Eleanor knocked on the door to Marina's penthouse, careful not to drop the frozen yogurt she had balanced. She'd brought Marina her favorite, but decided on Rocky Road for herself because it seemed more fitting than anything that could potentially bring joy.
She'd woken up that morning with a perfect sense of contentment, only to have that feeling fade away the longer the day went on. By the time she'd left work, anxiety had crept in, and she texted Marina that she was coming over with froyo, without any other warning as to the state she was in.
Which to be fair, she couldn't exactly describe. Though that wouldn't stop her from trying once she was in Marina's apartment. It almost felt like an ambush with Marina being who she was, but somehow Marina had become her best friend so here she was.
When the door opened, Eleanor said, "Hey," offering the yogurt without her usual enthusiasm and stepping inside before Marina could change her mind.
Marina hadn’t really thought about anything when Eleanor messaged her about coming by with froyo. She’d never really been into froyo, but canceled plans was the only flavor really worth trying. Mother’s Love was honestly the grossest thing she’d ever been curious about in her life. She wouldn’t eat it, though.
When she opened the door and Eleanor pushed her way inside, she stared at her for a long time, froyo in hand. Something was off. She couldn’t really place what it was, but she could tell because she’d gotten to know Eleanor’s various moods. She nearly pressed her immediately for what was going on, but she wasn’t sure if the pressure would open a can of worms she wasn’t overly interested in popping open.
Except she knew, if pressed herself, she wouldn’t leave just because of whatever. “Is there someone I need to murder? I’ve got my shovel in the closet.” Because she was just going to choose violence instead of anything remotely gentle.
"Thank you," Eleanor said, looking up at Marina having already made her way to the couch. "That's sweet, in a totally creepy way." She ate a couple spoonfuls of froyo before she added, "I don't think you can just murder Vallo though."
The Rocky Road froyo was frustratingly delicious even if Eleanor wasn't necessarily in a mood to enjoy it properly.
"That thing where you wake up having lived out your future or whatever? Sucks."
Marina knew that feeling. Though, hers were spread out a bit. It was weird to have so many new memories jumbled up with everything else, but Marina and Eleanor had watched all of Eleanor’s future. So she knew what she could know, but not how far forward she’d jumped. “I could try to fight an entire place,” she said as if that was the part worth focusing on. “I could take Vallo.”
She kept her expression neutral, walking closer to the couch and sitting on the ottoman easily. She wasn’t really sure what else to say now, but it was probably not reasonable to keep deflecting and she didn’t think texting Julia to ask what the fuck to do at this point was the choice because she didn’t really want to explain everything at once. She took a bite of her froyo.
“So how far did you get?”
"Well, I hadn't yet walked through the door, but I was on my way," Eleanor replied, knowing Marina would know exactly where that was, having watched the entire show with her.
"Which brings up so many questions, starting with, if I leave here, is everything over?" Not that she really expected Marina to have an answer to that, she just wanted to voice it aloud to someone who would know why she was asking.
That was late in the show. The end of it all. Marina wasn’t really sure what to say about it. She just hoped to avoid actually getting the memory and the emotions behind her last season. She didn’t want anything else from her show. She was happy to stay that way.
Marina didn’t answer her question because she was pretty sure it was just something she’d asked to the room at large and it wasn’t like she had an answer to help her with whatever this bullshit was. “So is this a drinking situation or?”
"It's definitely a drinking situation," Eleanor agreed. "Because you know what else? I finally know what it's like to be in a healthy, happy relationship. Which is nice. Except that's over too, if I leave here. Chidi's already gone."
She stared at her froyo, eating it somewhat angrily because really, it was too delicious and she maybe would have preferred cilantro. (That was a lie, she never wanted cilantro.) "I mean, it's nice to have all these memories compared to having just watched it but could I not have woken up at like the beginning of the end and still have many, many… years left to enjoy it?" She'd almost used Jeremy Bearimys but even with the memories she was still a bit hazy as to how those worked.
"I knocked on Jason's door this afternoon until he answered, just to make sure he was still here."
Marina got up to get one of the bottles of alcohol, handing it over. She could use glasses, but it seemed like something that probably didn’t strictly require glasses. It wasn’t like it was a full bottle anyway. Between everything, she wasn’t really stingy with her alcohol. It wasn’t like she drank every day, but sometimes she needed something at the end of a day when she was by herself.
“I assume he’s still there because you’re here.” She ate some more of her froyo, not letting her emotions regarding it register on her face. It was really good. But this was some sort of serious situation and she thought she shouldn’t go in smug and pleased about her canceled plans feelings. She tried to find something distracting to mention, but she didn’t have anything.
"Oh, I'd still be here if he wasn't here, I'd just be crying," Eleanor said. "So this could be worse."
She had to smile slightly at that because she knew Marina, and she knew her showing up sobbing at Marina's apartment would probably be a nightmare scenario for the other woman. And she wouldn't have bothered with frozen yogurt then so there wouldn't even be that benefit.
"I managed to work this morning. But like the feeling I woke up with is gone and now I'm just left to wonder what this means, and I definitely don't want to disappear from here anytime soon."
Eleanor took a drink from the bottle, not even trying to figure out what it was, and then she set the bottle down on the coffee table because whatever it was didn't mix with her froyo very well. But that was almost finished, and when she was done, she swapped the empty container and spoon for the bottle again.
"You know what this is? This is some serious bullshirt. Shit. Dammit I need to be able to swear right." She was almost pouting as she took another swig.
Marina wrinkled her nose at the idea of crying. It wasn’t the first time she’d ever dealt with someone crying and it probably wasn’t going to be the last, but she’d avoid it as much as she could. She definitely didn’t like it, but, if she was honest, she’d want to find a way to help even if the crying was gross and unfortunate. But she didn’t have to be honest with herself or anyone else in this moment, so all she said was, “I might shut the door in your face.” Which was not true. She might have immediately gone for the alcohol and found FB.
Almost as if it summoned him, she heard a small chirp and looked down to find FB handling the job she didn’t feel like dealing with and started rubbing up against Eleanor’s legs. She considered going to get him treats briefly before focusing on Eleanor for a moment. “Welcome to the fucked up world of annoying bullshit.” She shrugged. “But I will throw something at you if you keep Good Place swearing. Just saying.”
She glanced over to find that FB had jumped up on the couch, doing his best to climb onto Eleanor’s lap in order to start kneading her legs. “Did you want treats for him or no?”
FB's arrival cheered Eleanor up and she immediately focused her attention on the cat. She loved that thing, and his face that made him look permanently scarred for life. She loved that Marina had seen him and immediately wanted to give him a home.
"Yeah, treats would be good, wouldn't they FB?" she asked, momentarily distracted. "Then come over here and share so I'm not drinking by myself and being generally pathetic. And don't throw anything at me. I just dreamt up like hundreds of years overnight, which included a lot of Good Place swearing. A lot."
Marina grabbed a few treats out of the bag of treats in order to avoid over feeding him treats before taking them over and dropping them into Eleanor’s lap. FB was mostly her being annoyed that anyone told her no when she saw a cat and it followed her from one part of town to another after she gave it some attention. She probably wouldn’t have taken FB in, but once she was told she wasn’t allowed to, she was dead set on doing what she was told not to do.
There was a quick eye roll as she sat near Eleanor, but tried to keep at least an arm’s length away even if Eleanor could have easily moved over and still hugged her, but she also had a lap full of FB, so she was probably safe. “I’m pretty sure I’d still throw something at you. Can’t give you a break because you had weird dreams.” She still took the alcohol and took a swig anyway.
“It’s not my fault you’re somehow over 100 years old if you count post-death years.”
Eleanor immediately set to feeding FB the treats, leaving the cat purring and snuggling up with her more. "You're proof Marina has a heart," she told the cat, only half-joking. "That and the fact that she didn't immediately kick me out. Don't tell her we know, but she cares more than she ever lets on."
Now she dared to glance over at Marina, quickly adding, "Thank you, by the way."
“If you’re looking to get kicked out, I can do that for you right now.” She gestured toward the door, very nearly getting up for the purpose of selling her point. “You definitely know where the door is by now.” Having cats was just apparently a very her thing anyway. And she was both stubborn and annoying when it came to being told not to do something. Surprise?
“Yeah yeah. But if you go around telling people lies about me as a person like that, you’re gonna need a new friend, cause I’ll pull the ultimate friend removal spell on you with clown portraits.” She took another swig from the bottle before handing it over.
"Your secret is safe with me," Eleanor said, welcoming the bottle back from Marina. "I don't know about FB though. He may talk."
She took a long drink and then laughed somewhat mirthlessly. "If I leave, and you get that clown portrait done, I definitely wouldn't remember it if I came back. Because this version of me will have gone poof." She lifted her free hand from FB's fur to demonstrate that poof before he nuzzled her again. It was a weird scenario to consider, and not completely unlike what Marina was already dealing with when it came to Julia, except they had history in their own world.
"I wonder what I would have done if you had greeted me with myself as a clown portrait when I showed up here…"
“You’re right, but at least I won’t have to worry about it cause you’ll hate me.” She shrugged as if the idea of it didn’t make her feel some kind of way. She could probably bury it deep down with all the other things she didn’t think about. It would be fine as long as Julia didn’t do something annoying like try to make her talk about it.
“Hard to be certain of exactly what you’d do, but probably not liked me at all.” But she wouldn’t have done that without knowing her before. “Never met you before, though, so I didn’t know I needed a plan to get rid of you early.” It was a joke, but Marina made every effort to look nonchalant, like she might actually mean it.
"Rude," Eleanor replied, tipping the bottle toward Marina to point. But then she took another swig before handing it back over, and when she spoke next she was talking to the cat again. "We both know she would miss me, don't we? You'd miss me at least, wouldn't you?"
She got no response, other than FB's continued purring, which she decided was a definite yes. "See?" she asked Marina. "Your cat knows the truth."
“FB is an attention seeker. He’d find someone else eventually.” But even he’d seemed overly affectionate when he first showed back up. Like he’d spent too much time looking for her before. But that could have just been a long work day and the fact that she didn’t smell at least somewhat like him when he turned up. It was bound to be one of those things. She wouldn’t question it too much.
As she took the bottle back and took a swig, she sighed. “I can’t make myself start RHONY over again, so we just couldn’t be friends.” As if that actually mattered. “And you’d know nothing about any of the Vallo shows and that would be equally boring of you. So it’s that or kill you and I don’t think anyone would be happy about the latter. C’est la vie.”
"Man, I'm really glad we're friends," Eleanor said. "You really know how to make people feel better. Especially the part where you would have to not be my friend cause the alternative would be killing me? Thanks!"
Her tone may have been slightly exaggerated, and Eleanor was more amused than anything. Being Marina's friend meant this is what you got. She wouldn't have expected anything less.
Marina smiled a little. “But are you overthinking now?” Cause she was pretty sure mentioning someone being murdered was distracting and she didn’t seem actually upset. But Marina would have preferred not to have to worry about Eleanor leaving and if someone tried to kill her, she’d be forced to murder them. She didn’t make the rules, she just knew them.
“I can describe how I’d kill you if it’s not enough.”
No, she wasn't. Marina had made sure of that. "I don't think a description will be necessary, thank you…" Eleanor took the moment to steal the bottle back, taking a long drink before adding, "Might as well make the most of this place while I can."
Marina shrugged as if to say your loss. Like having a death she was going to make up on the spot explained was some sort of luxury. She considered it for a moment. “Pretty sure that’s the idea. You could end up on a cruise that will try to turn you into a robot or end up murdered by turkeys of basic size or get trampled to death in a stampede out of nowhere or have to kill outlaws in some wild west bullshit adventure.” She was definitely not a fan of the fashion of that era or the clothes she was given for it. The stampede was just something she hoped Vallo ignored her mentioning because no one really wanted to deal with that.
"You ever regret losing an eye on the cruise?" Eleanor asked, something she was always curious about but had never voiced. She knew Marina better now though, enough so that she felt comfortable enough to ask. "I mean, not that your clockwork eye isn't cool and everything but…"
She shrugged. She'd never known Marina any differently and it clearly didn't bother her.
The eye was one of those things. She found ways to be used to it. She just also sometimes hated it. She never talked about it, though, because there was exactly no point in it. “I regret helping people. Because honestly they suck.” But she didn’t want to die either. “I didn’t really get a choice with the eye. Just part of the package of not wanting to die, I guess.”
"Well, for what it's worth, I'm glad that you're still alive," Eleanor replied. "So good job on not dying, because then I'd have to like, go to Jason with my existential crisis and that wouldn't end well at all. Though he can be surprisingly insightful, I think this one that includes his future would be a bit too much for him."
Marina shrugged again, but this time it was more to shrug off any potential emotional response. She did snort at the idea of Jason being the one to try to help her with emotional problems. She still wasn’t sure how he even stayed alive for as long as he did. “I don’t know about him as a whole. Like I’m pretty sure he has the memory of a goldfish. You’d probably be okay in a day or two.” She sighed, moving to sit by Eleanor and reaching over to pet FB. “This isn’t for you, in case you’re in danger of warm fuzzies.”
Eleanor took another drink, then glanced over at Marina. "Sure it's not," she said, contemplating leaning against Marina now that she was right there. Because Marina lived with the cat and could pet him anytime. That was the logic that Eleanor applied before she handed the bottle back and rested her head against Marina's shoulder. "Drink and don't complain," she directed, smiling slightly.
Marina made a face as she leaned over. “I said not for you.” But she took the bottle and drank from it anyway. “You should move before I move you.”
"Oh come on," Eleanor said casually, decidedly not moving. "You're comfortable." She waited a moment, then sighed and sat back up, deciding not to test Marina's limits further. "Thanks for listening," she added, before forcing herself to stand up, nudging FB off her lap. "And for the alcohol."
Marina had been comfortable, and even though it felt like she had slept forever, Eleanor hadn't felt the slightest bit rested when she woke up. So even though she was slightly dreading it, she was going to go and attempt to sleep.
FB made a cry of displeasure as he was unseated, and stood by the couch, hair fluffed up and expression nothing short of distraught. Marina stared at him for a moment before looking up at Eleanor. “Yeah. You know me. A paragon of kindness and understanding.” Her voice was flat when she said it. “You’ll be back for whatever nonsense this week’s Vallo show of the week turns up?”
"Why? Don't tell me you'd miss me if I disappeared," Eleanor said. "Missed out, forced a clown painting to be commissioned."
“I’m getting the clown painting commissioned right now.” Her expression shifted into a somewhat annoyed one. “Just for that.”
Eleanor paused as FB decided she was forgiven and wandered in her direction. She knelt down to scritch his head and apologize to him. And then she looked over at Marina, got up, and walked over to the couch before sitting down next to her again. "Hey," she said, nudging Marina with her elbow. "You can't get rid of me that easily."
Marina narrowed her eyes slightly. “Is that a challenge?” It wasn’t exactly something she wanted to do, but she was also liable to do it just because of an inability to stop herself if she felt like it was something she was being told she couldn’t do. “Cause I’m pretty sure I could. I’m considering the most unflattering outfit and what color would be the most ugly to go around your eyes. Also the shape that would be the most annoying to you.”
Eleanor's eyes went wide, as that wasn't quite what she was expecting, though it wasn't entirely unsurprising either. What was it she'd call Marina before? Oh yeah, an emotional, or was it unemotional, porcupine. And it seemed that way right now, something had sent those metaphorical quills up as she was suddenly defensive, and Eleanor wasn't sure which part had triggered it.
Nor was she sure she had the energy to find out when she'd come here seeking solace to start with. So she considered Marina for a moment, meeting her eyes, real and the clockwork eye she'd just asked about. "Hey," she said quietly. "I'm sorry. I'm tired. But of course I'm going to be here for whatever Vallo throws at us next."
Or at least she'd try. But she was only going to let herself be pushed so far.
Marina let the hackles that had risen up at the idea of a challenge come down. There was a chance that Eleanor wouldn’t be around and she probably shouldn’t commission her clown painting just yet. Maybe. “Yeah. Okay.” She glanced at Eleanor quietly. “Go get some sleep. I’ll see you later.”
Before Eleanor stood back up she gave Marina a slight nudge with her elbow again, in place of the hug she would have preferred to give. "I'll text you tomorrow, just to say I haven't disappeared into the void yet," she promised. She got up and looked around for FB, but he'd wandered off. So she called out goodbye to him, told Marina she'd see her later, and then headed toward the elevator to go back down to her room and actually get some rest. Which would be a lot easier since she hadn't left on a bad note.