Cameron can appreciate art (tin_miss) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2012-12-08 14:44:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, cameron phillips, link |
Yes. She needs a name. What's a good name for a cow?
Who: Link and Cameron
What: Concerto for Cello and Cow.
When: Last week sometime
Where: Link’s farm
Status: complete
Rating: PG for forshadowing
Link wasn’t sure if Cameron had ever been on a working farm before, so he was a genuinely excited about the prospect of introducing her to this little corner of the earth that he owned. Frankly, he was just as excited to have another human around. Sometimes he found himself chatting with the cows, which isn’t so normal. It’s when you’re half-disappointed they don’t respond that it’s time to worry.
She hadn't. Not even in her dreams though she did have a basic understanding of how to grow food. Future!John had made sure of that. She borrowed the SUV and drove out to the farm. Once she arrived, she got out. She hadn't been sure what to wear, so had picked out boots, jeans, and a tank top. She wore an open sweater over it for warmth, along with a scarf.
Yes, even in California, it got cool this time of year. Link himself was wearing fashionable clothes, which meant his sleeves were buttoned at the wrist, rather than rolled. He spotted Cameron’s car through the kitchen window and walked to the porch to greet her. “Did you follow the artichoke signs?” he asked, half-smiling. He’d set up a few hand-made banners along the road.
"Yes. They were tight." She smiled at him nervously, as she opened the rear door of the SUV and pulled out her cello. She had an odd moment of Deja Vu. Instead of a cello, though, she had been pulling out weapons. Guns.
They'd had so many guns, and they'd had to use them so much. She rubbed at her palm, then calmed herself by feeling her pulse.
When she turned around again, a mask had settled into place. A smile for show. She hefted the cello. "Where's the cow?"
Link took the front steps in one bound and stretched out his hand. He’d carry the cello for her, if she’d let him. Honestly, he wasn’t sure if Cameron would. “I’ve got that,” he said as he offered. “The cow is in the dairy barn. It’s a walk.”
She wouldn't. It was her baby. She took his hand and shook it instead. "I can carry it. Lead the way, I don't mind the walk. I could use the exercise anyway."
He watched her pass, hand still outstretched after her shaking it. Maybe he ought to have expected it. Cameron was pretty, but there was no pretending she wasn’t on the strange side. “As long as you don’t mind. It walk this path six times a day.” There was in fact a well-worn track in the grass.
"I really don't." She turned her head to smile shyly at him, shifting the cello to her other hand. She kept an eye out for any cow pies. "Is she still sad? I hope this doesn't make her sadder. I've been playing depressingly lately."
Link sighed. He didn’t know if cows could really get sad, but this one wasn’t still wasn’t acting right. “Well, then maybe she’ll be happy that you understand her. Is everything okay?”
"Everything is fine," She lied, a smile still on her face. "How have you been? Other than the cow, that is. Is everything all right for you?"
He nodded. Things were basically the same for him day in and day out. He lived a peaceful, if somewhat solitary life, especially for someone his age. “Did you do anything for Thanksgiving?” He hadn’t.
"Not really. We didn't have burned turkey like last year, but I think I'd rather have burned turkey than Sarah in a coma." She walked into the barn, or whatever sort of cow-protecting building there might be. She tried to think of happier things. The poor cow deserved happy.
Link’s step faltered. “Oh... Who’s Sarah?” He couldn’t recall hearing the name before. Of Cameron’s family, he knew about a brother figure she alluded to having some kind of feelings for, and that was it. He tried to keep that information on the sidelines of his brain.
"My adoptive mother," she replied, hugging her cello. Her feelings for Sarah were conflicted, in light of the dreams. She thought the woman would hate her if she started to dream. "She was in a car accident last month, and she hasn't woken up."
“Oh.” Link grimaced. “Oh. I’m sorry.” He felt bad for asking, even though he’d had no idea the answer would hit so close to home. His mouth dried. “...Do you want to talk about it? Or...?”
"Were you driving the car that hit her? Don't be sorry." She looked around for the cow, taking the cello out of it's case. "I play for her, sometimes. I think it helps me more than her. I worry for John though.”
Well, of course, he hadn’t been the one driving the car. Sometimes Cameron sounded like she had some kind of chip missing. She had some shell, but beneath it she seemed so sensitive. “That’s nice of you.”
They’d come to the door of the dairy barn. Most of the cows were in the pasture, munching of grass. The cow they needed to spend some time with was inside the barn, keeping to herself, and her mooing sounded forlorn.
It really did sound sad. Cameron peered in, then walked over to the cow and pet her on the head. "What's her name?" She found a stool and sat down, arranging the cello and then testing the strings.
“Name?” Link asked, sincerely confused. He had a lot of cows. None of them had names.
"The cow." She looked from the cello to the cow. "Maybe that's why she's so sad. She doesn't have a name...."
She moved the cello and set it aside, and walked over to the cow. She placed her hand on the cow's head. "Is that why? You don't have a name? Everything should have a name."
Link tried to suppress a laugh. Really, he thought everything they were doing was a bit silly. The only reason he was doing it was to spend some time with Cameron. “You think naming her would help?”
"Yes. She needs a name. What's a good name for a cow?" Cameron continued to stroke the cow's forehead, staring into her eyes. "Allison. You're an Allison." She couldn't say why, but the name was really appealing to her.
He hadn’t expected her to come up with a traditional human name. He’d been waiting for a suggestion like Bessie or Milky White. “Allison. Sure.” Link walked to Allison’s side and patted the bony hump were her spine curved. “Allison, would you like the pretty girl to play the cello for you today?”
Cameron smiled. It was a bright, girlish smile, accompanied by a bright, girlish laugh. "I would like to play cello for you, Allison."
The cow mooed. Link smiled at Cameron. “I think that’s cow for By all means.” His eyes made a quick scan of the barn. He was looking for his milking stool. It would be a little low to the ground, but it was all he could offer for her to sit on.
Smiling, Cameron picked up the cello again. Once there was a milking stool to sit on, she sat down. She started to play. It wasn't a specific tune, but like she was searching for one. What she found was a sort of forlorn melody. Sadness and loss, a little bit of fear, but behind it all an undercurrent of hope, and love. In the back of her mind she saw the face of a girl who looked just like her, but wasn't. Scared, and defiant. The image passed, but the melody continued.
Link leaned with his shoulder against one of the stall’s wooden beams, folding his arms and looking casual. Except for his eyes. The light behind them dimmed and then flickered to life, the pupils dilating as the mysterious melody progressed. The tune was not what he had expected at all, but that was an outcropping of whom Cameron was. As his listened, the atmosphere in the barn changed. It grew colder, and the lighting less saturated. Whether or not the sun had merely fallen behind a cloud mattered very little.
Vague images of instruments playing ancient melodies passed through his thoughts like something he had once seen in person, but forgotten until now.
Link rubbed his brow. “You’re... really good,” he said dumbly. But she had taken away what little control he already had over words.
She rested the bow on her knee, eyes glistening, and smiled. "Thank you." She had wanted to play for him as much as for Allison the Cow. "I hope I'm good enough to get an album to sell."
She pet the cow again. The barn seemed distant.
Link pushed off from the post of the stall, giving his forehead one more massage before dropping his hand. He approached the cow, who turned her enormous head in his direction. She looked at puzzled and as moved as he felt, if that was possible for a cow. Brain the size of a walnut, after all.
“You’re making an album?” he asked, realizing his mouth was dry now. He swallowed.
"I want to. It'll help with the finances. And music and art are my outlets. For the things I can't say, or that they can't hear when I do say them." She was starting to be interested in ballet, too. She had been. In the dreams. A machine who appreciated ballet.
A much better pasttime than killing.
Link smiled softly. He had a very meek smile at times. It was the most boyish thing about him. He had been forced to become a man long before he was ready.
He felt like he suddenly got Cameron.
But when he was deep in thought, his quietness got the better of him. He stared and said nothing until a minute too long had passed.
Cameron smiled back at him, shyly. "Don't think so deeply, you'll forget to come back."
Link’s face flushed. “Yeah, I do that sometimes. I forget to talk.” He shrugged at himself. “I spend a lot of time on my own, so... Can you blame me?”
"You're not alone. You have the animals here." She patted Allison on the nose again. "But I get it. I'm alone a lot too. I take a lot of late night walks."
His face brightened a bit. He, mostly unconsciously, took another step closer to Cameron. “Me too. Around the farm. Sometimes I go into the woods.”
Meanwhile, Allison nuzzled the palm of the nice girl who had played an old cow a pretty song.
"Isn't is scary in the woods? It's scary on the streets at night. Muggers and rapists and kidnappers. I'm always armed." She said it matter-of-factly, as though carrying a gun was simply normal. Her face lit up a bit when Allison nuzzled her palm, though.
It was the first time in days that Allison had really acknowledged someone’s presence.
Link wasn’t put off at all by the idea of Cameron walking around with a weapon. “That’s probably a good idea,” he said. Even he had a few guns in the house. They’d belonged to his father, but still, they were his, even if he didn’t go walking around with them. “I’ve never had any trouble around here. I’ve got guns just in case. I’ve never had to use one.”
"Have a problem with cougars, or bears?" She turned, walking away from the cow and stepping closer to Link. She pulled her gun, a 9mm semi-automatic that she'd modified to be fully automatic, to show him. "It wouldn't stop a bear."
“But just about anything else...” he breathed low, looking down at the gun. Truthfully, he’d seen his fair share of bears. But he had trouble convincing himself to stay out of the woods, for some reason. He felt far too comfortable in there, like it was an extension of his homestead.
She stuck it back in her jeans and tugged her shirt over it. It was a comfortable movement, odd for a girl just barely nineteen. "I haven't had much cause to actually shoot it. At a person I mean." Never trust, and you're never safe. Sarah Connor was the same in both universes, where that was concerned. Cameron had learned those lessons. But still, she wanted to. Wanted to trust.
Link bounced nervously on his heels. The brief glimpse at Cameron’s midriff was enough to make him quiet again. He lifted his eyes to her face and met her gaze. “Maybe you could walk with me...” he finally said. “And protect me in the forest.”
He bit down on his tongue, wondering if that had been a step too far. But Cameron had to know what he was thinking by now.
She blinked, blushing. She wasn't so blunt or so far gone into the machine that she asked him if he wanted to have sex with her, but her mind had gone there. Cameron tilted her head. "Okay." She put away her Cello. "Is there a safe place to store this?"
Link’s pulse was loud inside his ears. He’d also run out of words again. With a nod, he looked around, spotting a shelf that was not in use. It was meant for old equipment that didn’t exist anymore. It was wide enough to store a cello. He pointed it out.
She nodded, lifting the cello with some struggle onto the shelf. Then she wiped her hands on her jeans and walked over. She held out her hand. "Okay, I'm ready."
He wasn’t entirely sure what she was ready for. In fact, he wasn’t convinced he’d suggesting anything specific. He only knew that he’d do whatever Cameron would lead him to as he took her hand.
Cameron led him outside, and headed towards the woods, wondering if they'd meet a bear or not. "What did you think of the music?"
Honestly, Cameron was making him more anxious than a bear ever had. He kept his nose down, watching his feet. “It was beautiful,” he said earnestly. “Is it from something?”
"Nothing in particular. It's just one of the melodies in my head," Cameron replied, still holding Link's hand as they walked. She looked around at the trees. "I guess you could call it an original tune."
His eyes became wide, though his face stayed looking downward. “You mean you just made it up?”
"Yes?" She looked at him, blinking. "All music gets made up somewhere, Link. I suppose you could say some melodies are universal and can appear in other songs, but I made it up when I played. It came from..inside me." She squeezed his hand.
Maybe he didn’t know a thing about music. He knew what he liked. What Cameron had played sounded so purposeful that it was hard to believe she’d made it up on the spur of the moment. And yet, Link did believe her. “Gosh...” he sighed, finally looked back at her and at the trees around them.
She let go of his hand, and hopped up onto the trunk of fallen tree, walking up it, and sitting down. Theres was room for him too, and she patted the part next to her, as if to suggest he should come up here too. "I can draw too. Not very well."
Link didn’t need to hop to get on top of it. He sat down in the space beside her. “So you you’re pretty artistic.” He had no skills like that whatsoever. He could hardly draw stick figures.
"Yes. Sketches mostly. I've drawn Polly, our parrot. And John and Sarah. A couple of the kids when I was in High School. I'm better with landscapes. It's like I have trouble capturing their souls." She shrugged a shoulder, like it wasn't important. "I could be better, but I'd rather focus on my music."
“Well, if you want to come by and draw the farm, that would be just fine,” he smiled. “A lot of artists come by. Cows at pasture are popular subjects. Apparently.” The smile became a light chuckle.
"Does anyone draw Allison?" She looked in the direction of the barn. She still thought Allison was lonely. Not the sort of lonely that could be solved by other cows. Maybe Allison wanted a baby cow?
“I’m sure she has as much as any of the other cows.” Link shrugged. His gaze moved from the trees and back to Cameron. “Maybe you could be the first to draw her specifically.”
For such a strange girl, she had a big heart. For animals, anyway. Link wonder if he ranked anywhere at all. His hand moved back to hers. He preferred to hold it.
"I think I'll try. It might be fun!" She did like drawing animals. She looked down at his hand, then squeezed it. She liked the contact, liked that she could look at someone without feeling weird about who they were. She felt distant from her dreams, here.
"I.." She trailed off, face turning red.
He wanted to take it back, what he’d thought before, about Cameron missing a chip, or being less than human. Still waters ran deep. It was possible he was just hoping for too much, that someone he liked might also like him. That someone might be like him. Maybe he was just lonely.
“Can I... kiss you?” he asked. He wanted to be sure he was at least reading something correctly.
Cameron placed a hand on Link's cheek, then leaned in and kissed him. She hadn't been with someone since that night club and Kirk, and she was lonely. Link was sweet, and friendly, and seemed lonely too. And there was a strength about him she found attractive.
Link couldn’t recall the last time he’d been kissed. Since the accident that had taken his parents, dates had been few and far between. He rarely got up the nerve. But Cameron had stuck out in his head since they’d first met. Possibly because she was so odd. Maybe that made her exotic in a certain way.
She'd thought of Link a couple of times. People rarely stuck out in her mind and he was one of those that had. The kiss was pleasant, and stoked a fire in her belly. It made her feel human, alive, like the music had. She wasn't a machine and she never would be. She took comfort in that.
Cameron brought her hand down to Link's neck, then slid it around to the back and scratched lightly with her nails.
His skin responded by tightening and Link drew a sharp breath through his nose. He curved and arm around her waist and pulled Cameron a little closer. He didn’t expect the kiss to last much longer. It was only their first, and he, well, he was a nice guy. But he wanted to get as much from it as he could.
The kiss ended, and Cameron pulled back her head, looking into his eyes. She whispered, as if it were a secret. "...that was tight."