Serendipity Hills Animated Special: Catsmas Concludes WHO: Cat!Yao, Cat!Mingjue, Cat!Huaisang, Lan Xichen, and a special appearance by Luo Qingyang/MianMian, cat behaviorist and detective WHAT: The truth is revealed at last WHEN: Airing today, right after the paired episode of animated animal detective show Mian-Mian Meow WHERE: Lan Xichen's house in Serendipity Hills WARNINGS: Scheming, revelations, crossovers
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“Mr. Lan, you have an instigator.”
The verdict came from Luo Qingyang, known to the internet as Mian-Mian Meow, cat behaviorist extraordinaire, also known as Lan Xichen’s last hope for peace in his home.
Xichen sighed. “I know, Mingjue–”
“It’s not Mingjue.”
Xichen blinked, startled. “What?”
“Mingjue is big, loud, and reactive, but he’s not the one starting things,” Mian-Mian replied. “You can be forgiven for thinking he is - he’s the first one you hear and see doing something, and on a normal day you’re not watching your cats’ every move. I have been this week, though, and with a little help from Huaisang–”
“...help from Huaisang?” Xichen tilted his head, looking ironically a great deal like Huaisang when he put on his puzzled kitty act.
“Oh, he just got me looking in the right direction here and there,” she said with a dismissive wave. She wasn’t about to start the conversation where she explained to Xichen that his cats were way too smart for their own good while still being deeply stupid, or that she could understand what animals said to her. This was a crossover episode, people could watch Mian-Mian Meow if they wanted to see her and Huaisang team up to solve mysteries. She also doubted Xichen could handle knowing that his youngest cat had acquired several hours of video footage proving beyond a doubt that Mingjue had nothing to do with the Christmas decoration debacle.
“A-Yao here is your troublemaker,” she went on, scratching behind the cat in question’s perky little orange ears. “I think he feels insecure in his position in the house, so he tries to undermine Mingjue and…well, he trolls him, basically. I think what will help more than anything else is if you arrange to spend some one-on-one time with all the cats so they feel secure in your affection, add some more furniture, particularly high shelves they can get on to get away from each other and feel like king of the castle, and of course one more litter box never hurts.”
“You think? Really?”
“I do. Playing with them more should also…”
The conversation faded as Xichen walked Mian-Mian to the door, leaving the three cats to stare at each other. Huaisang daintily licked his paw while Yao fumed and Mingjue purred in bone-deep satisfaction.
“Looks like your only-cat dreams are done for,” Mingjue said with a smug flick of his tail.
“Yes, well, so are your dreams of having me buried alive or eaten by coyotes,” Yao retorted.
“Whatever, at least everyone knows you’re a snake now. And your accomplice is getting turned over to that feral rehab guy!” Mingjue snickered, in so much as a cat was capable of snickering.
Yao sniffed. “I’m sure Xue Yang will be very happy living indoors. Maybe Mr. Xiao can make him stop all that vulgar territory-marking.”
“Good luck to him,” Huaisang said under his breath, in between the continued careful grooming of his paws. “Anyway, can you both just accept that your plot failed, I’m smarter than both of you, and Father’s not getting rid of anyone or burying anybody alive? It seems pretty clear now that he’d let any one of us burn this whole place down and still wouldn’t send any of us back to the shelter.”
“I suppose,” Yao sighed. “I didn’t mean for him to get hurt by all this, you know.”
“Your intentions mean less than nothing,” Mingjue growled. “He was bleeding because of that mess you made!”
“Mingjue…”
“Okay, yes,” Mingjue sighed. “An end to hostilities, then…if you stay out of my way, snake.”
“If you stay out of mine and don’t interrupt when Father pets me, sure.”
“Fine.”
“Good.”
“Great.”
“Perfect.”
“Oh my gods shut up both of you.”
“Super.”
“Awesome.”
[And the synonyms continue while Huaisang sighs until the music takes over, the credits roll, and we close on a picture of all three cats dressed up for Christmas: Mingjue with a red bow around his neck, Huaisang with a star perched on his head, and Yao looking extremely disgruntled in a cat-sized ugly Christmas sweater. Happy Holidays!]