Naomi (keepsorder) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2015-02-28 18:28:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, naomi |
Who: Naomi (Narrative)
When: February 27
Where: Her Office
What: Minor Emotions
Rating/Warnings: Low
Status: Complete!
The faint tap, tap, tap of her pen broke the silence in measured intervals, almost too precise to seem unintentional. It was not the kind of anxious tapping that marked a nervous individual’s struggle to keep still, but rather a kind of stillness in itself, the only sound out of place in the otherwise quiet office, timed nearly perfectly with her breathing.
Naomi Abbott was not possessed of a nervous disposition. She once might have been, bubbly and bright, kind. That was a long time ago, and she was no longer a child. No. She was not a nervous sort. She was precision and strength. Everything she did seemed to have a purpose, a carefully thought out place in her world. Every movement seemed practiced. And it had been. So much so it had become reflex, as easy as breathing, to move with such exactness, not show what she was thinking or feeling. It only really slipped when her emotions got the better of her, usually her anger, always lurking so close to the surface.
Today, it isn’t anger she’s fighting so desperately to control. An entirely different emotion had inspired the slow, even tapping she was using to steady her rapidly growing agitation. Her face remained an entirely unreadable mask.
Seconds passed, minutes, and then very slowly her gaze dropped, landing on a calendar that sat on her otherwise mostly empty desk. Her hand faltered, then stilled. She released a long breath she didn’t remember holding, much too loud to her own ears. The dull throbbing at her temples was getting worse, quickly becoming more than just an annoyance.
It had been nearly ten years now. She didn’t know why the date stood out so well in her mind; from her perspective, he had abandoned them long before that. But it was a date she couldn’t forget, and it was fast approaching.
Ten years. That was a big anniversary, wasn’t it? There had been dozens of news articles the first year, a handful after the fifth, dozens more a little before the seventh drew to a close. She wondered if there would be more this year. She hoped there wouldn’t be any.
It wasn’t that she hadn’t loved her father. She had. His disappearance should have left a hole in her life. But the reality was, it had made little difference because as far as she was concerned, he was already gone.
Still, she felt...something. Pain. As if reacting to her own thoughts, she winced, closing her eyes tightly as she let her head fall into her hands, her elbows braced painfully on her desk.
If her assistant chose this moment to enter, so help her. If there was one thing she hated more than feeling vulnerable it was having someone know she was feeling vulnerable. She might not have wanted the power she’d been handed in taking over her father’s company, but having that power undermined was something she couldn’t afford.
Finally, she pulled herself upright, straightening in her chair as she gently cleared her throat, almost visibly pushing whatever she was feeling aside. There would be time for that later. Right now, she had work to do.