Literally Pirateninja (shadowcat) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2012-05-05 03:41:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, kitty pryde (shadowcat) |
It was a wonderful feeling.
Who: Kitty
What: Dreams of orbital skydiving falling to earth, and of breaking a friend's heart.
When: After blanket fort time!
Where: Kitty's place
Status: Complete
Rating: PG
She was possessed, being run ragged trained, the firebird and the genocide and then she was falling through her bed.
She was falling. The earth was stretching out before her and it was terrifying and exhilirating at the same time. She could see it, all of it. It wasn't the first time she'd seen Earth from space. A realization that would in the waking world confound her.
But this was a different view all together. Unobstructed except for the visor in her suit. It was beautiful. A thin layer of fabric between her and space. She wasn't even sure she'd survive reentry, but she knew she had to try, or she'd die back on that station.
As she felt the suit begin to heat up from the friction of the atmosphere, her body reacted. The friction disappeared and it was like she was floating instead of falling. It was a wonderful feeling. The fear faded, if she could hold her breath long enough she'd make it. It was almost better than sex.
The dream faded as she made landfall, shifting again. She wished she could keep falling.
"Shan I.." She didn't know what to say. Or how to react, really. The thought terrified her. Of all the things she was, the places she'd been, the things she'd done, the people she'd been forced to kill... This was something that she had fought with herself over in the past. Over Rachel, over Ilyana. And now her friend was laying her feelings on the line.
Kitty couldn't deal with it.
Xi'an had feelings for her, and Kitty's fear, her hesitation had to be evident on her face, to cause the pain in the other woman's.
"I'm sorry I..don't think..I'm not...You're a friend." Oh please, don't cry.
Kitty jerked awake. There was a warm body pressed against hers on the couch. The twins were sound asleep in the blanket fort on the floor. The tv had gone into sleep mode. Xi'an's head rested on her chest, and Kitty lifted her hand to stroke the woman's hair.
She'd fallen asleep with Xi'an next to her. She felt like she was falling around the woman. She feared hurting her. Thats the explaination for it. Why her mind went to those places.
But Kitty had her doubts, and her worries.
Why did the exhilerating feeling of free fall, and the emotional anguish feel so vivid and real? Or how the horror on Genosha left her feeling raw and the terror and awe of Phoenix left her in wonder? How did she understand how to push her body past limits she hadn't known existed, because of weeks of training and a demonic possession she'd only dreamed of?
Why did the dreams feel so real?
Her mind worked through all this as she shifted herself and the other woman on the couch to lay in a more comfortable position. She was careful to not wake Xi'an, sliding her arm around the woman's waist and resting her face against the back of her neck. As she fell asleep, she hoped that if she dreamed about Xi'an again, it wouldn't be about breaking her heart.
Getting the shit kicked out of her by that hairy man's training would be preferable.