Who: Raistlin Majere and Tasslehoff Burrfoot What: Moving in When: Late October Where: A ghetto fabulous apartment Warnings: one dead rat Status: Complete!
For the most part, Tasslehoff was pleased with the apartment he’d managed to find. He didn’t require a large place, but he knew that Raistlin would likely want his own bedroom, and he’d found a nice, cheap two-bedroom apartment online. Of course he’d immediately signed the two of them up, forging Raistlin’s signature on the six-month lease as a favour to his friend. Raistlin always seemed so busy and grumpy, and it felt good to do something to help him out for once.
Kitiara had been sure that the place would awful once they saw it in person, but it really wasn’t that bad. The yellowed paint was peeling and the slight odor of soggy dog permeated the room, but really all the place needed was a bit of love and elbow grease and it would definitely be great.
“Dibs on this room!” Tasslehoff said, dashing into what was clearly the bigger of the two bedrooms.
Renting out places like this had to be illegal. The paint was old and peeling off the walls. There was the distinct smell of dog that was probably a permanent part of the carpet. In between the tiles in the bathroom was mildew so thick it was probably sentient. And finally there was a very unsettling crack in the ceiling. This place didn’t need work. It needed a wrecking ball.
How Tas had managed to convince the leasing agent to let them rent the apartment when Raistlin hadn’t actually been present to sign a lease had been something of a mystery, that is, until Raistlin had actually seen the inside of the apartment. Now he was convinced the leasing agent just didn’t care. Said agent also wasn’t keen on letting Raistlin out of the lease, despite not having been there to sign it. He was stuck here for the next six months.
With Tas.
Raistlin followed Tas towards the bedrooms and frowned when he saw that he’d claimed the bigger of the two. No, that was not going to happen. “I paid the security deposit,” another thing Raistlin hadn’t been present to do, but had somehow done with Tas’s help, “I’m taking the bigger room.”
Well, if Raistlin didn’t want people to pay for things using his money, he shouldn’t just leave his wallet lying around with an easy to guess PIN number. It was common sense, really. He gave Raistlin a considering look, then looked back to the bedroom a little mournfully. This was mostly Raistlin’s new life adventure. Tas was tagging around to keep him company and to keep an eye on him. He’d promised Caramon after all. After all, who knew what kind of trouble Raistlin would get into without worldwise Tas around.
“Well, okay,” Tas sighed. “I guess I could let you have the bigger room as a favour, but you owe me.” A debt that would probably quickly be forgotten. “How does Friday sound for the housewarming party?”
One of the first things Raistlin planned on doing was getting a deadbolt for the door to the bedroom. With any luck that should keep Tasslehoff out of his things and his hands off his wallet. Not to mention privacy, something Raistlin had been short on growing up and had been looking forward to until Tas had literally invited himself to come along. Had Caramon not been standing there when Tas had shown up, suitcase in hand, Raistlin probably would have told him to go to hell. Probably.
“You’re too kind,” Raistlin grunted with a slight eye roll towards the ceiling. Oh, look at that, water damage. Tas couldn’t have picked a more ghetto place to live?
With something of a sigh, he dumped his bag in the room. At least there was a bed. A small twin sized bed, but a bed nonetheless and was better than sleeping in his car. Theoretically, that is. He was debating on whether or not he trusted the mattress when Tas mentioned a housewarming party.
“What are you talking about?” Raistlin asked over his shoulder. “What housewarming party? We’ve been here literally two days. How could you possibly know anyone to invite?”
“Thank you,” Tas said. It was always nice when people called him kind. His parents had always taught him to be kind to people, and it was nice to have it appreciated.
Tas began to explore the apartment, looking through the closets and cupboards around in case he happened across anything interesting the former tenants had left behind. “Well, I signed us for this website. I think it’s called Valarnet,” Tas said. “I think it would be a good way to meet people. And I already became close friends with the old man who was standing outside of the 7-11 down the street.” He lowered his voice into a stage whisper. “He was kind of smelly. Oh, speaking of, I got us some drinks to celebrate our new apartment!” He quickly ran over to his bag to pull out the six-pack of beer that had found its way into his knapsack, and then dashed back into the kitchen in case the old residents had left some glasses behind.
When he opened the cupboard, he didn’t find any abandoned dishes, but he did find something even more interesting. “Wow, Raistlin! Come look at this giant dead rat!”
“That guy was smelly because he was a bum,Tas,” Raistlin said with patience. “Don’t talk to smelly guys outside convenience stores.” Because the last thing he needed was for Tas to be bringing homeless people back to the apartment. “Actually, don’t talk to smelly guys at all.” Why did this need to be a ground rule?
From the doorway to his newly claimed bedroom (yes, definitely getting a deadbolt) he watched Tas root around the place. He narrowed his eyes slightly. “What do you mean you signed us up for a website? What website? And what ‘us’? There is a me and there is a you, but there is no ‘us’.”
Raistlin may have been talking to the wall the way Tas was darting about the apartment. Another sigh and Raistlin turned to go back into his room, stopped only when Tas announced he’d found a dead rat. Of course he had. Why the hell not?
“I don’t want to see your dead rat,” Raistlin said, but went into the kitchen anyway. Yup, there it was, right smack in the middle of the cupboard’s bottom shelf. This whole place was getting a goddamn scrub down before Raistlin brought any more of his stuff up from the car.
He did smirk faintly, folding his arms lightly. “Huh. Looks like your first party guest got here early,” he quipped.
“He was really friendly,” Tas said. “And he had a whole bunch of interesting stories. You shouldn’t right someone off just because they smell bad, you know,” Tas scolded.
Tas really wasn’t paying much attention as Raistlin talked to him, but he did catch the last bit. “I got us separate accounts, silly,” Tas said. He didn’t really want to share an account with Raistlin anyway. He loved him, but the other man could be kind of grumpy sometimes and Tasslehoff didn’t want him to immediately scare off new friends who might not see the heart of gold beneath Raistlin’s dismissive demeanor.
He turned away from the rat and frowned in Raistlin’s general direction. “He’s not a very good one,” Tas said. “And he’s way too early.” He began to look around for something to pick the rat up with. Finding a dead rat in the cupboard was interesting and all, but he didn’t really want to touch it.
Raistlin supposed Tas may have felt a kind of connection with the homeless man, having been a vagabond himself, so he kept his mouth shut.
Tas was the type to want to be friends with everyone, which was probably one of the reasons he got along so well with Caramon. The difference being that Caramon was at least smart enough to understand when someone didn’t want to be friends with him (as rare an occurrence as that was) and didn’t invite himself along, uninvited, on trips.
Raistlin grunted and folded his arms over his chest. He raised a brow as he watched Tas hunt around for something to pick the rat up with. He knew Tas wasn’t likely to find anything and a plastic bag was probably going to be their best option to get rid of the rat. As fate would have it, they had a couple of plastic bags containing what had been picked up at the Seven-Eleven to use as dinner that night. He wasn’t going to say anything, wanting to see how long it would be before the idea occurred to Tas.
There was something he wouldn’t keep his mouth shut about, however. “Why did you sign me up for a website?” He asked. “What makes you think I want to meet anyone? I’m not here to make friends, you know.” He already had one self-proclaimed buddy he couldn’t seem to get rid of. “I’m here to work - Wait a minute,” Raistlin narrowed his eyes accusingly at his roommate, “how did you sign us up, exactly? You were using my laptop again, weren’t you?”
It was too bad Raistlin hadn’t brought up any of his clothes yet. A t-shirt would have been great for wrapping a rat up with. “You should really make some more friends, Raist,” Tas said. “You can’t hang out with me all the time you know. I’m going to have a life outside of you.” It would probably be a blow to Raistlin. Tas knew he wasn’t that great at making friends, and without Caramon around he was probably going to get pretty lonely when Tas was out and about. But he’d do his best to make that easier for him.
“You just left it out,” in a laptop case, buried at the bottom of a suitcase, “so I thought it would be okay. You don’t mind, do you?”
Another patient sigh and subtle eye roll. Oh no, Tas was planning on having a life of his own. Whatever will he do? “I’m sure I’ll find a way to survive,” Raistlin answered. People didn’t like him as a general rule, which was fine, Raistlin didn’t much care for them either. He figured Tas would have caught on to that by now. Then again this was Tasslehoff, son of a commune and brought up with Peace, Love, Understanding and all that new age hippie shit. Which apparently also included a persistent habit of using other people’s stuff mostly (usually) without asking first.
Knowing Tas had been in his suitcase made Raistlin’s eye twitch. “Alright, since we’re stu-” Be nice, Raist. Another grunt. “...going to be living together for a while, there are going to be a couple of rules. First and foremost: stay out of my stuff. None of this ‘but I found it laying around’ excuse, alright? If it’s in my room, consider it off limits. That includes my laptop. I’m going to need that for work. And my wallet. And my phone. Unless you’re dying or the apartment is on fire.” Which may have been an improvement, actually. “Alright, Tas? Promise me.”
With that out in the air, Raistlin’s shoulders relaxed and he unfolded his arms to put his hands in his pockets. And in a quieter and moderately more gentle tone, “Use one of the plastic bags, would you?”
Tas frowned. He always kept his promises (well, usually kept his promises), but it seemed a little unfair that Raistlin wouldn’t let Tas use his things when Tas was always happy to let Raistlin use his stuff. Still, Raistlin had only specified when things were in his room. “Okay, I promise,” Tas said, sounding a little pouty.
“Oh! You always have such good ideas, Raist,” Tas said, grabbing one of the bags. He made a face as he grabbed the rat through the plastic bag, and pulled it into it.
Only Tas could make promising not to use another person’s belongings without asking sound as though it was the most unfair thing in the world. Raistlin should not have felt bad for telling him not to use his computer. Maybe he could find something else to occupy Tas’s attention, a tablet or something, so that his laptop wouldn’t be quite so tempting.
“Yeah,” he deadpanned as Tas grabbed one of the bags, “I’m a genius.” He did have to keep from laughing at the face Tas was making as he pulled the rat out of the cupboard. “It’s just a rat, Tas,” and maybe he was grinning just a little bit. “It’s dead. It’s not going to bite you.”
“No, but it’s kinda gross,” Tas said. At least it hadn’t started to smell. “I guess this means we’ll have to scrub the cupboards before we put our dishes in there though,” he giggled. He tied the bag closed and placed it on the counter, and then grabbed the beers. “Here you go, Raist,” he said, offering one to his roommate. “What were you thinking for decorations? I’ve got a whole bunch of maps that I think would look great in the living room here.” And a bunch more for his bedroom. Tas’ map collection was unnecessarily large for a vagabond like himself.
The apartment was getting a deep cleaning before any of their stuff was brought up, not just the dishes. At this point, as he eyed the bag full of dead rat on the counter, Raistlin was seriously considering maybe just spending the night in his car. He had a few days before his job actually started, days he’d originally planned to use to orient himself to his new surroundings. Now, though, it seemed as though his time would be better used making this place liveable for the two of them.
He accepted the beer Tas handed him (no need to ask where Tas had gotten it, Raistlin was pretty sure there was no receipt for the six pack that had found its way into Tas’s backpack). He moved his eyes from the rat bag towards the rest of the place. “Anything would be better than cracked peeling paint,” he said as he opened the beer. Tas’s maps weren’t bad. Inaccurate, maybe, but not bad. He shrugged his narrow shoulders. “I hadn’t thought of it. Whatever you want, I guess.” Raistlin realized how dangerous that was to say even as he said it. “Within reason,” he amended quickly.
Tas’ face lit up at the prospect of getting to decorate their apartment himself. Luckily for Raistlin, apart from his posters, Tas didn’t have a whole lot of stuff. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t acquire some nice decorations while he was out and about. ‘Within reason’ was such a vague statement that Tas promptly forgot that Raistlin had said it. “You won’t be disappointed, Raist,” Tas said cheerfully. “Just you wait! I’ll make this an apartment you can be proud to call home!” It was possible that maybe Raistlin didn’t like the apartment as much as Tas did, but Tas was determined to show that living with him would be never ending fun.