Cadence (princesscadence) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-02-21 13:49:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, kurt wagner (nightcrawler), princess cadance |
if anything comes from this... I’m glad that it was with you.
Who: Cadence and Kurt
When: Valentine’s Day
Where: His place
What: She's making him dinner at his place
Rating: NSFW - Sex and freaking out about condom breaking.
Status: complete
Cadence didn’t want to have things be awkward for Valentine’s Day. She’d text’d to make sure that he was home, the collected up some shopping and her overnight bag, and headed straight to his place. Of course, he had a car now and could come get her, but after the way that turned out last time with her Sisters asking her all kinds of questions, she’d rather avoid it today. Valentine’s Day was bad enough around the House as it was. So much gossip. She decided to avoid it all.
So she was wearing a red sweater and a black skirt, standing on his doorstep with fresh produce and meat, ready to make him a fantastic dinner. Her overnight bag was slung over her shoulder, a clean pair of clothes for tomorrow. Just in case.
She knocked, and waited for him to answer.
Kurt opened the door, wearing a freshly washed pair of slacks and a grey polo shirt. He smiled cheerfully at her. “You know you don’t need to cook for me. Not that I vill complain.” He stepped aside to let her come in. His hair seemed a little different, shining with an almost blue hue in the sunlight. And his ears weren’t as round as they’d been previously.
Not that Cadence noticed. She entered his home and leaned up and in to tap a kiss against his cheek. “I like cooking, and I like you,” she flushed, “so it’s a win-win.” Then she headed straight for the kitchen, setting her things down on the counter.
He followed her, a smile on his face. "I have news."
“What news?” Cadence asked, returning his smile with one of her own. She started to unpack and prepare to cook dinner for the both of them.
"I'm going back to school this spring!" He sidled up behind her, nuzzling her neck and hugging her.
“That’s wonderful!” Cadence said, stopping what she was doing to turn around in his arms. she lifted hers to wrap up and around him, hugging him in against her. “Where? What are you going to study?”
“UC Irvine. I vant to study electrical engineering. I’ve always been good vith my hands, and vith some of the things I’ve dreamed of I think I have a knack for it.” Repairing Blackbirds, and all.
“Dreamed?” They hadn’t really talked about the dreams yet, but Cadence had seen some of the dreams mentioned on Valarnet. “Tell me more about your dreams.”
“Vhich ones?” He pulled back, getting himself a water. He thought about the dreams, wondering if there an easy way to explain them. “I’m kind of a superhero!”
“Kind of?” Cadence asked, grinning. She turned back to the food. She was making chicken stir fry tonight with vegetables and rice. Shouldn’t take much work, everything was washed and ready to be cut and cooked. She pulled out the chicken and veggies and started at it. “I think you’re a superhero in your waking life, not just in your dreams.”
"They're called the X-men. Ve go on many adventures together. I dream of one of my friends, and he's there too." He thought of Logan. He wasn't much different, just gruffer and a lot more terrifying in a bar fight. Kurt blushed, and laughed. "Ja? I'm not blue."
“Blue? You’re blue in your dreams?” Cadence asked, grinning, as she chopped the vegetables and tossed them into a bowl. The skillet was heating up for the chicken, the rice already underway. She turned to glance over her shoulder at him, then gave a startled yelp, and dropped her knife. She’d just sliced her finger open. It wasn’t too bad, she wouldn’t need stitches, but it was surprising and hurt like heck.
“Blue, ja.” At the sound of her yelp, he’d lept across the kitchen with greater agility than he should be capable of, taking her hand and looking at it.
Cadence winced when he took her hand. “I’m so... clumsy.” She said, then stepped to the sink to run some water over it. It stung terribly, and was bleeding.
“Shh...” He helped her take care of her hand, then bandaged it. Then he kissed it. “All better, ja?” Just being close to her made him think of anything but wanting to be near her. To kiss her, and touch her. He kissed her cheek, then her forehead.
Cadence gave a nod. “Thank you.” She leaned in against him, then kissed his cheek in return. And his jaw. And soon her lips were pressing against his.
Kurt’s arms threaded around Cadence as she kissed his jaw, and then his lips. With a soft groan he lifted her into the air, forcing the kiss deeper. A romantic, bodice ripping I need you and I’ve always needed you sort of kiss. In his dreams he loved quite a few women, but it never seemed to work out, not when he’d wanted it to. He was afraid the same could happen with this woman.
Cadence couldn’t help but whimper into the kiss. Her legs lifted to wrap around him, arms tangled around him, hands in his hair. She clung to him as if she was drowning and he was an oxygen tank.
There was still food on the stove.
Food was forgotten as Kurt pressed Cadence against the counter, kissing her as if the nature of life, the universe and everything was on her lips and in her mouth. His hand slid under her shirt, fingers dancing like little bolts of lightning on her skin.
It took a moment, especially with his hands on her skin, but Cadence remembered the food. She pulled her mouth away from his, her heart thundering and her legs a little numb. “...Kurt,” she nearly moaned, kissing along his jaw. “...I should finish cooking...” They could pick this up again later, when the chicken on the stove wouldn’t cause a house fire.
He made a sound half between a groan and a laugh, and pulled away, carefully lowering her leg (and stealing a quick grope as he did so). “Okay, okay. I’ll let you finish cooking. Just remember vhere ve left off, ja?”
“How could I forget that?” Cadence breathed. Her hand untangled from his hair, her body from his, though she was incredibly turned on now, and sincerely hoped she wouldn’t cut any more fingers in her distraction.
She reluctantly pulled away from him and moved back to the stove to continue her preparations. The chicken was going to be over-cooked.
Kurt watched her for a moment, before moving to help get drinks and the table set. It was a little hard to walk, but he’d just have to deal with it. He’d had to ‘deal’ with it a lot lately, but he wasn’t the kind of man who generally got too upset by it.
Cadence threw the meal together quickly, thanking God very grateful that she’d opted for the two minute rice, or whatever. It was faster than cooking rice from scratch. It only took another five minutes to dish up plates and sit at the table to eat.
“I hope you’re hungry. There’s enough here to feed an army. I guess you can freeze the leftovers for during the week.” She always cooked for far too many people. Coming from such a huge family, that’s just how she learned.
Kurt smiled at her. “That’s vhat I always do.” It had saved him so much in buying TV dinners, and was a lot healthier. He was more than happy to take advantage of her...delicious food.
Cadence didn’t mind being taken advantage of. Really. She started in on her supper, though she had a different kind of appetite now.
Kurt ate, with an eye towards both fueling himself and also not being too full for later. If there was a later. He wasn’t going to assume. Hope, yes. Definitely hoping. “Gott, this is delicious.” And there was so much of it, it was kinda of ridiculous. She wasn’t kidding! He looked across the table at her.
“I’m glad you like it.” Cadence thought her cooking was mediocre at best, though she did grow up the daughter (and younger sister of) a chef. Several, actually. Her father had gone to culinary school after starting his business, and several of her brothers followed suit. They kept the Taco King trucks and now brick-and-mortar restaurants in the family.
“I’ll help you package up the rest for freezer meals.” She didn’t mind bringing food over to cook for him. It’d save him money on fast food, and it was a lot healthier for him. She needed him to have his strength. Especially for nights like tonight. Speaking of...
“We should um...” She paused. “We should clean this up quickly so we can get back to where we left off.” Her cheeks were bright red now.
Kurt swallowed, and then nodded,jumping to his feet. He started to clean in record time, and with record speed. “As you vish, liebchen.” He winked at her, referencing one of the first movies they’d seen together.
Cadence grinned at the Princess Bride reference. One of her favorites. One of his, too. She helped him dish up the leftovers into tupperwares, and put them in the freezer. She did a lot of cleaning as she went along cooking, so it was fast work. And he was moving at near super-human speeds.
When it was all done, she picked up her overnight bag from the floor and turned to him with a shy smile.
He took a deep breath, picking her up and carrying her down the hallway and to his bedroom. Kurt started to kiss her as he crossed the threshhold, one of his hands sneaking back up into her shirt. He stroked along the edge of her bra and grinned as he sat them down on the bed.
Cadence gave a laugh as she was swept up into his arms. She wrapped her own around him and clung tightly, then dropped her bag over the edge of the bed and settled in his lap, kissing him soundly as his fingers teased along her bra.
She wanted this. She wanted him. And she made it obvious by not hesitating this time. Not worrying, not letting her fears get the better of her.
Kurt groaned her name. Her lack of hesitation was turning him on more. He shifted back farther on the bed, pulling her with him and on top of him. Kurt made out with her, hands stroking along her body and inside her shirt. Her skin was absolutely amazing.
Cadence moved with him, bringing one arm down to hold herself up above him as they kissed. Hungrily. There was no hesitation, no reservation, nothing but hunger, lust and love. She pulled back away from him for just a moment and tugged her shirt up and over her head, then tossed it aside before kissing him again.
He followed her movements with his eyes, before their lips locked again. He worked her bra off and tossed it to the side, grasping at her breasts with his fingers, squeezing gently at first, and then with greater need and urgency. Kurt bit and sucked at her lips and her jaw.
She rolled onto her side so she could free up her hands to tug at his clothing, finding the fasten on his pants and working at it as he kissed her lips, her jaw. She stretched her head back a bit to expose her neck to him, wanting more. So much more. She couldn’t describe or define the sensation. There was guilt there. And excitement, but mostly passion. Mostly love.
Muttering sweet nothings in German, Kurt left bite marks along her neck and throat, and then licked at her collar bone. He loved the taste of her, the sweet saltiness of her skin and how amazing her skin tone looked in any lighting. His mouth found a breast, and his lips nipped at the tip.
Her hands faltered at the feel of his mouth against her skin, his lips teasing and caressing her nipple. It perked up at his attention, and goosebumps rose along the skin of her breast, chest and arm. She was breathing heavily now, her heartbeat thundering in her chest, and for the life of her she couldn’t focus long enough to get his pants unfastened.
So her hands moved to her own. She could get those undone much easier, and gave them a shove down over her hips.
Groaning, Kurt's hand slid down her stomach, teasing and caressing, until it moved over the skin of her pelvis and the silky hair there. He wanted her ready, he wanted her to feel like a princess and a queen and the center of his world. He didn't even work at his own pants. His other hand was on her other breast. Cadence was the only thing in his world right now.
She wriggled a little and slid her pants down over her thighs, just low enough so she could kick them the rest of the way off. Not the sexiest way to remove pants in the world, but it accomplished what she wanted to have happen. And then his warm, strong, rough hand was touching her in a very soft, sensitive, private area, and she couldn’t help but give a little moan. Her legs spread for him, seemingly of their own accord. She wanted more. Her hand tangled in his hair, drawing his face in against hers to kiss him deeply, hungrily, begging him for more.
Kurt kissed her, his fingers deftly touching and caressing at her private areas. He knew where to touch her, especially now that he’d done it once, but he drew it out, wanting to make her beg, wanting to make her forget everything but the moment. All her inhibitions, all her worries and fears, he wanted to erase them. It wasn’t long before he’d pushed his pants down, a mix between sheer want and need, and trying to avoid chafing. He guided her hand, gasping as soon as her fingers made contact.
It was a good thing that Kurt was so willing to help her. To show her what he wanted her to do. Cadence really had no idea how to do... any of this. She let her fingers wrap around him, bringing her lips to his neck, to his shoulder. Her hips tipped in against his hand, whimpering as she kissed and suckled his shoulder.
The man was hellbent on taking Cadence to heaven. His fingers worked madly, lovingly and Kurt suckled at her. He jerked into her hand with a loud groan. He rasped. "Love you..."
Cadence gasped when he hit an exceptionally good spot. Her hips bucked gently, and she gasped, feeling his fingers touch that spot again. She tried to keep her hand moving against him, but he was so distracting. A whimper escaped her. "More," she breathed. "Please."
Kurt laughed softly, and pushed her onto her back, his fingers searching more deepy, pushing in and seeking her center. "How much more! This gutt ja?"
She rolled happily onto her back, settling down against the pillows. "Oh, Kurt," she moaned. "This is so good. So good."
"I love you," he breathed. Kurt shifted his fingers around, his body quivering. He kissed her, then again and again. He played with her until he couldn't stand it, and then he kept doing so until she couldn't stand it.
“I love you,” she returned, just as breathy, just as meaningful, then lifted her head to meet his kiss. It was hungry and passionate. She thought perhaps he was trying to make her go crazy, and he probably was. The pleasure and passion were building within her, pressure reaching a breaking point. She closed her eyes and willed it to come--silently begged her body for release. When the release happened, it was more amazing than the last time. She bucked forward, face scrunched into an O, explosions within her white hot and making her gasp and shudder.
Kurt breathed into her ear, “I need you, Cadence. Gott but I need you. I vant to be vith you right now.”
Cadence nodded, riding that climax through. Her whole body was humming, and started to relax down against the bed. “...do you have any condoms?” She managed. The last time they’d gone without, and she’d freaked out for a week.
“Somevhere,” He said, and started to laugh as he rolled off of her, reached for the end table. He was glad she remembered, and cursed himself for getting too into it for either of their goods.
Cadence could breathe for a moment. It was a relief that he was getting one, that they could do this again, more safely this time. Though, the lack of body heat, his body against hers, made her feel a little chilly, she did like watching him move to the end table. He was so very attractive to her, and she wasn’t lying when she said she loved him.
He bounced back onto the bed, sitting next to her and nuzzling at her body, wanting to feel her warmth. He also wanted the condom to be a team effort, and took her hand, guiding it so she could help him get it on.
Cadence had done this with a banana once in a high school health class. But it was different when it was her boyfriend’s hard length, and her hands were shaking slightly with nerves and excitement. She helped him get the thing on, then rolled onto her back again and tugged him with her. She was shivering now from emotion.
Kurt kissed her softly and gently, and lovingly as he lay on top of the woman. His fingers twined with hers , before he pushed himself up and gazed down at her trying to read her face to see if she really was okay with doing this again.
She really was okay with doing this again. Her eyes met his, and she smiled up at him. She felt so good. So in love, so amazing. She lifted her knees on either side of him, and pulled him in close against her with her thighs. It was kinda hot having her hands pinned by his with their fingers twined.
He gently entered her, leaning down to kiss with equal gentleness. Kurt groaned at the feel of her, praying to someone that it would be as wonderful for her.
It was better this time. Much better. She’d done this with him once before, and since then she’d done some experimenting with fingers on her own. She didn’t want to hurt or to be afraid again. He was wearing a condom, and he was kissing her, and she stretched to admit him inside her. And, much to her pleasant surprise, it felt good this time. She broke her lips from his to gasp.
Pleased, Kurt's fingers tightened in Cadence’s and he kissed her chin, moaning softly as he sank into her. A breath, and a heartbeat, and then he began to move, lifting his face to gaze into her eyes and watch her expressions.
There was still a little discomfort. But this time was a lot better than before. Cadence arched her back just a little, gasping gently as he moved. She was pinned down, forced to focus on how it felt as he thrusted. Her eyes were closed at first, but opened and looked up into his.
He gazed down, smiling at her, his breath starting to come in ragged gasps mixed with moans of pleasure. Kurt rocked his hips faster, and a little harder, moving in deliberately long strokes. It felt much better this time. He wasn’t hurting her. He could enjoy it without the guilt.
Kurt could enjoy her. He kissed her, loving and passionate.
Her eyes closed as she kissed him back, finding that he was hitting good spots, finding that her pleasure was rising again. She wasn’t sure she would peak once more, but it didn’t hurt this time, and that alone was a big improvement.
Letting go with one hand, Kurt slid it down her torso, and across her stomach, stroking and teasing at her skin as he made love to her. He did it with his hand, too. Making love to her skin with his palm and his fingers.
That extra stimulation helped. Cadence gave a little whimper into the kiss, clenching down around him as pleasure started to grow again. She gasped and tore her lips away from his. “Oh, Kurt,” she breathed, nodding.
He groaned something in a mixture of German and English, his movements becoming jerky for a few moments before he recovered. He gently grasped at her waist, lifting her hips up and shifting into a position that allowed him greater depth. Kurt started to move faster.
The greater depth was pretty amazing, too. Cadence moved with him, lifting her hips and gasping at how deep he could go. Her toes curled and she gasped. “...moremoremoremore,” she moaned gently, her body doing the unexpected. She didn’t think this could happen, but she felt it coming. Her back arched and she willed the pleasure to grow. And grow it did. If he kept it up for just another few moments she might come again.
He would be able to hold off. He swore he would be able to hold off. It was just growing more and more impossible for him to hold it off. “I love you...I love you Cadence.” He kissed her again, moving faster and harder, gasping her name repeatedly. He would..hold..off...if it killed him.
She returned his kiss as best she could, even though the sensations were overwhelming. And she had to break her lips away from his to gasp. It was more like she cried out, really, as her body went completely taut and the pleasure washed over her. She bucked up against him, clenching down around his length inside her. It wasn’t quite as powerful as the one he brought on with his hand, but it was still good. Very, very good. It made her moan and whimper, writhing, pinned underneath his body.
The whole effect brought him over with her. The tightness and her writhing moans and wihimpers. Kurt cried out her name as his release ripped through him. He gasped, flopping ontop of her and rested his nose against her ear.
She came down, gasping, body still shivering with pleasure. A sigh escaped her once her climax had finished, and she wrapped both arms up and around him. Then she turned to kiss him. It was sloppy and happy and very loving.
“Love you,” He murmured, sighing happily. He really had no desire to move, but he had to, eventually. And cursed vividly in German when he pulled out.
The whole world went cold when he pulled out and moved away. She whimpered and clung to him, but let him go after a moment, and reached for the blankets.
Kurt wrapped his arms around Cadence, and pressed his lips into her shoulder as they pulled the blankets up. He wanted to wait a little bit, before breaking the mood and telling her the condom broke.
Cadence cuddled close against him, closed her eyes and sighed. Her arm wrapped down and around his middle, her body pressed close up against his. She kissed his neck, then nuzzled her nose against his warm, soft skin.
"I love you too," he said, sounding strained. She wasn't going to like what he had to say.
"Hmm?" She asked. Why did he sounds like he was fighting saying something?
He sighed, "don't panic, liebchen. But the condom broke."
...'Don't panic'?? How could she not? She opened her eyes and pulled back to look at him, panicked and horror struck. "What?"
He gave her a tired, weary smile. "It'll be all right. I promise." Their luck sucked.
"How?" She asked, pulling the sheet up and around her as she say up in bed. The was just... Not worth the risk. She buried her face in her hands. "What... What are we gonna do?" Maybe if she took a shower and flushed it out with water...
"Ve are getting you on the pill, to start in case this happens again." Kurt said with a sigh. "And ve are going to be okay. Cadence?"
Cadence was still trying to figure out if she should flush out her privates when he said her name. She looked into his eyes a moment. "I should shower."
"Showering vill not change anything," Kurt said gently. "Ve vould need a pill. And that vould only work before its too late."
“No.” Cadence said, and shook her head. “I don’t want to...” She paused. “If I end up pregnant, then I’m keeping it.” It was probably a conversation they should have had before sex without protection and sex with broken protection. “I won’t... do that.”
Kurt shook his head. “If you’re already pregnant, this von’t stop it. If you’re not pregnant, it vill make sure you don’t get pregnant to begin vith. I’m talking about plan B, not an abortion. If you are pregnant, then I vant to keep it vith you.”
“I don’t know.” Cadence said, shaking her head. She wished she didn’t have to think about it. She wished she didn’t have to make these difficult decisions. She felt like she was about to cry.
Kurt wrapped his arms around her, and started to rock. He felt guilty. Like he didn’t deserve her. He was just causing her stress.
She was pretty stressed. But it wasn’t his fault. Not entirely. She leaned against him a little with his arms around her. “...this was a mistake.” She whispered. She’d always thought that she would wait until she was married to have sex for the first time. And now she was realizing why. These fears wouldn’t be terrifying. They wouldn’t be fears. It would just be... God’s plan. Making a family. Exciting, not terrifying. Well, perhaps a little terrifying, but in an expected way.
“I’m sorry, Kurt.” She said, shaking her head. “I do love you.”
“It vasn’t a mistake.” Kurt said, feeling his stomach flip and his chest fall. He brought his hands to her face. “It vasn’t. It feels right in my heart.”
She brought her eyes to his. “...I don’t... if it was so right, why would I be so scared?”
"Because you're vorried about vhat others might think. You're vorried you'll go further from god." And he wondered if maybe she hadn’t been ready at all. It was a painful thought.
Maybe she hadn’t. Maybe she was now a bit more broken than she’d been before. “I’m scared that my life is turning upside down. I’m scared that I’m gonna... I don’t know.” She couldn’t even put it into words. She didn’t want to be a young, unwed mother. She didn’t want to have to drop out of school to get a minimum wage job to support a child. She didn’t want to see the look on her father’s face if that happened, or her brothers, or...
Then again, she could do it if she had to. Cadence would be an incredible mother. She was full of love and patience, and she was absolutely crazy about children. She swallowed.
“It’s all happening really fast.”
"Ja..." he watched all that fly across her face, though he could only guess as to what she was thinking. "Ve should slow down, you think?"
“Can we?” She asked, turning her eyes back up to look into his. She was afraid that she’d lose him if she suggested it.
Kurt nodded his head. It wasn’t necessarily the route he wanted to go, but he would bow to her wishes. He cared about her enough to respect that.
“Okay.” She said, nodding. She was relieved that he wasn’t going to kick her out, or yell at her, or call her a tease for suggesting it. She was still scared, still nervous that they’d just accidentally made a baby and there was nothing she could would do about it, but now she was feeling relieved, full of love. There was a lot of guilt, too, at what she’d done to him. “I’m really sorry, Kurt, I thought I was ready.”
“I should have thought that you veren’t.” Kurt pulled her closer, resting his face against her cheek. He sounded deeply apologetic.
She was still tangled up in the sheet, and she was thankful for the covering, considering her clothes were scattered all over the room. “I forced myself upon you. It’s not your fault.” She said, softly. Then she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him down on the bed with her once more, leaning back against the pillows.
Kurt laughed against her skin. “Nien, I vas very villing and very able.”
Cadence chuckled softly, blushing a bit. “...Well, anyway.” She said, running her hand up and down his arm, tugging it around her a little more tightly. “Thank you for being so understanding.”
“Vhat kind of man vould I be if I vasn’t understanding?” He kissed the side of her face, and then her hair. “I’ll just need more shower time.”
“Okay.” Cadence said, blushing and grinning brightly at the kiss to her face, to her hair. She turned and smiled as she looked into his eyes. “I love you.” She said, softly, then leaned in and kissed his lips. “And... if anything comes from this... I’m glad that it was with you.”
“Ja. And maybe someday it vill be!”
“Maybe.” Cadence blushed further. Her heartbeat sped up at that idea.