InsaneJournal

"Too much weight and even the strongest bridge can collapse."
Who: Natasha, Neena and Moira
What: Moira notices some abnomalies in Neena's blood, and Natasha drops by for a spy to spy talk
When: Friday
Where: Moira's lab
Ratings/Warnings: PG-13 for dark thoughts
Status: COmplete



Moira was running a few more tests on Neena’s blood. She’d noticed some anomalies, but wanted to narrow down what those anomalies were - something from here or something from there. It didn’t appear dangerous, or to be any sort of time bomb, but she still wanted to find out what it was.

Scott was out somewhere, again, and Kitty was supposed to come in later ‘to play cards’ though they all knew why she was coming, and why there was always someone in that room with Neena. No one ever said it aloud, but they all knew.

She walked back into the room and declared, “Well yuir ready for solids again.”

"Gosh, solid food, whatever did I do without you," Came Neena's falsely cheerful reply. She looked up from her laptop and even managed a small smile for the doctor. She was only doing her job after all.

Neena was certain that part of Moira doing her job was making sure there was always someone there babysitting.

"What do ye want, I'll order in." Moira took a seat next to the bed. They'd recently moved Neena back to Moira's lab, which had been a small adventure in and of itself.

Natasha walked into the elevator, and pressed the button for the top floor. In her dreams there had been a name that had cropped up on SHIELD files, usually related to the X-men. Domino. They seemed to be in a similar line of work.

Neena shook her head, "I don't want anything, Moira."

She curled up a bit to give Moira room to sit, and brought her attention back to her laptop. Her Zen Garden was growing and she was having fun arranging the plants into patterns.

"I was lookin' through yuir blood tests, an' I saw somethin' unusual. It doesnae appear tae be related tae yuir confinment, however." Moira sounded puzzled.

"Vacation. I prefer Vacation." Fun for the whole family! She was writing Cerberus a strongly worded letter someday, explaining how much fun she'd had while she'd been their guest.

Hah. Funny. Guest. That's what Tolliver had called her, too. She frowned momentarily, then shook her head, "Get yourself something if you want. I'll buy."

"Vacation." Moira replied, not missing a beat, "But ye need tae eat. Especially until I can figure out what this this. It's probably related tae the dreams, like half the other shite I've examined lately."

"I'm not hungry." Neena shook her head, then looked up again to meet Moira's eyes, "So what is it with my blood this time? Am I going to turn into a seven year old or suddenly become mysteriously pregnant again or something?"

"Well the former is more likely than the latter," The doctor admitted. "It's like yuir DNA is assertin' itself more. It might be related tae turnin' off the chip, or it might just be the dreams takin' over again. It's tae early tae tell."

"The wierdest thing is that since they pulled me out of there I haven't had any nightmares related to that world. Just... other ones." Neena frowned. She didn't want to talk about the ones she was having.

She shook her head, "Are you saying I'm going to get even younger? Because I might scream if I have to go through puberty all over again after all of this."

"I hope not." Moira replied, laughing, "I wouldnae wish that on anyone! Could ye imagine it? Acne an' yuir first period all o'er again? Mine was horrible!"

"Heh, I don't even remember mine." Neena's brow furrowed as she tried to remember back that far, "Acne was pretty bad, but I was hiding out in a church at that point and barely went to school, so... I guess I didn't have to worry about people making fun of me."

"...No, wait, I think I'd run off by then. 15 or so?" She squinted, then shrugged a shoulder, "They still fuck you when you have pimples."

Moira pursed her lips, but was saved from any response by the sound of the elevator opening. A red-head stepped out of it. She was wearing expensive looking pumps, designer jeans, and a low cut red blouse. She looked like a movie star. Which she was.

The doctor got up and went to greet her, "Hello, how can I help ye?"

"I'm here to see Domino."

Neena watched Moira leave and flopped back against her pillows, muttering, "Saved by the bell."

"I dunnae think she should be seein' anyone right now, lass. If ye could come back later?"

Natasha shook her head, "I just want a few minutes. Tell her it's the Black Widow."

It wasn't exactly like the conversation couldn't be heard from where Neena was laying. She thought it was actually pretty damn amusing that suddenly, because of a few stray words here and there, Moira had decided she shouldn't be seeing any people.

Hadn't people been all over her room all day since Romany'd shot herself? And suddenly now she shouldn't be seeing people?

She shouted from her room, "I'm fine, and I can see people if I want to! Plus, I have cookies!"

She had a tin of them, somewhere. She'd made sure they'd packed the ones Merrill had sent up so that someone could enjoy them. It was too thoughtful a gift to be simply thrown out or turned away.

Just strangers, damn it. But it wasn't like the name was completely unfamiliar to Moira. She remembered the Avengers, at least some of the roster.

"Right. Great. Go see the bampot then," Moira replied, rolling her eyes. "She has cookies."

Natasha laughed, "Da, thank you." She stepped into the room, then closed the door behind her. She turned and studied the other woman, "Domino?"

"Natasha Romanova?" Neena lifted the tin of cookies and shook them in The Black Widow's direction, "No need to stand on ceremony here. We've probably already remembered each other's dossiers."

"Yes. At least enough to be interested in meeting you," The spy replied. She took a seat, crossing her legs and leaning forward. Her breasts threatened to spill out of her shirt, "I actually wonder how much in general you remember. Or if we are remembering the same world at all."

Neena raised an eyebrow, both at what the woman was saying and at the fact that containment was seriously about to breached on that shirt of hers. It was hard not to stare at a chest like that, no matter which way you swung.

"I remember a lot... there's very few gaps now." Neena tilted her head to the side, "But I'm not very interesting. Especially right now. Have a cookie. I hear they're delicious."

It was a tactic, and Natasha was using it. The shirt, that is. She nodded along to Neena's words, then pulled a cookie out of the package, "I could use a couple more pounds. Do you remember what your Stark was like?"

"He was an epic dick. I like this one much better, but I'm pretty sure he's not the same guy," Neena turned her head a bit and lifted her hair up, to show Natasha a small surgical bandage, "He recently helped hack a chip in my head so that it would stop short of actually killing me hopefully we think. He's a nice guy, here. If a little stressed out."

"He's different, yes. Still an ego maniac." She sat back, the motion holstering her girls for the time being. Her face remained very serious.

"I know you're still... well trained, here. I want you to train me."

The deadpan look on Neena's face pretty much said it all, but in case there still needed to be words spoken here, she opened her mouth and said, "You're crazy."

"I'm serious. This acting gig isn't fulfilling any more. I know I do my own stunts but the real thing is nothing like the show. Aliens and robots not withstanding."

"Well, nothing is really like it is in the shows, or the movies, with a few exceptions," Neena agreed, with a slight nod of her head. But she was still looking at Natasha like she was insane, "You had a lot more training than I did in that other world. And..."

She let out a sigh and pointed down at the healing holes in her arm, the burns that were still on her wrists, then gestured to various other bandages that were in eyesight, "I'm hardly in any shape to train anyone."

"The dreams and real life don't always mesh up perfectly. I'm a lot softer here. I don't... I don't even know. Compared to Tony, or even Clint, what can I bring to the table right now?"

Natasha was still holding the cookie, crumbling it in her fingers, "Should I even try?"

Her eyes roamed over the wounds and bandages, "Once you can walk."

"Should you? That's up to you." Neena set her laptop off to the side and curled in a bit, "Tony is a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist. He's got an iron suit and he flies around thinking he can save the world. But the reality of the life he's taking on? I don't think that's hit him yet."

She looked thoughtful, and a little sad, "Clint knows better. He's been there. He knows. You don't. That couple of week stint you had out there lost and surviving - good job on that actually. I caught up on the news... after... ...after my honeymoon."

Neena squeezed her eyes shut, "That stuff happens a lot. You'll be under real fire. Real bullets, flying at you. Real people, trying to kill you. Trying to kidnap you for information. Trying to torture you to get it. Your friends will be threatened, your family will be threatened. That's the life that awaits you if you put your training to the test."

"I don't know who I am any more," Natasha admitted, as Neena's words sunk in. She didn't know if she wanted that. If the thrill and the danger was worth it. She remembered being so tired at times.

"That Natasha, she's so old. She's seen so much. I can't deal with it some mornings."

"I believe that," Neena whispered. She was tired enough, and would have only been turning 40 this year, "I almost can't deal with it any morning, and I was never as old."

"I'm more agile. The weight I'm regaining is all muscle," Natasha said, quietly. "I don't know. It seems wrong to just let it go to waste."

Neena let out a long sigh, "I have a wire in my lung. Moira will probably never clear me for actual duty again. I don't know if I can train you. I have... there's a lot going on in my life. And some things I really need to deal with. What kind of training do you want?"

"I'm not terrible with a gun, but I could use more practice. Things like infiltration, computers. I know seduction." Natasha trailed off, then said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't drag you back into all this. But if even half the things in those files were true we'd have made a hell of a team."

"It's a shame that it's more likely we would have been on opposite teams," Neena agreed. Infiltration and computers, well. She knew enough to hack her way into security systems and things, but not nearly as much as Kitty did. She'd had to know enough to scout ahead and report back.

"Guns are a good weapon of choice, but it's important to remember what they were made for. If you don't aim properly, you're going to kill your target eventually if not right away. If you're only shooting to injure, it's important to know where to shoot. You'll want to practice that. Anatomy is important. Know where the arteries are, where the bones are that bullets are likely to ricochet off of instead of piercing."

"Ammunition type matters as well, too, right?" She rubbed at her wrists, "I used this special type of gauntlet. Electric shock weapons, spy tools..."

"Hollow point rounds do more damage but don't ricochet, so they're a good ammunition for times when you know you're firing guns off in civilian areas." Neena nodded.

"Electric shock weapons are a good idea. I liked to use bolas to disarm people, too. It's less messy and gets them into melee range," She added, after a bit of thought.

"I called it the widow's bite. Isn't that just corny?"

"Only a little corny," Neena managed a bit of an amused smile, and shook her head, "We never would have worked together if you'd kept calling it that."

Natasha laughed, "Really, is it any cornier than Domino? Or Captain America? You'd think we were in a comic book."

The amused smile faded away from Neena's face, and she glanced off to the side, "I didn't come up with that name. Milo gave it to me. I was his little Domino. It's... corny, but it was pretty much all of him I had left."

"Oh." Natasha felt a little stupid. She hadn't meant to dredge up a hurt, or to insult someone's memory, "I'm sorry."

"God, listen to me. We just met and I'm already depressing you." Neena shook her head, "It's fine. I'm in a place where all of the old hurts seem to be more sensitive than usual. And Captain America really is a dorky name. But a lot of the names we had did. Cyclops. Shadowcat. Multiple Man. Psylocke. Seriously, we could have been some kind of after school cartoon."

"What kind of after-school cartoon has some of the atrocities we've seen?" Natasha shook her head. It was too real to ever be faked. Too dark.

She finally put a cookie into her mouth.

"They'd have to make up more fun things for all of us muties and superheros to be doing, that's true." Neena agreed. She looked away as Natasha ate the cookie, then down at her hands for a bit.

Natasha eyed her through her lashes, "Do you want to talk about it? Assassin to assassin."

"It's really fucking stupid."

It was. Neena was absolutely certain of that. She'd survived enough in her life that being this affected by a week or so in captivity should have been nothing. It was hard to describe to anyone who hadn't been through the things she'd been through before all of this, who didn't understand that she should have been so very over this by now. Back up on her feet, even. Like it had never happened. Like she'd been able to do so many times before.

She was still looking down at her hands.

“Nothing affecting you like this could possibly be stupid.”

"The stupid part is the part where it's affecting me at all. I'm tougher than this. I've been tougher than this since I was 13 years old."

The woman in the bed sounded angry, but most of the anger was directed at herself, "My entire life fell apart but I'm supposed to be able to get over that. I'm supposed to be stronger than that. I'm supposed to be able to dust myself off. And I feel like something broke. They finally broke something that can't be repaired by doing any of that. They broke the thing that made me capable of doing that. God. I can't even watch someone eat."

Natasha said nothing throughout Neena's diatribe. She could only listen, and let the woman get it out. It sounded like she needed to. Gently, she said, "Too much weight and even the strongest bridge can collapse."

"... well it did, and it has." Neena shook her head, "I'll think about it. Training you. Not tonight, obviously."

If the words sounded like a dismissal, they were. She was scared what else she'd reveal to this random not-so-much-a-stranger if they continued to speak to each other. There were some things she just didn't want to talk about, even if they did spill out of her mouth.

And she thought maybe she was making Natasha uncomfortable. There was that, too.

Tasha got the hint, and got to her feet. Really, Neena was scaring her, but it was a good kind of fear. A fear of where she could end up. She gave Neena the traditional kiss on the cheek, "No rush."

It was a very real fear and Neena had wanted her to know that, so at least there was that. She closed her eyes as Natasha kissed her cheek. Tears had spontaneously sprung up from the action that she didn't want to cry, especially in front of the infamous Black Widow.

"Leave me your number. Thanks for visiting. ... If you like those cookies, take them with you."

What, should she say 'eat the cookies or the terrorists win'? Natasha wasn't sure what to do. So she took two, and left the rest on the table.

At the doorway she paused, and then asked? "Does it ever get wiped clean?"

Did it? Neena looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Ask me again sometime."