Who: Leon and Alecto What: Alecto uses magic to mess with Leon When: A few weeks ago Where: The precinct Rating/Warning: Low/none Status: Complete
Alecto was a lot of things. One of those things was a pain in the ass. Every so often, a crime case came along and that meant Leon came with it. Oh, Leon. She’d enjoyed fucking with him in very small ways in the last couple of weeks. Things would move to different places or just made so he couldn’t see them. She’d let him go searching for it for a while before making it visible again just to watch him sweat. She was pretty sure this was what people were supposed to do when they were attempting to make friends or be friends. She might have gotten the idea wrong, but she was pretty sure this was how it was done.
Today, she’d put a sticking charm on a few pieces of evidence. It wasn’t like it was going to contaminate the evidence. It just meant that he couldn’t pick it up off the ground. Then she would swoop over and offer to help, only to magically be able to pick it up just fine. It was totally the funniest, right?
Okay, so maybe she was an asshole and this was the wrong way to make friends, but it wasn’t like he knew it was her. And it wasn’t like she did it every day. Just some days…
“Having difficulty?”
Leon was having a hell of a time lately. He figured it must have been stress from the recent upheaval in his life. He very rarely misplaced much of anything. Even when he was drunk enough to put his keys in unlikely places, such as the fridge, he usually remembered after only a couple of seconds of searching the next morning. But it seemed like he was misplacing, or totally overlooking, things all week. Sometimes even important things like pieces of evidence.
And this… well, he had no idea what to make of this. Maybe he should think about going to see a doctor, since there had to be something incredibly wrong with his hand-eye coordination. Hell, even the misplacing things seemed like it could be some kind of neurological problem. As far as he knew there was no dementia in his family, but he had had a few concussions in his day. Maybe that had something to do with it.
Whatever it was, he couldn’t seem to pick the shoe off the ground. It was almost like it was glued there, except for the fact that it was still in the evidence bag and he was completely positive that there was no glue anywhere near it.
He heard someone approach from behind, and then he heard Alecto’s voice. He couldn’t say he was the biggest fan. She was annoying and really strange. “No,” he snapped over his shoulder. “I’m doing just fine.” He tried, and failed, to once again lift the bag off the ground.
Alecto tried to keep the smile off her face, but it really wasn’t working. At least she wasn’t openly mocking him. She was pretty sure that was not the way to make friends. Most of the time she thought maybe she should be more like Gourry, but then...she wasn’t like him. She was the opposite of him. Even if he had probably misplaced his sensibilities when it came to liking her and agreeing to date her. But there they were.
Quietly she pushed him out of the way, muttering the counterspell. “I’ve got this. Maybe your muscles are malfunctioning. Needs a little finesse. And yes, she did pick up the evidence bag without any trouble before handing it over to him. “Here you go.”
One of these days she would tell him the story, but she wasn’t sure if he was dreaming or not yet. Hopefully she wouldn’t get shot in the foot or something for this. “Happens to the best of us. One day I was so tired, I could barely lifts my cup of coffee to my mouth. The worst.” He was probably going to be angry about this later, but she could deal with that.
Leon frowned, not quite being able to shake the feeling that Alecto was laughing at him for some reason. “My muscles are fine,” Leon snapped, snatching the evidence bag aggressively from her. He was glad to see that he could apparently grip it now. He still had no idea what happened, but not having enough ‘finesse’ was obviously not the answer.
“Yeah?” he asked, his voice taking more of an exasperated tone than an angry one. He had a bit of a short temper, but he tried to rein it in at work. At least to his coworkers. Besides, even if she was laughing at him, it wasn’t as if she was the reason he was losing his damn mind. First walking skeletons - apparently some movie stunt, though they didn’t seem like effects - and now all of this. “Don’t think I’ve ever been that tired before. What are you doing over here anyway? Do you have those photos ready already?”
Alecto was definitely being an asshole, but it was at least amusing and it didn’t involve stealing random things from the scene, so it was a half step forward. “So angry today.” Okay, so he was angry like...every day. It was totally normal for him to always be grumpy and snippy. “Did you get your Wheaties and coffee this morning?”
She shrugged. “You looked like you could use some help, obviously. I was being a kind and thoughtful co-worker. Isn’t that what people are supposed to do?” Well, maybe they weren’t supposed to use magic to prank their unsuspecting co-workers and then help them. “I got the photos, yes. I’ll get them developed and sent to you as soon as possible. Are you sure you don’t need a coffee, though? You look a little sleepy. Also you’re extra grumpy today.”
Leon chose to ignore her jab at his temper. “Great, thanks,” he said. For all her other faults, she was good at her job at least. “I’m not that tired,” he said. With his thumb on one and his two fingers on the other, he rubbed his eyes. “I could probably use a coffee though. It’s been a long couple of weeks.”
Of all the things, Alecto enjoyed her job. She was morbid in general, so it fit in with her interests. “You look kind of tired,” she said, studying him for a moment. “So what’s changed over the last couple of weeks? From whatever it was before.” It wasn’t like she knew his life. She knew, from the network, that he had a brother. She didn’t really know anything past that and some random work-related things. It wasn’t like she spent a lot of time getting to know everyone she worked with. She wasn’t really good at people. Most of the time she used Rebekah as her ‘what to do in general human interaction’ guide.
“Well, my brother’s staying with me now,” Leon said, walking toward the break room. “He was adopted by my aunt and uncle when he was a baby, but they recently died in a car crash, so he’s come to live with me. He’s pretty shaken up about his parents’ deaths, so it’s not exactly a walk in the park.” He frowned. “Well, he’s better than most kids at least.” Most kids were obnoxious, rude, and noisy. “I’m going to have to start looking for a new apartment too. Mine’s not exactly built for two.”
He dropped the shoe off at his desk as he passed it. “And did you see that fucking movie gimmick the other day? We had calls coming in all goddamn weekend. Whoever came up on that must have been on drugs. Someone should sue the studio; they’re lucky more people weren’t hurt.”
Well, that was definitely...not the story she expected. She maybe felt a little bad for messing with him now when he was apparently dealing with a lot of stuff. “My brother’s the same age as me. Well, give or take a few minutes.” She couldn’t remember exactly which one of them was older, but she always liked to think that she was obviously the older one. Not that it actually mattered. “Never really had that whole situation to deal with. I’m sure there’s places around, though.” She might keep an ear open.
She snorted lightly, however, at the mention of the ‘movie gimmick’. “Not to burst your perfect bubble, but that was definitely not a movie gimmick. You’re on the network. You’ll learn eventually that most of the fucked up shit you see, is really happening. The people eat up the weirdo lies that are made up by whoever the lie-makers are.” She shrugged. “No, that shit was real. I blew up a few zombie things. It was great.” She was pretty sure anyone that heard her would assume she meant in a video game.
“You have a twin?” Leon asked, genuinely surprised. “Man, I can’t imagine there being two of you. But I’ll figure it all out somehow.” Somehow he’d find a way to make it all work.
Leon raised an eyebrow at her. “And here I thought there were just the odd crazy on the Network. I’m beginning to wonder if it isn’t a forum just for insane people.” After all, there was no way zombies could exist. He wondered if the girl he’d let babysit Chris was as crazy as the rest of them. She’d seemed normal enough, but now Leon wasn’t so sure. “I hope you had a permit for those explosives. Ugh, who the fuck finished off the coffee and didn’t make a new pot?!” He angrily grabbed the empty coffee pot from the burner and started preparing a fresh pot.
Alecto nodded. “He's the responsible one.” He hadn't always been, but he'd had to change with life. Alecto had changed some, but she didn't have a lot of things to worry about, so she hadn't become exceptionally responsible. She paid her bills on time and didn't drink herself to death anymore and wind up in weird places, but she also didn't always take things seriously. At least not as seriously as her parents would have liked.
“You're funny. Just wait until you're as mad as the rest of us.” But hey. People's beliefs weren't always such that they were open to the insanity. Alecto just went with it and then got excited about magic. “You bet. Got my papers on me always.” She snorted lightly again. “Are you sure you aren't already as mad as the rest of us?” She didn't usually have to worry about the coffee and she was definitely the sort of person that left the coffee pot empty and didn't make any new coffee. Woops.
“What, wait until I’m going on about zombies and teleporting?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “Yeah, that’s never gonna happen. Sorry ‘bout that.” He finished preparing the pot, and then leaned against the counter, his palms resting on the countertop behind him while he waited for it to percolate. “And hey, I’m pretty mad, but I don’t think in the same sense that you’re using.” No. He was mad because he had to actually wait for his coffee. Cops did not wait for coffee; there was always supposed to be some ready and waiting for them.
“Or something.” Not that she knew what he was going to dream. She didn’t know that much about his potential dreams. She hadn’t met anyone that didn’t dream, however. She was sure she’d find something out eventually. Even if she needed to be nosy about it. “You're downright barmy, but that's another matter entirely.” There was a teasing smile to go with the tone in her voice. “Don't worry, I've been told I am, too. And people get weird looks on their faces when I tell them my job.” And Gourry always seemed concerned about it. Like she was going to be attacked by the dead. Well...maybe she would be, but she had magic to deal with that.
Leon scowled, but made a conscious effort not to raise to the bait. It was a lot easier when she was using ridiculously British terms like ‘barmy.’ “Yeah, it takes a special kind of weirdo to want to take photos of dead people,” Leon said, not unkindly. Given that he worked in homicide, it wasn’t like he had any room to talk. He frowned thoughtfully, looked at the coffee pot, and realized that there’d still be a little bit before he could pour himself a cup. “What made you want to do this anyway? Most kids don’t grow up wanting to be a crime scene photographer.” Though, he realized belatedly, just because the only thing he’d ever wanted to do for as long as he could remember was be a cop, it didn’t mean that everyone followed their childhood career path.
Alecto shrugged. “I got in the habit of morbid facts because it was the easiest way to get people to leave me alone at my parents’ parties. Then I just kept looking for more things in the vein.” She probably could have turned into a serial killer for all she knew, but it was just so much work to kill people and then keep from getting discovered while also wanting to get discovered. Really, the whole thing just sounded like a full time job and she wasn’t nearly ambitious enough for all that. Which was different from the dreams, but then she had magic in the dreams, soooo that didn’t count. “My parents sent us to boarding school after my brother jumped from the second floor and broke a table and himself a little. I guess I just got into photography at some point and then my parents used it to bribe me into moderately okay behaviour.” And it had worked pretty well. “When Amycus left for New York, I followed after him and went to school for photography. University. I sort of discovered the whole forensic photography thing there. It meant I had to do a lot of nauseating wedding and engagement pictures, but then I ended up here. Both in forensic photography and the OC.” And that was the general story of her life.
Leon snorted. Out of all the reasons to brush up on morbid facts, that seemed like a good one. Not that he’d ever had to worry about interacting people at parties his parents threw. His dad had his cop buddies over for drinks and poker in the garage sometimes, but his mother’s health had always been to frail for any big to-dos, and Leon’s dad had never really been what someone would call ‘social’ anyway. It was probably what happened when people spent all day dealing with the worst of humanity.
“Yeah, I can’t exactly see you doing wedding photography anyway.” He shrugged. “I guess out of all the places you could have ended up, it’s alright you ended up here.” Almost a compliment. She annoyed him, but she was one of the better forensic photographers on the force.
Alecto realized an almost compliment when she heard it. She guessed she could dial down her general Leon-related fuckery. At least until he annoyed her again. Then all bets were definitely off. She could promise nothing then. “People are just so happy.” Her nose wrinkled slightly. Totally ignoring the fact that she had somehow fell into a relationship herself, but she wasn’t gross about it. Probably. Maybe. Okay, perhaps she was a little gross, but no one had to know about it.
“Plus, the dead people speak to me. In a non-literal sort of way. If the dead actually start talking to me, that’s when I’ll know there’s a problem.” She shrugged slightly, a mostly nonchalant sort of way. She wasn’t worried about the dead talking back. At least not in the weird Sixth Sense or whatever terrible movie she’d watched sort of way. “At least it looks like you’ll have coffee soon.”
“The only thing I like about weddings is bachelor parties,” Leon agreed. At least they had that in common. He was a little worried about her for a second, until he realized she was talking about the dead metaphorically speaking to her. In the police sense kind of way. He shook his head. All this talk about magic was messing with his head.
“Yeah. Then I can get back to work,” he said. He mulled over it for a moment, and then said “Thanks.” She had helped him with that fucking shoe earlier. And somehow had managed to take his mind off whatever was wrong with him. He could concentrate on work now, and hey, if he didn’t suddenly lose his ability to grip things again, he could probably avoid the hospital visit.