“I’ll hurt you.”
IWho: Kate & Bellatrix What: Kate pays Bella a visit When: A bit ago...Last week? Where: Bella's Condo Rating: PG-13 (Warning: Kate is being held mostly against her will for much of this. And there is stripping without consent. Also mentions of suicidal thinking. Most of the violence is reserved for the kitchen though, I think.) Status: Complete!
Kate stood in her kitchen, glaring at her phone where it rested on the counter, having a sort of one-sided stare off. After the last time, she'd swore to herself she wouldn't contact Bellatrix again. The other woman clearly didn't want to talk to her. It was better to just let it go.
And yet, here she was, fighting a losing battle with her phone over whether or not she was going to text her. This was not how she'd planned on spending her day.
Deliberately leaving her phone on the countertop, she grabbed her keys and headed for the door. It was already dark when she stepped outside, but that didn’t deter her. No particular destination in mind, she started walking.
Bellatrix had been avoiding people. Everyone. Anyone. Since she’d hurt Alyssa so badly. Whatever the girl had struck her with had done something to her. Something inside of her, and she didn’t know what yet. She’d thought she’d been burned, scarred, but her face was unchanged.
She didn’t know if she was grateful for that or not.
So she wallowed around in her condo, tormenting herself with her own torture spell.
Kate was irritable, only just refraining from muttering to herself. Not that it would have made her stand out in this city. This place wasn't exactly known for being "normal" these days. If it ever was to begin with.
She stopped suddenly, having finally realized where her aimless wandering had led her.
Fuck.
Definitely not how she'd wanted to spend her day.
Well. As long as she was here. Releasing a breath she hadn't known she was holding, she knocked on the door.
Nothing happened. No answer, no sound. At least not at first. Eventually there was shuffling, and Bellatrix opened the door. She was wearing a bathrobe and her hair hadn’t been brushed. She eyed Kate, then started to close the door on her.
Without giving it much thought, her hand shot out to keep the door from closing, and she wedged her foot against the frame. “You look like hell.”
“I feel like hell. Leave me alone, lovey.” She tried to force the door closed on her hand.
She applied a little more force of her own, just enough to hold her position. “Sorry. Can’t.”
“I’ll hurt you,” Bellatrix threatened, ice in her voice. She shoved at the door harder.
“Yeah. You’ve mentioned that.”
The woman lashed out, trying to shove Kate away by the face. There was anger in her eyes, and fear and a hundred other emotions, none of them good. She looked crazed, “GO AWAY!”
Right. Crazy. She probably should have considered that.
Kate’s first instinct was to shove back, even as she took a few steps backward, stumbling slightly. But she’d never been one to back down, digging her heels in. If anything, it made her more determined to see this through.
“You need help.”
“I don’t want any help! Especially not any help from the likes of you!” Bellatrix was shrieking now, her eyes wild and untamed.
“Yeah. Kinda got that.” Kate didn’t have much of a filter. Maybe not a lot of sense, either. “And I’m not leaving until you talk to me.”
Bellatrix pulled back from the door, stumbling over to the couch and sitting down. She buried her face in her hands and shrieked.
Progress? Kate stared blankly at the suddenly empty doorway, trying to decide.
What the hell? She’d said she wasn’t leaving. No going back now. Stepping inside, she closed the door behind her. It vaguely occurred to her that she was shutting herself in with a violent lunatic, but she pushed those thoughts aside, hesitating only briefly before moving to stand in front of said lunatic.
“If you’re finished?” See. She could be patient. Sort of. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“You’re an idiot, a stupid, goddamn bloody idiot!” Bellatrix turned towards Kate, glaring hatefully.
She’s pretty sure they already agreed on that once. And really, why else would she be here? She figured most people had the good sense to stay away. “Tell me about it.”
“No.”
Kate chuckled, even though it really wasn’t funny. Nothing about this was funny. But she was beginning to feel ridiculous. “I guess you chose the wrong fuck buddy.”
"That's all you are. A bad lay, nothing more." Bella felt the nigh unresistable urge to kill her.
“Funny. You never complained before.”
“Wand!” Her wand shot to her hand and she pointed it at Kate.
Okay. That made her a little uneasy. A lot uneasy. Kate eyed the wand, now mostly ignoring the woman wielding it. “Maybe you really are heartless.”
“That’s right. I’m heartless. I’m a heartless bitch. I don’t deserve to love.” Every time she loved, it turned out bad.
“I thought you didn’t care? You never loved me. It was just fucking, right?”
Dragging her attention from the wand, she sought the other woman’s eyes. “I don’t know. Maybe you’re right. Maybe you’ve been right all along. Maybe you don’t deserve love. But maybe you deserve a friend.”
The tip of the wand glowed red as Bellatrix opened her mouth to cast a spell.
Of course desperate pleading was going to get her nowhere. But she’d already known that, hadn’t she? She thought she probably should have.
“I’m not asking you to love me.”
“I don’t.” Bellatrix shot off a hex, barely missing Kate.
She knew this was a bad idea. She should have just stayed home. But, no, she had to antagonize the woman who was very probably trying to kill her.
“I think we already established that!” Because yelling is really going to help, Kate. Why couldn’t they just talk? You know. Like normal people. “I’m just trying to help.”
“I don’t want help! Crucio!” The forbidden curse missed, but Bellatrix was raising her wand to try again. Her vision blurred, making it hard to aim.
“Are you insane?”
Kate wasn’t usually one to back down. But at this point, running was beginning to seem like n excellent option. Or it would have, if she’d actually had anywhere to run. Smart move, Kate.
This was probably punishment for cheating.
“You’re going to kill someone! Is that what you want?”
“Who says I haven’t already?” Bellatrix strutted towards Kate. She flicked her wand, casting a levitate spell on the woman so she couldn’t run anyway.
That solved that problem. It was also rather distracting. And a bit uncomfortable. Because now there really was nowhere to go. And that was definitely not normal. It was becoming decidedly harder to focus on talking the witch down.
But wait.
"Have you?"
“Yes.” She started to strip Kate.
She wasn't panicking. Not at all. Okay maybe a little.
"Why are you doing this?"
“To prove a point, Kate. To prove what I am.”
"Why do you need to prove anything?"
She smiled, a little deranged. “To prove to you that I can’t be saved. I don’t want to be saved. Not..not anymore.” Which meant at one point she’d wanted to be saved.
Except she could have tortured Kate at anytime, and she kept missing. Bellatrix rarely missed. Not this close.
Kate wasn’t sure that made her feel better. “That’s what this is about?”
“I need to die,” she replied, simply. “That’s my fate.”
"Then pull the trigger."
“I’ve tried. They won’t let me.”
Well maybe if she’d quit trying to take them down with her. “They?”
“Everyone. People who profess to care.” Bellatrix started to circle Kate, inspecting her, her fingers itching to do something. Anything was better than nothing. But every time she would move to hurt her, something inside her stopped her.
Her eyes followed the movement, feeling very much like prey. “You mean they won’t do it for you. Maybe that should tell you something.”
“The definition of madness is doing something and expecting a different result. So why do you keep bloody coming here?”
“You’re right. I’m an idiot.” The truth was, she wished she knew. She knew better than most you couldn’t help someone who didn’t want to be helped.
Bellatrix trailed her wand down Kate’s spine, leaning in to follow the motion with her tongue. The truth was, she was doing some things by rote. She didn’t know any other way to be.
As much as she hated to admit it, she was scared, maybe feeling a little desperate. Unfortunately for Kate, it came across more like frustrated anger.
“Hey, you wanna kill yourself, fine. But don’t take me down with you.”
“But that’s the best part, lovey. Who wants to go out, alone?” Bellatrix smirked.
“Prove you’re better than that.”
“How!?”
“Let someone in.”
“Go to hell.”
“So what? That’s it?” She was a little too frustrated to remember self-preservation. “Someone actually gives a damn whether you live or die, and that’s who you want to drag to hell with you? That is seriously messed up.”
She threw up her hands. "She gets it! She finally gets it. I'm seriously messed up!"
“That doesn’t mean you can’t change.”
“I don’t want to,” she replied, petulantly.
“Then why am I still here?”
“...I don’t know.”
“Figure it out. Maybe you’ll realize you want to change more than you think.”
“I don’t want to change.” Bellatrix was stubborn. And lying through her teeth.
“Then why are you doing this to yourself?”
"I don't know how else to be!! How clear is that?!"
"Not knowing how to change isn't the same as not wanting to be different. You don't have to do this."
“What do you think I’m doing.” Bellatrix walked behind Kate again. She didn’t want to be seen.
“Using me.”
“You’re wrong. If I was using you, you’d know.” But maybe she was? Using her to further whatever mad ends she thought she wanted.
“Yeah. I thought so, too.”
“God, I hate you.” She punched Kate in the back, and stormed off into the kitchen.
The unexpected blow made her breath catch, and Bellatrix was gone before she’d recovered enough to be angry. “Ow.”
Right. This would be a hell of a lot less frustrating if she were on the ground. Or if she could do something. She didn’t have any genius ideas about how she might remedy that.
There was banging and rattling in the kitchen, along with shrieks and even what sounded like sobs.
Kate waited, for once mindful of what she was saying and when she was saying it. Her tendency to speak first and think later hadn’t done her many favors here. But she got impatient quickly, sounding more bored than desperate now. She was out of options and nearly resigned to whatever was coming.
“So…Just going to leave me hanging here?”
The banging in the kitchen got louder, and soon it was apparent that Bella was trashing the other room, taking out her anger and frustration on the innocent kitchen, instead of on Kate.
Crazy. Right. But hey, at least she wasn’t taking the beating. There was nothing for her to do now but wait.
And wait Bellatrix made her. It took an hour for the fit to subside,and another twenty minutes before she emerged. She carried a plate of toast, and held it out for Kate. “Eat.”
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“EAT.” With caps.
“All right! Chill! I’ll eat. But could you at least get me down from here, first?”
“No.” She waved her hand, though, giving Kate back the use of her hands.
Well that was…something at least. But she was really beginning to realize how much she took solid ground for granted. She snatched at the toast, her temper getting the best of her again.
“I’m not going to run, you know.”
“Just bloody eat!” Despite her tone, Bella seemed a lot more calm.
Grumbling, she started on the toast, making it very obvious she was unhappy about it. She didn’t like being told what to do.
Bellatrix watched her like a hawk, eyes blazing. When Kate was done, she looked satisfied. “Are you okay?”
“Couldn’t be better.” It was only slightly sarcastic, her tone losing its edge.
“Good...” Bellatrix fidgeted with her hands. “Drink?”
"I'm fine. Thanks."
“Okay..” Bellatrix sat on the couch, leaning back and crossing her legs. She looked at Kate like a spider might it’s prey.
"What now?"
Bella waved a hand, and the levitation spell vanished. “I don’t care.”
"A warning might've been nice." But at least she was on solid ground again.
And now it was awkward.
"Sure you don't want to...kick me out now or something?"
Bellatrix shrugged her shoulder. The fight had gone out of her. Whatever side of her that wasn’t batshit crazy had won, at least for now.
"Thanks. I guess."
Kate shifted uncomfortably, suddenly uncertain.
"Do you want me to go?"
“Don’t care.” She looked at Kate. “But if you stay I might hurt you.”
She shrugged. "Well, maybe I don't want to leave."
“Stay then.” She sounded petulant again.
She hesitated a fraction of a second, then nodded. After a minute of indecision, she moved to sit opposite Bella, hoping she was giving her enough space.
"I don't have a lot to get back to anyway."
Bellatrix turned the tv on, and pointedly ignored Kate.
Two could play that game. Crossing her arms, Kate sat back in her seat and turned her attention to the television.