Jeremy Gilbert (savedbythering) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2014-01-26 19:18:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, ezio auditore da firenze, jeremy gilbert |
Who: Jeremy Gilbert and Ezio Auditore
What: Jeremy finally seeks out some profesional help
When: Backdated: Thursday, January 23rd. Afternoon
Where: Ezio's Office
Rating: Mostly Family Friendly. Mentions of NPC deaths.
Status: Complete
Despite what one might guess, Ezio actually preferred his dreamer patients to those who had more mundane problems. Those with mundane issues either listened to him or didn’t - dreamers often had more knotty problems, and potential ramifications even if they did follow what might be termed the ‘acceptable’ course. He liked challenges, and he liked getting down in the muck and really helping people. He was of the opinion that his next patient might be one of those.
He opened the door to his waiting room, looking around at the couple of people waiting. The young man was who he was here for. “Jeremy?” Ezio said, not yelling, but loud enough to get one’s attention.
Jeremy had been looking, on and off, for someone to talk to ever since he’d come to the realization that he needed help back in August, but he hadn’t really known what to look for in a therapist and hadn’t known if he needed to tell Elena or needed a legal guardian, so it had all fallen to the wayside for awhile. However, after Christmas when Elena and Damon had gotten engaged, he’d realized that he needed to renew his search, otherwise he was going to wind up pushing everyone away. He’d found Ezio fairly easily and had called his office to find out what he needed to do to make an appointment and once all of that was done, all he had to do was wait for the date.
When that date came around, Jeremy headed over to his office, checked in and waited to be called. Hearing his name, he glanced up, seeing the man then got to his feet and headed over to join him, “Hi, Dr. Auditore.”
Ezio offered a hand to shake - the best way to treat young men was to treat them like men, in his estimation - and gestured for Jeremy to come inside. “It is nice to meet you. Please, come in here.” His office was a little more modern than most, in an effort to be both masculine and feminine. No mahogany leather for him. “I trust the office was not difficult to find?”
Jeremy nodded as he stepped onto the office and glanced around, not really sure what to do next, “Yeah, it wasn’t that difficult.” He waited until Dr. Auditore closed the door then turned to face him, “So, I’m not really sure how all of this works. I’ve never been to a shr….therapist before.” Did he just start talking about his problems or did the doctor ask him questions? Jeremy really hoped that this hadn’t been a mistake.
“I personally find that the best way to go about things is that you simply tell me what is bothering you. That is - where it began.” If he could simply tell Ezio what was wrong, he wouldn’t be here. “Some of my patients come in and say ‘I need help dealing with my dreams’. Others say ‘I want to straighten out my marriage’, others say ‘I have been the victim of a crime and now I am frightened.’ What troubles you, Jeremy?”
When Ezio mentioned dreams, Jeremy realized that the other man must be a dreamer too and oddly enough, that helped ease a little bit of the tension he’d been feeling. Could he tell the older man about his dreams and not seem like a complete weirdo? Sighing, Jeremy, ran a hand through his hair before turning to take a seat on the nearest spot that seemed like it was where other patients sat, “Okay, well….one thing is that I need help dealing with my parents’ deaths. They….they were murdered back in July…” Jeremy paused for a moment, staring down at his hands the whole time he spoke. He hadn’t talked about this with anyone else besides Myrcella or Stiles really, “I found them.”
Ezio blinked. “Dio mio, I am so sorry.” His tone was full of very real sympathy. He’d seen the dead before - in morgues, in his dreams at his feet - but a young man, still finding himself, coming home to see the bodies of those he loved best discarded like corn husks? A nightmare. “I would have been beside myself. I can certainly do my best to help - much of my practice is with people who have suffered a traumatic event, and that most certainly qualifies. Such things create so much pain and anger, and we must find a way to deal with these things in a good way.”
Jeremy could tell that the older man was genuine when he gave his condolences, so he felt he could continue, “I have two sisters and since then one of them has taken off and the other one spends all her time with her boy...fiance and that leaves me alone, in our house, most of the time. Technically they’re supposed to be my legal guardians now since they’re eighteen and I’m seventeen, but it’s pretty much just me unless my girlfriend or my best friend comes over.” He wondered if he should add how he disliked being alone in the house since finding his parents murdered there, but decided not to throw too much at the doctor at once.
Ah. Ezio sighed. “I wish the court had not done that, appointing your sisters as guardians. I understand why they did - if you are seventeen, you will be of age by the time they could appoint a proper guardian - but at the same time, it is not fair to you or them.” He sat back in his chair. “When you are seventeen or eighteen, you are almost an adult. You can do most things for yourself. But an eighteen year old and a seventeen year old are going through almost the exact same things when a trauma happens. They just show it differently.”
He looked over. “Your sister may be burying her pain by spending time with her fiance, who is not yet part of the family - who does not have the same intimate suffering that you do. It is not fair of her, but it may be how she is coping, while you do it differently. Capisci? It is not fair to her for the court to say ‘You must look after Jeremy’ while she is handling her own pain. And it is not fair to you that she is placed in this position, because most grieving eighteen year olds cannot help anyone else to grieve as well.”
While deep down Jeremy knew it wasn't fair that Elena was more or less forced to be his guardian, he still thought it was unfair of her to spend so much time with Damon instead of him, "What makes it more complicated, is that her fiancé is older and had a thing with my other sister a few years ago when she was underage and he's a douche. He's in our dreams too and there he's a vampire and obsessed with Elena and killed me, not realizing that I was wearing a ring that would bring me back from supernatural deaths." Jeremy realized how crazy that all sounded and as he spoke, he twisted, said ring, around his middle finger. It was a hard ring to miss with its size and rectangular black stone.
Ezio held up a hand. “Aspetta, wait, please. Let me go over this slower, if that is all right.” He wanted to make sure that he understood. “Both your sisters have dated this man, and now he is engaged to one of them? That is certainly troubling.” The sister might be masking her pain with this man, but that had little to do with Jeremy. “And in the dream world, he is obsessed with your sister Elena, and got you out of the way?” It didn’t take a genius to interpret those two things into how Jeremy seemed to be feeling.
“Obviously, you dislike him because you fear that he is taking advantage of your sister. Si?” That was fairly indisputable - Jeremy had said it himself, practically. “What I might also suggest is that you feel he is replacing you.” Ezio looked over at the young man. “You are used, I would think, to keeping an eye on your sisters. But now your sisters do not need you, or so it feels like.”
Jeremy wouldn’t call what Katherine and Damon had done dating, but he wasn’t going to get into that at the moment. “Yeah, more or less. And it’s not so much that I used to keep an eye on them, I just think it’s really creepy that they’re together when he used to be with my other sister. I mean, they’re twins. Isn’t that creepy?” He just couldn’t understand how Elena didn’t think that was creepy or strange.
“My girlfriend and my friend are the only ones who seem to understand why I don’t like him. Damon just tells me that it’s my fault Elena doesn’t want to spend time with me.” Just talking about it made Jeremy want to hit Damon or something. “She says she wants to fix things between us then leaves me alone on Christmas Eve to go to New York with him then spends all her time at his place, leaving me alone at our house, where our parents were murdered.”
“It is odd. And I would question this Damon’s motives.” Ezio nodded. He wasn’t just saying that; he agreed with Jeremy. “Telling you that it is your fault that your sister is staying away - this is wrong, on every level.” His tone grew stern. “This is what is called gaslighting - to make you believe that everything is fine or that something bad is your fault. Nothing is your fault. The choices of your sister are not your fault, nor is it your fault that this event happened.”
His sister, though. That was something he could help more with. “Without knowing every detail of the situation, I can only say that your sister is most likely grieving equally as badly as you are. But she is handling it very badly. Your sister is showing classic signs of simply wanting to run away from everything. She seems to think if she simply avoids it all, it will go away.” Ezio shrugged. “She does not want to stay in the house; she does not want to look upon family things - and this might include you, yes, but it is not your fault. It is because you remind her of the family life she no longer has. And nothing will change that but time. Or a very good professional. Not a hurried marriage.”
“So what am I supposed to do? She’s the only family I have left out here and I’ve told her how I feel and I just don’t know what to do. Damon has implied that he wants Elena to live with him and she can’t just leave me alone and I won’t live with Damon.” If Damon could become a crazed vampire at some point as a result of the dreams, Jeremy didn’t want to be anywhere near him.
“What I would suggest right now is for you to talk - you and your sister, not you and this Damon - with a professional. Together. Either you can bring her here, or I can help you to find someone else.” Ezio said. “Left to yourselves, you will go around in circles - I do not say this to be rude, but because people see what is hurting them first, before what is hurting others. Your sister must see that she cannot abandon you - actually, if she does, she is in contempt of court, if she has been named your legal guardian. And you could perhaps benefit from seeing how she copes with terrible things.”
When Jeremy thought about it, he thought that, that was probably a good idea. Jeremy could tell Elena how he felt until he was blue in the face, but it would take someone else to actually get through to his sister. “I’d actually like to come back here. If she’s up for it.” Jeremy had already come to trust Ezio and he didn’t want to have to rehash everything he’d already told him to someone else.
“I am not trained in mediation, but I will do my best.” Ezio nodded. “Really, sometimes all it takes is to hear the same thing from different lips. I do not mean that you did anything wrong in telling her how you feel, but there may have come a time at which she decided not to listen. Tell me - has she been discussing this awful thing with anyone that you know of? Or is she the sort to keep it all in?”
Jeremy nodded, he could understand that. He just wanted this whole thing fixed. In response to Ezio’s question, Jeremy thought for a moment, “Probably Damon. And she has a few friends who know what happened. I’m sure she’s talked to them about it.” Everyone always seemed to have something to say in her defense when he started talking about how he felt about everything that was going on, so Jeremy had no doubt that she’d talked to her other friends about the situation with him and their parents.
Ezio nodded. “I merely wonder. I really am disappointed in the court in making your sisters your guardians - a guardian is meant to have more experience of the world than the one they guard, so to speak. Your sisters and you are at about the same stage in your lives. It is il cieco che guida un altro cieco - the blind leading the blind.” He sighed. “I hope I can help. I will do my best, of course, but if she is simply unwilling to listen, you have two other options.” He ticked them off on his fingers. “One, go to the court and say she has been an unfit guardian. They will appoint a new one, but there would be adverse consequences to your sister. Or two, make your way the best you can without her. It is a horrible, hard choice, but I only wish to make the point that one cannot make somebody listen. If they are a good person, they ought to - but no one is a miracle worker.”
Jeremy nodded, “My aunt, my mother’s sister, doesn’t live close and is busy finishing up graduate school and my uncle, my father’s brother, is god knows where right now, so it was only Elena and Katherine at the time. They had just turned eighteen and I hadn’t turned seventeen yet.” Jeremy’s birthday was in September, so at the time of their parents’ deaths, he had still only been sixteen. “Last time I told her what was wrong, she said she wanted to fix things, but she didn’t know how then her and Damon got engaged right after that and they’ve only been dating like five months.” Jeremy still thought that was far too soon.
“It very much sounds like she is just out of her depth.” Ezio shook his head. “Appointing a social worker or something like that would have been the right idea - someone who is older and would know better how to help you both.” But then the clock beeped softly, and he turned back. “Allora. Our time is up, but I would be happy to see you again if you wish, as well as possibly bringing your sister here. I would like to help you patch things up, but I would most of all like to help you get through this. What happened was terrible, and you should have had more help in managing it from the very beginning.”
“Thanks. I’d been wanting to talk to someone for awhile, but didn’t want someone to tell me I was crazy or needed meds or anything,” Of course that fact that he often talked about this stuff with Stiles when they were high probably didn’t help his paranoia at being labeled crazy. “I’ll talk to Elena then make another appointment.” Jeremy got to his feet, wiping his hands on his jeans. It might have seemed silly, but he already felt a little better, but now came the hard part. Fixing something that had been broken for the last few months.
“There is nothing wrong with needing medication, should it ever become necessary, but no, I do not think it is right now.” Ezio offered his hand for another shake. “Both you and she are out of your depth, and hopefully with a little guidance, you can get back to where you need to be.” He watched the young man go, not entirely sure how the next appointment would work out, but willing to try.