InsaneJournal

I gave her mercy, and she gave me the means I needed to complete my task.
Who: Luthien and Faramir
What: Lunch and discussing Middle-earth
When: Late April
Where: A cafe
Status: complete
Rating: PG-13



Luthien had been unsure of what to wear. She hadn’t oft met someone from her dream world, but she did know she stood a good chance of dazzling them. She already had a look that was ethreal and movie-starish, but her elvish and Maiar blood had only made her look more like a walking goddess. Even in stylish skinny jeans and a white blouse, she looked like she’d stepped out of the mists of legend.

Even walking into a coffee shop.

Faramir was right. His students had appreciated being able to leave class early. Zero complaints. And so he went directly from class to the coffee shop to meet Luthien. THE Luthien. To say he wasn't a little nervous about it was a vast understatement.

He hadn’t been waiting long and was seated at a table, wearing black trousers and a white shirt. It wasn't anything special or extravagant, but he still wanted to look nice when meeting a historical figure from his dreams. It wasn't every day that happened.

It also wasn't difficult to pick out which person was Luthien Tinuviel, either. When he spied her, he smiled, and it was as though he was looking upon a rare flower that was the last of it's kind, and only bloomed once every hundred years in the middle of absolute nowhere.

He didn't wave, but he did not his head to her and stood up, to let her know that he was the one awaiting her arrival.

Faramir was such an Elvish name that she knew he was from her dreams. Some era, though which she didn't know. Was he an elf? Or Edain? She knew the Edain would later take elvish names.

She smiled at him, and it was as though her mother's light shone through her. She walked over, heels clicking on the tiles, and took a seat. Her voice was indeed musical, and she still had her French-Italian accent. "You must be Faramir."

"I am. And you must be Luthien," he said, sitting down as well. It was hard not to be entranced to the point of being rendered mute by her, but to Faramir's credit, he managed to keep himself in check. "It is a true honor to meet you in person. I can safely say that every word ever written about your beauty, was still sadly lacking."

She leaned over the table, holding out her hand in greeting. “I am pleased to meet you, and you do not need to flatter me. I am certain there are woman much more beautiful than I.”

"Historically speaking, I am unaware of any who are," he said, taking hold of her hand and bowed his head to her, out of respect. "It is also not flattery so much as it is truth. And I say as much even though I admire another whom I find beautiful, although I know not if anything will ever come of it."

Eowyn's was a beauty with hard edges, someone potentially deadly. Luthien, in his eyes, was ethereal...and vastly unobtainable. He knew nothing of Arwen Undomiel, but if her beauty had been likened to Luthien, then it was considerable, indeed.

Luthien chuckled, lifting her hand to have someone come over so she could order a coffee. With a lot of sweetener and sugar, because she liked her coffee to be more sweet than bitter. But there should be a little bitterness, life isn't always perfect. "So you have someone you fancy. I hope things work out for you. Besides music, there is little I appreciate more than romance."

She gave him a little wink. He looked like a scruffy ranger-man and she could appreciate a scruffy ranger-man.

Faramir ordered his coffee as strong as they could make it. It seemed as though he was accustomed to the bitter and he accepted it. With a small amount of sugar, of course.

"Alas, I must confess another truth," he said, with a self-reproachful smile. "I am uncertain if it is that, or...I forget myself. This is talk for another time, when thoughts are sorted out. I believe it is related to the dreams I've had, although in a way that has yet to be revealed. You are on the network, so you must know of them."

"Some things you know, when you first see them. When you first set eyes on them. Others, you don't know because it grows on you. One day you realize they're someone that you love." Luthien had experienced both kinds, in both of her lives.

"Yes, I've dreamed." She pulled her hair back and turned her head to show him her ears. "They've had a real effect on me."

Faramir got a good look at her ears and nodded.

"It would seem they have," he agreed, after a moment's contemplation. "Wise words, and I often thought much the same, even if now that is in days past. Now I wonder if it is merely some trick of the dreams twisting hearts and minds, and that which may not come to be in our waking hours. It is odd to me, that you are here. Do you know all of your dreams yet, or is the end still a mystery to you?"

“My dreams have been finished for a good long while. I know my fate, and I have seen the veil open before me,” Luthien replied, her eyes looking through Faramir and towards some distant memory. “What lies beyond, I have just the most fleeting of glimpses, for the dreams do not reveal more than that, nor do they reveal the rebuilding of the world, for that, and the Dagor Dagorath, have not yet happened. Or if they have, I have not dreamed of it. I hope, regardless, that I get to lend my voice to the song.”

"Then you know that which I implied," Faramir said, his gaze sorrowful, even if the rest of his expression seemed set in graven stone. "When my own dreams started, I questioned if these things had to do with the Dagor Dagorath. If any would know, it would be you. It does not seem so, and thus there must be some other mystery which binds us together."

There was one question that was first and foremost before all others, that he meant to ask. He did not hesitate.

"I do not mean to cause you any sorrow during our meeting," he confessed, even as his own curiosity got the better of him. He tried to approach it gently, and not seem too eager. "But I must ask, what of Beren? Have you found him as well in this lifetime? You have not mentioned him."

“I think that we are not yet in the time for that great battle, and this is just the world reformed through some other cataclysm. Perhaps it is not even the first time.” She didn’t know if she was right or not, but it was her theory. She gestured around her. “How many others have dreamed of a hundred different places? How many Ages have their been since mine? I know not. It is fun to speculate, and I wonder if this will be the last. Perhaps the Dagor Dagorath has already begun, for why would so many people be seemingly reborn?”

She picked up her coffee as it arrived, and sipped at it. “I’ve found him, but my father chased him away. I do not know what I would do now were he to find me, for my heart has found another.”

As Faramir listened, he silently agreed with the matter of dreaming and the Dagor Dagorath, since he had speculated much the same thing. As for that final admission? Well there went a whole other lifetime's worth of pointing out 'Look to Beren and Luthien, for an example of everlasting love.' Faramir tried to mask the expression on his face going grim, but wasn't quite able to entirely do so. And though he wasn't sure if Eowyn fit into his own dreaming life at all, a hard reality set in within himself, that simply because one dreamt it, didn't mean it was meant to be, in another lifetime. That might also be the same, and so it gave him much to think on, and more reason to proceed slower than before. His brother did warn him, after all, and perhaps Boromir knew something that he did not.

"...I see." That wasn't at all as playful or sneaky sounding as Lothiriel would have managed. "They say of the Eldar that once their heart is given to another, that it is hard to break such a bond. In my Age, we do not have contact with the Elves, as was done in Ages, prior. It has all become like old tales, told to children."

It was not his place to judge such decisions of others or begrudge them their happiness, and so he let the matter drop and instead moved with purpose onto the matter of the dreams.

"I always thought," he said with a sigh, "that reborn meant those who have died would be born with full knowledge of who they were, before. Not find out only when they have aged past childhood. There is also the matter of being born human. That is despite being something or someone else at some point in time, either long passed or yet to happen. I suppose such assumptions were misguided, indeed."

“What they speak of is indeed the truth. Though there was one exception.” She winked at him. “However, Beren and I parted paths while I was still mortal, and Elphaba and I met while I was still mortal. This new world has new rules…” She chewed on her lip, and it was a surprisingly human gesture. But then, she had chosen mortality before. “In my dreams, that love is so pure, and so much a part of me. I’m sure the tales exaggerate what we’ve done, but the things I’ve seen, the foes we faced…It all feels so real.”

She sighed, a long breath exhaled through her nose. “And I cannot say that my heart would not be torn in two. I will bear it, if it comes to that, of course. For them, and for my son, and for myself. But it is a bit selfish to hope that such a choice never comes before me. Or to hope the gods see fit to let me choose mortality again.”

There was sadness in Faramir's gaze as he listened to Luthien.

"I do not know, and the name Elphaba is foreign to me. This is a personal matter and that which is purely one's own path to tread upon, or weight to bear. I can do nothing other than to listen and hope to lighten that burden, somewhat. It has offered much food for thought, and so - at a later time - I shall think further on such matters."

He smiled a little and said, "The dreams are disconcerting, always with a darkness creeping ever closer, that we feared living under and had to keep at bay. I had pleasant dreams at first of reading many tales or talk of lore, when I was very young. And as I grew older, I hadn't as much time as one would wish, to do so. They must somehow be connected with this area, to affect so many."

“I think for most, the dreams of youth are the most pleasant. At least I’d hope so.” Far too many children suffered as it was. “But Shadow is something that is part and parcel of Middle-earth, I think.” She trailed her finger along the edge of her mug. “Without darkness, there is no light. Without light, there is no darkness, and most, I think, are some combination of the two. There is a story, that few know the full truth of. What have you read of Thuringwethil?”

"It may have been part of Middle-earth? But I would always rejoice and embrace that which is light and good, rather than accept any darkness like that as a simple inevitability," was Faramir's softly spoken reply. "I remembered she was a messenger of Sauron, with iron claws and wings. A foul creature. It is said by some that you took on her likeness as a disguise, be it by wearing her hide or other means. Even so? A moment of cloaking one's self in darkness was for an ultimate good or end, and is different than a combination of dark and light, or becoming part of that darkness."

“You forget, I made a mantle of my own hair. Is that not a darkness? But they say I took her life to take her form. What they don’t sing about, is that she gave it up willingly. She was a complicated creature, a being to be pitied and not scorned.” Certainly more of a challenge than an orc or Warg, at any rate. “Foul, yes, but I’m certain she was beautiful once. Before the Dark Lords corrupted her. She sensed a kinship in me. Perhaps through my mother, to a time before darkness warred with light. I gave her mercy, and she gave me the means I needed to complete my task.”

"That is the thing. I feel pity for those who do embrace such darkness, rather than scorn," Faramir pointed out. "It brings me to sadness, much like these things I am hearing. Not all sadness is unwelcome, for it can bring understanding.

"But that is not true darkness. You did not do such deeds with darkness in your heart, whether the creature willingly gave her life, or not. I would take no joy in the killing of it, for what it once was, and what it had been twisted into. But I would not feel anything more than pity for it, and if it is to protect that which is good, I would slay it. Even if it was a hard task. For it is one thing to seek mercy in death or ask forgiveness for such deeds. And even another as we must live with the many mistakes we might make over time, that could turn us into twisted creatures in either our hearts or bodies, and become that which others might pity. Some darkness is evil most absolute."

He sighed and looked forlorn, pensively staring down into his own cup of coffee that he had only then remembered had been served to him.

"I mean no disrespect. You are wise and learned, and I come from a different time and place, where it is sadly no longer so. I say this only from the perspective of a Ranger," he confessed. "One that had been trained to fight against the evil which might be found in foes, either man or beast. Even if I had no heart for killing? I would volunteer a million times over and lay down my own life, if I had to protect that which is good, noble, or loved."

"You are a good man, Faramir. Good men like you would have been welcome among the Edain of my time." She reached over across the table, putting a hand on Faramir's arm. "Even Melkor was once made of light. One of Eru's chosen. You can take it as a lesson that even the mighty can fall - or as a lesson that there might always be a way to claw out of the darkness, should you ever find yourself in it. But I think you would have a better time than most. Your heart is… so pure."

"I would like to believe that I would not find myself in such a place, but one can never say never," he told Luthien, smiling with gratitude. She was kind and the touch of her hand set troubled thoughts at ease. "And you are as wise as you are fair, to see things from both sides. I often try to do so as well, even if I know that there is always some darkness that will need to be fended off. Either for our own sakes, or for the sakes of others not able to do so, for themselves. I do not see the likes of such here, other than the petty crimes of petty men, borne out of their own greed or malice. I leave it to the police and courts to keep them in check, when they are apprehended."

"I am not that wise. I am still human, in my heart." Her smile widened. "But there have been wise mortals. Something tells me you would be one. And you are right, in part. There was darkness. But it was pushed back. There was this ring..." And Luthien shuddered, visibly. "It was so tempting. nothing like anything I've handled before. Even my Silmaril."

Which she wore, beneath her shirt, always. There was no other place safe.

His brow was furrowed at the mention of a ring, but it was more out of confusion than knowledge of any rings.

"I also would lay no claim to being counted amongst the wise," he replied, after a moment's hesitation. It was like he should have some memory of such things. But again, as it had been in past days, it was a thought that was fleeting, ungraspable, and then gone, entirely. "I am only thoughtful and perhaps only smart enough to avoid temptation. And you have seen things that I have not, nor am I ever likely to. That is just as well. I feel no desire to even look upon such things, much less to have them in my keeping."

"Living in this place, I'm afraid that you will see things in due time that will cause you to question the nature of reality itself. Things...happen here. Events from our dreams, and from others. I, personally, have taken the head off of an orc. Not in Beleriand, not in Doriath, but here, in Orange County." It was only fair, and only right to warn him. She decided not to reveal the silmaril, though. For his own safety. With Frodo it had been different. She’d wanted him to understand she understood magical items.

If she had even offered, Faramir would have politely refused. It would be much the same as he had no want for it even, when he knew of Frodo and Samwise's errand with their skulking little friend. He really meant it when he said he would not take it if it lay by the highway. And not even if Orange County was falling into ruin and he alone could save it from Orcs, deaging, or rabid Easter bunnies, using it for everyone's good and his own glory.

"I am already aware that we are in the midst of such madness. Both myself and my brother have already spent time as children for a few days. We are on the Valar net, and there is often talk of things there that would send even the most insane running away, screaming." He laughed and shook his head, even if it was not quite as mirthful as he wished it could be. "I worry for the safety of my own family, and have taken the necessary precautions. I would not have any harm befall them, if it can be prevented. But I thank you for your warning."

Mostly she liked to show it because it was so shiny and glowy and ahahaha Feanor you cannot has you're probably watching from Mandos and shaking your fist. Dick

"If you crave adventure, you will surely find it. And if not, you know enough to defend yourself when you need to."

Faramir laughed and it was done with much more ease, this time.

"It is far more likely that I will be on the defense, rather than taking the offensive front. I will leave that to my brother, Boromir. It suits him well!"

“Boromir. That is another very good name!” Luthien clapped her hands together. “A name of the House of Beor, from the sound of it.”

"Indeed, it is. Very appropriate for the eldest son." Faramir was poking fun at himself when he added, "He is the heir, and I am but the spare. Not only there, but here as well!"

This didn't seem to bother him. The primary reason for that was he loved his brother and couldn't be jealous of him, and he still loved his father, even if Denethor was remote and a recluse.

Luthien laughed. She got the joke and she understood that it didn’t seem to bother him, at least on the surface. “Your father hedged his bet.”

Not on the surface, no. Deep down? Yes, it did. It didn't change that he was doing what he thought right, despite what his father's beliefs were, or what actions he might take. So if he was bothered, it was an old sadness akin to a scar. There was nothing new about it, and more so because it was the same in his dreams, too.

He sounded pleasant despite the fact he very truthfully admitted, "I think it would have pleased him more, had he stopped at one! He is always pleased with Boromir, and rarely - if ever - with anything I do. Alas! There is but the one thing that we have no choice in, and that is the family we are born into. Such is the case, here. I suppose this means also that Thingol and Melian are still your parents in this life as well. I hope they are together and well?"

“In my experience, a father can be wrong, and standoffish, but still love you,” Luthien said. “Though yours sounds like a handful. I think I would take over-protective instead.” She smiled, and nodded. “Yes. They are back home in Monaco. I recently regained custody of my son from them. A folly of my youth, to let him convince me he was better off there, than with me.”

"I think that is the case. Although it was brief, when I was turned into a child? He was gentle, and then could not resist a subtle jab in the form of trying to sway my political leanings from left to right."

Faramir smiled a little wistfully and he looked lost in his own thoughts, although that passed quickly, and he focused back on Luthien once again.

"I do not mean to pry," he started to say, after a few second's worth of hesitation. But iIs Beren the father of your son, and is that the reason that he was chased off by your father?”

If so, that was tragic, indeed. And more so that there was a Beren out there, somewhere, that didn’t even know he was Beren.

“I am sure he would be disappointed in my leanings,” Luthien said, with the air of someone who would have been pretty at home as a flower child of the 60s. Her cheeks tinged a little, and she nodded her head. “I’ve looked for him. He should know, but I’ve never found him. I can’t even...sense him. I should know if he is alive or not, but I just …” She cut herself off before she got more distraught. “...I think if he dreams I will sense him then. For now, he just can’t be found. If he is even alive.”

Faramir immediately regretted asking, and that regret showed clearly in his eyes.

"I should not ask such things. I apologize." He sighed a little, feeling guilty for causing her any distress. "Chance may have it that you will cross paths again, and then you can tell him the truth of things. Let us not speak of such things again. Consider matters of the heart to be much like speaking of...politics, or religion."

They were feelings she hadn’t expected to drag up, but she should have. She didn’t know if she felt better or worse that they were even there! She nodded. “That would be wise, my friend. While I do enjoy speaking of matters of the heart, that is one door that should remain locked.”

"And so it shall be," he readily agreed. "For myself, I prefer that all such doors remain closed for the time being. Perhaps, some day, that might change. In the meantime, such matters are intensely personal and should be dealt with, accordingly."

“Of course.” Luthien finished her coffee and looked into the cup a little mournfully. “One thing I can say, is I missed out on coffee in my dreams.”

"We had coffee," Faramir admitted, a little sheepishly. "I think I lived on it, when it was available. It wasn't as plentiful as it is, now. And if the supply routes were set upon, then things ran dry. It was difficult not to be a little irritable. I had a headache for a week, the first time that happened."

“Ah, in that you are lucky! We had some foul tasting root, after I became mortal.” Tiredness had been the hardest thing for her to adjust to. But it had been worth it.

"That sounds most unpleasant!" He made a terrible face at the thought. "I think we are both in luck? We can now drink as much as we like, without having to get by when there's only foul roots and trade is hindered. There is practically a Starbucks or other coffee shop, on every other street corner."

“I might be an addict. But I am used to gourmet coffee in France and Italy. My family have a great deal of money and sway back home. I am happy to be here though. To stretch my own wings.”

"And so it is good you are here and have such freedom. If you had not found your way to this place, then you would not know what you once were."

The elven lady nodded at him. “It has it’s challenges, but is that not the spice of life?”

"Perhaps," he said with a grin, "but I think many have had their fill of spice and might prefer the bland."

“For a time.” She waved a hand, but gave him a wink. “I do understand the need for bland quiet. I spent much of my mortal life with that gift.” A little hint, that the dreams can take one over decades and centuries.

A hint that he committed to memory, for when he spoke to his father again. Or when they next tried to speak, since it had been a long while. It also occurred to him that dreaming about one's whole life from beginning to end was strange, and might not be so comforting to many. Depending on the manner of their deaths, of course.

"There was a saying, 'May you live in interesting times'." Faramir winked back at her. "It was meant as a curse, and not a blessing. I suppose it depends muchly on the individual and their temperament, how well they react to any interesting times."

“For some a curse, for others a blessing and yet for all of us an opportunity. I have been here for some time now, and there are those who see their mistakes and their traumas and turn that knowledge into something of use.” So many talked of it on the valarnet, that it was impossible to avoid.

"We have lived here for a very long time, and yet nothing happened to myself or my brother, at all. Not until we signed up for that network, or perhaps it was after we took notice of what was happening. I know not."

He was no long grinning so much, his expression having gone bittersweet and lost in memory.

"And there is no doubt some that will see their mistakes and traumas, and know despair or fall back into old habits. I always prefer to be cautiously optimistic, but with a healthy dose of realism. My days of being a young boy who listened to the tales of wizards, or spent idle days playing out what it would be like to slay dragons with a wooden sword? They are long since passed. By the account of Men, of course. And such things never happened in this life. It was idle games of war, using our action figures."

“That is something I do not have the answer for,” Luthien admitted. “How it all starts. Perhaps we are needed for something. Many have already heeded the call. But know this. The choice is yours what you choose to do with your dreams. Become that man, or turn from him, or find some balance in between.” She traced her own ear. “No matter what physical form you end up taking.”

"I have already considered that, before," Faramir said, nodding in agreement. "However, I am only a man. If need arises, then I will act. But only if there is need. In times such as this, there are others better suited than I am to deal with any problems. Although I question if there need be vigilantes, when there are still the police and other such institutions, to sort through such matters."

He shrugged and looked apologetic, since he couldn't see that happening with him or his family. As Boromir had said, there wasn't much use in having a sword. People had guns. And Faramir longed to use his bow, and only then for target practice. The thought of killing needlessly did not appeal to him, in either realm. At any rate, it was all a matter best left to the authorities.

Luthien agreed for the most part, but then she didn’t think many police forces could handle people who could fly around. “I saw a woman flying once. She moved like a jet and was gone so quickly I almost thought I’d hallucinated it!”

"Then it would take a jet to catch her, should she do any wrong. That is a matter best left to the military," he said with a laugh and a shake of his head. "I would not stand a chance against such a person, should they be a foe. Although I would hope that would not happen. It is better to gain a friend than a foe."

“I understand she gives flying lessons. In an airplane.” Luthien grinned at him. “She is probably a good person, but I am wont to think the best of people.”

"As am I, unless I am given reason not to. So let us trust and hope she remains firmly on the side of good."

“And many others do…” She picked up her purse, and pulled out some cds. “Here! Before I forget. I have signed them for you. Both of my American albums and my European album.”

He looked profoundly grateful as he took the cds.

"This is quite the gift," he confessed. "Long did I wonder what it would have been like to hear you sing. And now I am able to, as well as share it with my family. You have my thanks."

“Would you like to hear it live?” Luthien asked, eager to sing at the drop of a hat. (Her house was full of constant music and song)

"It would be an honor." He nodded. "If it is not an inconvenience."

“Walk with me, then.” Luthien got to her feet and held out her hand. “There is a park nearby. I think it would be the most appropriate place.”

"By all means? Lead on." A smiling Faramir stood and took her hand without hesitation.