Who: Faiza and Thor Where: His hospital room What: Faiza visits and there is chiding, doctorly talk, some flirting and news and angst When: Monday, Dec 10 Warnings/Rating: PG Status Complete!
Thor was nervous, it had to be said, about seeing Faiza. While he casually flirted with many women, and indeed, did much more than flirting, with Faiza, he... well, he was a little more emotionally involved. He respected and liked her a great deal. She was one of two women he had dreamed of during his coma, and the dreams of her had been... well, things he would likely not tell her for a long time, if then.
She was an intriguing woman, and not because she did not sleep with him, but because... she was interesting. And he had desire to know her, to make her smile. The night he had made her smile over and over still rested as one of his favorites. He hoped to duplicate it some time soon.
Faiza had checked up on him from time to time. It wasn't that she didn't trust the other doctors, she just liked to see things with her own eyes. It had been tense, but reassuring each time.
It was with a wide, happy smile that she greeted him, even going as far as to give the man a hug. "You're looking a lot better than the last time I saw you!"
Thor smiled at her, eyes warm, and carefully hugged her back. “Hello, beautiful doctor. And thank you. I feel much better. No longer lost.” He shuddered as he remembered the blackness and the dreams.
“How are you? I’m sorry I never got back to you. I was looking forward to taking you out again.” he nodded.
"I checked up on you a few times. I'm afraid there was no lovely candlelit dinner but I did eat a rather nice sandwich one day." She settled in and put her hand on his arm. "So you feel found, then?"
The contact made him flush and smiled warmly. His eyes slid along her and to her eyes, and he felt himself relax. “I do... I dreamed a lot, but most of the time I was out, I was... I was in darkness, with no sound, no light. Sometimes, people would come and talk to me, and I remember all of it, but a lot of the time, it was just... quiet and dark. And then I woke up, and you’re here and...” tears came, despite his determination not to cry. “...and I am not alone, and I feel... I am very glad to not be alone anymore, Faiza.” His voice was low and throaty and hoarse with the tears that came down his face, unstopping.
Faiza felt herself clench up, her chest tightening as she took one of Thor's hands in both of her own. "You were never alone, my friend. You had people with you all the time. A great many people care about you, and we'll all still be here, even now that you've woken up."
She smiled softly. "Perhaps especially so now that you've woken up, duck. It'll be okay."
Thor shuddered and clenched her hand gently, but tightly. “I know, it was just... dark. “ He shook his head. “I’ve never felt so alone as in those hours.” But then he smiled and looked at her through the tears, slowly stopping crying.
“And I remember you coming in. Thank you.”
Then he grinned. “Then i can still manage to have a prize curry delivered some evening, to spend time with my favorite doctor.”
"I'm hardly your favorite doctor, and certainly not the one that saved your life," she replied, bashful. Even with him complimenting her, and the whole strange ...thing... with Obi, she still blushed, and she was still bashful.
Faiza shook her head, and added, "Well, perhaps I'm your favorite doctor, but I think you might be unreasonably biased. How are you? Really, how do you really feel. You can be candid with me."
Thor blinked, then poked her softly. “Hey, yes you are. And while you are not that person, you are my favorite doctor and one of my favorite people.” His eyes were warm, and serious, and full of that meaning. “I am rather fond of you, my dear friend.” He nodded.
“Unreasonably biased? Maybe.”
he sighed at her question, then nodded. “How am I? I feel like I could break if I breathe too heavy, and moving is... bad. I can move one arm, fairly easily, but that jars everything else. Nothing foodwise stays down without the medicine and sleep is... “
he looked down. “If I am not dreaming of another world, then i am having nightmares of being stuck in the dark.” The last was whispered.
"You were stuck in the dark," Faiza replied, gently. "So that's understandable. While I can only heal the body, I do know of some who could help your mind." Her voice, while gentle, was still somewhat stern. "There's no shame in admitting you might need that sort of help."
Thor nodded, looking at her. “I know. I... am willing to see them.” He reached for one of her hands, and squeezed it. “As long as I can see you as well.” He smirked a little, eyes dancing. “I have not forgotten that I owe you a night out, dear lady.”
She looked a little surprised, having thought that it would require more effort on her part to convince him. "Well then, i'm glad to hear that. And of course we can have that night out, I just...ah..." She fidgeted with her headscarf with one hand, rubbing his knuckles with the other.
"There was this..." She shifted her eyes, trying to fight a wave of guilt.
Thor nodded, smiling, and then watched her and his smile drained away. She had found someone... else. He shut that down though and smiled again. No matter how disappointed, or even hurt, he felt, he did want her to be happy and the fact that maybe she had found someone, that was good, right?
Right. He smiled softly at her. “You met someone, didn’t you?”
Faiza's heart pounded, and she chewed her lip. "I don't know if I've found someone, but he's sort of...swept me off my feet. It wasn't like he tried or anything, he's about as bad as I am at this thing. And I really wasn't looking for it and I still care about you and I'm terribly sorry and I never wanted to hurt you but I don't know if I could have felt that way about you and you certainly deserve better than another rollabout."
She remembered how to breathe.
“Faiza. Stop. It’s okay. Things happen. I’m glad you... are having fun.” He nodded to her, smiling softly. h reached out to gently squeeze her hand, this time to comfort her. “YOu deserve good as well. And I hope you find it.” He was disappointed, and a little hurt, but that would not show while she was in there with him. Maybe it was stupid, but he had that much pride.
"You're really a wonderful man," Faiza whispered, squeezing his hand back as she struggled to breath again and calm herself. "I can't even really explain it. My dreams might have some answers, but I'm not sure I'm ready to think about that yet."
She exhaled shakily, then smiled. "I wish my powers were full strength, so I could knit you back together. They're stronger now, but not reliable enough, I think."
Thor blushed. “I’m just me, Faiza. And I’ll be fine. A few weeks in here won’t kill me.” He paused. “Be careful of dreams, but trust them, cautiously. they can lead to good things, and to disappointments.” Very much so.
Thor smiled.
“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine, really.”
"Still, if I could heal you up, I would. But I have hope that maybe someday I'll be able to do this to you." She pulled an apple from her pocket, and put it on the bed. Flexing her fingers, she pointed them at it, and the fruit suddenly...separated. The skin came off, and then the flesh of the fruit came apart, and the core in the center. She held it that way for a few seconds, then put it back together.
"Have you heard of Excalibur? The sword, I mean. The whole King Arthur thing?" She asked that, as if she hadn't just took apart an apple.
Thor smiled, then watched her and was amazed. “That’s... incredible!” He smiled wide-eyed.
He held out his hand. “I can do a little. Nothing that awesome.” When he had the apple, he concentrated on letting a little of his anger and sorrow out, and then there was a crackling of small lightnings around the apple and the smell of cooking apple wafted up as he let it fade.
“Cooked apple?”
He nodded. “Excalibur? Sure. I did Camelot on stage.”
"Yes, please," She said, her eyes glinting. It wasn't often that one befriended a god of Thunder. The crackling had confirmed for her what she'd suspected since she'd dreamed more. "Well, I dreamed I was entrusted with the sword. Me, the wielder of Excalibur! Can you believe it? I'm non-violent!"
Thor handed it to her and nodded.”I believe it. You are worthy.” He smiled softly. “More so than I am.” He nudged her. “You are a good woman and a hero already.”
Faiza took a bite, savoring the taste with a sweet sound. She wiped her mouth politely with her hand. "I suppose. I think that was the point. Even if I didn't believe it at the time. I became a squire, of sorts, to the Black Knight of all people. Dane...was..is a good man." She sighed fondly. "He had a dark heart but he only wanted to do good."
Thor nodded. “Good. Such a being is often one you can learn from.” he smiled.
She was a good woman, and a warm one, full of possibility. She would save lives and keep making a mark long after he as gone.
"I get the impression I chafed a little at times, but they were important lessons." Faiza would really rather just be a doctor. She would like to pull someone apart, fix their hurts, and put them back together. Patient after patient after patient. Even if she wore herself out in the process.
“I think you are a good person. And I think no matter how you are called,. you will answer. even if reluctantly.” He nodded. he believed in her,and smiled a little. If he could, he would help her.
"So are you. Even if you think you're just a simple actor, you're so much more than that. Not the lightning thing, or anything like that. Just in who you are, here." She rested her hand over his heart.
He smiled softly. “Thank you, Faiza.” he made a determined and successful effort to not let out that small part of him that responded with one line. But not enough for you. And he buried it and smiled to her, raising a hand to take hers and kiss it.
She stroked his lips, knowing that those words floated between them. She was so terrible sorry and so terribly guilty. She leaned in and hugged him again.
Her touch on his lips and her hug almost did him in, but he hugged her close and just smiled. “You are a good woman.” He smiled a little.
“I am having a small get together in a private room, here, on Christmas. Short and not disruptive, and I was hoping...well, that you could make it, sometime that day,. if you wont be with family or... others.”
"I don't celebrate Christmas," Faiza responded gently. "But I will certainly be sure to stop by. There's nothing wrong with a little cheer, no matter what day it is." She pulled her head away and smiled at him.
He paused, then nodded. “I suppose I should return the Christmas gift I bought you, then.” Thor smiled softly. Maybe it would be okay, for her. he wasn’t sure how she would feel about it.
"Oh you didn't have to! But I won't tell if you won't. We can just call it a New Years gift." In truth, she was delighted and touched by the gesture, and pecked him on the cheek. "It's the thought that matters, really."
“I know, but... the one thing I can do, really, is do things for people. I am not... skilled in much else. But I can give.” Thor nodded. “Thank you.”
"Thor, you're skilled in so much more. I assure you." She sat back. "It's just a matter of time until we find out what that is."
Thor shook his head. “Thank you, Faiza. I’m fine, really.” He gently patted one of her hands. He felt... shook up. “Will you see your family this month, or do they live in the area, or back where you used to live? I realized... I did not know.”
"I've some distant cousins in Pakistan, but my only other family were my mother and father back in London, and they're gone now." Faiza smiled, and while it was a little sad, it was also accepting. "
He gently squeezed both her hands and nodded. “You are a good woman. I know they would be proud of you.” He nodded.
"Thank you." She squeezed his hands back, then exhaled slowly. "Thor, can I ask you a question? It's a little personal and .... oh no, nevermind. I couldn't."
"What do you want to know,Faiza?"
“I just want to..oh nono.” Faiza lifted her gaze back to his face. "Why do you seek so much from women, Thor? It's like you're looking for something and you can't find it."
Thor blinked at her. “Why do I... what?” He was confused, completely and utterly. “I can honestly say I have no idea what you are talking about.” He shook his head. “I generally don’t ask much at all from women, and choose.... well, I choose to be around those who are honorable, honest, strong, and beautiful. How is that asking ‘so much’?”
“I’m saying this all wrong,” Faiza said, sighing. She looked down at her hands, feeling like her curiosity had gotten her foot into her mouth. “I mean, more in reference to your sprain. You’re rather active and all.”
Thor listened and hmmed. “Oh... you mean why do I have so much sex? Why do I sleep with as many women as I do?” He was a little amused. “Truth to tell... I do it because I enjoy making women feel good, I’m very good at it, and I like how it makes me feel, too. “
He paused.
“And I don’t... just have sex with women. I find a woman who I admire. One who is strong and smart and beautiful in some way, and I court her. Not romantically, truly, but... with the idea that I want to make them feel good, and i want to share it with them. And I don’t just never see those women again. If I sleep with a woman, generally we are friends for some time after. If not for life. It’s an intimacy, a sharing, and an exchange of energy, life, and intent. I don’t have casual sex. “
He looked down then at her. “There are very few women who I have pursued with any more intent than that, but only once in my life did they respond when i did, and that was ended savagely, destructively, and completely, a long time ago. Honestly, when a woman gets romantic signals from me, almost every time she doesn’t take me seriously. So I rarely try to give those.’ He had recently, once, tried. But then she had gone and found another bloke. Another nail in romance for Thor’s beliefs.
“Does that answer your question?” He had spoken with quiet certainty and passion, true belief and true energy.
"Yes," Faiza said quietly. She wasn't sure how she felt about that. Not about what he did. But about why he did it. To her, it sounded incredibly lonely, in a twisted sort of way. "It sounds like you give and give and don't get what you really need. I don't think I could have ever given you that, but I believe whole-heartedly that there is a bird out there, who could match you in every way."
She tilted her head, then added. "Or a bloke, of course."
Thor didn’t say anything for a long moment. When he spoke, he spoke softly. “I honestly have nothing to say to that.” His smile was lopsided, but there. Inside, he was feeling rather like a kicked puppy. Because of course, he had not been looking for that from her. Not by the second, not-date. By then, he had been hoping to get her used to him being around, and maybe, just maybe, have a real date, a romantic one. But there had been the explosion, and the coma, and the other bloke, and all that was gone now. And so Thor Odinson smiled, and even his eyes did. He was a pretty good actor, really. No one ever knew what he was feeling, not unless he wanted them to.
“You might be right, Faiza. We’ll never know.”
She nodded her head, like that was that. She thought that there might be more to it all and she would be devastated if she knew just how badly she'd hurt him. But for now she smiled, like all would be right in the world.