STEV.
You can tell me. Anytime. Whatever it feels like, even if you think it's the most terrible thing ever, you can tell me okay? I've got your back, Stan. No judgement, no worry about making all of it worse for me.
I haven't told anyone either. Like you, I can't. I think, fuck, sometimes I think I left part of my soul or some shit down there and I don't even know what that means. I just try not to think about it a lot, pretend like everything's okay.