You know what would be a great addition to the welcoming committee's spiel? A list of therapists. Now I can't trust any little froggy looking shithead because it might stab me.
RIP boots, you were good to me and protected my ankles.
[ FILTERED TO CAROLINE FORBES ] Tell me not to tell the latest vampire arrival that I want his semen. Yes, I'm aware I'm a shit-stirrer, which is why I need you to tell me no.
What are you and the kid doing this weekend? I was thinking about hitting Blizzard World while contemplating what to do with my adult life now. Figured the kid would get a kick out of it, while we day drunk.