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Bella Donna Boudreaux is a cheerful assassin (petitmort) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-11-23 16:07:00

Who: Belle Boudreaux and Emma Swan
Where: a gym, then a smoothie shop
What: chatting, making friends
When: recently
Warnings/Rating: PG
Status complete

Belle leaned against the wall of the gym, contemplating a pack of cigarettes. It was still sealed, and she wasn’t quite at the point where she’d decided to unwrap them. She wasn’t sure how to react to losing Vanille. The last time she’d lost anyone she’d immediately buried herself in her work, and truthfully she’d never dealt with it. She knew she could talk to Nicholas about it, but talking didn’t help much.

She pulled her ponytail out, letting her hair hang around her face so it would dry. She was supposed to go back to work, but she didn’t feel up for it right now. Mr. Frost could wait a few more minutes.

Emma was just out of the shower and ready to find her way home, but a part of her felt like she should probably do something with her day. Yes, it was great that she took care of herself and went to the gym a lot -- but what else was she doing with her life? It was frustrating, because even though she was trying to stretch her wings in California, it was hard.

She was pulling fingers through damp hair and curling strands, trying to manage the curls that were no doubt going to spring up, when she noticed a woman leaning against the wall. It was probably a random thought, but she offered her, “You were really good. In the class, I mean.” Was it weird to have noticed someone else’s form? Uh, maybe. And weirder to talk about it, probably.

It wasn’t weird. Belle pocketed the pack of cigarettes and smiled at Emma. “Merci, chere. I thought you did well too. It’s nice t’ get out and play with other people sometimes.” She grinned at Emma and offered her hand to shake. “I’m Belle, it’s nice t’ meecha.”

Emma gave her a small smile and accepted the handshake. Somehow she hadn’t been expecting that accent, but she didn’t mind it. “Hi. Emma. Nice to meet you too,” she answered. She was trying to get better about knocking together conversations with strangers, but a lot of the time she still felt awkward. “And thanks. I’m pretty new to kickboxing, but I liked it. It’s really a workout, though, huh? I’m going to feel that in the morning.”

Belle nodded. “It is. I haven’t been in a while. Thought it would be good to get out and get some fresh air.” Kicking things also helped. “You gonna stick with it? I don’t do this too often myself, but I’ve been thinkin’ about picking it up.”

Was she going to stick with it? That was a good question. Emma seemed to take a few classes and then move on to the next thing. Maybe focusing on one class wasn’t a terrible idea. “Maybe. I really liked it, it seems like it’d be easy to use in a real-world situation.” Emma’s punches didn’t need that much work but she did need to know how to defend herself. “I’m a body guard, so I really need to be able to keep up.”

“Oh! I bet that’s fun, at least some of the time. What kinda people you guard?” She liked to see women doing badass jobs. It made her feel less like an anomaly.

“I’m really not picky on that, really. Anybody that will hire me,” Emma admitted, running fingers through her hair. “Usually it’s starlets, though. Since I moved here. I put on a tight dress and drink champagne and pretend I’m not a threat. Usually it’s pretty boring, but there are some creeps around here.” And something about stardom made people think they could do anything to a celebrity, a mindset that really bothered her.

“Umm. Are you busy? You want to get a drink, or something?” There was a juice store around the corner, there was probably something healthy-ish they could indulge in… or coffee. There was definitely coffee nearby, too.

“That sounds like an interestin’ job. I’d love t’ get a drink.” She tugged the hood of her jacket up to ward off the rain. “There’s plenty of places close, and I’m not picky about this kind of thing.” Some company would surely cheer her right up, and she’d have an easier time explaining why she was late to Winston than why she’d started smoking again.

“It is. I mean … I like it. I’ve always been kind of scrappy, you know? And it’s nice to be able to protect people.” Half the time she just stood around looking hot in bandage dresses but the times she did get to put her skills to use, it was thrilling. Emma didn’t have a hood but her hair was still damp so the light rain didn’t really bother her.

Pleased that Belle had agreed to a drink, Emma smiled. “Well… since I just kicked my own ass in there, I was thinking a smoothie. They’re kind of faux healthy but they’re so tasty.” Emma wanted something with pineapple in it, suddenly. And randomly, Emma finished, “I don’t mind if you smoke.” She didn’t smoke anymore, but if Belle wanted to, she didn’t care. California could be picky about cigarettes so she wanted her to know she didn’t mind.

“Smoothie sounds good.” Belle said with a nod. Emma’s reassurance caught her off guard and she laughed nervously. “My boyfriend’ll bitch. I quit ‘bout a month ago. Hard t’ stick to it when shit’s going down, but I’m trying to be good.” The smoothie place wasn’t far down the street, Belle figured she’d walk it. “If you’re gonna drive I’ll meet you there.”

Emma shook her head slightly. “Nah, I walked here,” she informed her. California was really a drive town, but Emma had gotten into the habit of running to the gym. Two workouts at once that way. Sometimes she regretted it, and maybe she would today, considering the chances were she was going to get pretty sore by the time she headed home, but she could take a bus or call Mary Margaret or something.

“Oh… I get that. It’s hard to quit,” Emma said sympathetically. She’d quit after a pregnancy scare, and she decided her life was completely incapable of that sort of life change. “Bad things happening, I guess? Sorry to hear that.” She was curious, but it wasn’t really her place to ask a stranger.

Belle nodded, then shrugged. “I’ll be fine.” She didn’t want to talk about it. Some things had changed, but she wasn’t one to open up to people except in very superficial ways, especially at first. “How long has it been? The cravin’s ever stop?”

Emma couldn’t hold that against her. Emma was pretty superficial in most of her interactions herself. It was enough to know that something in her life was stressing her out enough that she wanted to smoke, and to offer her sympathy. “For me? Oh, it’s been… about seven years, I guess. And it depends. Sometimes I’ll want one, when things get really bad. Or after sex. I used to love to smoke after sex.”

Belle nodded, smirking a little. “Yeah, it was always so satisfying. But that’s part of the reason I stopped. Couldn’t smoke inside around Nicholas, so I had t’ get dressed, run out to the balcony, smoke, then go inside and do whatever we were gonna do. It’s nicer to stay in bed and relax, or shower together.” But she still kind of wanted her fix, even then.

Emma hadn’t quit for a boyfriend, she wasn’t sure she ever would have. She’d quit for herself, but she couldn’t deny there were parts of it she missed. “I liked to share them. But yeah, if he doesn’t smoke, it makes sense. Don’t want to kill the afterglow because you have to go smoke.” It was a good, healthy choice to give up smoking, but Emma totally understood how hard it was. “It’ll get easier. I mean, sometimes I think I’ll want one, and sometimes I’ll even fold and have a cigarette with a drink or something. But I don’t need them anymore.” And it was liberating to be able to say that.

Belle hadn’t exactly quit to please Wolfwood. It was, like everything else about her insane life, a long story. She did envy Emma’s lack of addiction. She knew she was recovering, and that she had to be patient, but the idea of being able to have just one cigarette and not pick the habit up again was extremely attractive. “I’m happy for you, and I hope I get to that point.” She was completely sincere. Seeing others succeed made her happy, and made her feel good about the world. “Thanks for the encouragement.”

“Thanks.” It did help that Emma was a stubborn creature. She told herself she didn’t need more than one and apparently, her body was used to being without the nicotine enough that it believed her. “It is nice. I mean, sometimes I miss it. But then I think about how much I spent on cigarettes and I’m so glad I stopped. Oh, and the health reasons, too, but shit they’re expensive.” Emma laughed a little, because it was a little superficial to be pleased to quit smoking because she was tired of paying for them. “And you’re welcome. You’ve already kicked it, so you managed the hardest part.”

The smoothie shop was just ahead, and Emma jogged a few steps to grab the door and hold it open for the other blonde.

Belle grinned widely at the courtesy. She did enjoy the extra money. “Merci. You’re quite courteous on top of bein’ the most badass person in the room.” She winked at Emma. Making people smile was always nice, and Belle thought the compliment would please her.

“At least until you walk into it,” Emma said, shaking her head, but Belle did earn a small smile for that. Emma didn’t take compliments like being pretty or dainty well, but she’d take badass. She was okay with being badass. “So, Belle… can I ask you what you do for a living? I’m kind of curious.” Emma glanced at her companion before ordering a ‘hawaiian breeze’ smoothie, something with pineapple and citrus and mango. Sounded good to Swan, anyway.

“Oh, I’m a personal assistant and security advisor for Winston Frost.” And a spy working with a mysterious government agency after being retired by the CIA thanks to dream fuckery. She wasn’t having a great year, boyfriend aside. She decided to go with a banana strawberry smoothie, because you couldn’t beat a classic. “It’s pretty fun, I like my coworkers a lot.”

Winston Frost didn’t ring any bells for Emma, but she didn’t need to know Belle’s employer. Emma was new to the area, after all, and maybe the name wasn’t a big one. “It’s important to have some degree of fun at your job. The first three years of my working life I was doing jobs I didn’t particularly like. Never going back to that.” Emma shrugged her shoulders, because she wasn’t going to let herself shiver. Those had been some uncomfortable years. “Have you lived in California long?” The smoothie place was at least quick, so they paid and got their drinks without really having to wait. Emma wasn’t sure where Belle would have liked to sit so she just gestured to the other woman to lead.

Belle picked a seat where she could have her back to the wall and observe the whole store as much as possible. She sipped her drink, listening to Emma’s story. “Sounds rough. I just moved here not too long ago. I’ve always done security related things. Travel a lot. I like t’ keep movin’.” She wasn’t sure how she’d adapt, long term, to living in one place with one person for more than a couple years. “How about you? Don’t seem like anybody’s actually from here.”

"Kind of a rolling stone myself, actually. After I turned seventeen, anyway, didn't stay anywhere longer than two years." Usually less. It wasn't exactly that she hated the places she had left behind, but her feet would itch or she would see a greener pasture to realize it wasn't that green at all. It was nice that she had been able to see a lot of the country, in intersecting across the states trying to find one that fit. No luck so far, but maybe Emma would never find a 'fit'.

"I've been here a few months. Seemed like a smart call for work." And so far it had been; she had been working a lot, and for good pay. "I wanna see it in fair weather, though, I want to live on the beach."

Belle could sympathize with that. She’d been a year younger when she started training for the CIA, and she’d started field work a few years after that. Ever since then she’d wandered, going where she was needed, until she wasn’t needed anymore. Part of her was still sad about it. “Yeah, plenty’a starlets and the like here. Must keep you pretty busy.”

“Yeah, it does. And that’s good, I like to be busy,” Emma said with a small shrug. And it was true, she did like to work and work hard. For the first time in a long time, she was actually able to save money and accumulate, but … toward what? “I just wonder if I’m working too hard, you know? It’s like I forgot to live in between somehow.” Emma took a sip of her smoothie before shaking her head. “Sorry, that was depressing.”

“Nah.” Belle shook her head. “I can sympathize. It’s hard t’ really settle down and let people in when you’re on the move. I wondered sometimes if I could even remember what bein’ a normal person felt like.” That was a little too honest, but she hoped it wouldn’t become a problem. If she suspected everyone of being out to get her she was just going to exhaust herself.

“I’m not even sure I’ve ever been normal. So now that I’m trying it’s like I don’t know what I’m doing.” Emma shook her head with a small sigh. Moving around had been good but it had been bad too. She’d missed out on a lot of life that she was finding she really wanted to be apart of. “Is it working for you? Or do you think you’re going to move on again sometime soon?” Because letting people in was so intimidating, Emma still worried that sooner or later, she’d stop trying.

Belle wondered if they were secretly the same person, minus intense spy training and dreaming of being an assassin. “I dunno. I’d probably be more inclined t’ move around if Nicholas was wanting to, so I guess in some ways I have settled. All the reasons you’ve got for wanting to stay aloof are true. It hurts like a bitch to lose someone you love. I’m not sure I could ever go back to how I was. For all that it hurts, I like myself more now.”

That was a good reassurance. Emma was kind of aware that the way she’d been living, trusting and relying only on herself; it was like half-existing. She didn’t want to be that way anymore, she wanted to have people around her that she was brave enough to care about. It was just intimidating to make connections when every single one she’d made before she’d lost. And not always pleasantly. Still, she gave Belle a small smile. “I’m finally trying, after ten years. I hope it turns out as well for me.” Sometimes she wasn’t sure it would be, but the connection she’d made with Mary Margaret especially felt like something worth sticking around for.

“The dating thing, though, I’m just not sure I’m up for that yet,” Emma said with a sigh. “Seems so hard to find a good one. You’re lucky you did.”

“Just gotta look in the right place. I wasn’t lookin’ at all. He came around lookin’ for a job as a security guard. I thought he was hot so I asked him for a drink afterward. It was enormously unprofessional, but I’m still gettin’ used to caring about whether I keep a job or not.” She was a little embarrassed in hindsight. “He was nice, so we kept meetin’ and after a while I realized that I did like him for more than just the superficial stuff.” It wasn’t the most romantic story in the world, but it wasn’t over yet. They’d have time to be romantic later.

“Yeah?” Emma didn’t really care that much about romance, really, the story was actually kind of cute. In her opinion. Emma had questionable taste but she would rather hear about people finding a random connection than love-at-first sight bullshit. “Maybe you’re right. I’ve gone on a few dates since I got here, but … nothing substantial. I just wanted to get laid.” Was that a little too honest? Whoops. “You might have a good point, about not looking for it. Maybe for some people it just happens.”

Belle laughed. “You know, the longer we talk the more I wonder if we’re related. There’s nothing wrong with gettin’ what you need. Lord knows that was my MO for quite some time.” Eighteen years, really. “If you find the right guy it won’t matter that you just wanted to kick his ass at pool, ride him like a pony, and never see him again.”

Emma had never had someone make that kind of joke before, but she was actually flattered. “Well, we are both blonde…” And it did seem like they had some weird similarities, from smoking to being more interested than sex over relationships. “Maybe. If we’re secret twins, I wonder which is the good one…” Okay, bad joke officially over, Emma added, “It’s nice to know you figured it out. Maybe there’s hope for me.”

Belle laughed. “Were not twins, I’m older than you.” Actually, her mother had taken off on her family pretty early in her life. It wasn’t impossible, but it was extremely unlikely. “There’s hope for everyone who wants it.”

Hope for everyone that wanted it. For a long time, Emma wasn’t sure she’d wanted it. She wasn’t sure why she had decided now she did, but she wasn’t going to question it. For now, she wanted to be more than what she was, and that was enough for now. She was almost done with her smoothie, though, which meant this meeting was probably going to be over soon. “You don’t know that for sure,” Emma said, because Belle certainly didn’t look old! Emma fished out a business card from her wallet, and quickly scribbled her cell on the back. “If you ever want a workout partner or … a smoothie partner, I guess. Give me a call.”

Belle took the card with a smile. “Thank you. I’ll text you real quick so you’ll have my number, too.” She glanced at the card and pulled her phone out, to send the text. “Feel free to call me if you ever need a hand with anything.” She set the text and stood. “It was a pleasure, but I gotta get goin’, too.” Winston was going to tease her about being gone so long.

“No problem.” Emma’s phone chimed from inside her pocket, a good indication she’d gotten the number. Emma rose, taking what remained of her drink with her. “It was nice to meet you, and stay strong on the cigarettes. The first couple months without are the hardest.” With that, she gave the older blonde a small nod, before heading on her way.