WHO:Clint Barton & Tony Stark WHEN: early September WHERE: Clint's place WHAT: Tony Stark is a giant girl. So is Clint. They are gossipy girls. WARNINGS: Nada STATUS: Complete
Tony made a habit of just showing up on Clint’s doorstep without calling ahead or letting his friend know he was coming by. Today was one of those such days. Tony and a very expensive bottle of scotch rang the doorbell and waited, hearing barking on the other side. Tony liked Clint’s dog as much as he liked any other animal. Which wasn’t all that much, to be honest. So the Iron Man waited while the barking died down, then held up the bottle when the door opened.
As much as the doorbell at least vibrated on a level that Clint tended to feel as much as hear, the real clue that anyone was at the door was always Lucky. Getting him to calm was becoming less of a hassle since Kate lived there and he was usually less excited when it wasn’t Kate. Throwing a ball for the dog to chase down the hall, Clint grabbed the door and just smirked at the sight of Tony Stark on his door step with a bottle.
“Hey dude, seriously, I have no idea why you bother knocking anymore.” And because Tony wasn’t the sort to really dig a dog climbing over him to mark his territory, keeping Lucky in the bedroom wasn’t too big a deal. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“Do I have to have a reason to come over and share a drink with my friend?” Tony asked, raising an eyebrow. He was smiling, though, as he moved into the apartment and glanced around. “It’s cleaner here since Kate moved in,” he mentioned aloud, then turned to head into the kitchen. “Glasses?” He asked, though he knew exactly which cupboard to dig into to find them.
“No, of course not, just… I usually drop in on you.” Which was true, but hey, maybe Tony was finally learning to stop tinkering so damn much with everything and actually do normal human things. “Yeah, well… it’s not a bachelor’s place anymore, is it?” It wasn’t that Kate cleaned everything. It was just that they were both more likely to pick up after themselves these days.
Grabbing some glasses, because apparently Tony was playing dumb or just didn’t want to. “Then again, I bring food, you bring booze. I think that’s an okay balance.”
Well, and it wasn’t just cleaner. The place was in better repair; the sofa was less dingy, there were curtains on the window… it looked… cleaner. Crisper. He turned to Clint with a bright grin on his face. “This is why we make a great team.” And he opened the bottle to pour.
“...just how much do you know about my… relationship with Pepper Potts in the Dream world?” Tony asked, giving them each a generous pour of liquor into the glasses. He was focused on his task, and not looking at Clint even though he was speaking to the other man.
“Um…” For all that Tony was one of Clint’s closest friends, dream wise and otherwise, there wasn’t a lot about his relationships that Clint knew. At first it was because Tony separated Iron Man and Tony Stark for the sake of safety (likely Pepper’s and his company’s) and afterwards it was either because he was leading the West Coast Avengers or their personal lives just took back seats, “I know you guys used to date, but… she hasn’t really taken much involvement with the Avengers stuff so,” Clint just shrugged a little.
“I think she’s married.” To Happy, if Clint was remembering correctly, after Tony’s brain rebooted and he came out of the coma to help them knock down Osborn at New Asgard or whatever they were calling that now. “Different dreams though.”
Well, that absolutely wasn’t what Tony wanted to hear. His brow furrowed with distaste, and he turned to Clint accusingly, as if it was Clint’s fault. He momentarily forgot that they had different Dream worlds. “To who?”
“Hogan? Happy? I mean, I think that’s his name. Is his name actually Happy? Because I am seriously confused?” Taking a drink of whatever it was Tony brought, Clint just shrugged off the accusing look and took a seat on his not at all trashy sofa. “You’re almost to the level of whore as me from what I dream. I say almost because you had a nano-virus that slowed you down a little or whatever.”
Rebooting your brain might do that to a guy. “Why? What’s going on? What’s your relationship with Pepper like in your dreams?” And he totally wasn’t getting nasty with that.
Tony’s eyebrows shot up toward his hairline. “Happy Hogan? Pepper is married to Happy Hogan?” That was almost too much. He almost couldn’t handle that thought. He had to take a big gulp from his glass to wash that down. “No. She’s definitely not married to Happy Hogan of all people. She lives with me.” He set the glass down on the coffee table and settled into the armchair beside the sofa. “In my Dreams.” Funny how that sounded when he said it aloud.
Clint was trying not to snort at the indignation that Tony was spluttering through, “Different worlds, dude.” From what he could gather anyway. “Let it go.” It wasn’t like their relationships in the dream worlds dictated their lives after all. “Oh yeah? Like living with you to make sure you remember to sleep and eat or living with you like convincing you the bed is awesome cause there’s a hot redhead in it?”
Tony shook his head, reaching out to pour himself more of the liquor. He’d need another drink for this conversation if Pepper was married to Happy fucking Hogan. Ugh. Let it go, Tony. Let it go. He cleared his throat.
“The latter, I assure you.” He said, unable to suppress a smirk at the thought of the most beautiful woman in the world in his bed. His Dreams about that were so good. “We went to the ballet together.” He added. “In this world.”
“Yeah?” While Clint was sure he’d sleep through ballet in any world, regardless of if Natasha was one of the dancers or not (thank you Dream memories) he figured that Pepper and Tony were probably cut from a somewhat different cloth than him. “I’m assuming from that smirk on your face it’s not a Stark Industries sponsored event and was actually of the ‘let’s see if we can work towards bumpin’ uglies’ type of deal?” Clint would eventually take Tony’s venture into serious dating territory serious, he would.
After a few more inappropriate comments.
“Hey,” Tony said, completely seriously. (Though, with Tony, sometimes it was hard to tell.) “Nothing on Pepper’s body is ugly.” There may have been a hint of pride in his voice at that comment. Of course, in his Dreams, he’d explored every inch and found only perfection. He broke into something of a smirk and lifted his glass for another, quick sip. “But in the crudest, most figurative sense of the phrase? I suppose I can’t deny it.”
“You’re adorable.” Clint just laughed. “Did you come over to talk to me about girls? Oh, wow. I’m touched, dude I am.” At least Tony knew what he was getting into, and Pepper seemed like a good level headed woman. Who could actually deal with Tony and his antics. “Have you written a poem about her hair yet? Or counted her freckles? You remember there’s a line between cute and creepy, right?”
This is what best friends were for though, the teasing. “You taking her out again?”
Tony knew he was adorable. Damn it. He really had just come over to talk about girls. But what else in the world was there to talk about? Tony grinned as he lifted his glass to take a sip. “I think I might. Take her out, not write a poem.” He sipped, lowered the glass, and smirked over at Clint. “And you? How’s living with Kate?”
Knowing Tony, the Tony that Clint knew at least, a poem about anything would be terrible, since he tended to go into techno-babble mode pretty easily. Maybe dating would get Tony out of his bubble a little more too, it certainly couldn’t do any harm, that was for sure. “Good for you.” Really, even if Clint’s understanding of Tony and Pepper’s relationship in his dream world was different, so long at the idiot genius was happy.
“It’s pretty great. I mean, she stayed over more often than not anyway, making it official just saved her money on her rent and stuff.” And really, Clint sort of prefered that Kate actually lived there, rather than her just staying over all the time. They’d at least managed to mostly get through all the boxes and unpack their shit too. It was pretty cool, actually being responsible adults.
Hey, having Clint’s approval was kinda a big deal. Tony hadn’t talked to someone he trusted about this. He hadn’t talked to anyone about this, really, but to have his friend throw his weight behind it? It meant the world to him. Not that he’d admit it. That was some touchy feely, wishy washy stuff there.
Then they moved onto another touchy feely, wishy washy subject. Clint and Kate were the real deal. Tony had noticed a change in his friend when the two of them got together, and another change after they moved in. “Well, to save money,” Tony nodded, though he wasn’t convinced. “Do you ever miss your alone time?” Because Tony was convinced that he would.
“Alone time?” Clint was still in the juvenile mind department there, but he figure Tony would have caught that too, either way he knew that wasn’t what Tony meant. “Nah, I mean, she works, I work. We both have similar but mildly different social circles.” For all that Clint was cool with most of Kate’s friends, he didn’t really hang out with them, and Kate could get along fine with Clint’s friends, but wasn’t super bothered about nights out with them either. It worked out fine for them really.
“Honestly? I kinda like that I don’t need to come home to just Lucky. I mean, the goofball is awesome, but I dunno, having Kate actually stay here is pretty cool.” It was strangely domestic at times, but it was nice really, having someone around to vent about a dumb thing that happened, or laugh about some crap. Or for those exceptionally lazy mornings when no one was doing anything. “I’m pretty sure you’ll get there. And you still have your lab for your alone time, dude.”
Tony nodded. He understood perhaps a moment too late that alone time could be taken the wrong way. It wasn’t exactly how he’d meant it, but hey, that worked too. Tony almost couldn’t imagine having a woman in his house all the time. Then again he probably would have enjoyed all the sex. Then the “alone time” might not be as necessary.
“That’s the plan.” Tony lifted his glass as if in a toast, and then drained it. Cheers.