WHAT: Temeraire is reuinted with his captain, but doesn't understand why he can't stay WHERE: Wild Vallo Outlander Encampment WHEN: March 29th, after the rescuing of the Outlander prisoners WARNINGS: Some angst STATUS: Complete
There were few times when Laurence had been more pleased to see Temeraire than when he’d swooped out of the sky into the Treant encampment to free them, and Laurence had wasted very little time before he’d jumped into Temeraire’s waiting claws, letting the talons close up over his head before they’d gone aloft again.
It had been a relief to see Temeraire again, though it had only been two days since the last he’d seen him. To see Temeraire, and to see him doing well, although he’d not quite prepared himself for how protective the dragon would be, once Laurence had been rescued. It had been easy to forget that, though he’d only seen Temeraire the day before yesterday, it had been years since the last time this Temeraire had seen Laurence.
Some selfish part of Laurence thought it might have been for the best. He’d seen Lan Xichen, had seen him thriving in this land, but he’d been ill prepared for how much it would hurt when Lan Xichen had only smiled at him in confused politeness when Laurence had greeted him warmly: he did not know him.
And so Laurence would have to be content to watch his husband – not his husband, except in another life – from afar, as he set about the task of scrubbing Temeraire’s smooth scales with cloth and water. It felt good, at least, to do something active after the nearly two days imprisonment in the Treant camp.
“Will you tell me, a little, of your life here?” Laurence asked.
It was very nice to be bathed, Temeraire had to admit, but that was nothing - oh, nothing - to having Laurence back, after so very long. He had been starting to lose hope of ever seeing him again and then, suddenly, here he was, looking so very well, if a little different, in unfamiliar clothes. It had been quite all he could do to remember the plan, and to fly away with his rescued cargo rather than stay and tear apart all the evil trees he could with tooth and claw and the Divine Wind.
He thought he was well within his rights to insist on keeping Laurence close now, particularly when he was perfectly aware of all the dangers that lurked outside of the mountain encampments and Laurence was not.
“It is mostly boring,” he said, keeping one eye on Laurence as best he could as he moved around his head. “Once in a while there will be a good battle, but there is not much society at all, and nothing so civilised as government. I have helped improve the living conditions for those who live up here,” he added, not wanting to sound at all indolent, “by enlarging some caves and moving boulders and such that were in the way, and there are people who like to shelter in my cave, which I have made quite fine.” He was aware that it did not sound very impressive, but as usual when he did not have Laurence, he had been largely depressed and indifferent to his own happiness, and being focused on mundane tasks was one way to relieve the low aching feeling that something vitally important was missing. “I will be honest,” he said after a while. “I have not been quite so miserable anywhere since Pen Y Fan, and I have missed you almost as much as when I thought you were dead. I am so very very glad you are here, even if it is selfish, when it is so dangerous.”
“It isn’t selfish, dear heart,” Laurence said, laying a hand on Temeraire’s side. “I was without you for some time, in the Vallo I have come from, and I would have traded near enough anything to have had you back with me. And it is very good what you’ve been doing for people here. They must be grateful, very grateful indeed, to have someone with your size and strength to help them make comfortable living quarters.” He sighed, and rested his forehead against Temeraire’s hide. “I do wish I could remain here with you, once our mission here is complete.”
“Why can’t you?” Temeraire asked, bristling all over immediately. “You need not go anywhere, from what I can see, although,” he added grimly. “I suppose it would be quite easy for this place to take you away again whenever it should like; oh, it is very cruel. I do not like having an enemy I cannot fight in any way, not even with diplomacy.”
Laurence frowned. He’d known, of course, that Temeraire would not take the news well. Especially not with their inauspicious reunion. He dipped the cloth back into the water, and began to carefully scrub around and under one of Temeraire’s scales, as much to attempt to sooth him as it was to clean the dirt from it.
“Because, my dear, there is another Temeraire back in the Vallo that I come from, and I am his captain,” he said gently. “I’ve come here to rescue him, you see, and it would do no good at all if I came all this way to rescue him, only to not return back home with him.”
He considered, briefly, telling Temeraire that he was married, too; he did not think that the dragon had noticed the ring on his finger, and was not surprised by it, considering how small said ring was compared to Temeraire’s prodigious size, but decided that it was best not to. It had taken some time for his own Temeraire to warm up to the idea of his getting married, and that Temeraire had been quite fond of Lan Xichen already. There would be no simple way to convince this Temeraire to come around in the time allotted to them, especially when he was not sure what the dragon’s relationship was to Lan Xichen. “But I will hope, I will hope very much, that your captain will come to you soon enough. Vallo is nearly as likely to give us what we want as it is to take away.”
Temeraire was confused by this, but not as confused as he was furious. “Well, this other Temeraire is quite selfish then,” he muttered, leaning into Laurence’s hand as much as he could without pushing him over. It seemed like such a long time since he had been bathed, and his hide was filthy with mountain earth and grit. He was painfully aware that his wings were ragged and he did not have any of his nice things; no wonder Laurence should prefer the other Temeraire. “Except, I suppose I could not look after you very well if you were always here,” he sighed heavily. Laurence was dressed quite nicely, despite his recent imprisonment, if somewhat differently than he was used to. “But it still does not seem very fair.”
“Oh Temeraire. Oh, my dear,” Laurence murmured, abandoning, for the moment, his efforts to clean the dragon in favour of just offering him what comfort he could, leaning back against the dragon and laying his cheek against his hide. “It is not at all fair. Not at all fair.” He wished there were something he could do, some way he could both stay behind with him, and go home to his own family. It was impossible.
“I do not doubt that you would do a very fine job of taking care of me, were I here. You mustn’t think that you would not, or that that is why I cannot remain. It is only… It is only that I am not from this world, dear heart, and I cannot remain. If there were a way, somehow…”
“But there is not… so there is little point in dwelling on it,” Temeraire said, with about as much conviction as he really felt, which was none. He had developed pragmatism in this place out of necessity, but it was one thing to know something to be true and another to feel it and to accept it fully. He suddenly almost wished Laurence had not come at all, so he would not have to know the joy of it now, and have to lose it later. But only almost. “How long will you stay?” he asked, very low.
“I cannot know,” Laurence said, equally low. “Not long, I think. A few days longer. We’ve come to collect the creature that has been causing these portals, and once we’ve captured it, we will need to bring it home.” He felt wretched, saying it. “But I promise, Temeraire, I will not leave your side until it is necessary to do so.”
Perhaps – but no. Even could this Temeraire come through the portal with him – and he doubted, very much, that such a thing hadn’t been tried any of the other times that they’d gone to these other Vallos – he could not fit. Laurence had not seen a portal yet that could accommodate a twenty-tonne dragon, and this Temeraire had no amulet of shapeshifting to make such a thing possible.
Temeraire could not deny it was painfully disappointing that Laurence could only stay so short a time, but, he reasoned a little begrudgingly, Laurence would surely be safer somewhere else. Temeraire could hunt, but he saw how badly the people here yearned for better comforts than just a full belly; a lot of them were quite ragged, and they did not always smell good either. He wanted Laurence to be healthy and safe, even if it meant they could not be together. ”Then we shall make the most of the time,” he said, nuzzling Laurence’s side. “Are you hungry? It is hard to find game, with the forest so thick, but there is plenty of fish if you fly out far enough.”
Laurence smiled, glad that Temeraire seemed at least a little his old self. He knew what a bitter disappointment it must have been for him to know that Laurence would leave soon, but Laurence was proud, very proud, at how maturely Temeraire was handling the news. He resisted the impulse to assure Temeraire that his own captain would find him soon; it was nothing but an empty hope, with no real basis in reality, except for Laurence's belief that they would always find one another, regardless of the universe.
“I would be happy to go fishing with you,” Laurence said, warmly. “Please. And perhaps once we've eaten, we might find a lake that you consider safe, and I might give you a proper cleaning.”
“Oh. Temeraire shuddered a little with pleasure at the idea, although he was still less enthusiastic than he might have been a few minutes earlier. “I would like that, if there is time. I know you have work to do. I would like to help, if I can.”
“I will make time,” Laurence promised, fiercely. If there was nothing else he could do for Temeraire, then he could, at least, be sure that he was properly clean before he set out home again. “And I think you could help quite a bit. You and I could make aerial sweeps to see if we might find the creature, I think, or to at least keep an eye on the group that ventures into the forest for it.”
“Of course,” Temeraire said. “It is quite safe in the air, even above the forest; it is only when one tries to land that the trees become troublesome.” This was a bit of an understatement, but he did not want to linger on the scrapes he had gotten into of late which would likely only worry Laurence. Anyway the rescue in the forest had rather gotten his blood up; he would not say no to the opportunity of destroying more tree creatures, if it should happen to arise.
“Yes, see,” Laurence said, patting his hide. “You and I will be instrumental in our help, my dear, even if it is only to help people escape, should they need an escape.” He beamed at him. “Will you put me up, dear, so that we may go? Let us fly together again.”