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I won my last bout. I'm thinking about having a party or something, maybe renting a bar for an evening. Any of you random so-and-sos want to come? The more the merrier.

Edit: Going to have this shindig on the 21st at [Random Bar Address]. I rented the thing, so drink as much as you want. But if you try to drive home drunk, just know I'm really good at popping shoulders out of socket.

The day's barely begun, and I can already tell that it is going to be just dreadful. I burned myself curling my hair today, which I have never done before, and after being told last night that I beat out all the fools who were auditioning against me for my role, I got a flat tire on the way to my table-read.

This seemed like as good a place as any to ask if anyone would like to change a tire for little old me.

Week one of every morning going out the park and doing some Yoga. So far, so good. I feel better. It's not helping the other areas but that's okay. My cats don't seem to care I'm lighting the apartment with light from the outside. Curtains drawn, sun coming in. It's actually really nice. Although I am thinking I need to move again.

Kind of rough it, go off grid or something.

As if almost being late to work wasn't bad enough, on account of my alarm not going off...I came home and found out that my place got robbed. Luckily, I had my laptop with me at work. However, I am now short a TV, a dad player, an Xbox and a lot of my clothes.

FML

I got rear-ended today. By a cop. And guess who he's claiming is at fault? Lil' old me.

Just great!

Gather around, children. It's time for an illustrious tale about what happens when your 'good luck' powers fail.

Your typical morning convenience store run, right? Eggs, some beer, a pack of smokes. I get there and the place is being held up by some mook. Easy enough to intervene when you're me, only... my gun jams. And I end up taking him down with a can of beans. Don't even ask.

The eggs broke on the way home when a yellow light went red too fast and they slid off the seat.

Back to the store to get more goddamned eggs and some freaking moist towelettes, another mook is trying to shoplift. I wield my trusty can of beans against the guy, slip on a leaky fridge spill (that wasn't even THERE the last time), and in the end the cops almost arrest ME when I hand the kid over.

And I forget the eggs and had to go back. Again.

I am so ready for the victory party.

It's good to be back. London was nice and it was lovely to see my Father, but here's home now. What have I missed?

SOMEONE SAID THE NAME OF THE PLAY TODAY

I tried to be a responsible student type for once. Did my homework before the weekend even really gets started, annnnnd I crunched my keyboard. To the point of where it's now unusable. And then my last save didn't actually save, so I've lost half this stupid report as it is since the whole thing restarted itself. I knew I should have procrastinated per usual.

How the hell did I fall up stairs? Sprained my wrist and scraped my palms up really good too, except that's super bad since it hurts to draw. And that's kind of what I do.

Today, you're on my list.

I need a new phone. Any suggestions?

My newest daughter, Elizabeth Jennifer Cullen was born on Wednesday, May 11th at 5:53pm. She's 7 pounds 6 oz and is 18 inches long. Both mother and baby are doing fine. Nessie is in love with her new sister. I'm so utterly and completely in love with my three girls and don't even care that I'm outnumbered 3-1.

So I get up and in the space of twenty minutes I break a nail, discover I'm out of milk, can't find my keys and missed a meeting with a supplier which I swear wasn't in my diary yesterday.

Can I just scrap this day and start over?

I thought I was the only one having a bad day, but I got on here and saw that some others had even worse bad luck than I did today. I was at the theater and a set piece almost hit me. I just managed to move in time. Then, I went to grab lunch and two kids were running around the restaurant and ran right into me, knocking my lunch all over the floor and me. I'm just glad to be home now. Hopefully nothing else will happen.