vallo

Soooo this is a little sad but I'm also swallowing my pride because it's nearly Christmas and I just really don't wanna be stuck on my own for Christmas!

I don't know if there's any community stuff or whatever BUT if there isn't already anything organised is there like... I don't know, a thing where we can all get together if we don't already have plans to hang out and play games like we did on Thanksgiving? It was really fun and I might not be a good cook but I can totally kick all your butts at Monopoly or Smash Bros >:)

( private handwritten journal of Eddie Kaspbrak  )

BROS. Good news for everyone who came to our Spookegster and loved it, or who didn't come to our Spookegster and have had a severe case of the FOMO, or who weren't here for Spookegster at all:

~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~New Keg: Who Dis?~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~*~*~ Epik Kegster New Year New Keg!!!!!

(the title is a work in progress)

New Years Eve at the Haus, bring your A-Z game, we're partying.

What is an Epik Kegster? I refer you to my Spookegster information which is basically the same thing except substitute BITTY'S HALLOWEEN THEMED SNACKS with BITTY'S NEW YEARS THEMED SNACKS. You can even dress up if you want, we don't give a shit.

I open the floor to questions, comments, compliments, and gifs.

As we near the holiday season, I'll remind you:

• Do not drink too much.
  • Because I know you will, as (most) of you are human and stupid, and drinking too much is how you demonstrate cheer without having to rely on creativity, when you drink too much and you are worried about getting home...
• Contact me to get you there safely.
• I am responsible, discreet, and used to having humans leak mysterious fluids of all kinds on me.
• I will ensure that you reach home without incident and will annoy you until you drink at least three glasses of water.
• Unless:
  • You want to talk about your feelings, my feelings, or some other person's feelings. I don't care.
  • You hit on me, flirt with me, or touch me inappropriately. I find human sexual interaction disgusting AF.
  • You insult me or behave rudely. I don't fucking put up with that. This is a free service. Behave like something better than your species.
  • Only the hockey humans may call me Murderbro. This is law.
• Thank you and stay safe.
  • Unless I don't like you, in which case, die in a snowbank.

Happy holidays (I am being vague because they are all the same to me).

XOXOXO Murderbot

Actually me right now:



Because this beauty showed up in my apartment, and you don't even want to know about the noise I made when I saw it. It was extremely pornographic.

So yeah, I'll just be kicking ass all day until I have to do adult things like go to work or shower or like, eat real food. Anyone who wants to come over and take a turn, let me know. You'll love it. So stress-relieving. So...not stress-relieving. It's kind of a double-edged sword.

( achilles )

Oh, something brilliant happened. My wall from home got here! I've got all these clippings and that, Annie used to say it was like a vision board, but it's all the stuff I like to look at and think about. And now it's here on my wall in my apartment.

I am missing a few pieces so if anyone sees magazine clippings popping up anywhere, let me know, yeah?

Makes it feel like home to look up at it from my bed, think about the kind of life I want to have.

What sorts of things make you feel like this is home now?

If the universe is still listening, I take back what I said about wanting to experience snow. Am willing to concede the experience might be better if it wasn't waking up in a snow pile.

Cobb Vanth. Tatooine. Anyone seen a guy in armor? Helmet never comes off, got a little green kid with him?