She sat down, crossing her legs and taking a generous swig of her line. "I prefer to be honest in all aspects of my life, Nikola. This isn't excluded in that." She couldn't even think of how to say what she wanted to.
"I've tried ... many things to get you out of my head. I dislike strongly being one of those giddy young things that every girl thinks she'll be in a relationship. Romantic comedies wound me." Another sip of wine. "I even did try sleeping with a woman. While enjoyable, and far more complicated than sleeping with me, I did it. I went on dates. I shagged a boy who had to have been at least ten years my junior. And strapping. And Scottish." She smiled fondly at that memory.
"And yet I wouldn't go back to any of them if you asked. I'd rather be here." There was the naked, painful admission.