InsaneJournal

Who: Athos and D’Artagnan
Where: Their hotel room
When After their house becomes unsafe
What Insomnia
Status: Complete
Rating: Low/None



D’Artagnan wasn’t able to sleep in the hotel. The first couple nights he was again lying awake while Athos slept. He wanted him to rest, he knew he needed it after the injury and hospital. D’Artagnan kept an eye on him through those first couple of nights even though he insisted he was fine. Now however, he was feeling the effect of his long nights. He was stressed and his nerves were shot. He was damn near the point of taking the medication he dreaded, but morning was nearing anyway.

He stood at the window of the hotel room looking out at the dark sky. It was still difficult for him to grasp that this had really happened. He was nearly in a state of shock, or so it felt like. He looked over his shoulder to make sure Athos was still there. He found himself doing that often, making sure he was near by, double checking that things were in places they were meant to be, but nothing was. This was a hotel. It wasn’t theirs, nothing was the same and it was as though for a moment he couldn’t even breathe. It hit him like a sack of bricks that Athos’ place was really gone. There wouldn’t be any magical wake up to find it’d all been just a nightmare.

Athos knew D’Artagnan was still struggling with the loss of their house but was at a loss about what to do, he’d been more knocked for six by the explosion and his injuries than he wanted to admit and as such hadn’t been on the ball.

Stirring when he realised D’Artagnan wasn’t in bed he rolled over and saw him standing by the window, getting up he moved up behind him and wrapped his arms around the younger man. “You alright love? Still can’t sleep?” he asked concern evident in his voice as he squeezed his boyfriend to him.

He knew Athos was off compare to the usual way he acted, but he just wanted him to rest anyway. He didn’t wake him, he rarely did despite Athos wanting him to. He always felt bad about the idea of it. Plus Athos needed rest. He knew he did. He knew the man would say he was fine even if he wasn’t, and so D’Artagnan attempted to copy him. It just didn’t work so well.

“I’m fine. Just not tired.” He didn’t deal with loss well in general. “Didn’t mean to wake you.” D’Artagnan frowned as he felt the warmth of his arms. “How are you feeling? Need anymore painkillers or anything?”

Athos didn't want D'Artagnan to copy him, he wanted to know when things were wrong and how he could help. His protective streak with D'Artagnan was pretty damn high, he wanted to look after him and love him and he wanted the other man to know and feel loved.

The insomnia had been getting better which meant it was this place and Athos knew he'd need to find them somewhere soon. "You didn't wake me" he said kissing his shoulder, "I'm okay, no painkillers required" he held out his wrist as proof before placing it back around D'Artagnan. "I'll find us a new home D'Artagnan I promise"

“You’re sure?” Just as Athos worried about him, he too worried. It’d terrified him to receive that message from the hospital. He knew with their jobs those types of messages were a possibility, but he still hated it.

“I did a little..Sorry, I couldn’t stay still.” He admitted with a worried furrow of his brow. His eyes carefully watching to make sure Athos didn’t hurt his wrist in those simple movements, so far he seemed all right..”I know..I guess I just realized it’s actually gone.” The insomnia had been getting better, but his nerves were too high strung to sleep in that hotel. “I couldn’t breathe.”

It was taking some getting used to, Athos was used to being the worrier not somebody who was worried about but it was nice having somebody who cared that much about you. It just increased his feelings for D’Artagnan. He knew his boyfriend hadn’t liked the message that he was in the hospital but overall he’d been dealing with it well.

“I’m sorry. If I could fix it all I would” Athos told him, “We’ll make sure our new home is as ‘strange occurrence proof’ as possible. Until then just try to think of this like an adventure, like when we went to San Francisco. Try not to let your mind dwell on it D’Artagnan” but his tone was soft and gentle because he knew it was much easier said than done.

D’Artagnan tried to make sure Athos had everything within reach that he needed. He tried to make things easier on the man while he recovered. The last thing he wanted him to do was be as stressed out as he was and still try to heal properly. He knew that didn’t work out well. Of course he was going to worry about Athos, he loved him. The thought of anything happening to him terrified him.

“It happens every time I think about it. I haven’t even seen it yet, but I don’t think I want to..” He still hadn’t dared to turn on the news or go home to see the damage. He sighed and leaned gently into his embrace. “It’s hard.” He worried almost non stop about many things now, and it was starting to show on his face. “And this time no soundtrack of Aramis and Porthos next store. “ He did grin a little bit at that, “I’ve been thinking I might try those sleep aids.” He said with a bit of disdain.

It had been noticed by Athos just how well he was being looked after and although he didn’t want D’Artagnan to fuss he allowed him to do so since it seemed to make him feel a little better about everything. He was still keeping an eye on him though.

“I don’t think you should see it. There’s no need to love” Athos advised him, enjoying the feel of D’Artagnan leaning against him. “We need to relax you” he said using his good hand to stroke over D’Artagnan’s heart before chuckling, “That is definitely a bonus here. It’s just us, no noisy neighbours so far” His hand continuing to rub absently over his boyfriends chest, “It might be a good idea. You need rest and it’ll only be for a little while. I’ll be with you, I’ll make sure you can wake up”

It was late, basically all he wanted to do was be in Athos’s arms. His eyebrow raised at the suggestion while he was so affectionately calmed. He was easy when it came to Athos, or the other man just knew exactly all his soft spots. Even those simple motions were enough to soothe his frayed nerves. “I could think of a few ways that could happen.” He teased, but really he didn’t know he was in the mood for anything too sexual at the moment. Just the snuggling seemed to help.

A sigh escaped him as he looked out at the view of the night sky beyond the large window. “How is it you’re so calm?” Most situations, D’Artagnan could handle but when it came to the house it was especially sensitive given his past. The homeless issue hit him hard since he spent most of his childhood trying to fight his own homelessness. “I’m still afraid of them..but maybe if you’re here it’s okay.” He commented about the sleep aids, he really wasn’t fond of the idea. Not being able to wake up scared him.

Athos smiled, “No naughty thoughts right now” he teased back, he’d been thinking just that they should snuggle together and maybe get D’Artagnan a nice hot decaffeinated drink. He wasn’t in any state for anything sexual right now and he thought D’Artagnan needed comfort more than anything else.

“Well I have you and I know that soon we will have our home. That helps me” Athos told him, while he was more upset than he let on about his place he knew that there was nothing to be done. Athos didn’t have the bad associations D’Artagnan did regarding a loss of home. “I’ll always be here. You don’t have to be afraid” he promised, kissing his cheek.

He nodded at that and toyed gently with Athos’ fingers of his good hand. He was too worried to touch the injured one. He didn’t want to make it worse. “I think I saw tea in one of the bags Aramis brought over.” They were stocked up on food items now from Aramis and Porhos a least. Arams had done well with that call, having the option for home cooked food was good when neither of them felt a need or want to go out.

D’Artagnan couldn’t help but smile a bit at the idea of their own home. Maybe it wasn’t so scary after all. “I’ll make us tea. I think I can manage not to burn that.” His smile only widened more at Athos’ comment and reluctantly slid away from his arms to dig for the tea bags he saw. It didn’t take long before he located them and water was being heated. He took Athos’s good hand with his own affectionately. “ You know, I think there is a hot tub here. When you feel ready for it it might help any soreness.” Despite Athos insisting he was fine, D’Artagnan was still going to worry about him. He loved him, and there was going to be no talking him out of it.

The injured hand wasn’t too bad, it throbbed a lot when he hadn’t taken enough painkillers but in that regard he was like D’Artagnan, he didn’t like using medication too much. He wanted to be able to feel his hand otherwise he wouldn’t know when it was healing or if he accidentally damaged it again. He nodded at D’Artagnan’s suggestion, feeling warm at how in sync they were.

Porthos and Aramis’ delivery of supplies had been welcomed and accepted with many thanks. They really were two of the best friends anybody could hope for. “You make tea better than I do and you know it” Athos told him affectionately staying close as D’Artagnan prepared the tea things. “I didn’t know that. Sounds good, if we can grab it some night when nobody else is around” If Athos was going to relax in a hot tub it was going to be with D’Artagnan alone, snuggling in bubbling warm water was very appealing but not if he was going to be crammed in with a load of others as well.

He knew he needed to relax if he was going to help Athos relax. The other man would worry otherwise and D’Artagnan was tired of making that happen. Besides that he wanted him to be able to focus on healing, he was going to try to do what it took to calm his frayed nerves. Tea was usually a good place to start.

" Well I guess I do tea okay. " He said with a gentle laugh and looked back at Athos. He gave him a concerned once over look and frowned. "Why don't you sit down, love?" They had a table and chairs nearby. He didn't want to tire him out too much. "Yeah that sounds good. I don't really want to share it with strangers. " He admitted. "If I remember correctly our bath is rather large also. " He added with a shrug. If the hot tub was too crowded they could always share a bath...

Athos was likely to worry anyway and had he known D’Artagnan’s thoughts he would have chastised him. He would heal just fine even if he was worrying a little. Tea was an excellent place to start though.

“Wonderfully” he said, before waving off the concern. “I’ve been sat all day I can stand for a few minutes without doing any harm” he assured D’Artagnan, “Mmm a nice bubble bath with you sounds perfect. We definitely need to do that sometime soon”

He smiled at that, but he really wasn’t one to brag so he let it go. He was going to try to help Athos heal as quickly as he could. Which meant he would have to slow down with some things, and not wander off as much. He knew when he did he had a tendency to get into trouble. He was going to try and be cautious. “If you’re sure..” He knew Aramis had said Athos was beyond capable of knowing his limits, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t still try to help.

“Flattery will get you everywhere.” He teased with a smile as he poured two cups of tea and set one out for him once the water was ready. “I wouldn’t turn that down.” He chuckled as he decided to sit for a bit himself at the table just near by them. “On the alternative if you want one it might help soreness. I could run you one?” He waited for his tea to darken, toying with the tea bag.

Part of D’Artagnan’s charm was his ability to get into trouble without even meaning to so Athos wasn’t expecting miracles. He just hoped the things he got into would be things Athos could deal with even while not at 100%. “Positive” he said, he’d sit when D’Artagnan did but for now he’d hover. He really did feel the need to stretch his legs every now and then, especially with the increased number of naps he was taking lately.

Athos returned the smile, “I was hoping it might” he chuckled as he sat next to his boyfriend and took his hand automatically, twining their fingers. He shook his head at the offer, “Thanks but I’m hoping I can convince my wonderful boyfriend to come back to bed soon. That’s all I need”

All D’Artagnan could do was to try. He wouldn't make promises because he didn't know if he could keep them when it came to staying out of trouble. He knew he was still fretting over Athos but he couldn't help it. He'd been hurt and he wanted to take care of him. He knew Athos was not the sort to admit to his injuries so D’Artagnan was just going to try to pick up the slack where he thought he was needed most.

A warm laugh at that comment as he squeezed his hand affectionately. He couldn’t help but feel loved with comments like that. Just Athos's company was starting to make him feel better. The stress lines in his brow however remained. "I'm too easily convinced when in comes to you, you know that? " he sipped at his tea and made a face. "I still miss coffee..." He was getting used to tea now that he couldn't have much coffee anymore, but he was still getting used to the strange flavors.

Athos didn’t expect or want promises, as long as D’Artagnan was careful that was all he could really ask of the other man. In a county like this one it was never a good idea to ask for too much. It had a way of biting you on the ass. He was letting his boyfriend fuss over him more than he’d ever let anybody in the past, that definitely had to mean something.

Smiling Athos squeezed back, “Well that works both ways love” he replied, smiling an easy smile. “You’ll get used to it slowly. And you know one day you’ll be able to have coffee again, we just need to give it time. And persevere. You were doing better before, you will again once we’re settled” Athos raised their joined hands and placed a kiss on the back of D’Artagnan’s.

Even if Athos had tried to convince him not to worry about little things like that, there would be none of it. D’Artagnan wasn’t so easily pushed away when it came to people he loved. In the long run it was just better that Athos went along with it like he was. D’Artagnan frowned at that but nodded. “It isn’t as horrible as it was, but these flavors are strange. “ It didn’t help that the one he liked was left behind in the house. Aramis had just probably did his best with what they had, so D’Artagnan really didn’t complain at him.

“I know..it’s just hard. Coffee is apparently addictive.” He shrugged. There were worse things he could be addicted to though, so coffee wasn’t as bad as others. “I know it said no caffeine with the medication I was given but damn if I don’t want it.’ He grumbled moodily, but a little smile curved into his lips at the kiss. “You’re too good to me.”

“Maybe you should try some of the fruity teas” Athos said, “We’ll go and get you the one you like tomorrow” he added, because naturally he had noticed that it was missing. He’d meant to suggest they get it earlier but then he’d fallen asleep and forgotten when he’d woken from the unplanned nap.

“So I’ve heard” Athos replied, he’d given up coffee too for D’Artagnan, after all it wasn’t nice to drink it in front of him. Though he had snuck in the odd cup or two from a coffee shop while out. “I’ve told you before that’s not possible” Athos smiled kissing his fingers once more before lowering their joined hands.

D’Artagnan was glad Athos was getting the rest he needed, even if it meant lack of the tea he could stomach. This tea that Aramis had was a bit too strong for him. There weren’t other choices at the moment though so he only shrugged. “I forgot all about it until now.” He made a face. “Too strong.” But then it softened at the gentle kiss.

“You didn’t have to stop drinking too though you know.” He hadn’t expected Athos to quit and almost felt a little guilty about it. “Should we go back to bed then?” He brushed his thumb against Athos’ skin of his hand affectionately. “I think I can be still now. Or at least for a little bit.” He wasn’t as anxious anymore, just hanging around with Athos seemed to help.

Athos personally thought he was getting too much rest, but knew D’Artagnan wouldn't wake him even if he asked him too. Rest had been what the doctor said would aid the healing, but Athos didn't like feeling so useless. "Try some sweetener in it love" he suggested, it was better for him than sugar.

"I don't mind. Besides it's probably better for me not to drink it" he said before nodding, "Wake me up if you get restless again. I don't like the idea of you up alone with only your thoughts for company"

D’Artagnan made a face, but then grinned. “..You mean these piles of sugar packets, oh okay.” He reached for them hopefully, knowing full and well Athos didn’t mean that. He craved sugar. He couldn’t help it. He had to cut down on that too when insomnia struck, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want it anymore. That meant the opposite really. Especially at night when he used to go for a late night snack, and typically it was something sugar coated.

“If you’re sure. I won’t hate you if you decide you want coffee you know.” He mused until Athos was talking of waking him again, and D’Artagnan frowned.”The doctor said you need sleep to heal.” He began to stand, abandoning the tea he was so annoyed with. He sighed gently and looked over at him in concern. “I think I’ll be okay.” Though he was still worried about taking the medicine at all. It showed in his eyes, but he knew Athos was going to be here so at least he’d try.

Athos rolled his eyes at D’Artagnan but his smile was affectionate. It wouldn’t help him sleep but taking away both coffee and sugar seemed to be rather cruel and unusual punishment for his boyfriend. He was already suffering enough with not being able to sleep taking away everything he enjoyed too simply wasn’t fair.

“I know, I’ll still slip up sometimes but I’ll try not to in front of you. Doesn’t seem fair” Athos stroked D’Artagnan’s fingers with his own. “I also need to know my boyfriend is okay in order to heal” he said, standing too and pulling D’Artagnan into his arms. “I’m going to be right next to you the whole time. No matter what you will be safe in my arms, okay? Just try to remember that”

“It’s fine love, besides they said in a couple days I can start having it again anyway. It won’t be forever. I just don’t like it is all. I just can’t have it past eight. But I’m no good at scheduling sugar.” For the time being he was told until he got used to the medication in his system to be careful with it. It was very likely he could have some if he wanted, but D’Artagnan had a sweet tooth. He wouldn’t be satisfied with just a little. He was trying to be careful for both of their sakes, so Athos wouldn’t have to worry more mainly.

He leaned against him gently, still being wary of Athos’s wrist. “I know. “He really did, that was the entire reason he was even daring to try it, knowing Athos would be near by. It settled his frayed nerves having him close. He turned just slightly to kiss him affectionately.

The sugar was the easy part for Athos to avoid since he didn’t have a particularly sweet tooth anyway, coffee was his slip up. But as he’d said he wouldn’t slip in front of D’Artagnan, or at least he’d try not to. “We’ll work out the best way, don’t worry. I can help you schedule and make sure you stop at just the one cake or biscuit” he teased gently trying to relax him.

The painkillers were doing their job and Athos’ wrist was just aching a little, he appreciated the care though. “You’ll be okay D’Artagnan” he said against his lips before returning the kiss sweetly. His love obvious in every touch and word.

“Good luck with that one.” He teased in return. He knew he could be entirely petulant, but he would try not to be too incorrigible. For Athos’ sake he was trying to make things easier on the man, especially while he was healing.

“I always am wherever you are.” His voice barely audible as brushed his lips against the others. D’Artagnan wouldn’t take long to relax at this rate. As the kiss parted he took his good hand to lead him back to bed, curling up under the blankets with him again. He reached for the medication on the side table and waited for it to kick in.