Who: Booker and Elizabeth What: talking about the dreams Where: Rogue’s house When: a couple days ago Status: complete Rating: F for feels, some mild adult references.
The first thing Elizabeth did after waking up from her dream was draw Songbird. The machine or beast was fascinating and she thought it was a product of her own mind. First she drew the thing as it had appeared in the dream: crashed, broken, helpless. Then she began to draw closer pictures of its joints and what she could remember of its workings, making guesses about its composition.
She was at it for hours, missing breakfast completely and nearly missing lunch as well. When she finally realized her hunger she slid out of bed and dressed quickly, still drawing as she walked through the house toward the kitchen.
“Finally out of bed?” Booker glanced over at Elizabeth. He was sitting on the couch, flipping through netflix while reading over some old fashioned files. Yellow envelopes and all. “Was wondering if we needed to send a rescue party.”
Elizabeth giggled and sat next to Booker. “Sorry! I just had this really amazing dream last night and I wanted to get my thoughts down on paper before I lost them.” She waved her pad around a little, by way of explanation. “How has your day been?”
Booker tried to read what was on the paper but it was moving too fast. “Boring. Really boring.” But she’d said amazing dream and something like fear ran through his gut. He tried to sound normal. “What kinda dream did you have, Elizabeth?”
When he asked about her dream Elizabeth handed him the pad with the drawing of Songbird on it. “I dreamed that this crashed into my room and I fixed him! Not my room here, either, but some kind of fancy old-time library looking room.”
Face paling, Booker stared at the monster that had hunted them throughout much of Columbia. While he'd expected Elizabeth to dream, he hadn't expected it this soon, and he hadn't expected to have such a visceral reaction to Songbird. As much her jailer as he was her guardian. "Old.. timey library? Could you see outside at all?"
Elizabeth shrugged. “I only saw sky.” She picked up on Booker’s shifting expression and she sat up straighter, biting her lower lip. “It was one of the dreams like on that network, wasn’t it? A dream of another life?”
“Did .. did it feel different?” He asked, his voice wavering, as though he’d been somewhere before. “Were the brights brighter, and the darks darker, and everything just so much more real?”
Elizabeth nodded. “It was like a movie. Everything felt more real, like you said. That’s why I was so excited to draw the bird-thing.” She frowned a little, thinking back on the dream. “What does it mean? Did you dream about the same thing? Did it crash into our house?”
“Wasn’t...our house,” Booker said. He couldn’t protect her from any of this. It was going to come, it was all going to come and he knew it was worse than anything he’d been through. Just the gap alone after she’d been taken… He took a breath. “I’m not a good man in those dreams. I guess I ...try… eventually. But until then.. I ain’t a good man. I did a lot of things. Bad things. After your mama died I was in a bad place. She was the first ray of sunshine in my life and the first person to make me thing I could be a good person. But she died, and then I ended up swimming in debt. It happens like that. You look up and realize you’ve spent all your money, and it’s a sickness so you keep spending money you don’t have. It’s.. why I’ll never go to Reno or Vegas. And I couldn’t take care of you. Someone offered to pay off all my debts. And they wanted you. And I thought...great. I can get out of this hole I’m in and you could have a family that could take care of you.”
Booker exhaled, closing his eyes.”But I regretted it… immediately. And I tried to get you back, and I couldn’t and you ended up in a tower in a gilded cage in a floating city. But I wasn’t a good man and you didn’t deserve that.” And then he waited for Elizabeth to hate him.
It was a lot to take in on an empty stomach. Elizabeth looked down at her toes, curling her knees against her chest. She started to sniffle, and soon she was crying heavily, her hands hiding her face. She'd hoped that when she dreamed out would be of a happy life with normal things. Clearly neither of those hopes would come true. It seemed like her life was freakish in every universe.
“Shit. Oh shit… Liz…” Booker reached over, tentatively putting his arm around her. “It ain’t… it ain’t all bad, you know. You paint...you read. You wanted to go to Paris.” But was it really all that good, either? This story didn’t have a happy ending. Not for Comstock, not for him, not even for the Comstock in Rapture he’d dreamed of. But he’d always hoped that after that, Elizabeth would have found peace.
But wait, there was one happy thing. He knew, at least in one light house, he’d gotten to raise her. And that was something, the one something he’d held onto through all of the dreams. “A lot of it is complicated. But in the end, we do get to find peace, and maybe even happiness.”
Elizabeth snuggled against Booker when he put his arm around her. “Why is my life so stupid? I just want to be normal, just once!” She shoved her pad off the couch, her excitement turning to anger as she thought about how she’d been treated.
"Well. I wish you could be normal. But here's the thing. You're very special an' you're gonna learn just how special soon enough." He kissed the top of her head. "But you can still be normal too. I seem normal don't I? Well kinda.."
He chuckled a little, then lifted his hand. "I'm normal, but I can still do this." A flame flickered into life between his thumb and forefinger. "A gift from the dreams."
Elizabeth blinked at the fire, her head tilting as she considered it. “Is it some kind of magic? Am I going to get superpowers?” That would be a nice consolation prize, at least. She wondered how common that was among the dreamers. Probably pretty common.
“It’s called vigors. It’s something cooked up in a lab, you drink it and it gives you powers. I’m sure there’s a side effect but I don’t know what it is. So I guess it’s science more than magic.” Booker rubbed her shoulder. “You get somethin’. I ain’t sure how to describe it. Like you can open tears between worlds.”
Elizabeth thought about that for a moment, snuggling against Booker again. He was comforting, even if he wasn’t her grandfather. “That sounds interesting. Will I be able to do that here, do you think?” She made a mental note to talk to Shepard and Asami about what she’d seen. Especially Asami, who would surely take interest in the mechanical bird.
“You might. But… just remember it ain’t a toy. But I figure you’re smart enough to know that already. I don’t use the vigors that often. Sometimes.” He thought about Cerberus and Hydra, and some of the other strange and dangerous things he’d encountered. He’d almost died a dozen times, and most of those times he would have been happy to die. But then he wouldn’t have gotten to meet Elizabeth.
“I wouldn’t use it hastily,” Elizabeth said, picking up her pad again. “I’m going to get breakfast, would you like something from the kitchen?” She didn’t really want to move, but her stomach was beginning to hurt from hunger.
“Too bad I don’t have a vigor to pull something to me.” Booker could tell she was reluctant to move. “Why don’t I go get something for us both and you can sit here.”
“Then I won’t be warm anyway,” she noted. With a sigh she hauled herself up and stretched. “You can come with me, though. I hope there’s some coffee left.” Coffee was the only thing that kept her coherent most of the time.
“Sure.” Booker got up, steadfastly ignoring her drawing pad on the floor. “It’s one of them keurigs I never know how to work the damn things. Why can’t people just have an old fashioned coffee pot?”
“The Keurig isn’t so bad.” Elizabeth said cheerfully. “It’s very convenient since we all get up at different times.” She was feeling light and happy again, thanks to Booker’s comforting. She smiled at him and grabbed two mugs. “I’m thinking about working for Miss Anna at her cafe until college starts in the fall.”
“Not a bad idea. Honestly, that woman works herself to death.” Booker smiled lightly, rubbing the back of her neck. “Have a helluva time tryin’ to get her to relax most nights.”
Something in the way Booker talked about Anna tripped a circuit in Elizabeth’s brain. she frowned and looked up at Booker. “What exactly is going on between you and Miss Anna?” Her coffee finished brewing and she took a sip of her coffee.
"Huh? Nothin' is going on between me and her." At least nothing that was any of Elizabeth's business. "We're just friends." Benefits not withstanding. He made a point of not making eye contact with Liz as he tried to work the infernal coffee machine.
Elizabeth frowned a little, but he had no reason to believe Booker was lying to her. Maybe that was how friendship worked. She wasn’t sure. “She’s very pretty, I’m surprised you don’t want to date her.” Dating was still a new concept to Elizabeth but she thought it was very enjoyable.
"Well, we kinda once or twice." He shrugged his shoulder. "It's more of a friends with benefits kinda thing. We don't want emotions fuckin... screwing things up." Booker winced. He was trying to watch his language around her. He was mostly failing.
Elizabeth blinked, not sure what part of all that was more shocking. “Why? Emotions are what make us better than animals. How could you be so callous to a sweet lady like Miss Anna? How could she be so warm to me and so. . . unemotional about that sort of thing?” It just didn’t make sense to Elizabeth. Love was supposed to be the most wonderful thing two people could share, why would two reasonably sane people deny them?
Booker frowned. He didn't like the way Elizabeth was referring to it. "It ain't callous. We get along. She's one of my best friends." Booker scratched his chin. "When two people really like each other, they sometimes get really friendly and naked with each other. Friends with benefits."
“Don’t patronize me, I do have internet access,” Elizabeth huffed. “Pornography is titled friends with benefits. You must have been in love once, or was I the product of a really compelling friendship with no further emotional bond?” She didn’t realize she was shouting, but once she did she decided she didn’t want to stop. “What if Miss Anna gets pregnant?”
"I loved Annabelle." Booker looked insulted and hurt at the accusation. He folded his arms defensively. "But what I got with Rogue ain't that I don't think." But he did have a bad track record of falling for his benefit friends. "And we're safe. Even if that did happen, it's up to her what she wants to do." Booker had his own opinion on it but he wouldn't force the issue either way.
Elizabeth threw her hands up in the air, huffing a little. “You’re not setting a very good example.” It was completely incomprehensible to her.
“What kinda example do you want me to set?” He looked at her, puzzled. “Liz, the whole romantic true love thing ain’t for everyone. I lost that with your mother.”
Elizabeth chewed her lip, shaking her head. “Is that how you'd want me to carry out my affairs?” Maybe it was. She just didn't know what was going on, whether what she'd learned was true or not. Everything was mixed up and she felt a little like crying again.
“What?” Booker gave up trying to make coffee with the infernal machine before he set it on fire. He came over to Elizabeth and put his hands on her shoulders. “I want you to do right by you. What your heart and conscience tells you to do. You deserve all the happiness the world has to offer.”
Elizabeth sighed, putting her hand on Booker’s “So do you. So does Miss Anna.” She shook her head, looking down. “I’ll fix your coffee for you.” She nudged him out of the way, thinking it was best to let the subject drop for the moment. Nothing would be gained by arguing.
Booker wished he could explain it better. Explain what it was like to have a heart broken. Not just losing her mother, but he’d managed to push away or lose every other woman he’d had feelings for. Of course saying that would be admitting there were feelings, but he just didn’t want to go through the same thing with Rogue that he had with Lina. “...sorry.”
Elizabeth continued to look down while the Keurig brewed. “I’m obviously still learning. Maybe I’ll never understand the world or how it really works.” She hated being so stupid after spending so long learning so much.
"Yeah well... the same can be said for most people. I've been on this world for twice as long as you have and I still don't fully understand it or how some things work. There's a lot of...bad shit out there. But a lot of good stuff too." Booker rubbed his arms. "I hope that...If you find someone they're a good person. Otherwise I might have to kill them."
Elizabeth snorted, then giggled. “I’ll make sure to warn them, if I find them. I hope you’re fine with killing men and women. I can’t decide which I like more.”
Booker coughed. "Uh. I guess it's good to have that warnin' then. Uh." He folded his arms. He had no problem killing anyone, to be honest. "But it still stands, I don't want you hurt."
Elizabeth smiled at Booker, then hugged him. “Thank you. That means a lot to me.” All she wanted was someone to care about her. If Booker was willing she figured she didn’t need to date just yet. There would be plenty of time for that later.