InsaneJournal

Who: Padme Amidala and Anakin Skywalker
What: Padme has her final dream
Where: Their house
When: Late Wednesday evening/Early Thursday morning (5/7/14)
Rating: G
Status: Complete
Warning: TW: Discussion of Death


Everything hurt. Everything shouldn’t hurt, but reason seemed to fly out the door when it came to the dreams. This was the dream she had been dreading and it just seemed to slip in when she least expected it. Her earlier dream had been a simple one of her at work and then suddenly a wall of blackness appeared and she was thrust into the body of her dream self and it was the moment when her life was ending. It picked up after being choked on Mustafar and she was in her spaceship with Obi-Wan flying and her contractions were hitting her hard.

This couldn’t be good. Her heart was breaking and her children were coming before she was fully prepared and Anakin wasn’t there. Anakin had given everything in his life up in an attempt to save her, but he didn’t even realize how the Dark Side had taken over as he did this. She had wanted so desperately to save him, but it wasn’t going to happen. But at least she wasn’t alone because Obi-Wan was there to save her. Eventually the spaceship touched down on Polis Massa and she was taken into the medical room.

The pain of giving birth and feeling her heart dying was nothing compared to the brief joy she had when she was finally able to see her children and name them. Luke and Leia. Such beautiful names and hopefully they would grow to be beautiful children, but she knew that she would never be able to be there for them. But Obi-Wan was by her side and she could trust him to help take care of her children and protect them from the evil of the world. And she hoped that it wouldn’t include Anakin in the future, so with her final breaths she declared that she still felt good in him and slipped away.

With a gasping breath Padme’s eyes flew open and she reached her hand up to feel the tears on her face. She had to take a few deep breaths to try and contain herself before she burst into tears on this side of the dreams. Her hands quickly dropped to her stomach to make sure nothing had happened. Could the stress of this dream affect her children? Her mind was starting to swirl as she continued to cry and she rocked back and forth. It had finally happened. She had dreamt her death and it hurt so badly.

Padme in any sort of pain, he swore he could feel her emotions through the Force well enough now that they simply came to him, kicked him right out of sleep and into a wide-awake alertness. Nothing else in the room though. Nothing else in the house. Obi-wan was asleep in his room, Artoo was asleep at the foot of the bed, the only disturbance he felt was coming from Padme herself. His first thought was that there was something wrong with the children, he’d been paranoid about them since the beginning, every little noise or feeling of discomfort Padme had had him checking her and ready to call the doctor. She had tolerated it for the most part though told him to knock it off rather frequently, he didn’t listen then and wasn’t listening now.

He propped himself up on what was left of his burned elbow, bringing his real hand to rest on her belly, feeling for his children through the Force. “Padme? Padme, what’s wrong?” She was still rocking and crying and he couldn’t help but grow more concerned, especially as he felt nothing wrong with the little lives inside her. “Angel, what’s the matter?”

“Dreams,” she managed to choke out as she took a shaky breath and reached a hand up to brush away her tears, “My death.” It was too painful to actually say anything about it because she was still reeling from it. She could feel the pain still emanating and her heart felt like it was going to burst. She hoped it would because she was still a healthy young girl and she hadn’t felt the sort of loss that she had felt in the dreams. Anakin was here and with her and she reached out to grab at his hand.

Of course it was. He knew the end was coming for her, that it had been for a while now, though he had hoped it wouldn’t. She didn’t need that pain, pregnant or not it was traumatic and he would have shielded her from it if he had been able. It was bad enough hearing about her death, knowing he had caused it, he couldn’t imagine how much it had hurt to be there. His poor Padme. He moved his hand so she could grab it then laid down again, pulling her to him to hold her close. “I’m so sorry,” he kissed her temple. “So sorry.”

“It hurts,” she whimpered against him as she tried to bury her head against his neck. Being near him was helping, but she couldn’t help but remember how much of a part he played in her death. She died because he turned. She didn’t want that to happen here and would do her best to keep him on the light side of the Force in this world. Right now she was just thankful to have him and that nothing had happened to the babies from the dreams, but she might allow Anakin to make her go to the doctor to make sure they were fine.

“I’m sure it does.” Anakin had felt the pain when he dreamed too, burning alive then being put into that suit. He couldn’t take the thought of her suffering a little from what she had seen. He kissed her cheek, keeping her close. “But it’s okay, angel. Nothing is wrong. The babies are alright and I’m right here with you. We’re safe. It’s all just in your head, let it go. Focus on being here with me, just you and me and we’re okay.”

“Obi-Wan took me to some place on the ship after he left you. I gave birth to Luke and Leia and then just died. My last words were that I believed there was still good in you,” she knew that he would never know what happened to her in his dreams. The Jedi didn’t seem like they would want him to know since he turned to the Sith. She wondered what would happen to the twins in the future and wondered if Anakin would dream about that, “It felt so real, Ani. I could feel my heart stopping.”

Obi-wan had left him to die and as he understood it believed Anakin had perished in the lava and smoke and fire of Mustafar. He wondered if his master had told her what had happened but he wouldn’t press. Padme didn’t need to think of that now and he hadn’t wanted to explain to her what had happened to him unless she asked. It was horrific enough on its own, she didn’t need to hear it when she was in pain and fearing for her children, so sure that there was good somewhere in him when he knew it had died with her. He took her hand in his and brought it to his bare chest, making it rest over his heart before he put a hand on hers. “Hey, you feel that? Neither of these are going to stop any time soon. We’re gonna be okay. Long, happy lives with our children, that’s what is in our future.”

She tried to blink back the rest of her tears and keep them from falling down her face. She flexed her hand over his chest and nodded. His heart was beating strong and so was her own, but it felt so real. She had been afraid that something from the dream was going to bleed through one way or another and hurt her. “Oh god, I hope so. I was so afraid that I would wake up dead or the babies would be hurt. Things bleed over and it’s so scary to just go straight to blackness and then wake up. I’m almost glad it’s over now because now I can just focus on this life. The one with you right by my side the entire time.”

He kissed her again. That was all he ever really wanted, to be with Padme, to keep her safe. It hurt to think that someone he looked up to as a father could twist the love he had for her into a weapon he used to bring Anakin down. It wasn’t going to be like that now, nothing would come between them like that again, neither of them would let it. “You feel fine to me, but I’m not a doctor. Do you want to go to the hospital and make sure?”

“No...no,” she shook her head and buried her face against his neck. Her voice was muffled when she replied but she held on tight to his hand, “No hospital. I don’t want to go anywhere. I’m just a little scared to go back to sleep. Just stay where you are and don’t let me go, okay?” It seemed like a simple request. It wasn’t often that Padme let herself be vulnerable like this, but she wasn’t afraid to show him this side of her. Sometimes all you needed was someone to be there and keep you afloat for a little while.

“Never let you go, I promise.” he reassured her, combing his fingers through her hair. He could do that, he could stay up with her as long as she needed. She had been there for him plenty of times and now it was his turn, but he didn’t feel at all obligated, he would be there and comfort her as much as she needed because it was what he wanted. He wanted to be there with her no matter how she was feeling. “And if you do fall asleep I’m still gonna be right here with you, no matter what.”