Varric Tethras | Dragon Age (taleweaver) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2012-11-22 13:26:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | !complete, helen magnus, varric tethras |
I’d rather show you.
Who: Varric and Helen
What: After the confession
When: Right after This log
Where: Helen's house
Rating PG
Status: Complete
It had been a long walk. Varric talked to the dogs the whole way, for lack of anyone else to talk to. He'd regrettably left Bianca in the house. She'd have some good advice. He sighed, kneeling to pet the dogs. "Come on, lets get you home. She probably needs to hug you both."
He turned around, and headed back. It wasn't the end, no, but he was hurt, and it wasn't even that irrational of one. She'd kissed another man. She had feelings for him. The 'in another time' sort of feelings. That was strong, and romantic and made him feel incredibly conflicted. Because in the sort of story he'd write about that, the man in his position would come out the loser.
At first, she hadn’t wanted to leave the safety of the sofa, lying down and curling herself into a ball. Then the silence had become deafening, and she took to pacing anxiously, counting her steps. When she lost count, her task interrupted by her wandering mind, she simply started over as though there had been no interruption, certain that if she stopped, she would unravel completely.
She was in love with Varric. She had kissed Nikola.
What if he left?
The door rattled, and then opened, and two greyhounds bounded in right for Helen, like a pair of missiles. Varric followed a moment later, closing the door behind him. He took his jacket off and leaned against the door, watching.
Her step faltered, but before she had time to consider what that meant, Evan nearly knocked her over. By the time they settled, Helen had ended up in the floor, greeting them both with a tired smile.
“There we are, my darlings.”
She pressed her nose to Winnie’s neck, closing her eyes and breathing deeply, drawing comfort. It was several minutes later before she finally looked up at him, eyes questioning.
He lifted both shoulders, then dropped them. "I love you Helen, and I'm upset. But I'm not going anywhere over a single thing."
She nodded carefully, her fingers tightening in the greyhound’s fur. Then she looked down again, voice soft.
“He asked me to stay. When I left England. Instead, I allowed John to destroy our friendship.” She glanced up at him, growing even quieter. “I was afraid I was losing him again.”
Varric still wasn't sure why a hug wasn't enough in that situation. He exhaled sharply out of his nose and approached, sitting on the couch and removing his boots. "You let your fears get to you too much, Rabbit."
“I love you. I never meant to make you feel otherwise.”
"This whole thing sounds like a subplot in one of my novels." Varric said, shaking his head and letting off a grunted laugh when he got his boots off.
"You love him too."
She shook her head. “Not in the same way.”
"I see." Varric leaned back on the couch, resting his hands behind his head and watching her and the dogs. "So how do we get past this bruising of trust?"
She lifted a shoulder helplessly, leaning against Winnie as Evan nuzzled her side. “I wish I had the answer to that.”
"Well I have an easy solution for that. I'll just have to kiss another woman." Varric patted
the seat next to him, beckoning Winnie over. He gave the dog a big smootch on the nose.
He was graced with a tiny, fleeting smile before she dipped her head again, studying her hands. “Perhaps if you met him?” She allowed the thought to trail off, having discounted it nearly as soon as the words had left her. What did she hope to prove?
“Will you ever be able to forgive me?”
"Of course," Varric replied. "It was only a kiss, upsetting as that is. As long as that's all it remains, I don't see much of a problem going forward."
“Nothing more will come of it. I promise you.” Even if she hadn’t been strong enough to do it herself, that door had been closed. And this time, she knew it wouldn’t be opening again.
Varric patted the couch on the other side of him, not wanting to dislodge Winnie. "Sit."
She hesitated only briefly before gently encouraging Evan off of her lap, patting her knee for him once she’d settled.
Varric put one arm around Helen and the other around Winnie. He had a smile on his face, but it still hadn't quite reached his eyes.
She pressed closer, desperate for the contact. “I love you. There is no one I would rather share my life with. I hope you know that,” she finished, whispering.
"I love you too, Helen." Varric's smile broadened slightly. He leaned against her, pulling her closer. "Who knew I was the jealous type."
"Who would have thought I would give you reason to be," she returned softly, closing her eyes as she settled against him.
“Not I.” Varric laughed. It was a long, stress-relieving type laugh. He kissed the side of her face, then her nose, then the top of her hair. “I love you.”
She tilted her head back to look at him, finding his hand and bringing it to her lips.
"Are we okay?"
Varric chuckled, nodding his head. "Yeah. We're okay. If this is the worst we go through, we'll be set."
She kissed his knuckles again before moving to stand, gently tugging him with her.
"Let's go to bed," she requested softly.
"Worn out?" He asked, letting her tug him to his feet. He slid his arms around her waist.
She shook her head. “I wasn’t intending to sleep. I have other things in mind.”
Varric grinned, pulling her closer. "Do tell. I'm all eager ears."
“I’d rather show you.”
"Show and tell was my favorite part of school," Varric quipped, letting Helen lead him to the bedroom.
“Was it? Then I hope I won’t disappoint.”
She slid out of his arms, tightening her fingers around his as she drew him into the bedroom, closing the door. As much as she loved them, she would prefer not to be interrupted by two energetic greyhounds just now.
Varric watched her, resisting the urge to press her against the door. He wanted to see what she had planned.
If she were honest, her plans went little further than showing him she loved him, reminding herself that he was still here, still hers.
Turning, she slid her arms around him, leaning close to whisper against his temple, holding him tightly. “Will you stay?”
"I haven't left yet," Varric pointed out.
“That isn’t what I’m asking.”
He shook his head, trying to reassure her. "It'll take more than this to chase me away, Rabbit."
She closed her eyes, shaking her head before pressing her forehead to his temple. “I want to share my life with you. All of it. I want us to have a home.”
And she wanted to know it was what he wanted, as well. She loved him. More than she ever could have imagined. She wanted reassurance that they no longer needed the safety of separate lives.
Varric raised an eyebrow. "Are you asking me to move in with you?" Maybe he was ready for that. Maybe.
She pressed closer, nodding.
"Maybe I want to. What would you do then?"
"Do you?"
"I think I need more convincing." Varric joked.
She shifted to kiss his jaw, then his neck, her grip loosening as she relaxed against him.
"How much more convincing?"
“That’s a good start....”
She hummed lightly, pulling back and reaching for his hand, drawing him toward the bed.
"I'll have to try harder, then."
Varroc laughed, and let himself be led!