Jemma Simmons is a terrible liar (needanewplan) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2015-10-28 09:51:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, cosima niehaus, jemma simmons |
Who: Cosima and Jemma
What: Jemma receives a most unwelcome gift and Cosima learns much more about the dangers from Jemma’s dreams
When: Early morning 27 October into late morning 28 October
Where: Jemma’s flat
Warnings: Low
Status: Log | Complete
Everything was coming to head it seemed. At least, in a noticeable way. Most of the things in life were building towards something. Organisations falling and being infiltrated, double agents, a new (old?) race of people with powers who apparently wanted a war with SHIELD, emotions were running high and even as things had seemed to calm down, there was always a looming threat, what remained out in the world.
And that was when it happened. Jemma had been putting things away for the day, Fitz had asked her on a date and then went to find a restaurant when she noticed the door to the monolith open. And just like that, she was sucked into complete blackness and Jemma woke up with a gasp.
Hand fluttering to her chest, the biochemist sat up and turned on the light. 4 am and her heart was racing. She was trying to process everything that happened. Such as her apparent sudden romantic feelings for Fitz? Though maybe that was more just fear and grasping desperately and wanting to try? It was hard to say, the stakes were always so high in her dreams that who could know unless they tried. Then of course was the guilt over what had happened to Bobbi. She had told Fitz (and Cosima here) that whatever the next horrible thing Ward did would be on her because she had failed to kill him. And what was that horrible thing he had done? Having Kara kidnap Bobbi, torture her and then set her up to see someone die only for her to take the bullet and having to be the one to do the surgeries and doctoring.
Let alone everything that happened with Skye’s father, with the Inhumans, a near war and destruction. And then of course, the ever lingering question of what happened to her? Because they didn’t know anything about the monolith. Just that it scared the Inhumans apparently. That it was something Hydra had been after, that SHIELD had and had thus sucked her into it.
“Tea. Tea would be good.” Because once again, she knew that she wouldn’t be getting back to sleep. Not after the series of events she had dreamt and she was supposed to be meeting up with Cosima later that day to do work on a potential cure for the mystery clone illness. Or at least something that would help prolong the effects of the bone marrow so that they could continue their search for answers. Which meant that she needed to be alert and not half drained because she’d woken up far too early.
As she made her way to the kitchen, something caught her attention. At first she had hoped it was just her imagination, a figment from her exhausted mind that was beginning to crack from the strain.
The monolith in the glass container. Which just made her breath hitch.
“No no no no no….”
Yet she made a step towards it. She was going to need to alert the Director. But she needed to make sure it would be safe to transport and that’s when it happened. Once more it liquified and rushed out of the container as if a tidal wave, engulfing her as she grasped desperately at the floor, nail marks following her path as she screamed and then was silenced as she felt herself fall into the darkness.
As much as Cosima had enjoyed her dreams slowing in frequency, it left her frustrated because she still had no answer as to how to treat her illness long term. She at least had the book with the key to Duncan’s code in it, but even that was proving difficult to figure out. Cosima didn’t have enough of the pieces to really translate it. But she tried to focus on keeping herself alive and getting through this. She’d at least felt good since the bone marrow transplant. Her symptoms had backed off, so they had some time.
Cosima was also worried about Jemma. After learning about Ward and what Jemma had said then, it had become more than obvious that Jemma was keeping a lot of those feelings pent up inside. So she was going to do whatever she could to help Jemma let it out and deal with it. Because Cosima wasn’t a terrible girlfriend, and she wasn’t about to just ignore the fact that Jemma wasn’t completely okay, despite what she may say.
When they were supposed to meet up, Cosima wasn’t initially worried. They were both scientists, so Cosima at first simply thought perhaps Jemma had gotten caught up in work and lost track of time. It wouldn’t be the first time such a thing occurred. However, after a half hour of waiting, Cosima called Jemma but only got her voicemail. She left one, and continued waiting for another hour, ending that waiting period with another phone call which also went unanswered. She went back to her place, eventually sending a couple unanswered texts and making another call to Jemma over the course of the next hour or two. At that point, she decided to simply go over to Jemma’s and see if she was alright, or if something had happened to her.
After all, this was Orange County, crazy shit happened here. Normal crime was also a thing, so Cosima headed over to Jemma’s apartment to check it out. Using her key to get in, she gave a knock as she opened the door and peered around it.
“Jemma? Are you here?” She asked as she stepped inside and closed the door behind her. “I was getting worried when you didn’t show up and didn’t answer your phone. I mean, you probably just got busy with work and you might just be in the shower right now or something, but-” Cosima stopped mid-sentence when she saw the monolith in the glass container.
“Holy shit!” Cosima’s jaw dropped, as did her purse and the keys in her hands. The landed on the floor with a thud and a clatter. “Jemma?” She asked, far more insistent this time. Whatever that monolith was, she had a bad feeling about it. And that’s when she looked down and noticed the nail marks. She moved over to them and knelt down, inspecting them. The marks started in the middle of the floor and trailed all the way to the monolith.
“Shit! Jemma!” She called out as she stood up, fear gripping her. Whatever that monolith was, it had seemingly sucked Jemma into it. At least she was going to assume it was Jemma and not someone else. Her eyes went wide and she walked towards the monolith. Even though she was terrified, all she knew was that if Jemma was in there, she was damn well going to get her out somehow.
Having been dragged into the monolith, Jemma felt like she was in limbo. Was limbo even a place? It shouldn’t be but she had learned that things that shouldn’t be didn’t necessarily mean they weren’t. She could feel herself running, constantly running. Time seemed irrelevant. But it wasn’t a thing she was running from, it was herself. Everything she pushed aside, everything she said didn’t matter because there was always some other crisis to deal with.
Jumping out of the plane to save the team when she was infected.
Failing to save everyone.
Ward’s betrayal.
The med pod at the bottom of the ocean. God it was like she was drowning, perhaps she had been drowning all along and never realised it. Every attempt to break the surface failed because she was pushed back into the water.
Realising she was making Fitz worse and leaving, being away from her team.
Being undercover at Hydra. The constant fear. Fear of death. Fear of brainwashing. Fear of failing.
Returning. Being estranged from Fitz, from everyone and no one understanding why. No, the others understood, just not Fitz. Who was her best friend. Who was so important to her…
Trip dying. God Trip dying and being unable to save him. Failing him. She felt responsible and there was death. Not just his but her team’s. Raina… Skye and how Fitz didn’t trust her anymore because she took a scientific approach because it was all she had left. She was trying to help.
More betrayals.
Failing to kill Ward.
The war between Inhumans and SHIELD. Thinking there was a break and then...
Desperation. So much desperation. Everywhere she turned, it was another reminder, another barrage of emotion. Gasping for air, she hid before she felt some sort of shift. Something in the air, ground? Jemma wasn’t sure but suddenly she was all but spit out of the monolith, eyes squinting as she readjusted to the light, breathing ragged.
“Cosima. Hello, did I miss our meeting?”
And even exhausted, she was still polite. Except that she was also in shock and promptly passed out.
Of course, Cosima had made attempts to poke at the monolith and tried to piece together what had happened. She didn’t sleep, she just tried to figure out what had happened and what had seemed to trigger the monolith pulling Jemma into it. Because that’s what the evidence said, and Cosima was sticking to using science and logical thinking in that respect because she couldn’t freak out. She couldn’t let herself breakdown over Jemma being gone because clearly Jemma needed her help. And Cosima wasn’t going to simply leave Jemma wherever she was.
Was she trapped inside the monolith in suspended animation? Or was there something far worse going on? She didn’t know, and after poking at it herself for a while, she did make a post on the Valar network pondering this situation.
Regardless of anything else, Cosima was bound and determined to not lose Jemma. Thus she tried everything she could think of and had the equipment available to do things with to try and see if the monolith would react or open or pull her in or something. But no matter what she did, nothing worked. The monolith remained stoic and nothing other than a slab of rock inside a glass case.
Cosima had sat down on the floor with notes and various instruments (which happened to include some silverware because clearly poking at it with a knife or fork would do something) scattered around her, she’d nearly fallen asleep sitting upright, her head propped in her hand. She was half asleep when she heard something, or perhaps moreso felt something like something coming out of the monolith. Eyes snapping open, she saw Jemma was back and she just stared at her a moment.
“Jemma,” she said in slight shock just as Jemma passed out. “Shit, Jemma!” Cosima shoved things off her lap and quickly moved to Jemma’s side. Before picking her up, she first checked for any sign of injury. After all, moving her could make an injury worse, but when she didn’t see any sign of that, she gently shifted her and held her. Cosima took Jemma’s pulse as well as assessed her physical state. Her first instinct was to get her to a hospital, more specifically to Martha at the Agency. But first was to assess Jemma’s physical state.
All outwardly signs showed no serious physical injury. She was covered in dust and grime, seeming almost as if she’d had intense exposure to the elements, dehydrated. Her pulse was erratic though slowly starting to slow to a more normal pace as the minutes ticked by. All things considered, a trip to the Agency and Martha might be necessary once she was up. Especially since the monolith would need to be taken in as well for studying.
Inside her mind though was a different story. Jemma was no longer running from her past, from the things she had kept buried inside her mind to focus on anything and everything other than her own traumas. She was just sitting there with Trip.
“C’mon, girl, you can’t hold out on me like this.”
“I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.”
Seeing Trip grin at her, Jemma felt an ache, knowing this was just an illusion, Trip wasn’t in Orange County. And he was dead in her dreams. She was able to note these things even now. A sign of rationality, the rationality which always won over her emotional well being because it was what she knew.
“Your girl who wants you to wake up.”
“Cosima…”
It was enough to startle her half way, only for Trip to suddenly turn to ash once again and shatter in front of her eyes.
“No!”
Gasping awake and upright, Jemma nearly punched Cosima in a reflex she didn’t know she had, squinting as she attempted to readjust to the light. Even the one word showed signs of wear on her voice, it was raw from lack of water, breathing heavy as she shook and looked around to reacquaint herself with her surroundings, even as any actual memory of where she’d been seemed lost to her, only the memories of her running from herself and the memories that haunted her.
Keeping tabs on the pulse, Cosima didn’t like how erratic it was, but she could tell it was gradually slowing back to a more normal pace. That was a good sign, but there definitely was reason to get Jemma to Martha and the Agency. But first she needed Jemma to wake up.
The signs she saw on Jemma were definitely odd. It seemed as though Jemma had been in the desert for an extended amount of time. Dehydration was undoubtedly a factor currently. Which only solidified getting her to Martha so she could get IVs and proper medical attention as needed.
Cosima started a bit when Jemma suddenly woke up. She could hear the wear and tear in her voice and she frowned slightly, wondering what exactly had happened inside that monolith. But that wasn’t what she was going to ask about first. That would come later.
“It’s alright, Jemma, you’re in your apartment,” Cosima said as Jemma was looking around. “Do you want some water?” She made the offer first, deciding to let Jemma try and adjust to the surroundings before pulling the ‘let’s go the Agency!’ or for trying to hug her. Really, Cosima was just glad that Jemma was back, and she relieved. Though of course there was a whole new set of worries beginning to set in.
Such as, just what had happened to Jemma?
If only Jemma knew what had happened to her in the monolith. It was all a blur, really. Well at least the actual events and not the running from everything she continued to suppress. But those wouldn’t lead to the symptoms she was exhibiting. It was too bright and she shielded her eyes as attempts to adjust to the light failed, jolting slightly as she heard Cosima’s voice. It wasn’t even that she was speaking loudly it was just everything was loud.
Water. Yes. Water.
“Yes please…”
She was confused. Very confused. Her mind was trying to make sense of what had happened, but this was something she couldn’t do that with. No matter how good at compartmentalising she was, this wasn’t something Jemma could make sense of or process. Not yet.
Instinct and reflex said start being a scientist. Put her clothing into evidence bags to examine the dust and anything she might have picked up...wherever she was. Contact the Agency and have the Monolith taken away to be studied in a controlled environment. But she was feeling drained. Perhaps once her voice didn’t feel so raw and painful when she spoke she would start that. For now it was staying as she was.
Really, this was not what she expected to have happened. Though Cosima well knew in Orange County, almost anything seemed to happen regardless of any intentions on the matter. So she looked Jemma over again, finding herself only more perplexed by what had happened to her girlfriend. She noted it seemed Jemma was having sensory overload, which she would address shortly.
But first, water. She got up and retrieved a bottle of water from the fridge, being careful to close the fridge door quietly, then she opened the bottle and went back over to Jemma, handing it to her.
“Do you want me to turn the lights out?” She asked softly. “Or just turn the ones off in here, leave a lamp on in another room as a guide light? Might be easier on your eyes,” she said. Though as a scientist, Jemma would know that’s what Cosima meant. Because she was just trying to figure out the best way to help Jemma calm down and not be so jarred from her senses being overloaded.
There were a lot of distractions. It was unnerving but as she held the bottle in hand, it acted as a sort of anchor. It didn’t help the sounds or the light but it was grounding which was definitely a necessity in that moment, her thoughts slowing ever so slightly. She knew where she was. She knew the Monolith was a threat.
Much like Cosima, and really it being her default, Jemma went straight to science.
“Perhaps. I need to alert the Agency about transport. I also need to put my clothing into a blue evidence bag.” B is for Blue is for Biological after all. And because that was her driving thought at the moment, Jemma pushed herself up as she took a sip of water, swaying and feeling weak but pushed through it. There were things she needed to do. Ensure the Monolith didn’t react again. Alert the proper authorities. Gather all evidence she could.
She couldn’t even make sense of what had had happened. So science mode it was.
Internally on an emotional level, Cosima had been through the gambit the past...day? Honestly, she’d lost track of time several hours ago. But on the outside, she was trying to stay in the scientist mode, try to figure out what happened and do what she could to help Jemma. The emotional side of things could come out later, she figured.
“Do you want me to call Martha? I can do that while you change?” Martha was someone she felt comfortable calling, at least. The woman was sort of her doctor at the moment.
When Jemma got up, Cosima was ready to move and catch her if she needed it, but she refrained herself as her girlfriend managed to keep her feet.
Usually Jemma would deny such a request. But the fact remained that she needed to know what happened to her. She needed the science and if she was to be part of the evidence in dealing with the monolith, then so be it. It was a detached way of thinking and while Cosima undoubtedly wanted her to be checked out for her physical well being, Jemma needed to know the science.
“Yes. That might be a good idea.” Her voice was distant, as if she wasn’t quite sure of herself. But she could hold onto science. “I’ll get changed and alert the Director, then we can go.”
It would be better to get a full work up at the Agency anyway. Jemma knew that. It would also be easier for her to access the files later. Staying focused on the science grounded her. And while Jemma knew that the days of not talking about her dreams were probably at an end (at least for the time being), she didn’t have the answers and that was just frustrating.
Shaking the thoughts from her mind, the biochemist made her way to the bedroom to change while Cosima called Martha. She then alerted the Agency about the Monolith and the need for transport. One step at a time. She could do this, it was just a process.