ʀᴏɢᴜᴇ has a (dangerous_touch) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2014-10-20 19:57:00 |
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Rogue sighed and headed to go see her mother. She felt miserable, and she’d been the one to break it off. He kept saying she put him in a relationship without his permission but he hadn’t said no, no no and pushed away. But still, it’d been doomed since that conversation and she hated it. Hated herself for it. Because here she was, following in her dreams’ footsteps. Over and over again. Oh Rogue hadn’t entirely minded the harmless flirting, it was the hands on flirting that made her nervous. The trip to Vegas had almost broken her with the women going with. She couldn’t deal with it so she broke it off. And now she was standing waiting for her mother to let her in, hugging her hips with her hands, nails digging in. She had gloves on, powers were coming back and it was safer to just not touch people. Rogue never looked so downtrodden as she did now. Raven opened the door, still clad in her blonde persona, though she dropped it once she’d closed the door behind Rogue. She still looked young, ageless even, but she was more comfortable that way. Not comfortable enough to show that face in public, but still comfortable. And if it kept certain people from hunting her down, so much the better. “Coffee is brewing and there’s ice cream in the fridge.” She smiled at Rogue, the expression without the typical dream scheming. This was a relationship she was trying to repair before it got damaged. One thing she knew about Rogue that she figured carried over was that the other woman craved a real relationship. And Raven? Had never pegged Remy for being able to stay monogamous. Rogue smiled at her and slipped inside. She made her way to the kitchen to get herself a coffee and a bowl of ice cream. She needed it. She wasn't used to seeing her drop faces so easily. But she smiled faintly at her mother. She brushed hair behind her ears. "Thank you. Coffee good." She looked at her quietly. She craved it like a junkie craved the next fix. She wasn't sure how that came about. Must have been the dreams. She'd never thought of it before then. “It’s a little sweet. I don’t take coffee as black as I used to,” she explained, handing her a mug, then taking a seat at the dining table. Her apartment was modest - much more so than she was used to, but she was barely making ends meet now, so it had to do. “Want to talk about it?” She took the coffee and tucked her legs up under her in the chair as she slumped into it. "Sweet is good." She pushed hair out of her eyes. "I'm an idiot, aren't I?" “You said it, not me,” Raven retorted, rolling her eyes. “I’m trying not to say I told you so. How did he take it?” "Said I put him in a relationship without his permission then I was breaking up with him, with question marks. Like he was offended or something. Then he asked if I was going to Starks party with him still." She rolled her eyes and sipped her coffee. "It was... like oh ok and move on." “He doesn’t care about you.” Raven nearly spat the words out. “Even in the dreams, he leads you on and leads you on and takes advantage of you! What kind of man leads a woman on like that?” Rogue looked over her mug at her mother, lips twisted into a little frown. "But I'm the one who leaves. Guess as much as i try, it's like fate that what happened there happens here, at least in regards to him." She Looked down into thecoffee. “You leave because you come to your senses,” she pointed out, helpfully. “And for all that he leads you on he’s frightfully codependent. And so are you, on him. It’s unhealthy.” She looked up at her. "Yeah I guess we are a little." A lot. Really a lot. She leaned back to look at her mother. "I'm tired of not being treasured for who I am. Powers or not." Raven felt suddenly emotional. She’d hug Rogue, except she thought that might put her off. “You’re a wonderful person. You shouldn’t let yourself be defined by a relationship or lack thereof.” Rogue put on a smile. “Yeah, I know. Still sucks, though. I was hoping it’d be different this time. Something would have changed. I don’t know. Stupid hopes get me hurt in the end, though.” she polished off her coffee. “Guess… guess it doesn’t matter.” “The heart is often a cruel motherfucker,” Raven proclaimed. “And it matters, because you’re hurting. But you’ll get over it.” Getting over it was easier said than done. Raven had tried to move on from Irene, but she’d died and they’d spent fifty years together, so that was a little different then a few months with a man that she considered to be a cheating womanizing asshole. Tell us how you really feel, Raven. “yeah I’m getting it. Jerk.” she laughed softly “Yeah I know. I’ll get past it. I’m a tough cookie, even here. And I won’t be tricked into falling into the same pattern. I just… can’t handle being stepped on, or trying to handle that kind of bullshit.” “I’d tell you to find someone to fool around with but knowing you you’ll get attached.” She rolled her eyes, and then started spooning out ice cream. “Have you considered women?” She pondered throwing something at her mother for that comment then gave her a look instead. “I’ll get attached huh?” she sniffed as if it offended her. But you know, Raven was probably right. Damn it. “They tried to bribe me over with cookies.” she smirked, recalling that convo with the group. “But no? not really? And even if I did, who says I wouldn’t get attached there either?” “They’re ten percent less likely to screw you over,” she promised. “But it’ll hurt ten times more, so maybe that’s not the best idea.” She smiled a bit and shook her head. "I think I'll just skip it all and give up on worrying about it. Honestly, I just get screwed over either way." A slender smile curled her lips, thin and tired. “Not even in the fun way.” Raven got up, then, and walked around to give something unexpected to Rogue. A hug. Rogue blinked for a moment then rested against her and returned the hug. It wasn't unwanted, just unexpected. A small smile settled on her lips. Maybe something would work out better here. |