vallo

I woke up to a post it note from my older self saying I owe the kids brunch for being "what THEY would say an embarrassment, but don't listen to them".

So come get your waffles and bacon I guess?

That moment when you get unceremoniously dumped into the past and you text the love of your life to find out what's up and you get "FUNNY STORY..."

Anyways I need 2K.

Bells Hells

I'm coming home but Ashton has to promise to NEVER have Pappy Chet look at me and say 'who's your daddy' EVER AGAIN.

BELLS HELLS

fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCKING FUCK

Okay I don't know what the FUCK is going on but I saw some ghost lady literally fucking spider crawl across the ceiling in the hallway and I think somewhere in Exandria Laudna is pissed at me because the hall is now fucked to shit thanks to hammer swings and also I took a chunk out of your door, Chetney, and I'm not sorry because holy shit I was not ready for this today.

Anyway, watch out for ghosts or something.

I was just with Dorian. We'd been back from camping for maybe an hour before I stopped in the office to pick some stuff up.

He can't Everything is so wrong back home and I don't even know if he's safe or if What if he's I can't do this ag

This is fucked.

That could have been worse, so I won't complain.

Er, not because I searched anything worse? I guess? Just--you know, nevermind.

For anyone curious or interested, my searches did come up with good results and I'm going to be going to beginner aerial silk classes on Mondays from 4:30-5:30PM and beginner pole dancing classes from 6-7PM on Fridays, both at Spin Sisters Studio in the city. Pretty reasonably priced, all told. I wouldn't mind company, since both of these things are very new to me and it would be fun to go through it with someone else.

[OOC: Posted around 4:30PM Vallo time, an hour after the blackout.]



Hello, testing the network? We've been told that it has been restored, so please chime in if you see this.

In case it's working: from what we've been told, there was a widespread power outage across all of Vallo. Communication was key to restore first, but work is being done to fix the rest of the electricity by the experts. No ETA just yet on when it will be back up, but the word is that it may take some time as the source of the outage has yet to be pinpointed.

We are working on putting together basic supplies to help, in case this goes into the night. Feel free to stop by the DOA, as we've got some candles, flashlights, blankets, easy to prep food, and such here to hand out.

BELLS HELLS

Are you all okay? I guess this isn't that different than home, but I wanted to check in since we've gotten kind of used to modern conveniences and all.

SENDING STONE TO DORIAN

Hey, you okay? Check the network or just let me know here. I know you're probably fine, but you know that I worry. Love you.

A new weapon showed up in my apartment today. It's called the Pick Axe of Despair. Yeah, I know, it's Edgelord for days, but I didn't name it and I don't want to know what happens if I don't call it by whatever is etched into the handle.

Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that I am absolute shit using this weapon and would like to learn how to wield it so I don't look like a flailing sideways windmill.

Look.

I know there's ways to make this whole fucking paralyzed-by-a-basilisk-shithead thing go away, but I won't pretend I know much about magic to actually know how that shit works, so if anyone can point me in a direction, I would really like to use my arm again. It's kind of dead weight right now, which does mean it's kind of great to swing around as a club when you take down the basilisk-shithead that did it to you in the first place, but my body is enough without pretty sure this is going to get fucking old fucking quick.

Oh and thanks in advance, all that.

Also, people that have the joy of living with me, there's a dead basilisk in our backyard. You're fucking welcome.

Somewhere between my birthday earlier in the week and it being September already, I've been a little nostalgic the last couple of days. It was my second birthday that I've gotten to celebrate here in Vallo (38, before anyone asks) and the sheer amount of stuff that has happened to me and change that I've felt personally is pretty wild to think back on.

It was nearly a year ago that some of us had that wild adventure with cultists and rocket launchers and monsters. I went to hell, traveled in time, spent a week stressing folks out as a child, fought a whole slew of creatures through defense patrols, got my first job that wasn't mercenary work since I was a guard in my hometown, kissed a handsome man for the first time in seven years (which I think was well received, judging from near eleven months later), and just met so many new, great people. I know that things are their own shade of uh terrible? awful? fucked up? eventful back home, thanks to Vallo gifting me the occasional check-in, but quite the ride when you spent several years just coasting.

Anyway, sorry. This is a lot and I usually don't like talking this much, but here's to another year, I suppose. Maybe with less fighting bad guys? We'll see.



Also, to the people who live with me: I told Laudna when my the tree from Zephrah first arrived that we could decorate it come autumn in a seasonally appropriate and spooky way. I know she isn't here to appreciate it, but I still want to honor that for her, if any of you want to join me in getting some decorations.

Coming at you all real hot with some more satisfying jif gefs aw shit things.

( Obviously this is not Chetney but you know, theater of the mind )

Can't show too much on account of I don't want to take away from the hashtag wolfpack in my DMs.

I say be the satisfying thing you want to see in the world.

Said that about thirst traps yesterday. Don't know which one is more poignant.

Anyway, show me some of the shit you're making, c'mon now. Doesn't have to be wood. Wood is preferred, but I got a lot of respect for the entire crafting line. Long as you make it with your hands, long as you had a good time, you were successful. Don't let no one take that shit from you.

EXANDRIANS

Good fucking morning, I remember more from home and I'm including all of you because I don't know who does and doesn't give a shit.

( Cut for spoilers through CR C3E63 if you're worried about that! )

Hey saw a bunch of people getting arrested while I was in the city getting some fucking snack groceries because Chetney ate all the beef jerky AGAIN. Looked real intense and shit.

The arrests, not the jerky aisle.



Also before anyone says it: I WASN'T INVOLVED. I was at the fucking grocery store. I've got an alibi, damn it.

Happy birthday, Lance. Even if you lock me in jail cells, you're still pretty cool.

Bonfire on Lance's tropical island (because Vallo clearly has favorites) this evening to celebrate. Everyone's welcome but you have to smash a bit of cake in Lance's face if you show up.

Sorry, that's the rules. 🤷🏻

One thing I love about this place is how we all bring a little bit of our own homes to make this neat sort of melting pot of a community, letting other people experience the things we might have really loved before being brought here. It's nice, getting to celebrate other worlds that most of us will probably never get to see, outside of through the eyes of other Outlanders.

All that to say, thanks for the races this weekend. It was a blast.

DORIAN

I've decided I want to use my winnings on something fun. Want to get fancy?

Alright, tell me something about yourself that might surprise someone to know.

And I don't mean some kind of big fucking secret about how much of a piece of shit you were back in your home or something like that, because I don't really give a crap about anything like that. I want to hear about some kind of surprising talent that people wouldn't peg you for or something cool you did as a kid or about your pet guinea pig or I don't know, fucking good stuff like that.

Come at me. Blow my fucking socks off, let's go.

A woman is walking alone at night when suddenly a rogue appears. He kills her and steals three things: her mobile phone, her watch, and her purse.

What did the rogue take first?

BELLS HELLS

Hey, I'm sorry that I didn't do this right away yesterday, but I needed a little time to sort of think everything through and get my thoughts in order. Again, I'm sorry but I hope you'll understand.

( Cut for CR spoilers, in case you're worried about that! )

alright I got news for you weirdos. did a favor for a guy with a horse's ass and it turns out he's got this old radio station out in the woods. he says I can play some music if I fix it up. and bring my own chair of course. so outlander radio is coming to you starting tomorrow. no you can't make requests. you can tune in to 90.9 and hear the good stuff or you can listen to your own goddamn music. won't make any difference to me.

ETA: scratch that it's playing now. freaking enjoy.

( PLAYLIST SAMPLES & PLAYLIST LINK )