star_glinda (star_glinda) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-10-10 23:35:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, elphaba thropp, glinda upland |
Who: Elphaba and Glinda
When: Start of Oct
Where: Elphaba’s office
What: Glinda and Elphie talk about life after Evil!Lúthien
Rating/Warning: Low/Mentions of a previous uncomfortable situation
Status: Complete
Elphaba sat behind her desk gazing into space. She’d found it hard to concentrate since everything had kicked off with Lúthien. She kept thinking about what had happened with the tree and everything and whether she had done the right thing by going back to her. Elphaba didn’t trust easily and Lúthien was the first person she had ever truly loved. Was it enough? Would it happen again?
Glinda had been worried when Elphaba had gone back to Lúthien but didn’t see it as her place to say anything. As much as she loved Elphie as her dear friend she still felt that Elphie wasn’t quite on board, a part of her still felt judged by the other woman and Glinda wasn’t sure if it was just her imagination or not.
Still it didn’t stop her worrying and as such she entered Elphaba’s office in a whirlwind of pink and sat down in the chair opposite the desk. “Morning Elphie” she said with a smile, “How are you?” she added somewhat more seriously.
“Glinda?” Elphaba jumped as she heard the woman’s voice, jerking to looking at her. “Oh god, is it that time already?” Elphaba looked toward the clock on her desk and set about sorting out her paperwork into the relevant files. “Sorry, I just got...distracted,” she explained, righting her desk frantically.
“I’m afraid so” Glinda laughed, “Don’t worry, there’s no rush, you know I can wait” she said kindly. Placing a hand over Elphaba’s softly, “How are you Elphie?” she asked in concern.
“I’m…” Elphaba went to reply immediately, then stopped her fidgeting looked up at her friend. “I’m ok...I think,” she told her. “I...I don’t know…”
Glinda nodded, “Well you had a traumatic experience” she said softly, “It’s understandable you’re a little concerned or hesitant. Is Lúthien treating you properly?” she asked as gently as she could.
“We talked,” Elphaba gave a little shrug. “She apologised profusely,” she fiddled with a stapler near her hand. “I’ve moved back home but it’s...I guess I still feel a little...nervous that it’ll happen again or something,” she admitted quietly.
“It’ll take time to trust again” Glinda said, “But you know anytime you need space or anything you can come to my place, okay? Don’t ever feel trapped Elphie”
“Thanks Glinda,” Elphaba smiled at her. “I don’t want to make her feel like I don’t trust her or don’t want to be with her because I do but...I find myself wondering more often than not about what would I do if it happened again?”
“That’s understandable” Glinda replied, “She must get it, surely. I mean it was a terrible thing to experience, she should give you as much time and understanding as you need” It was obvious to Glinda that it would be something only time could help them recover from.
“I think she gets it, to a degree,” Elphaba admitted. “But...it’s different when it’s happened to you. She all but attacked me, or at least...a part of her attacked me...and the fact that that resided in her in the first place still plays on my mind.”
Glinda nodded, “It’s a difficult situation for both of you” she said, “I wish I had answers Elphie, I really do” she added sadly.
“I know, thanks,” Elphaba smiled at her, placing her left hand on her friend’s. She gazed at her ring finger sadly. “I don’t know if I told you, but we’d just gotten engaged before all of this happened,” she told her quietly.
“Oh Elphie” Glinda said on a sigh, turning her hand to hold her friends. Lúthien had told her but Glinda hadn’t had a chance to tell Elphaba how happy she was for her. It made her sad to think how quickly things could change.
“That’s the worst part...I’m not even sure where we stand on that front now,” Elphaba told her. “I love her…so much, and I know she loves me and I want to marry her, but I can’t help the tiny voice in the back of my mind wondering whether she might do it again,” she sighed heavily.
“That tiny voice will stop eventually” Glinda said, “But it is going to take time. Nobody expects you to be able to pick up where you left off like nothing happened, and if you expect that of yourself you’re not as smart as I thought you were” Elphaba expected too much of herself a lot of the time, in Glinda’s opinion, and this was something that simply wouldn’t be hurried.
“Yeah,” Elphaba sighed heavily. “Maybe I’m not,” she murmured, more to herself than Glinda. “Anyway,” she sat up, shaking her head and pushing her hair back over her shoulders. “Here’s me being all maudlin, what about you? Are you ok?”
“Oh you know me, I’m always okay” Glinda smiled at her friend, she wasn’t not really but her own problems seemed small compared to what Elphaba was going through. “Shiny and happy as usual”
Elphaba narrowed her eyes at Glinda, not believing what she said, “Bull, now spill.”
Glinda’s eyebrows raised as Elphaba called her out, honestly she hadn’t expected it. Usually people were content to accept her bright smile and assurances. “It’s nothing Elphie really, just silly me being silly”
“Glinda…” Elphaba warned, giving her a knowing look with an amused smile. “Come on, talk to me,” she encouraged.
Glinda sighed, she didnt want to burden her friend but Elphaba was like a dog with a bone when she wanted to be. "I delayed my course until January because we are so busy with the fashion house and I'm just worried that people will think it's because I'm not serious. I mean I didn't even think I'd get in"
“‘Not serious’?!” Elphaba’s eyebrows shot up. “Why on earth would people think that? You’re delaying what is going to be a huge part of your life in order to finish a massive project which is bringing together artists from the community to work together. It shows you have the dedication to see a project through and the sense not to overload yourself with another huge change that you want to make for your life,” she smiled at the woman. “I’m sorry that you have to do that, but it means that we can concentrate on getting the fashion house up and running before looking forward to your next project.”
"I'm flighty" an airhead, was unspoken but there, "People see me and assume things, you should know that. People expect me to fail or quit when things get too hard. I'm not clever and I don't always understand things. I should just stick to clothes and not try to enter a world I don't fit in" Although Glinda spoke it was quite obvious the words were not her own.
“Why?” Elphaba queried. “Why should anyone dictate what you want to do? And if it matters, then prove them wrong, like you have already with the label,” she told her. “I’ll be honest, when we met I didn’t know what to make of you because we were so different, but you proved that you can be a shrewd business woman and a hard worker when you’ve got something you care about to work on. I don’t expect your work on this course to be any different,” she told her.
"It was very obvious what you made of me" Glinda said, though she had a small smile on her face, "I'm glad you don't think that now though. You gave me a lot of courage Elphie, even when you werent sure I could do it" It had been the first time anybody had properly believed in her and so different to what her family had drilled into her.
“So there you go, you can do anything you put your mind to,” Elphaba told her as she moved over to the coffee machine. “You’re smarter than you give yourself credit for, y’know, just believe in yourself and your ability to change. Coffee?”
Glinda nodded, Elphie was right she could prove them all wrong and putting back her course wasn't failing it was actually succeeding but in another area of her life. "That would be lovely, thank you"
“Cream, sugar?” Elphaba asked as the machine filtered the coffee through for them. “Feeling better about it now?”
"Sugar no cream" Glinda replied and nodded, "I am. Thank you. I'm sorry to have put that on you though with everything you are dealing with"
“That’s ok,” Elphaba shook her head as she sorted out the cups. “I’d rather you told me than keep it bottled up inside, besides it’s only fair considering how I turned up on your doorstep the other day,” she picked up the cups and moved over to sit back at her desk, placing Glinda’s cup in front of her. “Sorry about that by the way, but with Nessa gone, you’re really my only friend,” she admitted almost bashfully as she stirred her coffee.
"Don't apologise, I'm glad you felt you could come to me" Glinda said, "You're my only friend too. I know a lot of people but none of them really care. My place can always be a safe haven for you, whenever you need it"
“Thanks, Glinda,” Elphaba smiled up at the woman. “And the same for you, although we do still have a half-burnt tree in the hallway,” she grimaced at that. She and Lúthien really did need to talk about that.
“Oh well you know I’m sure a few ribbons and pretty things will help it look absolutely lovely” Glinda suggested.
Elphaba laughed at that. “Well, I need to talk to Lúthien about whether she wants to replace it or not first, then we’ll see about decorating it,” she smiled. “Say, I’m going to be naughty and break into my secret stash of chocolate, want some?” she offered.
“Well, unsurprisingly, I have quite a lot of ribbon so let me know if you do decorate it” she grinned, before nodding, “I can’t resist naughty chocolate”
“Shut the door then,” Elphaba told her. “Don’t want any of my co-workers figuring out where I keep my stash,” she joked, getting the key for her lower drawer to retrieve the chocolate. Today was a chocolate day.