Felix Dawkins (suburbiaphobic) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2016-04-29 00:27:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, felix dawkins, joshua washington |
Who: Felix Dawkins & Josh Washington
What: Josh had another nightmare, Felix goes to comfort him
When: Backdated: Backdated: Friday, April 8th. Middle of the night
Where: Josh's Apartment
Rating/Warnings: Talk to death and FTB distractions
Status: Complete
Felix had been asleep when Josh’s first text came through, but by the time the last one caused his phone to vibrate, he was awake and on his feet, already looking for clothes to throw on. He has replied back before getting dressed and saw the response after shoving his feet into a pair of shoes, his heart breaking as he saw the words on the screen. In his dreams Josh had died. He didn’t know what it was like for someone to dream about their own death in these sorts of dreams, but he’d seen people talk about it on Valarnet before. The only thing he could think as he moved through the apartment, careful not to wake up Sarah or Kira, was that at least now Josh wouldn’t have any more dreams. No more horrible dreams would wake him up in the middle of the night like this.
He replied again before heading down to his car. More replies were exchanged at red lights or while there was no other traffic, despite Felix knowing that he shouldn’t drive and text, but if he couldn’t physically be there with Josh yet, he wanted to be there in some capacity. Finally reaching Josh’s apartment, he found a parking space and headed upstairs where he knocked on Josh’s door when he reached it.
The texts help. A lot. They let him know that Felix is on his way to come be with him, to help reassure him that this is the real world. This is the world that matters, this is where he’s living and his sisters are living and he has a best friend and a great boyfriend.
His great boyfriend who’s at the door, and Josh shoves himself off the couch to answer it. He’s a bit tipsy, courtesy of a now half empty bottle of whiskey sitting on the coffee table, and he sways in place a little. The smile he gives Felix is beyond tired, but it’s genuine.
“Hey, you came.”
“Of course I did, you numpty,” Felix stepped into the apartment and immediately wrapped his arms around Josh. It was obvious that the younger man had been drinking, but Felix would have done the same thing if he was in Josh’s shoes. Hell, Felix had never had a death dream and he’d still indulged in alcohol and drugs after a few particularly stressful dreams, “Are you alright?” He wished he could have been there when Josh had woken up from this dream, but he was there now and wasn’t planning on leaving for some time.
“I don’t -- “ Josh giggles and leans against him, arms wrapped loosely around his waist, head against his shoulder. “I don’t know what that word means.”
The question gets a shrug because no, he’s really not all right. But he can pretend to be. “I’m less than awesome. But you’re here, and that makes it better. Come lie down with me? I don’t want to sleep, but -- yeah just -- yeah.”
Felix laughed softly, “It’s sort of British for idiot. But meant affectionately of course,” Felix would hate for Josh to think that he was making fun of him or anything like that. “Sometimes I forget I’m not talking to Sarah.” He kissed Josh’s forehead before nodding, “Of course. Lead the way.” Felix knew very well where Josh’s bedroom was, but he thought it only polite to let Josh do the honors.
“I am an idiot, it’s okay,” he shrugs and tugs at Felix’s hand, dragging him towards the bedroom. There’s a brief pause where he contemplates taking the whiskey, too, but decides against it.
Back in the bedroom he crawls into bed and pulls back the covers so Felix can come curl up with him. “You’re fucking amazing, you know that?”
“Maybe, but you’re my idiot.” Felix had never been quite so sentimental about anyone he’d gone out with in the past, but Josh was different from any other guys he’d been with.
Once in Josh’s room, Felix took off his shoes and jacket then crawled into bed beside the younger man. Considering he’d been sleeping when Josh had texted him, his hair was already messy and he wore no makeup, which Felix didn’t usually let anyone see, but considering he’d spent the night at Josh’s before, it was a state Josh had seen him in before. “Anyone would come over if their boyfriend asked them to. I wouldn’t have dreamt about letting you go through this alone.”
“It’s just such bullshit like -- who the fuck saws people in half? Jesus Christ.” Josh burrows firmly against Felix’s chest, nuzzling up under his chin and kissing a little there. Because Felix tastes nice and kisses help him forget the fucking ridiculousness of his dreams.
“I saw my fucking intestines, Felix.”
As Josh nuzzled closer to Felix, he tangled their legs together and ran a hand soothingly up and down Josh’s back, “Some bloody fucking sicko, that’s who.” He couldn’t believe that Josh had had to dream about something like that. It was one thing to dream about dying, but to dream about dying like that? That had to be horrible. “But you’re alright here. Nothing is going to hurt you here.” If Felix had anything to do with it, nothing would hurt Josh.
“When you say it, when you’re holding me like this? I can believe it.” His voice sounds small, a little lost. Almost childish. “I feel so safe with you. Like nothing else matters, you know? It’s a good feeling.”
Felix hated hearing Josh sound so lost. He hated seeing him so upset and he only hoped that things could get better now, “A lot of crazy shite happens around here, but if I have anything to do about it, none of those things will hurt you.” He wanted to keep Josh safe and protected and would do anything in his power to do it. “I want you to keep feeling good and safe.”
“Best boyfriend ever,” Josh mumbles and presses a few kisses to Felix’s chest, nuzzling there contentedly. “Right like this. This makes me feel safe. You should just -- “
It’s probably too soon to ask Felix to move in right? He doesn’t want to put him off at all, because Josh can be pretty impulsive but he’s not stupid. Not usually, anyway.
“You can stay for a couple days or whatever. If you want.”
Felix smiled as he rubbed Josh’s back, “Best boyfriend ever? I could get used to the sound of that.” He moved his hand up to Josh’s chin and tipped his head back to look into his eyes, “I’ll stay as long as you want me to.” Having only recently moved into the apartment with Sarah and Kira, Felix would be conflicted if Josh were to ask him to move in, but one way or another they would likely figure something out. “Just let me know when I wear out my welcome.”
Right, like. They just officially became boyfriends instead of fucking around, and moving in is a big thing and Josh knows Felix has other people he has obligations to. As much as Josh wants to be selfish. “I don’t think you could. Especially if you keep doing that.”
Felix hands might well have healing powers. Josh pulls away just for a second to pull his shirt off and then burrows in again, so he can have Felix hands on his skin. Like it might help him -- absorb better. Or something. He’s tipsy, shut up.
“I’ll go home and grab some stuff tomorrow then. At least a week’s worth.” Felix had told Sarah about how horrible Josh’s dreams were before, so she would understand if he was going to stay at Josh’s for a few days to comfort him after this one.
Felix waited until Josh was cuddled up against him again before placing his hands on the younger man’s bare skin, fingers running along his spine, side and arm, a smirk upon his lips and he moved his head so his lips were brushing the shell of Josh’s ear, “Keep doing this, you mean?”
“Fuck,” he exhales and turns his head to try and catch Felix’s mouth. “Keep doing that and I’ll want more than just a cuddle.”
Which is fine. Sex is a good distraction from bullshit dreams and gruesome nightmares. With Felix’s hands and mouth on his body he can feel real and whole and solid and alive and he needs that.
“What? I’m not doing anything.” Felix attempted to give Josh an innocent look, but while Felix might have been a good liar when he needed to be, he did not have the sort of face that would convince Josh he wasn’t up to something. Sex was an extremely good distraction and while Felix wouldn’t push Josh if he wasn’t up to it, he knew how much it could help in certain situations.
Josh slides a thigh between Felix’s legs, slotting their hips together with a shaky exhale. Yeah, that’s just about right. Definitely a good start. “Touching me with those magic hands. Feels good.” He pushes his hand up the back of Felix’s shirt to touch back. To finish that circuit of sensation.
Felix groaned as Josh’s leg slid between his thighs, his lips moving down to Josh’s neck, “I’m not doing anything special.” As Josh’s hand slid under his own shirt, Felix’s hands slid down to the waistband of Josh’s pants before one slid down to his ass.
“If I asked you to fuck me right now would you?” It’s better than drinking on his own, and it’s definitely better than sleeping. It means he can be awake and alive and whole and okay in Felix’s hands, and that sounds pretty damned awesome to him.
“Your flat would have to be on fire for me to say no.” Felix squeezed Josh’s ass, pulling him closer, their hips pressed firmly together. As if Felix would ever say no to a request like that. “So, yes. Yes, I would. If you’re sure you’re up for it.” Of course with their hips pressed together the way they were, it was easy to tell that he was.
“Well my place is definitely not on fire. I kind of am, though.” The line is cheesy and dumb and he knows that but he doesn’t care, because he’s all about cheesy dumb lines and Felix is with him anyway. He pants out a moan as Felix’s grip on his ass tightens and he rocks their hips together. “Yeah. Yeah, totally up for it.”