vallo

I do not know really what is happening with all of the plants and such but I do know that Laszlo is an incredible topiary artist. This is a man who knows his way around a good bush, what a good bush looks like, and how to manipulate it to do things you would never think would be possible. If anyone needs a bush trimmed or shaped or worked on, Laszlo has only the firmest of appreciation for bushes.

Also VERY IMPORTANT and more important than whatever is happening with the plants is that we have a new dolly!!!! Nadja doll is THRILLED to have a friend but completely coincidentally now our house is very haunted. VERY haunted. Laszlo is complaining about them very much and we VERY OBVIOUSLY do not deal with the G-individual (even thinking it makes blood pour from my eyes) so someone UNRELATED to that come and get rid of these ghosts for us.

OH YES AND ALSO MORE IMPORTANT we are in need of documentary crew members ONCE AGAIN to follow us around with the cameras and the fuzzy...stick and ask questions and record our day to day lives that are VERY interesting apply now.

[ FILTERED TO CAROL, WANDA, & GAMORA ]
i have spent the last day sobering up and reflecting on my actions over the last couple of days.

i was foolish. and rash. and very emotional. the raincloud following me around gave that part away, i suppose. but i apologize to all of you because i realize after jacob's lecture that i was being selfish and entitled and that you are all very good people that were only trying to help.

so i have killed a few boars for you and your families in penance and am working on cooking the meat as i speak. i will come visit your homes shortly with my apologies in person, unless you would prefer i never speak to you again!

[ FILTERED TO OLDER THOR'S FAMILY & FRIENDS ]
hello. thank you for your hospitality, but i am feeling very useless and that is not a great feeling. SO! are there any blood feuds that i can help? quests? duties of older me?

So, last night I was running from werewolves and like... hunter... guys... with guns?? And today I'm in another, more magical dimension (???)

So that's cool. Super cool. The coolest. Hey everyone, how's it going? I'm Dylan. I am not magical. (Unless...????)

You know, if I had a dollar for every time there was a timeline in which my castle was stolen from me and I was pushed out or killed... I'd have two dollars.

That doesn't seem like a lot but that's so weird that it happened twice as far as I know.

THAT BEING SAID, I should probably get better wards for the castle just because I had some geese get in easily and grab my knives. Anyone wanna come help?

I went to the cellar with a few adequate enough bottles from local Vallo vineyards to attempt the beginning of restocking what I had absconded with from myself and ( cut for image! )

Thank you, Vallo. Several bottles include good years of Solvia Groves Diamond Plum Wine as well as some rice wine from Rosohna that I have not had since dropping here three years ago, and so I am pleased. I am also changing the physical locks and the wards. Perhaps it is time for heightened spellwork, to protect against myself. Caleb, I need all of our oil and any unenchanted rod we have hidden away. And Gilmore, fair warning, I am coming to buy all of your incense and string.

So.


Who's hungry?

New Asgard is under attack.

The geese return and they return with a vengeance. If you are uninjured from yesterday's events and are not under siege from these geese yourself, please come assist. The helhounds and fighters in the village are holding them at bay for now, but their numbers seem to be increasing.

Shiro, I am rerouting half of Team B to assist here, but the rest are on their regular patrol shifts and picking up the slack of those in New Asgard or elsewhere.

EDIT 1: THEY ARE ARMED WITH A FLAMETHROWER AND KNIVES AND HAVE INCREASED IN NUMBERS EXPONENTIALLY. AIR SUPPORT AND WATER TYPES, REQUESTED.

EDIT 2: DAUD DO NOT RETURN TO YOUR DWELLING. IT IS NO LONGER A DWELLING, BUT AN ENEMY STRONGHOLD.

EDIT 3: THE STABLES ARE GONE. AS IS THE COMMUNITY GARDEN. TORUNN HOLDS STRONG AT THE BELL TOWER AND DAUD FIGHTS FIERCELY FOR THE VILLAGE SCHOOL.

EDIT 4: PEACE WAS NEVER AN OPTION. TALKS OF A TRUCE HAVE FAILED.

UH, HELLO!

I hate to alarm people but I feel like you should also know that the geese are back. Those geese. If you're new since then, you're about to learn.

Also some of them stole my knives. That's the part that might alarm. If anyone can help get them back though that would be gr-- wrong priorities

FEN

I've been Today was a lot but this shit is ending soon it feels so before

Hi.



Oh, uh. It's Vax? I don't know if this thing says that.

[OOC - Please note that in any visuals, Essek has longer hair and an eyepatch over his left eye with visible scarring on that side of his face/ear/head k ty bye.]

This is so awkwa Figured out time travel, but did not plan how to

Hello. It feels odd to introduce myself as many of you already know me, but I am Essek Widogast and I'm here with Caleb (also) Widogast. If my husband's perfect recall can be relied upon, which I am willing to stake most everything on it, the versions of us that you know normally should still be deep within the Aeor that was brought to Vallo, being very much themselves while surrounded by ancient Exandrian magic and technology.

Which is to say, and I'm doing a poor job of getting to the point, we are from a different timeline and time. A few hours ago, we were in 2033 within a branch of the future that is hopefully not your own. The Temporal Concurrence and the aligning of the leylines does, it seem, allow for some otherwise so-called impossible magic when one(s) puts many months of work into entirely too many sleepless nights their wizard mind(s) to it.

I cannot promise to keep a long story short as there are many moving parts and I tend to be accidentally verbose in the best of times, but I think many of you may remember the attack from Interitus that happened in August of 2021. He was not as gone as we had all hoped and is now wreaking havoc upon my and Caleb's timeline. Thanks to the concurrence and the influx of magic, our intel is advising that he is planning on ascending beyond his current form into something akin to godhood. Should he do so, his powers will be made more or less limitless and there will be no stopping him from traveling freely within timelines to destroy every version of Vallo, as has been his will all along. Our version has just been practice for him.

As for why we have broken through literal time and space to visit the past, we are seeking aid. This has already been discussed with the DOA, but there are a few things that we are here for specifically.

First, Interitus is using a simulacrum of sorts as a power focus, which has allowed him to bide his time in our world and eventually build up enough power in secret to take over. We believe that this simulacrum had already arrived in March of 2023--in February, specifically. We do not know where, but our hope is that you fine people will be able to locate and destroy it, specifically at the height of the concurrence to not give away our plans.

Second, Caleb and I are in search of a very specific tome from the Great Library. We unfortunately do not have access to the Library in our time as you do now, but we believe that the tome we are looking for has information regarding locating the object needed to pierce through Interitus's magical defenses. If any librarian friends are willing to volunteer to help with that, as we do need this before we return to our time tomorrow, it would be greatly appreciated.

Finally, and I realize that this is the largest ask of them all, a vision from one of the Prigany psychics has shown us that there are specific people in the future that aid in the efforts. Our understanding is that these people come to us from your timeline and travel to our own. We have a list of those people, who I will be filtering separately with more information. Please know there is no expectation. We are not here to force anyone to help, regardless of psychic visions.

This is long and a great deal of information for a Monday, I understand. Caleb and I are here to answer any questions that we can--at least those questions that do not pose more harm to the timelines than our being here already might.

FILTER TO AURORA MORNINGSTAR, BILLY KAPLAN, BO DENNIS, COBB VANTH, DANIEL ARLINGTON, GALADRIEL HIGGINS, GANSEY, GLADIO AMICITIA, IRIS AMICITIA, KATOU YUE, KELLACH DONNALLEN, KRATOS, LAN XICHEN, LILA PITTS, LYDIA MARTIN, ORYM, OSTYIA RABALSKA, REMUS LUPIN, ROGIER, SAM WILSON, SARA LANCE, STEVE HARRINGTON, TALLY CRAVEN, TENNAL HALKANA, THOM SUMMER, TYLER LOCKWOOD, VEX'AHLIA + CALEB WIDOGAST

( OOC cut because I know this is getting long I AM SORRY. )

The message is a liiiiittle late but HAPPY WOMEN'S MONTH, VALLO! Is it a thing in Vallo? I don't know but my best friend Josh told me that it was a thing on Earth and honestly, it should totally be a thing in Vallo too. Just saying.

Speaking of, what would be the reaction if I was to say that there might be a Women's Day brunch held at Castle Whitespire in celebration for it? Maaaaybe this Saturday so it wouldn't entirely be last minute? Because last minute would be holding it on Wednesday but since tomorrow is the full moon, there is no way in hell I'm going to be in any condition to host anything in the next two days.

Hellooo Vallo

Did you know it's mine and my sisters birthday? Because it is and you should all wish us happy birthday because we're 30 now and gods how the FUck did that happen


And while youre here, look at these exs excce exceptna great people: ( cut for a bunch of pictures )

Ok if I did not picture you and we're friends, please know it's not because we're not friends. it's just because someone just put a shot down and i have to go

PS i love you, outlanders, thanks for (almost for me) three years

I have had the pleasure of free soup at Soups, Soups, Soups, Soups for a month now--eleven more to go--and I have no eaten enough soup to feel that I have a solid opinion on which are the best, at least according to my own personal tastes. As such, I have an official ranking, of which you need to listen to my most recent podcast to hear about.

That attempt at a cliffhanger is also an attempt at marketing. Let me know if it works.

Other topics beyond soup for this most recent episode include: a frankly fascinating conversation with our Angroboda about magic, particularly her brand of it, and also an overview regarding this world's upcoming Temporal Concurrence, including what it is and what it might mean for any of us.

Anyway, it has been a while since I talked about the podcast, so here I am, doing that. You're welcome, Blue.

Well then.

Some of you types more sensitive to the coming and goings of the world may have felt something a bit off this morning when you rose. Moreso than usual I would suppose. It would seem Vallo has expanded its collection of Hells to include my domain.

And before you ask, no I did not ask for or summon it here. I'm sure some of you nerds enjoy bringing your work home with you but have you seen that throne? I'm lucky not to have a flat arse after all these centuries.

Right. I would advise any of you feeling guilt over that muffin you cheated with this morning to stuff it in the bag with the discarded wrappings and dispose of the lot. Also keep an eye on dead bodies...except vampires and zombies. I think. I suppose they are fairly similar concepts to demons possessing the dead...

In other words, please do not poke the Hell if you can help it and should you need any assistance with its presence causing issue, myself or Rory would be best to ask.

[RORY]

Perhaps I should have asked before volunteering but knowing this lot and their penchant for wining, dining, and trying to mount trouble, I will need all the help I can get with someone familiar with the place.

How late is too late to continue to say Happy New Year? Asking for a friend.

I got super busy with turning the castle into a venue and keeping a business going (and you know.. learning along the way too), that I have been slacking so much on my YouTube channel. You would think I'd have a wide variety to talk about between lycanthropy and making knives and just general Fen-related questions but I have absolutely hit a wall and don't know what to write. :( :(

Anyone got suggestions for YouTube topics? Or what to do when you hit some kind of mental block?


Oh, yeah, also YAY VALLO TEAM for getting rid of those mushrooms, seriously.

OH HELLO, have we missed Krampus because of You-Know-What-Mas? I have told him time and time again, could you perhaps not pick another month?? So that there are no silent nights (although they should not be so silent if you're doing it right if you know what I mean) or ho--I cannot even type the word without my fingers starting to bleed but the other kind of night or the manger thing. THE NIGHT IS MEANT TO BE OUR SANCTUARY.

(Guillermo, go and do a check on the entire place to make sure there are no surprise You-Know-What-Mas things around so we don't have to worry about starting on fire)

But yes, Krampus is an old friend!!! Well, I suppose Laszlo met him first--his whole whipping deal was very appealing to him obviously, but you know what they say about never meeting your heroes? It was a bit like that. Not disappointing, but. You expect one thing and get another. Nice creature! Probably good whipping.

Hello, Vallo! Castle Whitespire's great halls are totally available now for big party rentals and such. I may have also renovated a few rooms for sleeping off anything too. Never realized how much needed to be cleaned up and all but damn, did some places bring back memories. Not all of them that good though

The rentals also will come with some great catering deals because Sophie is the absolute best. I might even offer to do a hefty discount for anyone who wants to book for the winter holidays too!

EVERYONE PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD

Jackie Daytona, American Yankee Doodle Dandy, salt of the earth, volleyball aficionado, and, he would want me to stress this because it is the most important part, REGULAR HUMAN BARTENDER is now.........A POTTED PLANT

ALSO PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THIS NEXT PART BECAUSE IT IS PERHAPS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT I JUST SAID

and I have been having a very passionate, intimate, and carnal affair with him!!!!!!!!!! Was it the blue jeans? The toothpick? His remarkable accent from Arizonya Arizon Aryzynya Arizoninaia a place? Or the sheer and absolute lust between us? We may never know, the hormones want what the hormones want and as we all know I am irresistible with my pheromones and my singing and my bosom and even though I had to talk of human things such as pizza and it being wine o'clock somewhere (the actual fuck that means, I do not know) and how leggings are in fact pants (??????????) NOW IT IS OVER BECAUSE HE IS A PLANT!!!!!!

I AM GRIEVING.

Hello, people of Vallo. My name is Verin Thelyss and I am looking for my brother, Essek. He is approximately as tall as my shoulders, floats, and his face usually looks like this



If you've seen him, let me know, please and thank you.

I have no idea what's going on here but I know my little niece was with me and now she's not. I'll do whatever you want if you give her back to me. She's practically my little sister and my big sister will kill me if I lost her daughte

Please. I just want Monique back.