Felix Dawkins (suburbiaphobic) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2018-09-06 01:02:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, !partner thread, eliot waugh, felix dawkins |
Who: Felix Dawkins and Eliot Waugh
When: Backdated: End of July
Where: Theirs and Margo's Apartment
What: Eliot has a bad dream
Rating/Warnings: Mostly Family Friendly; Dream involves death
Status: Complete
Felix had been living with Eliot and Margo for just under a month now and while it was beginning to feel like home there were still rare mornings where he’d wake up in Eliot’s bed, their bed, and briefly think that he needed to swing by his apartment before heading into work before he’d remember that all his things were at Eliot’s now.
On this particular morning, Felix was awoken by a little pink tongue licking his face. Cracking one eye open, he watched as Gerald moved back, his little tail wagging as he yipped at Felix. He didn’t know what time it was exactly, but Gerald clearly thought it was breakfastime.
“Alright. Give me a moment.” Felix reached for his cell phone and saw that it was after seven and that he had a text from one of his employees reminding him to check in with a client. As he set the phone back down on the bedside table, Gerald yipped again, “I said alright.” He scooped up the small dog and sat up, glancing at Eliot who was still fast asleep.
Were it not for the wiggling puppy in his grasp, Felix could have watched Eliot sleep until his boyfriend decided to wake up. Reaching out with his free hand, Felix brushed a few stray curls from Eliot’s forehead before getting up and leaving the room to feed Gerald and start the coffee.
***
Eliot’s dreams were definitely starting to take a turn he hadn’t been anticipating. He’d really thought from the way it looked that he was going to end up with Quentin but then Mike had shown up and Quentin seemed to be into Alice. But they were still friends and that was good too right? Or at least that’s what his dream self seemed to be intent on convincing himself of. The dream tonight was darker than he’d been expecting and he was trying to fight his way out of it, not wanting to see what happened after Penny got stabbed. After his boyfriend got taken into custody for doing it. After finding out he’d been trying to stab Quentin.
But no matter how hard he tried to wake up he couldn’t. Not until after he saw himself use magic to snap Mike’s neck. He sat up in his bed, the word no coming out of him in a gasp as his mind replayed the image again and again. He looked around, realizing that the room was empty and a little dark voice in his head whispered that he might have done something to Felix which was why the bedroom was empty. He staggered out of his bed, breathing hard as he looked around, panic setting in a little when he didn’t see Gerald anywhere. Margo’s room...she’d be able to help calm him down and think rationally.
He was making his way over there when he heard a noise in the kitchen off to the side and he turned his head, seeing the puppy moving around in there and he stepped to the opening, letting out a little relieved sound when he saw Felix going through his morning routine and he leaned against the wall, just watching him.
***
It took Felix a moment before he realized that Eliot had come into the kitchen, but when he did, he realized right away that something was wrong. “El, are you alright?” He frowned slightly as he moved towards his boyfriend while Gerald was distracted by his breakfast. “You look like you’ve seen a bloody ghost.” He couldn’t help but wonder if Eliot had had another dream and if something bad had happened in it.
***
Eliot normally would try to put a good face on when he saw that look on his boyfriend’s face but this time he couldn’t. He ran his hand back through his hair as he tried to figure out how to tell him what had happened. “No. I’m not. I...I had another dream.” He said softly. “I did something in it that...I killed the guy I was dating.” He told him, pain obvious in his voice. “And when you weren’t there I thought I’d done something to you in my sleep.”
***
“Fuck…” Felix reached out and wrapped his arms around Eliot, pulling him into a tight hug. He couldn’t imagine having a dream like that and then thinking he’d done something without being able to control himself, “El, everything’s okay. I’m okay.” There were so many questions Felix had about Eliot’s dream such as what had caused him to kill his boyfriend, but that could wait until later.
***
Eliot let Felix pull him in, leaning his head against the shorter man as he closed eyes, trying to keep from breaking down even further. “No it’s not…. I used magic to do it. And I can still feel it. How it felt the moment I snapped his neck.” He whispered to him.
***
Felix hated hearing the despair in Eliot’s tone and it only caused him to hold him closer, “It was a dream, El. It wasn’t real.” Although Felix knew just how real the dreams could feel. Felix could still remember the way it had felt when Paul had held him down, part of him thinking the other man was going to shoot him, but instead had simply put the gun in his hand so that his prints would be on it, making it easy to frame him for murder if Sarah didn’t do what he’d wanted. “You didn’t really hurt anyone.”
***
Eliot took a deep breath and nodded his head at that reassurance. Felix reminding him that he hadn't done it here. That it had just been in the Dreams. “I'm just...I’m glad that I didn't hurt you.” he whispered. He couldn't live with himself if he had.
***
Felix released Eliot, but only enough so that he could press a kiss to his lips before pulling back, “I know you wouldn’t hurt me.” Whatever the reason he’d had to kill his boyfriend in the dreams, Felix knew that there was a reason. Eliot wasn’t the type to just kill someone in cold blood. “Whatever happened there, it won’t happen here.”
***
“He...Mike tried to attack Quentin. And ended up getting Penny. A few months ago when Penny ended up in the hospital here? And that little blonde of his contacted Margo to ask if she had any clue what to do since he was dying of poison? That was because of Mike. ...He used a poisoned blade. I don’t know where he got it but he had it.” Eliot said, eyes closing tight as the words spilled out of him.
***
“Fuck….” Felix brought a hand up to brush Eliot’s hair away from his forehead, fingers brushing through it soothingly, “No matter what happened, you saved Quentin, right? I can’t imagine doing what you did, but it was to save someone else.” Felix was doing his best to try and console Eliot.
***
Eliot never would have imagined being able to talk to anyone about the people in his dreams the way he could Felix. Well except for Margo but he would talk to her about this later. About Mike and Quentin and Penny. “Yeah I saved him but...this is the second time I’ve used my magic to kill someone in the dreams. I can’t shake the worry that I’ll do it here. That I’ll accidentally lash out against someone.” He confessed. “Lose control of it.” He had control issues and he knew it but it was one of the reasons he’d gone to work for himself and he liked to think it was one of the things that made him successful - that attention to detail and need for things to be perfect.
***
“You won’t. You can control your magic better than you think,” Felix hated that the dreams could have this affect on Eliot, but what he hated more was that he was plagued with the memories having done those things, “I know that you wouldn’t do anything like that unless you absolutely had to.” He needed Eliot to believe him, because then it might help Eliot to believe in himself.
***
Eliot knew that Felix was right when he said he had better control of his magic than that. He practiced as much as he could so that he would, using it around the apartment every chance he could so that he knew exactly what he could and couldn’t do with it. He gave his boyfriend a small smile that almost reached his eyes. “Keep reminding me of that when I need it?”
***
“I’ll remind you of that all the time.” Felix was glad that he had been able to reassure Eliot, but he hated that he’d needed to. Hated that the dreams had shown him something so horrible even if in the end he’d done what he had to save someone else. “Come. Sit down and I’ll get you some coffee.”
He led Eliot to one of the kitchen chairs then went to make him a cup of coffee as Gerald went to keep Eliot company. The little dog was very good at knowing when someone needed some comforting and he was sure that Eliot appreciated it.