Leon Orcot (under_arrest) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2017-10-15 19:39:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, leon orcot, sans |
Who: Leon, Sans and NPC!Chris
What: Sans surprises Leon with a not-so-surprise visit
When: Immediately after this exchange (Early September)
Where: Leon's apartment, then an ice cream parlor
Rating/Warning: Low/language because it's Leon
Status: Complete
Leon closed out of Valar and thought nothing more of his conversation with the weirdo who claimed he could teleport - no, sorry, could ‘spatially compress’ or whatever the hell the crazy term for ‘teleport’ was. He wasn’t sure if giving the guy his address was a good idea, but Leon had checked out the apartments in Sharon’s building and had already signed the lease for a nice two bedroom suite. He’d be gone by the end of the month, so it would only really be a problem over the next couple of weeks.
Chris was watching cartoons, and Leon decided to check in on his Sims. There was a part of him that thought maybe he should actually do some cleaning - the sink was piled high with dishes, and Leon and Chris’s dirty laundry was strung out all over the small apartment - not much bigger than a bachelor suite. Somehow, Chris had even managed to get a pair of underwear on the ceiling fan. But he’d had a long day at work, and he really didn’t feel up to doing anything that required much more effort than keeping his pixelated people from drowning in the swimming pool. Posters of topless women, sports stars, and cars lined the walls. He probably should have taken down the women when Chris moved in, but he hadn’t thought about it.
***
It did take Sans a few tries to get the address right, but when he did something right, oh man, did he DO it. In this case, “doing it” was appearing in Leon's bathroom. Outside he could hear cartoons on the TV. He cracked the door open and peered out.
Indeed, Chris (that was the kid's name, right?) was watching cartoons, and a man who must be Leon the Unbeliever was seated, facing away from Sans, doing something on his computer. A closer look revealed the Sims, and Sans grinned. He crept out of the bathroom and behind Leon, then leaned in close and whispered, “They nerfed the pool ladder thing in Sims 3, if that's what you're trying to do. It's not so Simsple anymore.”
***
Leon didn’t scream. It just wasn’t something he did. What he did do was let out a very manly cry of surprise, and managed to throw his laptop into the television as he bolted up from his seat. He spun around, not seeing how the television wobbled on its stand, or how the picture on the screen had suddenly gone wonky, or how Chris looked up with surprise on his face but with a much milder reaction.
“What. The. Fuck?” Leon cried, automatically reaching for the pistol he usually carried in an under arm holster. He realized belatedly that he didn’t actually wear his gun inside his own apartment, and now that Chris was here he had it locked inside a safe on the top shelf of his closet. “Who the fuck are you and what are you doing in my apartment?”
***
Sans let out a soft “whoopsie” and reached out, catching the TV and laptop with a little blue magic and raising both to sit back on the stand. The laptop floated over and returned to Leon’s side, almost apologetic. “I’ll, uh. Pay for that, sorry.”
But he shrugged at the question. “You said I could come over. Like. Just now. See?” He pulled out his phone and pulled up the post with the address, Leon’s account name and avatar pic right next to it. “Wait, I am in the right place, right?” Wouldn’t that just be embarrassing…
***
Leon’s heart was pounding so loudly in his ears that he barely heard the man’s explanation, especially so when his shit started floating. Chris watched, wonderstruck. Eventually, Leon clued into the fact that he was holding his phone in Leon’s face, and Leon’s eyes narrowed so he could peer closer at the screen. He remembered suddenly his inviting the guy over. Giving him his address.
He hadn’t expected the man to actually appear. He took a deep, steadying breath, and glanced back over at the TV. “No, don’t worry about it,” he grumbled. He wanted to be angry, but he couldn’t see how he possibly could be when Leon had all but invited the guy over. “It was my fault. I wasn’t expecting you to just… show up like that. Chris are you okay?” Leon asked, which was clearly a stupid question now that he looked, because his crybaby little brother was looking at Sans as though he was the best thing since sliced bread.
***
“I literally told you I can teleport, buddy,” Sans said with a hint of a smirk. What were you expecting when dealing with teenage teleporters given an open invitation? Them not to appear in your house?
He glanced at Chris too, just to be sure; Sans liked pranks and bothering people who deserved it, but kids didn’t deserve to be pranked on or bothered. But Chris seemed fine, excited even. Sans knew how to get him extra excited. “Hey buddy? Want some ice cream? Only if bro says it’s okay, of course. He can come with us, I know a great place not too far away.” Granted, not too far away for Sans could be a fairly sizeable distance for other people, but hey, ta-may-to, ta-mah-to. He glanced at the TV as well, picture still rather off-kilter. “And maybe a trip to the electronics store too, huh? See what we can do.”
***
“Yeah, and I literally told you that I thought you were insane,” Leon muttered under his breath.
Leon gave an exasperated sigh. It wasn’t like he could say no to ice cream, not when Chris was looking at him with those big, blue eyes of him. But he had no intention of ‘spatially compressing’ to the ice cream shop, and had even less of an intention to let his kid brother wander off with some teleporting weirdo before Leon had done a thorough background check on him. He glared at Sans, trying to think of a way out of this mess, and then Chris was grabbing his hand.
“I fucking hate this,” he muttered, and then more clearly added, “So what exactly are we supposed to do? Hold hands and do a dance?”
***
“See, there was your mistake. You presented a false hypothesis, I had to prove it wrong. First lesson of science, kiddo,” Sans said, addressing Chris. “Make sure no one can disprove your argument in less than five minutes.”
He shrugged. “I mean, if you wanna do a dance, I’m not gonna stop you. With the girls I babysit - told you I had references - I make them hang onto me just ‘cause otherwise I’m worried they’ll go running off somewhere as soon as we get where we’re going. But yeah, not necessary.” He approached the front door, thought, for a long moment, about where he wanted to go and sought out a shortcut to get there, then knocked once on the door to make sure no one was on the other side and opened it. The door, which had probably once opened into the hallway outside of the apartment, now led to an alleyway across from the ice cream shop in question. Sans stood back and gestured to the other two. “Guests first.”
***
Leon stared. That wasn’t where his door was supposed to go. His door was supposed to lead into a hallway with vaguely yellowed walls, with a light that had been flickering for the last six months down the hall. It didn’t lead outside, and definitely not into some alleyway somewhere.
This was a dream. It had to be a dream.
“Chris, take my hand,” Leon said, and Chris quietly complied. Leon wasn’t sure if he trusted going through the door, so he’d go through first. But he also didn’t want to let go of Chris’ hand. “Here goes,” he muttered, and then stepped sideways out the door so that he was completely through the door before Chris could follow him.
***
Nothing happened. Well, obviously, Leon went through a doorway but, like, nothing bad happened. Sans shrugged at him. “It’s safe, I told you. I’m not like, some crazy person.” He gestured for Chris to go through as well, then followed them both out and closed the door behind them. The door on this side was heavy steel, probably the backdoor for some store. Sans shrugged at it and turned to the other two, hands in his pockets. “So, ice cream?”
***
Leon glared at Sans, beginning to wonder if it wasn't he himself who was losing his damn mind. He had a few choice words to say to him, but then he remembered that Chris was still there, hand in Leon’s, and was nodding eagerly to the idea of ice cream.
“Yeah, fine,” he snapped instead. “Let's get this ice cream and be done with this whole nightmare.” With a purpose, he walked into the ice cream shop and took a moment to look at the flavours. He’d never actually been to this location before.
***
“Hey, when is ice cream ever a nightmare?” Sans asked, mock offended. “Just ‘cause something’s new to you doesn’t make it a nightmare. Right, buddy?” He turned his attention to Chris. “Second science lesson today, keep this up and you’ll be the smartest kid in your class.”
Sans strolled after them, a bit slower, not quite basking in having obviously thrown Leon off but definitely still a little smug. He knew what he wanted (bubblegum ice cream with gummy bears, the only good ice cream combination there was, thank you very much) so he hung back until they were ready to choose. They probably looked a bit weird, a guy wearing gym shorts and sparkly pink Uggs and a pair that looked like father and son, all getting ice cream together, but hey, this was the OC. Weirder stuff happened all the time.
***
Leon bit back his retort, deciding that he might as well try to be nice to this guy. Especially since Chris seemed happy enough. Leon didn’t trust this Sans guy further than he could throw him, but he didn’t need to make a scene in the ice cream store.
“What do you think, Chris? Strawberry sound good?” he asked. He didn’t need to look at the menu. As far as Leon was concerned, there were only three ice cream flavours - Vanilla, Chocolate, and Strawberry. Leon was partial to vanilla, but he still didn’t really know if Chris prefered Strawberry or Chocolate. But Chris gave a hesitant nod at Strawberry, so Leon assumed that it was probably good enough.
***
Hey, the kid was happy, Sans was happy. Because he was a good babysitter. Showing off the skills. And Sans didn’t feel like dunking on anyone, especially not when ice cream was on the line. Ice cream didn’t deserve to see that.
Also Leon seemed like someone who could make some repercussions should some dunking occur. Sans didn’t need repercussions.
Ice cream worked out, Sans placed his order and waited for the other two to make theirs, since he fully intended to pay. He had accidentally broken their TV after all (which he also intended to replace) and he wasn’t a bad guy to anyone but his former RA. He was gonna make his amends. “Whatever you guys want,” he said, gesturing to the freezer. “My treat, promise.”
***
Chris tugged on Leon’s hand, and then pointed at Sans. Leon stared at him until a moment, and then comprehension dawned. “Seriously?” Leon asked, frowning. “That shit is going to give you cavities like you wouldn’t believe.” But Chris’s gaze didn’t waver, and Leon let out an exasperated sigh.
“I guess I’ll get a soft vanilla and a small one of whatever bubblegum crap this guy’s ordering,” Leon said, jerking a thumb at Sans as he referenced him. Magical portals and bubblegum ice cream. Apparently Sans was going to be a bad influence on his little brother.