face was so addictive. Remus dropped kisses on Severus' forehead and cheeks, whispering his name. He was so close, it was so perfect--
"Oh, love you," Severus gasped, holding Remus close as his breathing slowly began to relax. He smiled, then leaned in and kissed Remus, nipping his lower lip.
"Yes, love you," Remus whispered, and the small twinge of pain was enough to overwhelm his senses. He cried out and tensed as he came, repeating Severus' name and clinging to him.
Severus let out a soft noise at the feel of Remus' release, stroking his lover's hair as he came down.
Remus draped himself over Severus, trying to keep from leaning too heavily on him but unable to move away. "God, I love you so much," he whispered raggedly. "I'd die before anyone could take you from me."
"Love you too," Severus uttered, relaxing but not letting go of Remus. "I don't ever want you to go."
"Severus," Remus breathed, smiling faintly. "You're so good for me."
Severus brushed Remus' hair out of his eyes, watching him warmly.
Remus blinked at Severus, his eyelids heavy with contentment. He leaned down to kiss him, then finally shifted his weight from Severus and snuggled next to him, resting his head on Severus' shoulder.
Severus smiled and let his eyes close. He felt so much better now.
"Love you, Severus," Remus said, his voice very soft.
"Love you," Severus whispered back.