WHAT: Dealing with feels evoked by, y'know, having a future child together WHERE: L-Corp Penthouse WHEN: Backdated to the evening of the 15th WARNINGS: Confessing feelings and lady kissing STATUS: Complete
Yes, theirs, because even if L-Corp had transplanted from one world to another because of Lena, she had made sure that the penthouse was very much Alex’s too for as long as they stayed here. The finishing touches like colors, decor, even some of the furniture were chosen with her input too - and she found herself to be very fortunate to share a space with someone who made sure to not select home goods that were visual eye sores. There was still this unaddressed tension between them (though she was beginning to take a hint, when Alex said I know a beautiful woman when I see one). It had stirred some feelings she tried to tamp down because how appropriate was it to have a thing for your best friend’s sister (especially when she had once had a thing for her best friend).
But those stirrings were hard to ignore when their home was filled with the presence of a tiny wood elf that showed up and blankly told them they were his mothers, and made themselves boldly comfortable. Which was fine, Lena was more than happy to make sure he stayed comfortable and learning about Theo (their son) had been the strangest joy to have ever experienced, but.
Truthfully, Lena never thought she’d hit this milestone. Not that she was against having kids but to bring a child into the mess that was her family wasn’t something she planned on doing. Unless they were all dead for good, or something - jail could also work except that Luthors proved to be able to mess things up in prison too. So, no, she wouldn’t put a kid through the curse of being related to them.
Here, though?
“I always thought things here would always be so - temporary?” Lena mused aloud, bringing Alex a mug of warmed apple cider. They’d found clothes for Theo and things to keep him occupied, like those intricate little legos that required an immense amount of patience and precision to put together. That’s what he was currently doing - dressed in Halloween pajamas, television on for more background noise than anything. “Like it was pointless to make an actual family here because what if that just… disappears one day? And you’re left behind?”
It was a heavy topic to suddenly bring up but it needed to be discussed. Alex and Lena needed to address the elephant in the room.
Alex hadn’t been kidding when she told Mobius she couldn’t feel her face.
It was no secret that she wanted kids. It was the reason she and Maggie had fallen apart. She wanted a family in their future, and Maggie didn’t. And it sucked and it hurt — still to this day, sometimes, it hurt — but it wasn’t something Alex was prepared to give up. She wanted to be a mom someday, and if that was with someone, great. If it meant single motherhood, she would do that, too. She’d taken care of Kara for years; she could handle just about anything.
What she hadn’t expected was to do the mom thing with Lena.
Waking up and coming down into the living room of the two-story penthouse Lena had constructed for them out of L-Corp’s two top floors only to be greeted by an adorable little wood elf jumping her and calling her Mama and finding out Lena was Mom before demands to play chess were made was possibly the last thing she’d expected to happen this morning. There may have been a handful of other options that made that list, but none of those entered her crazy, swirling mind at that moment.
She hadn’t really know how to react except to do as she was asked. So, she put on a smile, gave him a squeeze back, and let herself be totally trounced playing a game of chess with him until Lena popped in, and then there were more chaotic greetings and explanations. And it was a trip, but at least they weren’t alone. Vallo was suddenly being flooded with kids of all ages and some people were slipping up and down the aging scale, too.
It was a mess. But now that Alex could feel her face again and had witnessed how sweet Theo was, she was starting to feel more like herself again. The numbness was gone.
Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately?), Vallo’s surprise timeslip event meant there were things she and Lena needed to deal with soon. Like, now. They had never so much as gone on a date, and Alex was still struggling with her feelings and attraction toward Lena, but she’d been getting there. She’d gotten a lot of Mobius-shaped encouragement lately, plenty from Richie and Sara (though more generally) in the past, and she’d been just trying to work out how to talk about it all. It was complicated, and maybe that was because she was making it complicated but still.
In the future, though, they were doing the mom thing together, apparently. So that had to mean something deeper was going on, right? Unless they were doing a platonic partnership thing which she thought wasn’t impossible but probably unlikely. Eventually, even she had to get over herself and say something and that was probably what had led to taking in a baby together and raising him together. It sounded like a pretty great future from what Theo had been telling them.
They could get through this. They were the last ones left from back home now that Kara (both versions), Lois, and Clark had made the disappearance list. Whatever happened, that wasn’t going to change Alex being there for Lena and vice versa, she knew that.
“Yeah, I know,” she sighed, wrapping her fingers around the mug’s handle and desperately wishing it was a bottle of beer. She’d had those fears, too, for a long time. It felt a little more permanent now, after nearly eight months on her end, but this tiny piece of her knew very well that could change in the blink of an eye. Kara had been here for over a year before she’d been sucked out of here. “I guess there’s at least one timeline where that isn’t the case, though.”
It was very doubtful this whole arrangement involved platonic co-parenting. That was a conclusion she was sure Alex made too, and after handing over the mug she grabbed one for herself to nurse. The cider was festive - perhaps not as popular as the current pumpkin craze but it was cozy, warm and sweet. It fit the scene she was watching right now, Theo’s nose scrunched up in concentration as he put the pieces together.
“I like this timeline then,” Lena chimed in smoothly, taking a sip. Right now her hands were in relatively safe places - one on her drink, while her other arm was around her own waist. But her closeness to Alex was intentional, shoulders at least touching. “I’m almost certain that Vallo is the only place I’ll ever have a child in. Back home? Not so much.”
The dangers there were more catastrophic, literally multiverse ending and if there was ever any moment of peace - she probably wouldn’t trust it.
But here, strangely, despite the eccentricities and sometimes dangerous moments - there was peace here.
“You would have been a good mom back home, too.” Alex bumped her shoulder against Lena’s and turned to smile at her; it was a little tired but soft and sincere. “But I get it. The sh—stuff we were dealing with back there didn’t exactly make it the most kid-friendly environment.” She’d had a whole adoption portfolio put together for ages back home but never submitted it. How could she when she was constantly throwing herself headlong into danger?
Here, though — yeah, it was possible. There was always something going on, but there were so many hero types out there that half the time, Alex wasn’t really needed. She’d been devoting more of her time to Al’s and the lab than Defense lately and had even mulled over the idea of making the switch to Reserves full-time. Involving herself in every dangerous situation that happened here didn’t feel as necessary as it had before.
“I guess we decided to do it together at some point.” She turned her attention back to Theo, steadily building whatever Lego building he’d selected from the pile they’d brought home for him. “He doesn’t seem too traumatized, right?”
The penthouse had a very open floor plan; spacious and bright, fitted with tall ceilings and the common areas all connected. The kitchen - equipped with way too many gadgets, even a fridge that was a touch screen - overlooked the living room, and Lena found herself leaning against one of the counters. They could snuggle up on the couch together but Theo would be in earshot of their conversation, and she didn’t want to break their concentration.
“He’s brilliant,” Lena stated fondly, red lips curving into a smile. No doubt they were very invested in his education but from the sound of it they didn’t skimp on letting him live out his childhood, either. “But.” A pause, just to take another sip of her cider. “I’d imagine you and I were in a very good place in this life to decide to take the leap into parenthood together, don’t you agree?”
Might as well get right into it. Lena’s eyes were practically piercing into her, bold and daring with a hint of amusement.
Alex couldn’t help but snap her gaze back to Lena’s when she asked that particular question. Her face turned hot and she rubbed a hand across the back of her neck, that awful nervous habit cropping up as it always did in moments she felt flustered. But she’d known this was coming. There was no way around it with their literal son in their home as living, breathing proof that their relationship was — well, a relationship.
“I think we’d have to be,” she agreed. “Which makes sense because I, uh - I care about you, Lena. A lot. I always have, but it’s really changed since we’ve been here. And I know you - like, you’ve had feelings for Kara in the past, and I had all of that - angst around Kelly and what to do there and - ”
She sighed, breaking off mid-sentence to collect herself. She was rambling and going down roads they didn’t need to go down. The Kara road was certainly not one they needed to tread, since it had never outright been admitted, but Alex knew and it was a part of what she’d been struggling with. She needed to just recenter herself and refocus and say what she needed to say without making it complicated. What was wrong with her that this was so hard again? It felt like it had with Maggie, being this terrified to just suck it up and confess how she felt. Lena was as good as asking her to just say it and she couldn’t get it out of her mouth.
“I think you’re amazing,” she tried again, her tone much stronger and more certain now. “And yeah, I want to be with you. I want - whatever this is with you and me and Theo, I want it, I really do. But even if we didn’t have him, I’d want to be with you. I want you.”
Lena’s coolness about the situation went up in smoke quickly - perhaps it shouldn’t be surprising to have Alex ramble (she did that when she was nervous sometimes, it was endearing) but she hadn’t expected all of that. Kara, especially, when she’d done her best to smother those feelings to cinders and ash. And she’d been successful, yes, she knew that was a ship that would never sail and absence didn’t make the heart grow fonder, it just made it easier to let things die.
But having stirrings about her best friend’s sister had been unprecedented. Crushes weren’t uncommon with Lena - she’s had plenty, and plenty of them had been women but rarely were they acted on. Vallo allowed her to explore that with restrictions. Casual sex was fine, and maybe had been an attempt to eliminate what she was sure was a silly crush except it hadn’t been working.
And it meant something that Alex was on a similar boat, even if Theo’s presence made them aware of just where they’d land together.
Her mug of cider was set aside. Lena let her say her piece, and there was so much that she needed to say too. But for the sake of making it painfully obvious and taking the point home, her mind was made. Lena took Alex’s face into her hands, and took one last look into those damn beautiful eyes and - she kissed her. It wasn’t some passionate frenzy of desperation (hello, child literally yards away from them) but it was silencing and firm, enough to muss up the lipstick that stained her mouth.
Any higher brain functions Alex may have still had going completely shut down when Lena kissed her. She floundered for a split second before she snapped back to herself and her arms slipped around Lena’s waist to pull her closer. She deepened the kiss just a bit, nothing crazy; she was very conscious of how close Theo was and that it was likely he could interrupt them at any time, but she needed more for just a moment. Just long enough to assure herself this was happening and real and not some sort of too-real dream.
By the time they had to break apart to breathe, Alex could see where Lena’s lipstick had smeared off and she let out a soft chuckle, lifting a thumb to pass across her bottom lip. “So, that means you feel the same way, right?”
Nothing crazy was good. Nothing crazy with their kisses was for the best right now - because while the thought of taking Alex to bed had crossed her mind (more than once) she didn’t want to immediately jump to that. Not just because Theo was around (either too engrossed in what he was doing to notice the liplocking his mothers were doing or he was too polite to comment), but because they’d been doing the casual sleeping around thing with others enough and this wasn’t casual for Lena. Far from it.
She could only guess what made Alex so amused but didn’t care - this was a nice way to remove makeup, and she may have been smiling a lot. “I do,” Lena confirmed, and leaned in to press a much softer kiss on those lips. “I have - been feeling the same way for a while, I mean. I just felt guilty with everything you were going through about Kelly, and then it doesn’t help that you were… right, about me having a thing for Kara. I don’t, by the way. Not anymore.”
That needed to be said. The last thing she wanted was for Alex to have any insecurities about that - or doubts. Obviously Lena loved Kara, but not like that.
There was some sort of mix of relief and insecurity that followed what Lena said. Knowing she didn’t feel that way for Kara was good, obviously. Alex wouldn’t feel right trying something with her if she still had feelings for someone else, never mind her sister, and who could blame her. Kara was great, just as Kara and as a literal superhero. If they hadn’t had that familial tie knotting them together since their preteen years, it would probably have been a thought for her, too. Supergirl was admittedly hot, objectively.
But even if Lena didn’t have those feelings for Kara anymore, there was still a small, primitive part of Alex that felt nervous she wouldn’t measure up. She wasn’t blessed with her sister’s gifts; she was no Supergirl and never would be. Lena knew that, though. She knew who Alex was even though they were possibly the worst communicators in the world. They would need to work on syncing back up, after months of keeping things unspoken and living much more individual lives, but they could do it. They both wanted it — that had to be enough.
“If we’re getting it all out there, Kelly - those feelings have faded,” Alex admitted, lifting her hand to brush down the line of Lena’s jaw. “She’s great, and I loved her, but I think - I let myself think I felt what she felt for me. I wanted so badly to be with someone again, and she was so open and so willing and it felt easy.”
And that was saying something because Alex Danvers didn’t typically do easy. Easy irked her, made her realize something was missing; that was probably why she’d struggled so much to connect with Kelly. This, with Lena, was more her style. It hadn’t been easy. It had been downright painful at times, but that was how she knew it was important to her. That’s how she knew this was what she really wanted and that it was time to get her shit together and go for it. It was worth all the drama and stupidity and navigating of hard feelings to end up here.
“But I never wanted her like I want you,” she continued, locking her gaze on Lena’s. “Not even close.”
Well, wasn’t that smoldering look intense. How attractive of her, to look at her dead in the eye and confess how she wanted her - and it was a terrible and completely inappropriate time to feel a certain fire light up in her belly but it was there. Lena couldn’t help it. It made her stupidly giddy, and she was far too sophisticated (she wasn’t) to be giddy.
Biting her bottom lip with a faked timidness (especially with the vixen eyes she was giving her, no way was she actually shy), she reached for Alex’s hand to hold and lace their fingers together. “I don’t know about you but I’m officially wooed,” she chuckled, tilting her head to the side just a fraction. “Does this mean you’re open to me properly wining and dining you on dates? Perhaps labeling this something properly so people know we’re taken?”
Lena felt something brush against her hips as a certain someone sauntered over to the sink to drop off a cup.
“If you two are done courting each other,” Theo started with a roll of his eyes. “Can we order pizza?? I’m hungry and my brain requires more fuel for my work.”
His work, of course, being legos. What a drama queen.
For a minute, Alex had almost forgotten that they weren’t alone. Those eyes and the lip bite — it was putting some ideas in Alex’s head that were very inappropriate with their child lingering nearby. Something she was very abruptly reminded of when he brushed by them to huff at them about courting and request pizza.
Courting? God, that reminded Alex of Kara when she’d first moved in with her family in Midvale. She oscillated between weird as hell and stiff and formal, which was a different kind of weird in and of itself. Kryptonian Kara had definitely referred to dating and relationships as courting a few times she could remember.
But Alex wasn’t too quick to pull away, despite Theo hovering nearby. “Yes to all of those things,” she told Lena, meeting her eyes before she stole another kiss. And then, to Theo, “And if that’s what your brain requires for your very important Lego construction, I guess pizza can be arranged, too. What’s your favorite topping?”
Okay, fine, it was time to break the seductress facade with Theo invading their personal bubble. Besides, hard not to genuinely smile when being kissed again - Alex’s lips were so soft, and she felt so good pressed up against her but alas. Parenthood (as temporary as it was) called, and it was an interruption she didn’t find herself minding one bit.
Holding hands was still a family-friendly demonstration of romantic affection though. That didn’t stop, and Lena may have also grabbed Alex’s face to smother with a few cheek kisses.
“Ugh.” Theo rolled his eyes. Ew, moms. Was this necessary? His hair was a little long, and messy, and he tucked some pesky strands behind an adorably pointed ear. “I like spinach and artichoke though. Thin crust. Extra cheese, please. Can I have some ice cream afterwards?”
Lena’s brows rose in amusement at their son (she’d never get over that). “That’s a topping I never thought would be someone’s favorite,” she said. “It’s a good thing though, I’m glad you seem to have found the balance between vegetables and dessert.”
“Soooo…” he rocked back and forth on his feet with a sweet little smile. “Is that a yes?”
Alex tried not to let herself blush but judging by how quickly her cheeks warmed, that fight was futile. Warm fluttery feelings filled her chest and belly as she squeezed Lena’s hand in hers, but she kept her focus on their son and his cuteness. Cuteness he was very obviously trying to wield against them to get his way. She suspected it was the ice cream he thought required some sweet talking.
But for a kid who declared spinach and artichoke to be his favorite pizza toppings? It seemed to Alex like he’d earned the right to whatever ice cream he wanted right there. She was by no means an unhealthy eater, but neither of those were toppings she’d ever have considered for pizza.
“Sure, sweetie, I don’t see a problem with that.” Alex reached into her pocket to pull out her phone; she had the app for the nearest pizza joint to them on her phone’s front page. “Want to put in an order? Get a real pizza for Mama, too, okay?”
Theo was beaming, snatching the phone from Alex’s hands with excitement. “I know what pizzas you guys like! And mommy’s rich so we can get whatever we want,” he tacked on and if Lena had been drinking that cider she’d abandoned she would have probably choked. “I’ll calculate the tip in my head to see if my math is right, okay?”
Then he bounced back towards the living room and threw himself on the couch, scrolling through the menu items.
“He’s so cute,” Lena sighed contently. “And - probably spoiled.” Between the two of them Theo surely had everything he could need and want, and judging from the bits and pieces he provided about what he could remember of his childhood before the two of them came along - he deserved it. “I might not be able to stop at just the one if that’s an issue, Danvers.”
Lena didn’t think it’d be, and she went to give her cheek another faint stain of red lipstick with another kiss.
Nope, no issues from Alex. Not a hint of protesting. Not when those lips were on her cheek again. And now that Theo was distracted again, she turned back toward Lena, tilted her chin up with her free hand, and kissed off some more lipstick, letting their lips linger a little longer. Theo could huff and act like they were gross all he wanted — his moms had literally just figured their shit out. Kisses were a must.
“I’m okay with more than one. As many as you want.” It didn’t seem like they’d screwed Theo up in any terrible ways, so she wouldn’t say no to the possibility. Her sister was one of the best things that had ever happened to her. She couldn’t even imagine who she’d be without that relationship, without Kara. Theo should get to have a sibling, too. “We could have a whole house full here.”
“Mmmm,” Lena hummed in a contemplative way, face scrunching up into this funny little grimace at having a whole house of them. “We will have to discuss an actual numeric limit sometime down the road.”
It’d be a weirdly good conversation to have, though in a funny way they were kind of moving backwards and fast but - it seemed the events that led up to them being moms to Theo were going to happen either way. Perhaps she’d scrutinize it under a more thorough scientific lens later, but right now she was going to enjoy their existence as a little family.
Her fingers pushed through Alex’s short hair, fingernails gently scratching at her scalp. “But if I’m settling down with a family here - I’m glad it’s with you, Alex.”