InsaneJournal

Who: Azula and Zuko. Special guest appearance by Draco Malfoy
When: Wednesday night.
Where: Out at a club, and then Draco’s apartment.
What: Azula wants to find Zuko a girlfriend. And then she doesn’t.
Rating: A for AWKWARD. Also pg 13 for swearings and talks of sexy type things.
Status: Complete





She’d said she wanted to take her brother out to a club, and she planned on following through with her word. There were mistakes she’d made and dreamed about constantly. Her brother was one of them. That didn’t mean she was going to treat him with kid gloves. He was still Zuzu after all. She didn’t respect him, not yet. Not until he proved he had the balls to face her, one on one.

Someday.

She wore a short skirt with a slinky top, that she’d seen online during one of her ‘try to find things to wear that offset the awkward’ phases. Just because she was going to throw Zuko at some girls didn’t mean she wasn’t hoping to score either. She drove up to Zuko’s place in her red Mazda Miata, and honked the horn.

Why on Earth Zuko had agreed to go out with his younger sister was completely beyond him. He wasn’t exactly a social butterfly. Nor was he exactly on the best terms with his family (although if he had to think on it, he supposed at this point he didn’t really have anything against his sister in general, except for the fact that she was his sister). Still, he had some kind of urge to see her, against his better judgement.

Exiting his condo (well, his fathers generally abandoned one that he called his own), he walked up to her car, rolling his eyes. Of course she had a fancy car while he had none at all. “Hi,” he said to her, resisting the urge to say something catty about her state of dress as he slipped into the passenger's seat.

"Hey. You actually don't look like crap." It was her attempt to compliment him. It probably didn't succeed. She pulled out into traffic with little regard for the safety of those around her. She reached into her purse, and pulled out a card, flipping it around in her fingers as she held it out. Azula gave her fingers a slight charge. "Your fake ID. You'll need it."

“Gee, thanks,” he said dryly, not really taking to a compliment of that degree. He took the proffered ID, more than a little shocked at the spark it gave off. He gave her a dirty look, not sure if it was her fault or not; but made no verbal note of it; it was never worth arguing with Azula. He inspected it for a moment. “It looks real,” he noted. “Where’d you get it?”

He was pointedly not looking out the window of the car, her driving had never been … uh. Great.

Azula smirked, as though she had a secret, and he wasn't allowed to know about it. "I know some people who know some people, don't worry about it." She waved a hand dismissively, taking a left turn at a yield and narrowly avoiding a collision. "It'll work and that's what's important."

He eyed her, looking a bit grumpy about the response. “Right,” he said, sarcasm dripping from his tone. Of course, it was all ruined by the fact that he had to grab for the Oh Shit handle in a little panic. “Jesus fuck, who taught you to drive?” They would never make it to the club. He was going to die. Who would tell Draco?

Okay, that was a bit extreme, but still.

Azula tilted her head back, laughing. “Who do you think? Uncle Iroh!”

She sped down an expressway, before taking them around to a block filled with clubs and nightlife. If there was any kind of club you could find, there was probably one here. She parked, and shut the engine off. "If you wet the seat then I'll be angry."

“Shut up,” he told her, because when it came down to it, they were really just siblings, and it was a younger sisters’ job to be the most annoying person on the planet. And it figured that their uncle had taught her to drive; the man was terribly lenient in comparison to their own father and had probably thought her speeding funny.

He got out of the car, straightened his dress shirt and tie with his hands and peered around the streets. “Did you have one in mind?” Frankly, every club looked the same to him. His sister was more the party type. He was more the sit in the corner and brood angrily type.

"I'm not sure. We can't go into that one. You're practically a girl, but I think the lesbians would object." She hooked her purse around her shoulder and started towards one in particular. It seemed to be a mixed sort of club, and she thought she'd be more comfortable and less prone to embarrassing herself in it than some of the others.

Ugh. Zuko stuck his new fake ID in his wallet and trailed after his younger sister. Not because she was leading, but because he couldn’t be bothered to give a damn. She was a hell of a lot more wild than him; in all the months since he’d left he’d mellowed out to the point where he thought that spending the night reading fun. Apparently, the same could not be said for Azula. He narrowed his eyes at her back, going for the catty which he’d turned down earlier. “I know you could have afforded a bit more clothing than that.” Little sisters weren’t supposed to dress like that.

"Oh, burn." She glanced back at him, eyes flashing. "Did you really just say that to me? You're just jealous that you could never look this good."

Azula sighed, like this was all a great imposition on her. "I might have to bribe a girlfriend for you."

“I don’t want a girlfriend,” Zuko said, slightly shocked to think that that might have been her mission for the night. He crossed his arms, annoyed even as they skipped the waiting line for the club straight to the bouncer.

Azula flashed her ID, and the man let them in. She walked into the club, looking like she owned the place, and looked around. Writhing bodies and techno, flashing lights strobing. There were even lasers. "You don't want a girlfriend, Zuzu? I'm trying to get my big brother tail, and he doesn't want any." She shook her head at him.

Zuko was looking around the club, nearly disgusted with the strobe lights and the people -- and also somewhat interested in the scene at the same time. Bizarre. “I didn’t say-- no,” he sidestepped someone who looked stupid drunk, and rose his voice to be heard over the noise. “I’m dating someone. I don’t need you to find me some -- some--” lost for a word, he gestured to the people on the dancefloor.

"I'm not sure I heard you correctly. You're dating someone? As in date date? Why didn't anyone tell me this?" She turned on him, leaning close in order to be heard. "Little Zuzu found a girlfriend on his own! I'm in utter shock!"

This, of course, from miss "you dress so sharp you could sink a battleship."

Zuko did have the grace to look embarrassed about that. “You never asked,” he said a little pointedly even as he weaved his way through the crowd to get to the bar. Drinks were in order. And then he gave a delicate cough that was certainly lost to the noise in the bar. Possibly it was swallowed up by a laser. “And I don’t have a girlfriend.”

"But you said you were dating someone." Azula furrowed her brow, then her mouth hung open for a second before she covered it with her hand. Her shoulders shook as she struggled to contain laughter. She failed, and threw her head back, practically cackling.

She held up a hand as she caugh her breath. Then she asked, "Is he cute?"

Since this was apparently of import.

Apparently. Zuko frowned (he was very good at frowning) and fought against the rising distaste in the back of his throat. He didn’t like being laughed at, especially not about something like this. He wouldn’t let himself be baited though. “Yes,” he said, motioning the bartender over with an air of authority he rarely used. “He is cute. He’s blond. His name is Draco.”

"If Father found out..." Azula warned, the expression on her face seeming to be sincere. Anything less than perfection from his children was unacceptable, and this was something that he couldn't ignore.

Yeah, Zuko had been a little (read: a lot) concerned about that as well. Their father didn’t take to deviance of any sort, and Zuko highly doubted he’d forgive his eldest son being a sexual deviant. For a moment, he looked quite worried, and was tempted to nearly beg her not to say anything to him. He only changed his mind at the very last second. He scowled. “What? He’ll burn the rest of my face off?”

"If you're lucky." Azula folded her arms, wondering if Zuko realized just how much leverage he'd given her. Excepting of course, her own deviances. She wasn't sure if it would be more advantageous to keep them to herself, or offer as a bargaining chip to Zuko. Better to tell her himself, than have him find out on his own to hang over her head?

Zuko rolled his eyes, feeling upset with her, their father and himself all at the same time. Of course, there was no better way to deal with being upset than by drinking. The bartender returned with drinks, and he handed one to his sister (who he should have been concerned was drinking at all, but fuck it). “Yeah,” he said, not even really sure how to respond to that. She wasn’t even being bitchy about it this time around, it was just the truth. “Probably.”

She swirled her drink, looking down into it, a solemn, slightly morose expression on her face. She took a sip, and sounded about as somber as she had on Ember Island, in front of the campfire.

"You know, Zuzu, we finally have something in common." She took another sip, not looking at him.

She looked serious, and whilst sometimes she did that and even meant it, years of growing up with her had made him a bit way on the topic. Still, he didn’t rush in completely rudely. He tried his drink, only now aware that he wasn’t even sure what he’d asked for. “...Is this the part where you point out we both like men?” He asked, cautious.

"This is the part where I point out that I've always been terrible at talking to boys." Azula replied, waving a hand. "I suppose they're still attractive. Just less attractive than...other things. To me. That would upset father. If he knew."

Oh. Well. Zuko had his own little moment of staring with a side order of jaw dropping. Now everything made sense. It was... comforting, in it’s own right. “Well,” he said, and raised his glass in a vague motion of cheers. “What he doesn’t know can’t hurt us,” he said. And suddenly, the loudness of the place, and the lasers and stupid rave lights didn’t really bother him at all.

The disappointing part was that one or both of them would be expected to carry on the family line. Azula knew she'd be a horrible mother. A perfect daughter, a horrible little sister. But a terrible mother.

She shrugged a shoulder like she didn't really care, and scanned the mass of people with her eyes. "He won't find out from me."
The last thing on Earth Zuko ever wanted to think on was children. He didn’t like looking at them. He didn’t like speaking with them. He didn’t like hearing them in general. He didn’t want them. Purposefully, he chose not to think on matters like that.

“Well, you know I won’t,” he replied before turning his attention back to his drink. This was probably about as much as they would ever bond over anything, so he didn’t really want to ruin it by talking more about their father.

Azula trailed off, unsure of what to talk about. She pointed at a man, and asked, "Is he hot? How about him?"

Zuko gave a half squint at who she was pointing at. “What? The one with the --” he gestured to his own shirt, having no real descriptive words. “--thing on? No. Not at all. Er-- that other one... uh. No. He isn’t either.” Zuko: he was fucking picky, okay?

"What about him?" She pointed at a blond in black leather pants. She liked black leather, herself, but Zuko didn't need to know that. She leaned back against the bar and sipped at her drink as she played the 'is he hot?' game with her gay brother.

She wouldn't admit it, but it was kind of fun.

More fun than him silently seething at her, anyway. Which was something he did pretty often. He wouldn’t admit it, either, but he had certainly had worse times. “Well...” He might have liked the black leather himself. And also blonds. “Yeah, actually. I guess he is.”

"So if you were single, I could make him take you to the men's room and ...do whatever it was, right? You're a bottom, aren't you." She downed the rest of her drink and put the glass on the table. "Your turn. Ask me. Ask me!"

Zuko nearly choked on his drink at her questions. He had to fight back going completely red about it. “What? I’m not...” Okay, yeah, he really was though. He decided it was probably best to not answer that.

Instead, he inspected the crowd for women he might find attractive to ask her about. He spotted a blonde with short hair and tight jeans. “Her?”

"Mm..." Azula tilted her head, then shook it. "Her hair isn't long enough." Okay, so she could be pretty picky herself. Who she really wanted wasn't actually here, but she wasn't going to say that, not to Zuko. She wasn't even sure if he remembered Ty Lee (or anything at all). "The jeans are trashy."

They were getting on so well, that Zuko totally didn’t take that opening to make a jibe at her own tiny outfit. See? He could be nice when he wanted.
“Oh,” he said, and looked around again, until he spotted a brunette with longer hair (he didn’t see it, personally. If he was going to think a girl was cute, they probably had shorter hair) and what he could only guess was a less trashy outfit. “That one?”

"Yes," Azula answered, almost immediately. Her eyes roamed up and down and she nodded in approval. She looked at Zuko, surprise on her face. "You have good taste. Can you decorate my condo, Zuzu?"

She couldn’t quite resist.

“Shuttup,” he told her, more embarrassed than angry, and hiding it all by downing his drink and motioning for another. Truth be told, he wasn’t exactly a poster boy for gay men anywhere. Not that he was aware of, anyway. “So what makes those jeans less trashy than the other ones?”

"It's the tattoo," Azula explained, gesturing at the first blonde again. "I don't like it. I don't like those..." She frowned. It wasn't like smoking, which she absolutely detested, and she didn't hate tattoos. She had one on her left arm, a small flame.

It was the position of the tattoo. Azula wasn't a fan of tramp stamps.

Zuko eyed what she was talking about from across the room. “Oh,” he said, because he hadn’t noticed it before, but now that she had pointed it out, it was just a complete eyesore. He wrinkled his nose in slight distaste himself, before scanning the crowd again. “What about that one?” He pointed to a girl with curly hair and a short skirt.

She chewed her lip looking the girl up and down. Then she exhaled heated air from her nose. "That one. I like her legs, and her hair." There really wasn't much she didn't like about her, actually. "I wonder what's wrong with her."

Zuko gave his sister a confused look even as he sipped his new drink. He looked at the girl he’d pointed out again. “What do you mean ‘what’s wrong with her’?”

"That other girl had the tattoo," Azula pointed out. "This one looks too innocent but that's not actually a problem for me. Innocence can be fun to break. So I wonder what might be wrong with her."

Azula's standards were pretty high.

Fun to break? Zuko gave a little frown at that, although kept his eyes on the woman across the room. It wasn’t hard to see how his sister had ended up like she had, what with their lineage and all, but it was still a strange thing to hear coming from the mouth of a seventeen year old girl.
Subject changes were definitely called for. “So why are you really here?”

“To get you a girlfriend, of course." Azula turned and smirked at him. Her voice took on a familiar sort of playful quality. "And to spend some time with my big brother. Isn't that what every little sister dreams of? Quality time with her sibling?"

Ugh. “Right,” he said, because when she took on that tone, there was really nothing for it. “Well, as covered, one of those is definitely out.” He pressed his back against the counter of the bar, sort of leaning. “Are you going to go dance with that girl?”

"Should I?" She asked, something akin to trepidation in her voice. All her confidence started to drain from her at the thought. She tried to mask it. "I think I'll just watch, rather than demean myself."

“How is that demeaning? You’ll never get yourself a girlfriend by just watching,” he said, feeling a little smug. Nevermind the fact that he’d met Draco by literally walking into to him at the park. She didn’t need to know that anyway.

"Who says I don't just want a one-time thing," Azula retorted, still eyeing the brunette and trying to figure out the best way to approach her. She'd done that once before, but that had been with Rarity, and had only been intended for the experience.

“Not going to get that by just watching, either,” Zuko said, because he was apparently the voice of reason for the night, which probably wouldn’t bode well for anyone. He shrugged, not quite as good at nonchalance as Azula was. Little sisters weren’t supposed to date people anyway.

"Fine. What would you do? How would you approach that hot blond?" Azula asked, trying to turn things back around and onto him. She was buying herself time, mostly. She didn't know if she'd be able to get anywhere with that girl, especially if she approached her with her usual methods.

“I wouldn’t approach that hot blond,” Zuko hid his frowny face behind his drink glass. “because I have a boyfriend.” Oh man, it was really awesome to both be able to say that and to have a good excuse for pretending he wasn’t just as awkward as she was, in some regards. “But I think the usual method is...drink buying.” Right? Was that right? Sure.

"Assuming you didn't, you idiot." Azula shook her head, then slipped off her stool and walked towards the brunette. She stopped next to her and put on a nervous smile. "Excuse me. Love your outfit. It's really hot, like a fire ravaging the city while people scream and flee from it's scorching death hot."

Okay, that wasn't what she'd meant to say. "Uhm. Buy you a drink?"

Zuko had followed behind her -- not close enough to look creepy, but definitely close enough to hear. And what he heard made him turn straight back around to go back to the bar. Azula was going to need another drink after this, he was sure enough of that. He bit the palm of his hand to keep himself from laughing; really, he’d thought he was bad at this.

The brunette turned at the sound of Azula’s voice, and just rose her eyebrows up in something that was between surprised and disturbed. “What?”

"I'm going to buy you a drink," Azula said, pretending she hadn't just put her foot in her mouth a few seconds ago. She lifted her chin, a little haughtily. "Whatever you want, price isn't really an issue."

Her mind worked through what to follow up with. Obviously anything involving battleships was a bad idea, as was fire.

The girl just stared at her. And stared a little more. Because it was really just hard to forget when people talked about burning down cities, or whatever it was that had just happened. And then she smiled, but it was one of those awkward, apologetic sorts. “Uhhm. I’m here with my boyfriend, so...”

"Your boyfriend? Which is he?" Azula asked, fighting the urge to snort fire. She tried to sound seductive, but only came off as arrogant. "Because I assure you I'm better than him. Maybe he could go home with my brother? That would be a fair trade."

Zuko would have objected to that sort of trade, had he stuck around to listen in. But as it was, he was watching from across the bar, two drinks in hand. It didn’t appear to be going well for his sister, judging by her posturing.

“What?” The girl said again, because she couldn’t seem to say that enough. “No. What are you, crazy?” Giving up on conversations with weird strangers who wanted to make bizarre trades, the girl crossed her arms and turned away from Azula -- presumably to go back to her boyfriend.

Azula balled up a fist, glaring at the back of the girl's head like she was envisioning it on fire. Then, huffing, she turned and stomped back to the bar, muttering the whole way.

Zuko rose an eyebrow, and offered Azula the drink he’d gotten her while watching. “Well,” he said, vaguely consolingly, “you tried?”

"Not a word out of you," she said, looking morose. She took the drink and had a nice long sip of it, closing her eyes, as it burned on the way down. "How do you get a gaydar?"

“Gaydar?” What was-- oh. No need to ask. It was probably exactly what it sounded like. He shrugged, sipping his own drink as well. “Frankly, I just wait until people kiss me,” he said. It wasn’t really true, but it might as well have been.

"They should be lining up to kiss me," Azula said, voice quiet. She stared across the room at the brunette, then turned away from her. This was turning out to be a lot different than she'd expected. For one thing, she hadn't felt the urge to kill her brother in twenty minutes!

No worries, Azula. That urge always comes back, eventually. Zuko glanced at the brunette who was now chatting up a guy that was decidedly not good-looking. “Well, comparing people’s outfits to natural disasters does exactly cater to that line of thought,” he said a bit wryly.

"Her boyfriend is a disaster. And who said it was natural?" She knocked back the rest of her drink, letting the room spin a little bit. "I could kick his ass. Do you think I could kick his ass? I should kick his ass." She narrowed her eyes, then set the glass down. "But it's not worth it. She's unfortunately a bitch."

“What else would it be?” He asked, pushing down the memories of a dream he’d had only earlier in the week. Firebending. He didn’t want to think about that right now. Definitely not in relation to his sister. If she could actually set things on fire just by wanting to, the world would probably end.

Finishing his drink, he realized he’d lost count a while ago. Was that three? Did he want to go for four? Yes. Yes he did. “You could probably kick his ass,” he agreed, “but no need to if you don’t like her anyway.”

"It's better when they like you back," Azula said. Conflict and sadness crossed over her face like a shadow, before it was replaced by her usual calm expression. She didn't answer his question, letting the implications dangle in the air.

"I'm starving. Lets get some drinks to go and find something to eat."

Unfortunately, he was a little thick when he was buzzed, and just took her silence on the matter as answer enough. It wasn’t exactly rare, her tendency to ignore him if she thought he was being stupid.

“Yeah, okay,” he said, glancing around. “...This place has food?”

"If you could call this food." She made a face at one of the items on the menu. Really, she should warn him before he set fire to his bedroom one night like she had, but where was the fun in that?

Azula pointed at something else. "We'll try this. It will help us burn off the alcohol."

Okay, so maybe he wasn’t that thick. Not when she was being so obvious about it. He scooted into a stool, looking at the menu over her shoulder even as he signaled for service. “Have you become some kind of arsonist since I saw you last?” Please god. Let it be matches.

"I wouldn't go so far as to call it arson but I have developed a fascination with flame and heat. It's such a beautiful thing. A force of destruction and yet it gives warmth and cooks our food." She shrugged one shoulder. "I don't know where you'd get the idea I'd be into arson."

“And I really don’t get how you could possibly be into cooking,” Zuko pointed out, well, pointedly. “I’d believe you got into arson before I pictured you making cookies.”

Rolling her eyes, Azula replied. "I'm not into cooking, but you have to admit, the smell of a steak grilling is quite delicious." She turned her hand, palm up, and a little orb of blue fire appeared. It cast her face in an azure glow as she added. "I've taken to grilling them myself."

Zuko stilled, staring at the fire with a terrible sense of wonder. He’d only really had one dream to date -- and even though he’d had his own fire in it, it had not ended well. The fire hadn’t been blue, either.

Desperately, he wanted to touch it. To know it was real and to know the heat; unnatural as it was, it had such a familiarity to it. He didn’t though. He just kept staring. “How are you doing that?” He asked, even though he sort of knew. Sort of.

"I just am." She turned her hand, making the flame orbit close to her skin. Then she snuffed it out, and looked into Zuko's eyes. She saw the recognition there, and the confusion, and smiled. It was a smile that was at once serene, and yet malevolent.

"Have you had strange dreams, Zuzu?" Obviously he hadn't dreamt of their Agni Kai or he'd rub her nose in it. Probably. She was actually a little terrified of how he'd react.

Zuko looked at her -- seriously looked at her--for a moment before turning away -- back to his new drink, which he now felt the need to hold with both hands just to keep them both occupied. “Yes,” he said, “I have.” But not enough to really understand. That was what he didn’t say -- but he had a feeling that he didn’t really have to.

"Good, it was getting lonely." She looked down at her drink, and then ordered something to settle her stomach. Almost as an afterthought, and in a strange, tight voice, she added, "And I'm going to apologize, ahead of time."

While Zuko had taken more after their mother, Azula had always been more like their father. Basically, she very rarely apologized. He rose an eyebrow, but thought better of asking for clarification. “Okay,” he said slowly. “I’ll remember that.”

Azula barely acknowledged his acknowledgement, and instead dug into her spicey chili nachos as they'd arrived. They appeared to be the hottest thing on the menu. Of course.

She was probably a bit too blitzed to drive, but that wasn't going to stop her.

He didn’t eat, but instead drank more than he had in a long while. Either they made them well here, or he was just out of his comfort zone. Maybe both.

Anyway, Azula always drove like she was a bit drunk, so how bad could it really be? He leaned forward, resting his chin on the palms of his hands. “When we go, you should drop me at Draco’s,” he said, obviously a bit gone about it all.

"Okay. Do I get to see him at least? This boy that gives you hard-ons?" She didn't really care what she sounded like right now. She was blitzed, and going to go home alone. Again.

Zuko considered this; lost balance until his chin slid off his palm and then tried sitting up straight all over again. “Uhm,” he said, because what else do you say to that? “I--er. Do you actually want to?”

"Of course! I have to make sure he's....up to our standards. I mean yours are already pretty low but we do have appearances to keep up." She turned her head to look at him, her words starting to slur a little. "Can't have you dating a loser."

Probably, he should been annoyed at that, but he was drunk, and vaguely amused over her even wanting to meet him in the first place. “You mean rich,” Zuko said, rolling his eyes exaggeratedly. Money wasn’t something he really cared about -- but he could say things like that. He had money. Even on poor terms with his father, he never needed to worry about silly normal people things like bills or rent, or even getting a job. He was spoiled, in his own right. So was Azula, though. “His mother is a pop star.” He paused to drain the rest of his glass. “Draco’s nice. He really likes me.”

"Well, he passes muster." Azula pushed off of the stool and swayed. She balled her hands up into fists, and little flames sprouted around them. "If he hurts you I will show him whole new worlds of pain."

Because only Azula was allowed to hurt her brother.

Well, that was a nice way of looking at it. “He won’t,” Zuko said, standing and steadying himself by clinging to the bar as he did so. And it was true. Zuko was more scared of hurting Draco than being hurt by him. The blond was much, much nicer than he was. And far more attentive. “But it’s nice to know you care,” he said with a weird little laugh that just bubbled its way out of him. He wobbled a little when he walked, but made it without incident out of the club.

Azula snorted, and tried to brush off the idea. "Don't get the wrong idea, Zuzu. I don't care. I just..." Care. She tried to walk straight, as she headed out of the club, and to her car. She mostly succeeded. She tried to raise her core temperature, in the same way one did to breathe fire, in the hopes it might burn off some of the drink.

It only made her burp fire. She covered her mouth. "Excuse me."

Had he not just slipped into the car, Zuko would have fallen over in a fit of laughter. “Holy shit, you just -- fire--” and then it was back to laughing. Everything was terribly funny suddenly.

Honestly, he should have been worried about her even driving.

She giggled, slipping behind the wheel and starting the car. "Shut up that's not funny." Despite her words, she was grinning, and kept giggling every few seconds as she put the car into gear and started to swerve drive. "Where is Draco's house?"

“It’s so funny,” Zuko said; his jaw kind of hurt from laughing. It was bad news when Zuko wasn’t concerned enough to hang on to the oh shit handle. He just kind of sat still and moved exaggeratedly with the way the car was going. He told her the proper address she was going to, and was terribly glad he remembered.

"Hopefully I don't hit a baby carriage." She managed to almost hit a light pole once, two dogs, and a homeless man pushing a baby carriage. As she swerved past it, she started to laugh uncontrollably, and it was only a minor miracle that they made it to Draco's in one piece!

“Baby carriages are at least 100 hundred points though,” Zuko said, and looked at his hands as if maybe he would add up all the things she nearly hit on the way there and translate them into almost points. In the end, math ended up being just too hard and he gave up.

“We’re alive,” he said, as opened the car door, and stepped onto the drive. “You should drink some water.” It did not occur to him that he probably should have texted Draco first.

"Damn..." Azula crawled out of the car, and closed the door, leaning heavily on it. Her head was swimming, her vision foggy, and she just wanted to curl up and fall asleep, but she had more dignity than to crawl into her back seat.

Zuko wobbled over next to her, leaning against the car also, content for just a moment with watching the world spin around him in all directions. “I’m drunk,” he admitted.

“No you’re not. If you’re drunk, then I’m drunk,” she replied, shaking her head. “And I’m not drunk.”

“Of course not,” said Zuko, as if that logic made perfect sense. And he didn’t really ever get drunk so that had to be it. Yep. He gave a motion with his head, which made everything in his vision swim pleasantly. “Draco,” he said. Because he couldn’t fully express himself, even as he wandered up to the front step and knocked on his boyfriends’ door.

This promised to be awkward, and he should have known that. But; alcohol.

Draco happened to be sat in the living room with his guitar when the knock at the door came, which was strange since it was late, Pansy was out and Zuko had told him he had something to do that night.

Still he got up and went to answer the door, opening it he brightened as he saw his boyfriend, “Hey you” he smiled.

“You’re right. He’s hot,” Azula said, peering over Draco’s shoulder and half leaning on it. She gave Draco an appraising smile.

Oh, yep. There it was right there: the awkward. Zuko put on his most charming sort of smile (it wasn’t charming, it was awkward and a little terrible.) and wobbled a little bit. “Hi,” he said to Draco. He was actually really, really happy to see the other boy. “I’m --uhm.” he paused, to think. “Drun-- no. Uhm. This is my little sister. She wanted to meet you. I told her you were hot.” Oh my god, Zuko, shut it.

Draco hadn’t even noticed the girl until she appeared from behind Zuko, he was a little taken aback until Zuko drunkenly explained. “Okay” he said slowly, “Azula right?” he checked, remembering what little Zuko had told him, blushing slightly as he was informed his boyfriend had described him as ‘hot’. Before he remembered they were on the doorstep, “You guys should come in” he said, taking Zuko’s hand to draw him in close. He’d never seen him drunk before, it was definitely different.

Azula pushed past her brother, trying to get a better look at Draco. She looked him up and down, and then declared, "I approve. You may stick it in my brother."

Subtle little things slide past Zuko when he was drunk. Stuff like facial expressions, bad puns, the general emotion of people in the rooms. Things like his boyfriend getting permission to “stick it in” him was. Well. Not subtle. To his credit, he turned a very fetching shade of red. “Azula!”

Draco, to his credit, took Azula’s declaration pretty well. “Well it’s not really needed and a little late but thanks for the permission” he told her with the hint of a grin on his face as he pulled Zuko firmly into his arms. He really was adorable when he was embarrassed.

“Of course it’s needed,” Azula said, her tone taking on that imperiousness she liked to utilize. “Someone has to protect big brother from himself. And probably me.” She grinned, pretending she wasn’t wobbling on her feet. Because that was undignified. She pointed at Draco. “I just remembered. If you hurt him I will burn you from head to toe, and literally cook you from the inside out, slowly.”

Oh, this was just too much. Zuko hid his face in the curve of Draco’s neck and closed his eyes. Sometimes it was just a better option to feel the world spinning rather than watch it. His giggle fit from earlier was much preferred to this -- even though he still had an odd mind to break down in laughter. It didn’t make sense. “Azula!” he said again. And then tacked on just a little more for the sake of variety: “Draco...”

Draco couldn’t help smiling as she wobbled where she stood while attempting to threaten him, still he had to respect the sibling speech. He nodded easily, “That seems fair enough” he agreed, “I never plan on hurting him but message received and understood”

He pressed a kiss to the top of Zuko’s head when he pressed his face into Draco’s neck, “Don’t worry Zuk” he said comfortingly, “Everything is fine”

Only one that got to hurt her Zuzu was her, after all. "Someday..Zuzu and me will fight.." She clapped her hands together, watching them. They were adorable, even if she felt an unusual envy. She rarely envied Zuzu anything. Their mother's affection. Their father's ignorance. And now this affection.

“What? Why?” Asked Zuko blearily, even as he turned with a very undignified wobble to look at Azula, probably the only reason he was still standing was because Draco was there to help him keep his balance. He couldn’t understand why she would say something like that when they seemed to be getting on just fine at the moment. If he thought on it (which he wasn’t), he might have connected the dots with her earlier unexplained apology.

He gave a silly, weird little giggle even though he didn’t really have any reason to.

There would be no fighting Zuko if Draco had anything to do with it, but he let it go for now. After all both Azula and Zuko were so incredibly drunk that he wasn’t sure they knew what they were saying anyway.

He held onto Zuko as he swayed unsteadily and giggled, “I think it might be a good idea to get you some water and a lay down” he told his boyfriend. Looking up at Azula, he added “I can set up the sofabed” he offered, not liking the idea of her driving. He could see her car and already thought it was a miracle they had made it here in one piece considering how drunk she appeared to be.

“A Princess of the Fire Nation does not...doesn’t..not..sleep on a Sofa bed,” she replied. She closed one eye, trying to focus, and let out a long, resigned sigh. “But she doesn’t want to get..intimate..with a telephone pole.”

Azula started to giggle uncontrollably.

Azula giggling set Zuko off, too. The laughter just bubbled out of him and he couldn’t even help himself. Everything was funny. And while Azula probably meant she didn’t want to get into an accident, he definitely pictured her trying to kiss one instead. Hilarious. Covering his mouth with his hands, he tried to get himself under control. “Take the couch,” he said after a deep breath.

Draco was a saint for putting up with them.

Honestly Draco just found them both kind of hilarious. And luckily he had a lot of experience with looking after drunk people - thanks to Pansy. So he led them both into the living room gesturing to Azula to take a seat in one of the chairs before helping Zuko to sit in another one so he could fetch water from the kitchen and blankets for the sofa from the closet.

Azula plopped into the chair, leaning back and closing her eyes. She murmured something that sounded like a name, and let herself pass out. At least, that's what she'd say. The girl had no control over whether or not she passed out, by now.

Zuko giggled about that too, albeit a little more quietly. No need to wake up his passed out sister. She’d probably be annoyed enough when she woke up and found she’d had a nap on someone elses’ furniture.

When Draco came back with the water, he took it, and sipped it. “I think she’s sleeping,” he said, a little obviously.

“Oh, yeah. Should we wake her and move her?” he said, though he belatedly realised Zuko probably wasn’t the best person to ask considering his drunken state.

“No,” said Zuko, sounding pretty serious, despite all odds. He might have been drunk, but he wasn’t wrong. Bother her now, and she’d probably burn their hair off. Zuko liked hair. So. “She’ll wake up and move if she wants.”

Draco nodded and laid one of the blankets he’d brought in with him on the sofa bed and the other gently over the sleeping girl.

Moving to his boyfriend he took the water from him before holding out his hands, “Come on you” he said with a smile reserved just for Zuko, “Bedtime.”

“Right,” Zuko agreed, wobbling up and allowing (there it was again: the siblings were probably more similar than they might have thought) himself to be lead to the bedroom.

Draco sat Zuko down on the bed while he closed the bedroom door firmly, fetched a glass of water from the en-suite to place on the bedside table and retrieved Zuko’s pyjama bottoms from the drawer that Draco now referred to as Zuko’s.

“How you feeling?” he asked as he sat next to Zuko and brushed his hair back from his face.

“Tired,” There was that giggle again. Zuko pointedly ignored the pj’s, grabbed Draco’s wrist and pulled him into bed. It would have been cute, probably, except he started snoring not even ten seconds later.