Margo had considered bringing some wine to this talk she was going to have with Julia about what had happened in their worlds, but had reconsidered pretty quick, remembering all of the things she had learned from Eliot about other versions of the world and then researching the show they all supposedly came from. So she had found the strongest vodka that wasn’t crap at the local liquor store down the street and headed back to Morningside to be the bearer of some bad, good, and weird news and about $100 lighter.
All in all, the talk hadn’t been too bad. But that was only because Margo halfway through it, she dissociated and when she came back to herself, Julia was in shock and her throat was hoarse.
She let Julia process whatever she was going through and instead returned to the kitchen to find the mixers she had put in the fridge to chill, so she could make them more drinks. She had classes in the morning and wasn’t trying to be too hungover.
When she came back from the kitchen, she took Julia’s hand and put her drink in it. “Here,” she said, making sure Julia was hearing her, before she let go. “Drink. And maybe let me know what’s going on in that brain of yours when you get a chance.”
Q was dead. Everything else was secondary, including the fact that she had ended up with Penny from the 23rd timeline somehow and having a baby with him? That was weird, but anytime Julia's thoughts drifted to anything else Margo had said, it wasn't long until they returned to the fact that Quentin Coldwater, her best friend since they were kids, was dead.
She sat there, staring straight ahead, vaguely aware that she now had a drink in hand, trying to process that information. Margo had asked her repeatedly if she really wanted to know everything, which honestly should have tipped her off. Of everything she had learned and discovered since arriving in Vallo, nothing could have possibly prepared her for this.
And maybe Margo Hanson wasn't the best person to break the news, but who else was going to tell her? Fen? Gods, no. Marina, who was alive and from a different timeline? That was already weird enough. And Kady had already made it clear she didn't want to talk to her.
Raising her glass to her lips, Julia took a small sip, and then another, before she finally found a voice. "I think I should have said no," she said, going back to those initial questions.
Margo hadn't wanted to be the one to do this. There wasn't a bone in her body that was built to break news that was this devastating, but who else could have done it? Kady or Fen? Marina? Hell no. So it was up to her to break it as gently as she could because she would have felt like a dick if Julia found out while Googling.
"Yeah, maybe, but you would have found out eventually and then been pissed no one told you right away," Margo said, remembering the surge of anger she had felt when she had discovered Eliot had lied to her about being from the same reality, that he has been from one much worse. But ultimately, she had understood. Who wanted to accept that Quentin was dead in some realities? Somehow, that quiet man had weaseled his way into her heart in the time she had known him.
"But hey, there's always the chance that you're from my world where that nerd didn't bite it," Margo added, leaning back on the couch and taking a much bigger sip than she should have. So much for not being hungover in the morning. "We really don't know unless you get memories from your reality at some point." Which had been another bombshell she had to drop unfortunately.
Ugh, next time she was making Marina handle this.
Gaining memories was something Julia definitely didn't want to consider, so she willed herself to focus on something, anything, less devastating. "Penny? Really?" Was that part of the reason that Kady wasn't speaking to her? She'd assumed she'd known why, but that was before she knew all of this. Following Margo's lead, her next sip was much bigger than the first two. But maybe Margo was right and in her reality, Q was still alive. It wasn't really any different than accepting forty different timelines. From what she knew, the first 39 all went terribly wrong, and she didn't need to dwell on that.
For the first time, she allowed a small, wry smile to form on her lips. "I don't think you could tell me anything now that would make today worse." That was it. That was the silver lining. She looked over at Margo, still in a mixture of disbelief and shock, and added, "I can't even begin to deal with the part about the moon."
"Yeah, the moon's being a real dick back home, but Kady, Eliot, and the others back there will figure it out. It's not the worst thing, given everything that could have been a lot more terrible." Leaning forward a little, she nudged Julia's leg with her foot. "And yeah, Penny 23. It's weird, but you guys give a shit about each other. And he's hot, so it's not a total loss." She wrinkled her nose. "I mean, you could have fucked Hoberman and become a werewolf like some other versions of me did."
She still couldn't believe that one. Her? Catching feelings? Sounded fake.
"And if you hadn't hooked up with Penny and made a cute baby, I would have gone down with Fillory. So, y'know, thanks for that?"
Everything that wasn't Q was pulling Julia back into the reality of the moment, and some of the tightness in her chest loosened as Margo brought up the fact that in at least one reality she was a werewolf. "Can't any aspect of our lives be normal?" she asked. Another smile, this one more genuine. "And you're welcome? I'm glad my future child saved your life."
She finished off the rest of her drink, which had gone down way too easily, and debated the merits of another.
Snorting, Margo rolled her eyes. "Please, if we ever had a taste of normal, we'd fuck it up somehow. It's why we never get a break between crises either. We think too hard about anything of it and our tiny brains would explode."
Eying Julia and how quickly she was downing her drinks, Margo supposed that if there was a time to get drunk, it was probably now. So she offered her drink to Julia, which was still mostly full, and went up to go make another one. "I don't condone alcohol poisoning, so maybe slow down just a bit? This shit has been distilled a stupid amount of times," she called over her shoulder, as she reentered the kitchen and made another one for herself. This time it was more juice than vodka.
Strolling back into the room, she leaned against the wall. "Nothing's guaranteed, Julia. Not in this world or our own. But I get it. This stuff is hard to hear, to process. You knew Q better than I ever did and I know it probably feels a lot like what I would feel if I lost Eliot like that. So grieve, cry, get angry about it. Just don't dwell too long, okay? Don't lose yourself, cause Coldwater wouldn't want that."
The only thing that could have been weirder than Margo telling her to slow down would be if Eliot was around to do the same. And if it was possible to kill a deity with alcohol poisoning her job would have been a lot easier. But she did slow down, barely taking a sip of Margo's drink.
And then Margo mentioned Q, and the world froze again. How did she even start to process something that sounded so preposterous, and so out there? Something she couldn't even begin to fathom as being real even when coupled with that sinking feeling that told her it was, threatening to pull her under if she thought too much about it.
"I'm not…" Julia said quietly, her voice tightening. "I can't, yet. Thank you for telling me, but…" The words felt off even as she said them, but she couldn't put weight on the idea, she couldn't let that reality sink in. Not even with dangerous levels of alcohol in her drink, that still wouldn't poison her if she tried. She stared down into the glass, at least recognizing that it wasn't going to provide her with a long term solution. But forgetting for the night wouldn't be unwelcome.
Sighing, Margo walked over and sat next to Julia, bumping shoulders with her. “Yeah, I remember this from when I thought we had lost Eliot. It’s going to suck, so if you want to cry, I’m not going to judge you.” God, being in Vallo had definitely made her softer in a way that she hadn’t been before. She had been learning how to let her defenses down and let people in, but in Vallo with all of the downtime and lack of world ending problems, Margo had lost the edge that had people crossing the street to avoid her.
Putting her glass on the table, she leaned into that softer side of her and put an arm around Julia. “We never speak of this,” she warned Julia, as she tightened her grip.
Julia's hands were starting to shake, something she only realized by watching the liquid in her drink slosh side to side, and so she managed to set the glass down without spilling anything. Then she leaned into Margo's hold, not even questioning the fact that as far as she knew, Margo didn't even like her that much. But the day had been too weird and between whatever was in her drink and the shock of finding herself here, and everything Margo had told her, Julia was tired.
"Is this going to still stand in like a week, when the shock wears off?" she asked, because she couldn't cry, couldn't move past denial, couldn't allow herself to try when none of it felt real enough to do so. Though something about the question almost made her laugh, because she was essentially asking Margo if she was going to be nice again later, which seemed absurd and yet valid at the same time.
“Only if you’re truly pathetic then,” Margo said, trying not to smile. Because yeah, that was completely valid. She wasn’t nice and she wasn’t caring, but still. This felt more fucked up than their usual level of fucked up. Well, not more. But different. “So please don’t be, I don’t know how this shit works and I’m already getting hives over being this close to you without being naked.”
Sex was something Margo understood. She could hold a full lecture on it and still have more insights to offer after. But giving a shit? Not her wheelhouse at all. “Anyway, this place is going to keep you on your toes with its random murder turkeys and killer bunnies. But at least it won’t be world ending stuff.” At least, none of it had been so far. The trend would hopefully continue.
At the mention of hives, Julia couldn't help but smile. A small laugh escaped, even. That felt more normal, and more on brand for Margo. Even so, she didn't move away for another few minutes. When she did, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and said, "I'm not making any promises about next time."
Another half-smile. "But thanks."
Margo tried for a smile that wasn’t as sarcastic as her usual ones and patted Julia’s knee, in what she hoped was a comforting way. “I would say any time, but yeah.” If she needed to woman up again in the future, she would. But there would be complaints along the way. “Come on,” she said, coming back to her normal self and grabbing the vodka and waving it. “Let’s get you shitfaced so you don’t have to think about this. Want to do body shots?”
This time Julia did laugh because that was the Margo she knew. "I still have your drink, and you need to catch up," she pointed out, eyebrow quirked. She was definitely down with drinking more, though, and she took the glass back and took another sip, motivated to get to the point where she wasn't thinking anymore.