Luckily I got someone on batdial.
Who: HG Wells, Harley and ft. Kate Kane What: Stormtrooper mayhem When: 5/4 status: complete Rating :PG-13
Well things had gone crazy in Orange County again. Stormtroopers weren’t the easiest to fight given their armor and the fact they had blasters, but Helena didn’t let that deter her from fighting them. It was something she rarely got to do, and she was actually a skilled martial artist. In this life, she’d trained in taekwondo. And from her dreams, she had kenpo. But of course, using martial arts against Stormtroopers required some finesse.
But she’d taken a few guns from the arsenal Harley kept. Helena didn’t like guns, but she would use them when she needed to. And, well, against weapons like this? She needed ranged weapons. And she also needed back up, which was why she was out there with Harley on what had become a battlefield of sorts.
She took down another Stormtrooper with a well-placed shot. Their armor had weak points, something she’d picked up on quickly. And she didn’t even bat an eye about the whole killing thing.
“What do you say to moving, love? Perhaps get to higher ground where we can more easily take them out? Or would you rather cover me while I get closer to them?”
Harley had dressed to the nines, with ammo belts and bandoliers and what amounted to a stormtrooper dress. She had three grenades, and a rocket launcher hanging off of her back. “I think we need better cover than this, doll face. We don’t got da princess’s plot armor or nothin’!”
They were, after all, the extras in this story, and the extras always got killed! Harley was genre savvy enough to know they were red shirts and to act a little accordingly.
That didn’t mean she wasn’t reckless, though.
Helena wasn’t as well-dressed for the occasion. She was in her typical skinny jeans, boots and a blouse. However she’d pulled her hair into a ponytail. It never boded well for one’s hair to get in their eyes while they were trying to fight and stay alive.
She had a couple guns with her, one in her hand. She had two other handguns at each hip, then a larger rifle across her back.
“I believe you are correct,” she said and scanned the area they were in, looking for better cover. “This way, there should be something over here.” At least if it hadn’t gotten destroyed by the fighting already. Helena began heading in that direction, gun at the ready, eyes darting this way and that as she moved, trusting that Harley would be right behind her.
Popping a bubble, Harley jumped over their barrier and followed her wife. Everytime she shot at a stormtrooper, she made gun noises to complement the real gun noises she was making. “We should steal a blaster!”
“I think we should steal more than one.” Helena would love to have one for future use in these sorts of situations, and she would also love to have one that she could take apart and perhaps make a new weapon out of it. That’s when she spotted a group of stormtroopers ahead.
Silently, she signaled at them. They could get the drop on them as the troopers seemed to be focused on something else, and their backs were to them.
“Lets steal like 8, we can put ‘em up, genuine article!” Harley thought they could ebay one for a small fortune. Possibly a large fortune. She fell quiet, reaching for a gun at her hip. She hovered over a grenade instead and looked at Helena and mouthed ‘boom?’
She looked at Harley, then nodded at the mouthed ‘boom.’ That would do nicely for this. Helena wouldn’t mind selling one of the blasters just as long as she had one, or even two, that she could keep for taking apart and rebuilding purposes.
Harley threw the grenade, making a whistling sound as she did so. She made a tiny explosion with her hands when it went off, then popped up and started firing wildly. As long as she something she’d be a better shot than them!
Once the grenade went off, Helena also popped up and began firing. She fired less wildly than Harley. The explosion hadn’t neutralized all of the troopers, and it had attracted some attention from others nearby. Fire was being returned and Helena ducked down a bit. She set the gun she’d been using aside and pulled the rifle off of her back. She aimed and took out some of the troopers coming towards them.
“I think we’ve attracted some of their friends,” she commented, keeping a steady aim and firing when she had good shots.
“And me without a light saber.” Harley gestured with her hand, but nothing force-related happened. She chewed on her lip, then reached into her pack. She started to pull out a mallet, which clearly obeyed the rules of hammerspace. “Okay new plan. You cover me and I go play pinata.”
“If only we were Force-users,” Helena commented. She knew better than to say Jedi because she sure as hell knew neither of them could really fully conform to the Jedi laws. But neither were they strictly Sith. They were both in some area in between. She looked at Harley, a brief worried expression crossing her face. “I’ll cover you, but be careful, love.”
“I want a red and white alternating one.” She pecked Helena’s cheek, then lept up and darted down the street. She sent a trooper flying into a brick wall.
She returned the peck to the cheek, then she stood up again once Harley darted down the street. She provided cover, taking out a few troopers that were ready to aim at her wife. Helena was not having any of that. She wasn’t about to lose the woman she loved to some bloody stormtroopers.
Except that some of them seemed to pick up on the fact that Helena was providing cover fire for Harley’s advance. They opened fire on Helena, but thankfully they were lousy shots.
Well, all except for one.
Helena cried out, a high-pitched girly cry of pain as she was hit in the shoulder. She stumbled and fell back as pain radiated from her shoulder. “Oh god bloody fucking damn it!” She cursed through clenched teeth. She grabbed her gun again with her good arm, then did her best to get up and keep firing. However, her aim was kind of shot so she simply tried for general firing to keep the heat off of Harley.
“What?” What! Harley’s head whipped around, multi-colored pigtails bouncing. “H!” Seeing red, she darted towards the nearest trooper, hitting him with the mallet so hard his armor cracked. She swung it in a wide arc, trying to get back to her wife.
“Buggery bollocks,” she cursed some more. Seeing Harley making her way back towards her, Helena managed to shoot down a couple stormtroopers behind her before the pain got the better of her and she sunk down behind cover. It most definitely hurt. And it hurt a lot. She dropped her gun and held onto the arm of the wounded shoulder, pressing it tight against her side. “Fuck that hurts.” Helena clearly let the swearing flow freely when she was injured to this degree.
Harley skidded on her kneeguards as she reached Helena, pulling her hand aside to get a look at the wound. “Oh shit that looks bad. We gotta get you outta here.”
She fished around in her bra for her phone and pulled it out. “Luckily I got someone on batdial.”
Kate was in the middle of something when her phone rang. She tapped her mask. “Hello?”
“Hey Bat lady! I could really use a favor!”
“Harl…how did you get this number?!.” Kate kicked a Stormtrooper in the face.
“You’re in the phone book, silly. Look, my wife kinda got shot but we’re pinned down over on third. Do you think ya could come beat them up while I get her outta here?”
“I have a headache,” Kate muttered. “Give me three minutes, I’m not too far away.”
“Thanks, doll!” Harley hung up. “See? I got it handled.”
Helena was gritting her teeth hard, pain searing through her. She couldn’t quite sit still, writhing a bit as Harley made the phone call. “Thanks,” she managed to say gratefully after Harley hung up. “How many of them did you get?” She was trying to focus on anything but the pain.
“Seven,” Harley said. She popped up to shoot and keep them distracted then checked over Helena again. “This wasn’t what I meant for covering me, H. Ya can’t do this kind of think you gave me a heart attack!”
The sound of rippling fabric accompanied Batwoman as she swung down to their position. Her outfit was a little scorched in places but she didn’t seem the worse for wear. She looked at Harley dourly, before kneeling to look at Helena’s arm. “I’ll play with the Stormtroopers while you get out of here. My costume is bullet proof and the blasters are just going to leave bruises. Unlike some people I wear armor.”
Helena had to chuckle a bit. “Clearly I miscalculated the odds of them actually hitting me. I do apologize for frightening you, love.” She tried to make light of the situation for the moment, even as she inwardly hoped that she wouldn’t lose her arm. She liked her arm where it was.
When Batwoman arrived, Helena started slightly, cursing again as she jostled her injured shoulder. “Thank you. I am sorry to be such a bother, but clearly they are able to hit something once in every one hundred shots.”
Kate hesitated a moment, then handed Harley her grappling gun. “Use this, hold onto her tight. It’ll jostle like a bitch but it’ll get you out of here safely. “
Except for Helena getting hurt, this was shaping up to be the best day ever. “I always wanted ta play with one of these!”
Seeing the grappling gun brought some life back into Helena. “I invented one of those in my dreams. If only I had the bloody thing here,” she commented. She shook her head slightly. “I’m ready when you are, love.” She picked up one of the blasters there because she may be injured, but she wasn’t leaving without one of those guns to look at later.
“Can ya build one?” Harley strapped several of the blasters to her and Helena because they were thinking the same thing, then looped her arm around her and lifted up the grappling gun. “Ta infinity! And beyond!”
There was way more force involved than she’d expected and it felt like her arm was going to wrench out of her sock but it was awesome. She shrieked in delight, then helped Helena up onto the roof top. “If you weren’t hurt I’d go again.”
“Yes, I can.” And she would certainly build one. She wrapped her good arm tightly around Harley, then gritted her teeth as she held on with her injured arm. The jostling when straight to the wound in her shoulder, but she managed to bite back any cry of pain. Though she couldn’t quite keep a poker face when they got onto the roof, and it was obvious she was in pain.
“I’ll build you your own, then you certainly can play with it all you wish, love.” She’d need to get the appropriate parts, of course, but it would be rather simple to build.
“Shh. You can build all you want once we get ya looked at.” The nearest hospital was a few miles away, and Harley peered over the roof top edge. “Okay. Let me just hotwire that corvette an’ we’ll arrive in style!”